“He’s not my boyfriend,” Izobel snapped. “How is it you heard that anyway?” She shook her head. “You know what, never mind.”
“What the hell is going on?” Deklan growled.
“It’s complicated. I’m safe. I will give back your car as soon as I get the chance. Right now, I need to talk to Claudia.”
“If you have to talk to Claudia why did you call your boyfriend?’ Abel asked genuinely curious.
Izobel’s glare should have turned him to ash on the spot. “Would you let me get through this?”
“Who is that?” Deklan demanded.
Izobel rolled her eyes and dropped her head against her shoulders. Caught between the two most annoying men on this planet, she huffed out an annoyed breath. “He’s my frenemy. And I told you it was just sex. Can we move on now?”
Abel laughed. This was the most entertainment he’d had in a while. “Frenemy, huh?”
Izobel narrowed her eyes. Abel held his hands up in surrender still laughing at her.
“Look, I need Claudia. My sister’s life is at stake. This is important Deklan,” Izobel’s voice softened.
“Fine,” Deklan growled. “But we are eventually going to have this conversation. I deserve at least that”
Izobel formed a gun with her hand, stuck it in her mouth, and pantomimed pulling the trigger. Abel flopped down on the couch entirely way too amused for Izobel’s taste.
“I’ll call you back.” With that, Deklan hung up.
Izobel huffed out an annoyed breath and set the phone down on the table. This wouldn’t just go away. She had too many plates spinning to give this any attention at all, but something in her didn’t like the idea of hurting him.
“It’s never just sex,” Abel mused. He wove his fingers together and rested the back of his head against his palms. “One side always catches feelings.”
“What would you know about it?” Izobel pouted. She flopped down on the other end of the couch curling one leg underneath her.
“I have a life you know,” he shot back. His face crumbled after a few seconds. “Well, had.”
Izobel laughed. It was a good sound. It felt like eons since the last time she had. “Deklan is a decent guy. He’s smart. Caring. And he’s always there when I need him. So of course, I don’t want anything to do with him.”
“You’re scared of him, you mean.”
She cocked a brow looking the question at him with a haughty trace to her shoulders but she was a little on the defensive, he could tell.
“The one person willing to make it work. To brush away all your excuses and force you to tangle with your demons.”
“You sound like you speak from experience,” Izobel said reaching for her tea.
“I do. Though, I was smart enough not to fall into bed with mine.”
“Loneliness is a cruel bitch.”
“That she is.” Abel smiled and held out his beer. Izobel clinked her mug against the bottle.
Izobel found it odd the comfort this stranger gave. He understood her. There were few people in this world who did. Difficult. Stubborn. Distant. And those were the nice descriptors her few friends had for her. Izobel had a hard time connecting. That story generally gets tacked onto someone who had something stolen from them. It’s true, Izobel lost her mother young. But she’d always known it was coming. She’d accepted death as part of life. Nothing lasts forever. Especially love.
She just couldn’t build bridges the way other people did. All the love and protection Izobel was capable of funneled down into her baby sister. Zoe was the shining beacon that kept Izobel on the light side of the spectrum.
“So who’s Claudia?” Abel asked.
“She’s the head of our circle. If there is anyone in a tri-state area that knows anything about your kind of magic, Claudia can point me to them.”
“And Deklan is the only way to get ahold of her?” He made a face that read mocking skepticism.
“Yeah, actually.” Izobel sighed. “Deklan has already done enough for me. I don’t want him anywhere near the rest of my problems. Claudia doesn’t believe in phones. This prison you have yourself here would be perfect for her. Cut off from the world is how she likes it.”
The corners of his mouth pulled down in an impresses expression. He shook his head. “Poor guy.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Izobel asked.
“I’ve been sure not to take my perfect someone to my bed because I know damned well she’ll put me on the right path. Even with that mistake, yours don’t have a chance.”
24
Chapter
Connor was particularly down on his luck and petulant as all he could be today. Johnny continued the search for the missing ratchet, keeping his tongue leashed. He would kill to have the kind of demons Connor wrestled with. But that’s what happens when you can’t see someone else’s forest for your trees. It divided house Merrick for the last century and sent three brothers on distinctly different paths.
The toll secrets took on this family was staggering. But every time they were faced with the brunt of dealing with the aftermath they closed ranks and hid it beneath the biggest rock they could find. Considering Johnny was one of those secrets, and now had one of his own, he kept his thoughts to himself on the matter.
Connor wasn’t ready to listen to anyone anyway. He was just too angry. He had his reasons and Johnny agreed with every one. His problem was the way Connor dealt with them. And there was no changing that mind.
“Just be careful,” Johnny warned. “We’re at capacity as it is.”
He handed his brother the heavy backpack. Johnny wished there was something else to say. Something else he could do. There just wasn’t a magic wand to make this any better. Traditions and the way it’s always been done crushed many under its weight. There was quite a bit of the way the clan worked he found confining.
“Well think of it this way. If Zoe fails the Culling we’re all dead anyway,” Johnny said with a shrug.
Connor snickered, shaking his head. “You’re always so sunny,” he shot back.
