Far From Destined: A Promise Me Novel

by Carrie Ann Ryan

“The detective said there’s nothing he can do. Just like he always says.”

  “I hate that asshole,” I growled.

  “Well, so do I. And yet right now, we can’t do anything but stay vigilant. The detective said he’d send somebody to talk to Adam, but for now, all we have is hearsay. And a note they may or may not be able to trace to him. I’m not a high priority. My son isn’t either.”

  “You’re a fucking high priority to me. Both of you,” I added without thinking.

  Again, I noticed the glances, but I ignored them.

  Myra cleared her throat. “I’m in between projects right now. I can take over most of Nancy’s and Constance’s duties. Do we think Constance should be alone during this time when she’s with Joshua?”

  “And you think you should be alone with him?” Nate asked.

  “I think I have trained in self-defense long enough that I can handle myself.”

  “And I think nobody should be alone when this guy’s out there.”

  Nate and Myra kept going at it, and finally, I stood up between them as Dakota had earlier.

  “If you guys can’t handle being in the same room together, you need to go.”

  “As much as I appreciate all of you,” Dakota began, “fighting with each other isn’t helping anything. This is my problem. I can handle it.”

  I whirled on her. “No, you don’t get to back away because they’re arguing.”

  “Joshua is my son. Adam is my mistake. I’ll figure it out.”

  “Fuck, no. You’re one of us now. We’ll figure this out together.”

  “Just like you went off to fight with other people? No, you did that alone. You might’ve walked away, but you’re the one who risked your life. You don’t get to yell at me if I’m not living up to your standards.”

  I wanted to growl, but instead, I ran my hands through my hair and started to pace.

  “Dakota, a lot of things have happened all at once. And now we’re here to make sure that Joshua and you are safe. If that means Nate and Myra have to be alone in a fucking room and not fight while watching your son, that’s what’s going to happen.”

  “That’s what I was thinking,” Nate said snidely.

  I glared at him. “You think you can handle that? You think you two can stop sniping at each other and deal with whatever the fuck is going on between you two long enough to keep Joshua safe?”

  “Of course, we can.” Myra sounded angrier than I’ve ever heard her before. “Besides, nothing is going on between Nate and me, despite what all of you guys want to romanticize. However, again, I don’t need Nate there.”

  “You damn well do,” Nate shouted.

  I rubbed my temples, and Dakota fisted her hands at her sides.

  She had gone pale, and I cursed.

  “Stop yelling. This isn’t helping anyone,” I said.

  “Listen, this is what we’re going to do,” Paris added, pushing me down to sit next to Dakota on the loveseat. I wrapped my arm around her, pulling her close. She just stiffened in my hold a little but didn’t pull away. I counted that as a win. “Myra is going to help Constance, and when Myra is alone without her, then Nate will step in. Both of you work from home. Though I know you can’t bring your whole studio with you, Myra. But you said you’re between projects. So, until we can formulate another plan, this is what we’re going to do. Dakota, I know you hate this, but we are your family. We are your touchstones. We’re going to help. And when you’re at work, you’re not alone. However, if Jason or Pop can’t be with you, then one of us will be.”

  “And you’re not staying alone in your house either,” I growled.

  “Excuse me?” Dakota asked.

  “I’m very comfortable on your floor or your couch. Until we get a bead on Adam, consider me your roommate.”

  “Oh, fuck no,” Dakota growled.

  “Actually, that might be a good idea,” Cross said. “And not just Macon. If Adam is watching your house and knows that there are people constantly in and out, maybe he’ll get it out of his head to come near you. Same with your shop. We all work around there, we can come in more often. You’re not alone, Dakota.”

  “I hate this.” She rubbed her face. I just held her closer and kissed the top of her head.

  “I know. But we’re going to fix it. And it’s not going to be forever.”

  “But how long will it be?” she asked.

