Or so we both thought.
He’d say all these things about the family we would raise. Everyone hated him, and that should have been a sign. Dad thought he was a creep. Mom thought he was a loser for looking for high school girls to date. Bart wanted to beat him up. I was too busy being in love to notice any of the things I should have noticed. Too young and dumb. I was still young but less dumb than before, hopefully. You don’t have two failed pregnancies and walk around the way you were before.
Now that I think about it, there were probably other girls. He was probably fucking someone else all those nights he came home and didn’t want to touch me. He seemed to hate me so much; why was he so mad when I left? I could fucking ruin him, did he realize that? The house in Atherton—what if I did want it? What if I wanted his stake in his company? I didn’t want anything but the Prius that I had driven here in. If I was anyone else, I would have left him with nothing. People thought he was a piece of shit already and Ben, my lawyer, was convinced that a judge would too.
I was convinced that he would find me, but until the time that he did, I had more important things to worry about, like convincing a judge to let me be Nikki and Christopher’s legal guardian. It was likely the closest I was ever going to get to motherhood if my track record with pregnancy was anything to go by.
My options, things I could do, surgeries I could have done and hormone therapy I could undergo would have to come later. Whether it was for the duration of just this deployment or more in the future, Nikki and Chris needed me. It was almost like the real thing. I loved those two.
All people connected with the children would have to be notified that I was petitioning to be their guardian, including Laurie. I didn’t have to do it myself—the court would. Maybe they’d have better luck finding her than we had had all this time. I didn’t have to try and contact her, but I did, as politely as possible in a letter that would go to her house. Chances were she would see it because all her things were still there and to the best of our knowledge, she hadn’t skipped the country. As much as I wanted to hate her, I probably owed her some thanks. She was their mother, but the part of me that wanted to be one too hoped she wouldn’t come back, or at least would be barred from seeing them again. It was because she had left that I was getting to take care of the kids.
If this was the closest I got to get to being a mom, I was taking it.
5
Thaddeus
The more I thought about it, the more it irked me that Bart had asked me to do this. Sure, there was his babysitter who I’d be banging the rest of the summer, but that was beside the point. Who the hell told him I wasn’t deploying.
I wasn’t, but he could have asked. Just because I wasn’t US military anymore didn’t mean I wasn’t doing anything. We didn’t talk too much about what I did when we were together. I would answer his questions if he asked me, but my line of work made him uncomfortable.
I couldn’t understand why, I mean, we did basically the same thing. We were both using the skills we had learned through years of SEAL training for national and international security. His employer was the US military, mine was Constellis, but at the end of the day, both of us had killed and come close ourselves to being killed.
Maybe he asked me to keep me here, so I wouldn’t go back. He’d probably have me flipping burgers than taking another contract. Maybe it wasn’t that at all; he was a good guy, but maybe I was giving him too much credit. He probably just thought he could ask me because I wasn’t under threat of court-martial if I didn’t deploy when asked to.
We did the same thing, but I wasn’t military. I didn’t have to keep military hours, follow their rules or wear their shit. I also didn’t have their protection, security, benefits or any of the other stuff they have in place to protect their people. I didn’t have life insurance, but I also didn’t have dependents. It didn’t matter that much if I died.
Taking the PMC job with Constellis maybe made me a bad person, but at least my motives were honest. You were protecting the interests of your nation when you enlisted but the US and me; we didn’t see eye to eye on a lot of things. Primarily salary. You didn’t get six, seven, nine hundred or better a day when you were with the military, so I went somewhere where I did.
I didn’t have life insurance, but it wasn’t because I couldn’t get it if I wanted it. I didn’t get to use the military commissary, but I had enough saved from working that if I wanted to, I didn’t really have to take another contract again. The trick was investing.
I was sort of mad, but I would let it go because Sugartits at Bart’s house was going to make it worth my while. He’d said it himself; he owed me now. I’d come to collect, sooner or later. I drove over to the house in the afternoon. Bart said he wasn’t going to be home till evening which was perfect. I’d talk to his sister, and I’d cozy up to Sugartits, and I’d be gone before he saw any of it.
Take two. I knocked at the door waiting a little while before someone opened it. It was her.
“It’s you again,” she said. “Bart’s not here.”
“It’s good to see you too. I’m not here for him.”
“Aunt Ron!” the voice was coming from inside the house.
“I’m at the door, sweetie,” she called over her shoulder at whichever one of the kids was yelling for her. I stopped. Wait a fucking second.
“You’re Bart’s sister?”
“Yes, I thought we established that yesterday. Who did you think I was?”
I tried, but it came out before I could stop myself.
“So... which one of you two is adopted?” I asked.
Her jaw dropped. And then she laughed. She cracked up like I was tickling her.
“No one ever has the balls to just come out and say it,” she said. Her smile took me out for a second.
“Oh. I’m right? Is it you?”
“No, it’s him. What gave it away?” she asked. I laughed.
She smiled at me again. Fuck. That had had the potential to go all kinds of wrong, but it didn’t. She had a sense of humor, found my offensive jokes funny, and I wanted to fuck her… was she sure she was Bart’s sister?