Johnny followed him out to the truck. Abel slapped the bottom of his gun and checked the safety. He slipped it into a holster strung across his shoulders. He nodded at his little brother.
“You got kitchen duty for the old man tonight. Word is he’s supposed to be meeting with the heads of a few families. Keep your eyes and ears about you or I’ll never hear the end of it from Nora.”
Connor slung the backpack over one shoulder and made for the passenger door. A quarter turn left Abel facing Johnny.
“Maybe you ought to jump past control for Zoe and straight into target practice.”
“It’s not that bad,” Johnny scolded.
“Yeah well, it don’t hurt to be prepared,” Abel hit back.
He was of the mind that the girl should have some skill before the clan hunts her down. He’d been searching for a way out. Nora was better at planning and plotting. What Abel had was more of an escape option at this point. A lot of stars had to align for that girl and his brother to skate the edges of this place safe and whole.
A few times with Lorelei in his arms, Abel had the chance to run. Now Abel wished he had. So much had been taken from him because he foolishly threw his lot in with the clan’s. He wouldn’t make the same mistake a second time.
“I’ll be back tonight, probably late.”
Johnny nodded and waved at them as the taillights disappeared into the coming evening. The silence between them was thick and heavy. Abel had a hard time making it through Connor’s landmines. All Abel wanted was peace. He knew full well this conversation would ruin his night. Still, he rushed toward it anyway.
“If you don’t appear…”
“The entire Clan will know I’m in love with a man?” Connor interrupted.
“Love who you want, Connor. Just produce an heir.” Abel was tired of this argument. “Every Kin lives with this decree. Why is it you think you deserve special treatment?”
“So you’ll risk the Merrick name for Johnny but not for me?”
“That’s not fair, Connor. Dad survived this just fine. So will you.”
“Johnny might not,” Connor mumbled.
“Why do you have to make everything so damned hard?” Abel asked.
“Because I want you to work for it,” Conner answered honestly.
For a line that demanded utter loyalty, they sure didn’t pay it much lip service. Yes, his hill was scalable, that didn’t make it any less a chore to climb, though, did it? Connor had half a mind to leave Nora hanging tonight.
Abel pulled up in front of a dilapidated middle-English lodge set tastefully in the woods. He put the car into park and spared a glance for his little brother.
“Think of what this will do to Kylen. Just once, Connor. Do something selfless.”
Connor frowned. He climbed out of the car, silently grabbing the backpack from behind the seat. He pouted. Connor slammed the door and took off up to the house. Abel shook his head disapprovingly. He hit the gas and sped off. Connor turned to face the house.
Cursed to this glamorless existence, he would just have to endure.
25
Chapter
Zoe wiggled her shoulders. She felt self-conscious sitting like this. Not once did the word werewolf conjure visions of meditating in the middle of the pine trees. She supposed given the choices she had this was the better of the two. But yoga didn’t seem all that helpful when it comes to not turning into an inhuman killing machine. At least he wasn’t Ohm-ing.
Zoe had come to the realization that she was a little too good at compartmentalizing. She could lock something away and have it not affect her at all. Surprising. It was one of those talents that helped so much she had a feeling it would come back to bite her on the ass later. But for now, she’d take what she could get.
She sighed.
“Enlightenment will take you more than forty-five minutes,” Johnny said without opening his eyes.
“Yes, Mr. Miyagi.”
He cracked a smile. “You’ve got a while before I can teach you the Crane kick I’m afraid.”
The mirth died away and she heaved another shoulder-moving sigh. “Will this really help?”
Johnny dropped his head to one side meeting her gaze. “It’s an edge in the fight. This won’t be easy, Zoe. But it’s not impossible either.”
“Izobel is sure she can come up with some kind of magic spell or whoseit.”
“Maybe she can. I hope she can. But plan B has saved more asses than you might think.”
“That sounds like something the Big Bad Wolf would say.”
Johnny chuckled at her nickname for Abel. It was fitting. He had to admit. “That’s because he says it all the time.”
“These mosquitoes are going to carry me away. Blood-thirsty savages the lot of them,” she complained swatting at a bug.
“Would you rather we did this in your room?” He asked.
“Oh, I see, inviting yourself to my room already? Huh?”
His face crumbled from zen-like calm to wide-eyed embarrassment. “No!” He coughed. “I mean… that isn’t what I was.”
She laughed. “Man are you easy.”
Zoe got up and wandered over to the pond. Crystal clear, you could see all the way down to the very bottom. A few sunfish plumed its depths. The edges dotted by Lilly pads with frogs sunning themselves.
“It is pretty here. Peaceful.”
She spread her arms wide and spun around beneath the towering pines. Her black hair gleamed blue, slicing through the air. The sight dragged another wistful smile from him. She was beautiful beyond words. He wished he had the courage to tell her.
Zoe slapped at her arm and growled. “If I spend another moment out here I’m going to end up with Yellow fever.” She sneered. “I hate the outdoors. Does that lose me a werewolf merit badge or something?”
“You’re feelings toward the outdoors are still perfectly valid.”
“Well, that’s something at least.”