  I didn’t have an answer for that. For now, we would work together, be on high alert, and try to figure out what Adam wanted. But until then, we had to stay strong and do what we could. And that meant keeping Dakota and Joshua safe.

  Even if she hated it, and even if it hurt my chances for anything more with her.

  Chapter 13

  Dakota

  * * *

  There were times in my life where I wondered how I’d ended up in that particular place. Those moments tended to flash through my memory whenever I stood at another crossroads, trying to discover answers to all my many questions.

  Like when I ended up pregnant, far too young, and tried to find my way.

  When I held Joshua for the first time and wondered how I would do it on my own, yet knew I would fight to the death to ensure that he always knew he was loved.

  When my parents left me alone when I was fifteen and walked away because they were tired of being parents and hadn’t wanted to deal with a so-called wayward teen.

  The time that I’d had my first drink at sixteen.

  And the time I smoked my first bowl with Adam—my first and my last. I hadn’t liked the loss of control, but I had been seventeen and thought that’s what my boyfriend wanted.

  I hadn’t realized that by giving up my control, I had given up a part of myself until it was nearly too late.

  I remembered the time that I had decided to do something for myself and had earned my associate’s degree, right after I got my GED.

  And the time I took the job as a barista in the place that was now the Boulder Bean when the former owners had been so sweet to me and had been nearly like grandparents to Joshua. They had been better than my parents ever were or tried to be. I could remember them vividly, holding my hand when Joshua got his first cold, or making sure I had adequate daycare. They always put his care above all else.

  And then there was the time they had left me alone, retiring when Mr. Barker had his heart attack, and we’d nearly lost him.

  They moved to Florida to be near their kids and their real grandkids, and I had lost a part of myself when they went. But they had allowed me to start the Boulder Bean.

  And that was another moment flashing in my mind.

  I had been saving for it, putting away my nickels and dimes, but because of the goodness of their hearts, their business savvy, the loan I had qualified for, and hard work, now this place was mine.

  And I was smart with it. Most businesses around here didn’t last two years, and we were going on three. We might’ve had an established base, but in this iteration, we were on three years.

  All while Joshua had grown, I had grown, and I had found some of my favorite people in the world.

  I had met the girls because of my shop. Had formed a pact to begin my future.

  I had met the Bradys.

  Everything came together, coalescing into vividly splashed memories across my mind as I worked on cleaning up for the evening.

  All of those moments in time were fragments of who I was. When I stood back and wondered how on earth any of it had happened. How could I be here when it felt like fate had been pushing me in another direction, yet somehow, a choice or a mistake or a decision had brought me here.

  And now…this was another moment.

  Where my past mistakes were coming back to haunt me.

  Adam had given me my most precious gift, and yet he was threatening to take it away.

  To take Joshua.

  To take me?

  Maybe to take my business.

  I didn’t know.

  He wanted to take s
omething. Needed to let me know that he thought he still owned me. I didn’t know what the answer was. What would be the safest recourse? For now, I had to learn to lean on my friends. And I wasn’t doing a very good job of that.

  “Hey, there. I need to head home soon,” Pop said. “Jason headed out already. Got himself a date with Sam.”

  I grinned. “Sam is adorable. And I’m so glad that they got up the nerve to ask Jason out.”

  “It took a lot of time, but I think if they have enough courage to handle the world as it is, they can probably handle Jason.”

  I snorted at that. “We’re all closed up here. I have a few more things to work out in the back, but you can head out if you want.”

  Pop shook her head, folded her arms over her chest, and leaned against the doorway. “Nope. I don’t think so. You know the rules. No one’s allowed to be here alone.”

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I grumbled.

  “You’re only saying that because you feel like you’re inconveniencing me. I know you’re worried about my safety just as much as you’re worried about everyone else’s—other than yours.”

  Feeling ashamed, my cheeks reddened. “I just hate the idea that he could come after you because of me.”