“Why didn’t you tell me who you were before?” I asked.
“I thought you knew. He’s never talked about me?”
“Nope. Well, he kept talking about his sister, Ron. Why do you have the name of a creepy, greasy clown?”
“It’s Veronica. Only my parents call me that. If you’re looking for Bart, you’ll have more luck getting him on his phone. You keep missing each other.”
“Nope. It’s you I came for,” I said. I looked her up and down. She noticed and fidgeted, uncomfortable. “Don’t know why he thinks you need my help. You look extremely well equipped to me,” I said. Her cheeks turned pink, and she looked a little mad. I’m not even sorry. You don’t give me a hot girl and tell me not to flirt with her. She opened her mouth to say something, but she was cut off. A kid—the boy—appeared at her side, loudly sipping something out of a tall glass. He looked up at me.
“You’re back,” he said.
“Actually, Christopher, the nice man was just leaving,” she said to the kid.
“What are you drinking?” I said to him.
“Iced tea. You want some?”
“I’d love some,” I said looking at Veronica. “Is your aunt okay with it?”
The kid looked up at Veronica hopefully.
“Aunt Ron, can he come in? Please?”
I stifled a laugh. She melted like butter looking at him. Little dude had her wrapped around his finger. She sighed and opened the door.
“The tea is in the kitchen,” she sighed.
We walked in and went to the kitchen. The house was a lot like mine—more rooms, but pretty standard. Not bad, basically was what I was saying. Pretty good considering it was Navy housing. The second kid—the girl—stared at me from the dining table. Every time I looked up, she had inched a little closer. Her eyes were round like quarters, like she’d never see
n a creature like me before.
“Why do you keep coming here?” Veronica asked me.
“Your brother asked me to keep an eye on you.”
“He asked you to babysit me? God, he must think I’m still sixteen.”
“No. He just asked me to help you out when you need it. With the kids or anything else,” I said. I couldn’t see her nips today, unfortunately, but she was in shorts again. She turned around to grab ice cubes from the freezer, so I could see her ass. Awesome, as I expected. Nice and round, looked like it would be firm when I smacked it. Her legs were smooth and long, but she wasn’t too tall.
“Well, both of you have nothing to worry about, I have it under control.”
The girl kid had made it all the way to the counter where Veronica and I were standing. She was around the corner, along the short end of the counter, so she was hidden from me. Her face only just cleared the height of the countertop, but she was crouched down, so all I could see were her eyes and the top of her head, watching me like she was afraid of being caught peeping.
“It’s rude to stare Nicolette,” Veronica said to her niece.
“What happened to your arms?” she asked me.
“They’re called tattoos.”
“My dad has tattoos too,” she said, popping her head up from behind the counter. “Are you a SEAL like him?”
“Something like that,” I told her. Her aunt was watching us with a look on her face I couldn’t read.
“How do you two know each other?” Veronica asked me.
“We enlisted at the same time. We were in the same class going through training.”
She slid the glass over to me. I took it making sure I touched her fingers as she did.
“You aren’t active duty now, are you? Did you fail out?” she asked smiling. No, I didn’t fail out. “What does Bart imagine I’m going to need your help with?” she asked, crossing her arms.
“That’s the beauty of it. Whatever you need.”
“Even babysitting?” the word felt like someone had exposed my spinal cord and was poking it.
“Are you afraid to spend the night in the house alone? I’m more than willing to offer my services.”
She blushed and bit her lip a little.
“I- I meant the kids. Not me,” she stammered. I smirked, noticing how uncomfortable she was getting.
“They’d be fine if we wandered off for a couple of hours at night,” I said. She gasped softly, and I couldn’t tell if it was because she was offended or turned on. The door suddenly opened, and both the kids scrambled away to greet their father. She used the interruption to pretend she was doing something with the pitcher of tea. Bart walked into the kitchen seeing us at the counter. He looked at Veronica first, and I swear, the guy can smell mischief—like a drug dog.
“Thad, you’re here,” he said.
“Your sister made iced tea, how could I resist?” I said, taking a sip of the tea. It was actually very good. Refreshing.
“You want some, Bart?” she asked him.
“No, I was just heading out again,” he said. “What are you guys going to do tonight?”
“After dinner, we could watch a movie,” Veronica suggested.
“Can I pick this time? Nikki got to choose the last time we watched a movie.”
“No fair, I want to pick!” Nikki complained.
“If you can’t decide whose picking, I’m going to do it,” she said, diffusing the fight. The little high-pitched voices were getting louder, any moment and they would have started screaming—my cue to get the fuck out. “You take turns. Last time Nikki chose the movie, this time, it’s Chris.”
Christopher threw his arms in the air, victorious, sticking his tongue out at his sister. I smiled. What a little shit.
“Are you going to watch with us too?”
It took a second for me to realize the question was for me. Christopher was looking at me, waiting for a response.
“Does your aunt want me... to stay?” I aimed the beginning part of the question at his aunt. He looked over at Veronica. The suggestion went right over the kid’s head, but Veronica’s red cheeks were evidence that it had hit her, right between the legs. Why was she so shy? A piece like that? She had to get creeps like me snapping at her heels all the time.
