by Jeff Zentner
name in my ear
This world is knives and wolves
but also swans and stars;
you taught me that
Once, in August,
before you had to beg
the air for breath,
I watched a hawk descend
on a field and fly back
into the yawning
blue with talons empty
I marveled at a creature
that could fall
without being fallen
and still rise
clutching such emptiness and hunger
To learn of loss is only to know it
a little and not to become armored
against its fearsome edge
The sun is setting now
as I write this in the first season
of your absence
And I see you
in the wild light;
I hear you whisper
“tree” and “wind” to me
in the wild light
Acknowledgments
Every set of acknowledgments has to begin with my amazing agents, Charlie Olsen, Lyndsey Blessing, and Philippa Milnes-Smith, and my brilliant editorial team of Emily Easton, Lynne Missen, and Claire Nist. Of course, they couldn’t work their magic without the hard work and dedication of Phoebe Yeh and everyone at Crown Books for Young Readers, Barbara Marcus, Judith Haut, John Adamo, Dominique Cimina, Mary McCue, Melinda Ackell, Natalia Dextre, Ana Deboo, Ray Shappell, Alison Impey, Kelly McGauley, Adrienne Waintraub, Kristin Schulz, Emily DuVal, Erica Stone, Caitlin Whalen, Kate Keating, Elizabeth Ward, Jena DeBois, and Jenn Inzetta.
Kerry Kletter: I’ve never met a person with keener perceptions into humanity. Your writing reminds me of the possibilities of precise, beautiful language and clear insight. I don’t know how I ever wrote without your friendship, brilliance, wisdom, and critical eye. Yes, I cut and pasted that last part from my last two sets of acknowledgments, but what’s true is true. Here’s to huge pretzels, laughter-until-crying, and solving stupid mysteries.
Brittany Cavallaro: Thank you for your patience with my amateurish poetry. It’s easy to see why you’re such a beloved teacher in addition to being a beloved and brilliant author and poet.
Emily Henry: Thank you for your nonstop hilarity and inspiring me with your unbounded creative energy. It is such a pleasure seeing the world discover what I know.
David Arnold: There’s no one with whom I’d rather watch Wes Anderson movies in front of a roaring fire. I’m waiting to find out when we were separated at birth.
Rich Pak: I hope readers can figure out which character is based on you. Some people are so cool, a version of them needs to be in a book.
Dr. Jeremy Voros: A lifesaver and a hero in every sense of the word, including in helping me with the medicine in this book. Anything that’s unrealistic and dumb is my fault, not yours.
My early readers: Brendan Kiely, Adriana Mather, and Janet McNally. Y’all are amazing.
Grace Gordon: The world’s best Connecticut consultant.
Vi Maurey: O melhor consultante do Rio de Janeiro no mundo.
Cam Napier: I couldn’t have written this book without your invaluable private school knowledge.
Sean Davies: For your invaluable scientific knowledge.
Leslie Cartier: For your invaluable crew knowledge.
My bosses, Michael Driver, Jenny Howard, and Emily Urban. I get asked all the time how I manage to write with a full-time job. You are how. Thank you.
Ocean Vuong: For showing me the possibility of language.
Jason Reynolds: For your work giving youth a lifeline in books.
Sabaa Tahir: For the music you bring the world in your words, and the literal music you bring me.
Silas House: One of my greatest triumphs as a writer is that it has allowed me to know my idols.
The readers, librarians, educators, booksellers, podcasters, book clubbers, Instagrammers, and bloggers (and every other category of book people) who have been such advocates for my books: I see you and the work you do, and I am so deeply appreciative. You make our country a better place when there are so many forces trying to do the opposite.
Mom and Dad, Brooke, Adam, and Steve: I love you all.
Grandma Z, I miss you. You are part of this book.
The love of my life, my best friend, and my first reader, Sara. There’s no one I’d rather be quarantined with. There’s no one I’d rather spend my life with. I could not have written this or any other book without your love and support and the happiness you give me.
My precious boy, Tennessee. Being your father is the greatest honor I’ll ever know. Thank you for being my son. I love you more than words can say.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Jeff Zentner is the author of the New York Times Notable Book The Serpent King, Goodbye Days, and Rayne & Delilah’s Midnite Matinee. He has won the William C. Morris Award, the Amelia Elizabeth Walden Award, the International Literacy Association Young Adults’ Book Award, and the Westchester Fiction Award. He’s a two-time Southern Book Prize finalist, has been longlisted for the Carnegie Medal, and was a finalist for the Indies Choice Award. He was also selected as a Publishers Weekly Flying Start and an Indies Introduce pick. His books have been translated into fifteen languages. Before becoming a writer, he was a musician who recorded with Iggy Pop, Nick Cave, and Debbie Harry. He lives in Nashville with his wife and son. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, or visit him at jeffzentnerbooks.com.
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