  “You hold on right there. The only reason he would come after me is because of his issues. You have nothing to do with it, other than him fixating on you. Don’t worry about me. We are going to stay here together. The place is locked, and when you’re ready to go, we will head out.”

  “Actually, if you need to head home, Pop, I can walk you to your car, then stay with Dakota while she finishes up.”

  Pop and I froze before we spun around on our heels to look at Macon standing in the doorway, his hands up, the keys that I had given him dangling from his fingers.

  “Shit, I didn’t mean to scare you. I could have sworn you guys heard me. Or even saw me on the cameras.”

  I looked down at the monitors and did indeed see him. I probably should have noticed him walking closer.

  “I’ve been so stuck in my head that I’m acting like an idiot. I’m one of those people that the viewers scream at in a horror movie to look behind them or to not go down the stairs or lock themselves in the basement. The dumb blonde that gets murdered like in the first scene before they even show the title credits.”

  Pop burst out laughing, and Macon just gave me a look.

  “What?” I asked.

  “That was very specific. I feel like you have had this dissertation on horror movies and the way that we portray women in them before.”

  “It’s true,” Pop said. “Don’t even get me started.”

  “One day, I’d like to hear it,” Macon added. “However, the place is locked, and I’ll get you to your car safely, Pop. You can stay right here, Dakota.”

  “I don’t think so,” I said. “I have some more work to do, and Joshua is at a sleepover. I can walk you out together, and then come back in.”

  Macon nodded. “Sounds good. Joshua stopped by here earlier to say goodnight, right?”

  I smiled, my heart growing two sizes at the thought. “He was so cute and excited. He can’t wait to tell them all about Mama Cat and her babies.”

  Macon winced. “I think we named her Mama Cat. My grandfather had a cat up in Oregon named Mama Cat, actually. A wild feral that hated me. However, it looks like the new Mama Cat has a name.”

  I shook my head. “Either that or we’ll make something work.”

  “Oh, you guys are too cute.”

  I glared at Pop and then grabbed my phone. “Come on. We’ll walk you to your car. I have to stay here and finish up the last couple of things that can’t be done at home. If I didn’t, I would head out for the day with you.”

  Pop studied my face. “Just stay safe. And I want to hear all about Joshua’s sleepover.”

  “I can’t believe my baby boy is big enough for a sleepover,” I said, and Macon wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head.

  “Well, he’s still going to come running to you for a long while.”

  “Six just seems too young.”

  Macon shrugged. “It’s with his best friend, and I have a feeling the other boy’s mother has already been texting you.”

  “Every twenty minutes with pictures. They’re adorable.”

  “Make sure you show them to me, too,” Pop said.

  “I’ll forward them to you,” I ensured.

  We made sure Pop got to her car. After she drove off, Macon took my hand and led me back into the Boulder Bean. We closed the area, made sure it was locked, then went back to my office.

  “I hate that you have to be here for this. There are just some things I need to finish here. After that, we do not have to stay. It’s got to be boring for you.”

  Macon shook his head and then pulled out his tablet. “I have a few things I can do here. And you have this nice comfy chair. Don’t worry, we’ll just work some, and then we’ll get something to eat.”

  “You’re going to stay the night?” I asked, swallowing hard.

  “You know I want to,” he whispered.

  “What are we doing?” I asked without thinking.

  He set down his tablet on the desk and then stood up, prowling towards me. He put a hand on either side of me on my office chair and leaned forward, his forehead resting against mine, his presence so big, so…Macon.

  “What is it you think we’re doing?” he asked.

  “You can’t just ask a question in answer to a question.”

  “I do believe I have. Now, I suppose I should answer your original one. As to what we’re doing? Anything you want. But you know we’re not just friends, Dakota. You can lie to yourself, but you can’t lie to me.”

  I swallowed hard, looking up at him. I wanted to reach out and trail my fingers down his chest, but I didn’t. Somehow, I resisted. “You know this is a mistake. There’s so much going on. We shouldn’t. I don’t want to hurt you.”