“Actually, Thad has to leave,” Bart said, looking at me. Oh shit. He was doing this now? Big mistake.
“I don’t have anywhere to be,” I said brightly. “What movie do you want to watch?”
“Hey guys, why don’t we go out to eat tonight? Hm? Ron, could you help them get their shoes on?” he said. I watched Veronica leading the children out of the room; if those shorts were any smaller, her ass would be falling out of them. I looked at Bart, who had just watched me watch his sister walking out of the room.
“You don’t have somewhere to be?”
“I was making movie plans with your sister, but they just fell through.”
“Don’t, Thad.”
“Don’t what?”
“She’s off limits; you can’t date her.”
“Who the hell said I wanted to date her?”
I didn’t have sisters growing up; maybe if I did, I’d be able to empathize with why Bart didn’t want me around her. I hadn’t, and as far as I could see, all Bart was being at the moment was a cockblock. If I hadn’t wanted to fuck Veronica before, I sure as shit did now. Why did he care anyway? It was none of his business.
“I’m serious, Thad. Back off.”
“You’re the one who told me to watch her. Make your mind up, bro. Which is it? Stay away or take care of her?”
“Nope. You aren’t going to play games with her, Thad. No way. You come here when she calls you. Only when she calls you. Understand?”
I narrowed my eyes at Bart; there was something he wasn’t telling me.
“Why? She has a boyfriend?”
“Is that what it would take to keep you away from her?”
“No,” I said honestly. “I hope she does have one. Candy that isn’t yours always tastes sweeter, you know?”
I swear to God, if Veronica hadn’t appeared right then, Bart would have punched me in the face.
“Bart? Oh, you’re still talking. Should I head out with them right now or should we wait for you?”
“Just take them. Pick a place on Fisherman’s Wharf; I’ll follow you guys.”
He was silent until the door closed behind Veronica.
“Stay away from her,” he said coldly.
“Hmm, no. Not when the alternative is so much better.”
“She’d never go for someone like you,” he spat. “What kind of guys do you think she’s used to dating in the Bay?”
“You and I do the same work for different people,” I told him. He scoffed.
“This is the last time I’m going to tell you. We may be friends, but that’s my sister. I’d get a court-martial behind her. Stay away from her.”
The bulk of my opposition came from the fact that he didn’t want me to go after her. Veronica was cute, she interested me, but now she was off limits, and that made me hungry.
I wanted to say it. I really wanted to say it, but like Bart pointed out, we were friends. That was more important than his sister’s pussy, wasn’t it? I remember someone saying to me once that you couldn’t fuck your friend’s sister because it was like fucking your friend; they came from the same two parents and all that.
First of all, I hope that motherfucker broke his back making that reach. Second, Veronica and Bart were not really brother and sister. They hadn’t spent any time in the same womb. Lastly, why didn’t he want me, a person he knew and trusted, maybe a little bit, to be with his sister? At least he knew who I was. I wasn’t just some stranger, hanging around his kids, trying to bang his sister.
I relented. I wasn’t going to fight him over a girl. He was leaving in what? Two weeks? A week and a half? He and I were friends, but I was going to let Veronica make up her mind about whether she wanted a ride or not on
her own.
In about two weeks, he wouldn’t even be here anymore to object.
6
Veronica
When I have kids, I want them to be just like Nikki and Christopher.
When my body finally gets its shit together and carries a pregnancy all the way to term, I want the children I deliver to be just like Nikki and Christopher.
They were literally perfect.
Their little faces, their personalities, their stories and quirks. They were perfect, and they were mine.
Mine as far as the rules concerning legal guardianship went, at least. I had just been appointed a few days ago, and I couldn’t have been happier. The judge, an authority as far as who got to have kids and who didn’t, thought I was fit enough to be in charge of the twins, and that was exactly the win I needed. I would stop thinking of the children as mine one day but not when a judge had just told me that they basically were.
Bart’s own litigation with the custody stuff was going smoothly, but there was still the rub that Laurie was nowhere to be found. He did have the option, however, to have her served by posting or publication, so basically, anyone in Monterey who cared to know, knew Lauren Holliday was losing her kids.
He still had a lot of boring court things to get filed and dates to set that the two weeks of leave were not going to allow him to do. He wouldn’t be able to get full custody of the kids until he was back after his deployment. I was there, but I knew how much he wanted to protect them from Laurie. She hadn’t shown up after all this time, and I was willing to bank on her not showing up later. It wasn’t like she could say the kids were kidnapped or anything. She had left them. If it wasn’t our parents, it would have been CPS who came and got them.
Kids have that way about them where they can adapt to things very fast. Judging from all appearances, they loved Monterey. They loved living with their dad, but his leave was almost over, and they would have to say bye again. He never lied to them about it, making them think that nothing was happening and one day they would wake up and he would just be gone. They had just gone through that with their mom; they didn’t need it again.
Thaddeus (Heartbreakers & Troublemakers Book 2) Page 4