Zoe offered him a hand. He took it and let her help him to his feet. He breathed in the fruity scent of her shampoo and caught a whiff of the Champaign and sunflowers of her lotion. He’d never experienced anything half as delectable. Johnny followed her up the switchback to the wide back porch.
“So does passing this ritual net me anything? I mean like 50% off at local clothing stores, a free coffee at Starbucks once a month on the full moon?”
He loved her sense of humor. Johnny also recognized the fear bubbling beneath it. “Mostly it’s getting to live. But once you’re part of the clan there are a few perks, I suppose. They make sure you have enough money to survive. Not all of us can go out and work a nine to five. It’s not a handsome sum and some of the jobs are better than others. They’re supposed to be given out on merit. But the reality is family name carries a lot of weight around the Kin.”
“How am I supposed to explain being one then? Do I need papers and a note from a vet?”
Johnny rolled his eyes, laughing. “It’s not unheard of for someone with no family line to be found by a clan. It’s just rarer these days. The Kin population has dropped drastically over the past fifty years or so. We’re not sure why.”
“So what are these jobs, because I feel I should warn you my only skills are this keen fashion sense and a will of solid steel,” she played.
“I can show you a few moves to protect yourself, but if we do, I think you should keep it a secret. Worthington is fond of putting people he doesn’t want to deal with in the soldier category.”
“Soldier? I’m not a soldier,” Zoe exclaimed.
“I know. Don’t worry. This all seems insurmountable now, but Abel and I will keep you safe. We’ll help you get through the transition.” He sighed. “We won’t be able to keep you off every run once you’re on the inside but we can damned sure try.”
The more he promised, the more Johnny realized what dealing with the clan really meant. The reality of it was faceted and varied. There was so much to teach her.
“Run? What’s that?”
“That’s how the clan keeps afloat. They run guns.”
Her eyes went wide. “So not only am I a monster I’m a criminal too?”
The hurt in his expression had her regretting both her words and her tone.
“Johnny, I didn’t mean…”
He swallowed. “I get it. You didn’t choose this. And I’m asking you to take a lot on faith. We’re not so bad. And you won’t be the only one just surviving. There are some violent, psychopaths in the clan. But there are just as many born to it who wish they never were.”
Johnny held the back door open for her.
Even with everything that happened, Zoe thanked her lucky stars for Johnny. He was kind, compassionate, a good teacher and an even better friend. There was no way she’d have gotten this far without him. She didn’t exactly blame him for keeping what she did to her family a secret. Truly, what bothered her was finding out. With the shoe on the other foot, she would have done the same. If only she knew what he was really keeping from her.
She could sense it, though. There was an ocean between them. And she wasn’t sure quite how to swim it. A big part of it was she was afraid to ruin that ease. Transforming it into other emotions was all well and good, but she liked it. She enjoyed the warm fuzzy feelings he drew out of her. She didn’t want to lose them.
We’re always searching for better. But better comes with risks. She kind of wanted to bask. The world had been going at breakneck speeds for her. He slowed it down some. And for that she was grateful. Like a lazy river, the current would eventually carry her to sweeter climes. Zoe just wasn’t sure she was ready to paddle yet.
He wasn’t exactly the only thing she had left.
Izzy hunted her ass down. She came in like a hero on a white stallion brandishing magic like a fiery sword. But that was just it. All their lives Izzy kept secrets from her. All their life she protected Zoe from the truth. Maybe if she
’d known her sister was a bigger badass than Merlin their family would still be alive.
Zoe hated thoughts like that. What ifs and should-haves. Nothing ruins your life more than the picture of how it should be dancing in your head. For now happy wasn’t the word she would use. But it was close enough. She was glad her shipwreck washed onto this shore. Comfortable on this particular beach. Better was a possibility shining in the distance, and that was good enough for her. At least for now.
“Where’s your boom box?” Zoe asked searching around half-heartedly.
“Out in the garage, why?”
“Because it is just too eerily quiet in here. And I feel the only way to truly judge a person is on their music tastes.”
Johnny stepped past her retrieving a sleeve of CDs from the drawer in the sideboard. He handed the book to her.
“Be gentle, a man can only take so much rejection.” With that, he jogged out the front to grab the boom box.
Zoe flopped down on the couch unzipping it. CDs. She hadn’t seen one of these since she was six. What was it with the past in this place? She’d tripped and fallen into a fairytale and wasn’t sure how to get home. She wasn’t even sure she wanted too.
None of them were albums per se. Lots of mixtapes, hand-labeled. That earned him a bonus ten points right there. Mix-tapes had some kind of immortality. The delivery changed over the years as record players turned into radios and boom boxes to MP3 players and playlists. But the concept stayed the same. Romantic.
Zoe flipped through the pages of disks perusing his titles, wondering why these were singled out. What they meant to him. She ran her fingertip down the list of songs through the plastic, protective sleeve. The experience marked points in her pros column.
Johnny wandered back into the room and went about plugging his boom box in. Zoe couldn’t get over how pretty he was. A handsome face and great body were a good start. But what drew her to him was his awkward grace. The way he guided her ever so gently into a new world. He was kind and tender and just a little sad. She liked the taste of that combination.
Aching Silver (House of Wolves Book 1) Page 8