  He leaned forward just a bit more, his lips close to mine. “You’re not going to hurt me. And I’m not going to hurt you. But, Dakota? I want to fucking kiss you.”

  “Then kiss me,” I whispered.

  Suddenly, his lips were on mine, and I was lost.

  He kissed me slowly as if learning my mouth, figuring out exactly what I tasted like and absorbing the essence of my touch. He tasted of coffee and warmth. And I wanted more. I craved it.

  And then my hands were on his chest, feeling the hardness of him. When my palm moved over the center of his chest, he froze for the barest instant, and I pulled away.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered.

  “Scar’s always going to be there, Dakota. I guess I should get used to you touching it.”

  “I thought that was my line,” I whispered.

  He smiled then and reached up to pluck me off the chair.

  I let out a gasp, and then my ass was on my desk, his tablet hitting the floor.

  “Macon!”

  “It’s insured. It’ll be fine. Probably. I don’t give a fuck.”

  When his mouth crashed into mine, I dug my fingers into his hair, and he squeezed my hips. He slid in between my legs, and I wrapped myself around him, clinging, needing.

  “This is insane,” I whispered.

  “This is a long time coming.”

  He kept kissing me, trailing his lips down my neck, tugging on my shirt. I did the same for him, and he held up his arms and let me strip him. He had put on a t-shirt after work, and now he was bare to his jeans, the long, lean lines of him intoxicating. His chest was broad, and he had an eight-pack. A freaking eight-pack.

  And even though I knew it was wrong, I wanted to picture him in the ring, sweat-slick as he fought and used every single one of his muscles.

  Of course, I also wanted to see those muscles being used in other ways, as he hovered over me, sliding inside me.

  “What just gave you that look? What were you thinking?” he asked, hesitance in his voice.
/>   I looked up at him, past the scar I knew he thought I was staring at.

  “I was thinking about you fucking me after you fought. And I knew it was wrong.” I reached out and gently laid my hand over his scar. He twitched, freezing. “Macon, I wasn’t thinking about this. Unless you want me to. I was just thinking about you.”

  He put his hand over mine and squeezed. “I want to see you.”

  “Then do. And touch me. Because I don’t think I can wait any longer.”

  Who was this woman? I had been on dates before, a couple after Adam. I’d had sex before. I liked it. I used to think I was good at sex.

  But this woman? The one who spoke as if she couldn’t get enough and said what she wanted?

  It didn’t feel like me.

  But I loved it.

  He stripped off my shirt, and then his hands were on my breasts over my bra. I moaned, letting my head fall back.

  “You’re so beautiful.”

  “I have stretch marks from Joshua. I’m not a skinny little model. You’re all hard and fit. I’m not exactly that.”

  “You’re fucking beautiful, and if you put yourself down one more time, I’m going to toss you over my knee and spank you.”

  My eyes widened. “Macon Brady. Is that your kink?” I asked with a laugh that wasn’t so much full of humor as intrigue. I pressed my thighs tighter around his hips at the thought. I was not into spanking, but the idea of Macon doing it? That, I might need to imagine.

  “It’s not, but the idea of my hand on that ass of yours? I may have to try.”

  And then he kissed me again, and my bra was off. He moved to his knees in front of me, my desk low enough that he was able to kiss up my stomach. I leaned down, just enough so he could play with my breasts.

  He kept licking and then undid my pants. We maneuvered, and then he was standing again, and I was left in my panties, his lips on my breasts, sucking, the sensations going straight to my pussy.

  “I have a condom in my bag,” he whispered, the growl tightening my core.

  I looked up at him, blushing. “You always carry a condom with you?” I asked. “Not that I’m judging. Because I like safe sex, I like sex period. And I really want to have sex right now. I can’t believe I’m talking so quickly or even saying any of this out loud.”