He hated climbing the wall and couldn’t understand Meg’s addiction to staring out over the lost world. She had a sick fascination with what had been, which had never made sense to Jackson no matter how many times she’d tried to explain it. He was someone who liked to look ahead, and to him, thinking about the past was a waste.
Still, when his father had gotten ready to secure the wall, Jackson had made sure that this little section had stayed as it was. Garrett had been hesitant, not liking how easy it was to climb, but had eventually agreed, knowing that anything his son asked for would be working toward the greater good. So the area had stayed and Meg had continued her ritual of looking into the past. It used to only happen once or twice a week, but she had amped it up to almost every night after her dad’s disappearance. Like if she just looked long enough she’d be able to figure out where her father had disappeared to.
Too bad for her, Axl had never left the city.
Jackson hauled himself up, trying not to grimace as the jagged metal dug into his palms. The smashed cars that made up the wall had been subjected to the harsh Atlanta weather for two decades now, and they were starting to show their age. Rusty and dangerous, they were an accident waiting to happen. Not that Meg seemed to care.
He let out a deep breath when he finally made it to the top, but it was more out of frustration than relief. Meg wasn’t there, which meant his climb had been for nothing. He hated wasting his time. He had important things to do and knowing that he’d spent even five minutes on something that didn’t play into his master plan was infuriating. Plus, if Meg wasn’t here, he didn’t know where she was. She would have finished her shift on the maintenance crew a couple hours ago, and Jackson knew that sitting at home right now wouldn’t be something she’d want to do. Her mom’s grip on reality was slowly slipping away, and the further Vivian fell into oblivion, the more terrified Meg became. She wasn’t someone who liked to lose control, and for her, avoiding the situation had been better.
But if she wasn’t on the wall, the apartment she shared with her mother was the only other place Jackson could think to look, so he headed back down and then through the streets of Atlanta. Past shantytown and the foul-smelling air that radiated from shacks. A sneer curled up his lips when he passed the shrine of Angus and he had to resist the urge to kick the woman who was kneeling in front of it. Her eyes were closed as her lips moved in silent prayer. She’d never see the blow coming, and the idea of knocking her right into the statue made Jackson cackle with glee.
He didn’t kick her though, and a second later she had her eyes open and was scurrying away from the Regulator’s son, a look of fear in her eyes that made Jackson stand taller. His smile grew despite the stench surrounding him. There were few things in the world better than seeing fear in another person’s eyes.
When he reached Meg’s building he found the elevator broken. Again. The stairwell was pitch black, but that was a more desirable alternative to the barely working lights on the third floor. They blinked so fast that he found himself wondering if anyone living on this floor had succumbed to seizures, a thought that almost made him laugh again.
He was smiling when he stopped outside Meg’s door, picturing some poor asshole twitching on the floor while the lights above them flashed incessantly. The longer he thought about it, the harder it was for Jackson to hold his laugh in. If anyone ever did have a seizure, he hoped he would be here to witness it.
He managed to rein in his glee as he wrapped his knuckles against the door. The knock echoed through the empty hall, highlighting the silence and making the place seem empty. It wasn’t, Jackson knew that, but for some reason it felt like it was just him in the building right now.
The door in front of him was ripped open and he found himself taking a step back. Jackson hadn’t seen Meg’s mother in months. The family wasn’t exactly a fan of his and the last thing he wanted was to give them any opportunities to pick his behavior apart. It was better to keep his relationship with Meg away from their prying eyes.
The last time he had seen Vivian, though, she’d looked good for a woman her age. She was over forty now, but still fit from years of hard work—something the James family didn’t shrink away from. Jackson admired a woman with curves, which Vivian had in excess. She dressed simply and didn’t wear makeup, but Meg’s mother had natural beauty to her that was impossible to ignore. Her air of authority and self-confidence made her even more attractive, even to someone like Jackson who preferred his women weak and pliable.
The woman standing in front him now, however, was nothing like the Vivian James he remembered. Her hair was unwashed and greasy, knotted into tangles that made it look like she hadn’t brushed it in weeks. She’d lost weight too, so much that her skeletal frame made him shrink away. It was her eyes that really struck him as off, though. They were swimming with fear and confusion as they looked him over, then turned to focus on the hall at his back. They were searching. Searching for what he didn’t know, and he had a strong suspicion that she didn’t either. He knew what drugs they were medicating her with and he doubted that much, if anything, made sense to her these days. If the dosage was high enough she may have reached the point where she was having a difficult time distinguishing her delusions from reality. Soon, with just a little more drugs in her system, she would find it difficult to even stay awake. From there Vivian would either die in her sleep of an overdose or she’d succumb to the paranoia and kill herself, taking care of their problem once and for all. Knowing how strong she was, Jackson doubted it would be the latter. Vivian had survived a lot, and he had a feeling that it would take more than drug-induced paranoia to send her over the edge. No, she would need a push for sure.
“It’s you,” Vivian said, her eyes still on the hall at his back.
“I was looking for Meg,” he responded, trying to keep his tone non-threatening. The problem with the drug they were using was that it made people very unpredictable, and if Vivian were thrown into a sudden flashback of a zombie fight, she could easily lash-out at Jackson.
Vivian looked him over with wide eyes, giving off the impression that she had just now noticed him even though they had already spoken. “She isn’t here. I don’t know where she is, just like I don’t know where Axl is. They took him. Did they take her? Do you know? If anyone knows it’s you.” She took a step closer and lowered her voice to a hiss as she said, “I know who you are.”
Jackson took another step back. “Meg isn’t here.”
He wasn’t talking to Vivian anymore, he was thinking out loud. If Meg wasn’t on the wall and she wasn’t here… He had no idea. She used to visit the guard tower a lot, spending time with her dad or aunt, the JO of New Atlanta, but that had stopped when Axl disappeared. Her only real friend other than Jackson was Charlie, but he doubted that Meg had gone out with her cousin for a second night in a row. It wasn’t like her.
“Where is he?” Vivian hissed, jolting Jackson from his thoughts. “Where is Axl?”
Meg’s mom was glaring at him, her eyes so narrowed that she looked like she was trying to rip his head open with her mind so she could see what was inside. It unnerved him just a little and he found himself backing away. He could take the woman, especially now that she had lost weight, but that didn’t mean he wanted an altercation with her. Not now. Not ever.
“I’ll wait for Meg downstairs. I’m sure she’ll be back soon.”
He turned his back to Vivian and headed down the hall, but she called after him. Yelling. Screaming that she knew who he was and demanding that Jackson tell her what had happened to Axl. Without thinking, Jackson found himself running. Charging down the hall while the lights above him flickered faster and faster, matching the beat of his heart and the pounding of his feet against the floor. He didn’t slow until he’d reached the stairwell, and once he was safely inside and the door was securely shut behind him, he paused to suck in a deep breath. Vivian’s words not only echoed in his head, but also through the air. She was still yelling. Ranting l
ike a lunatic, which was exactly what she was.
After a second, Jackson burst out laughing. He’d just run from that crazy woman. How insane was that? She couldn’t weigh more than a hundred pounds at this point and she was so out of her mind that he could have taken her with little to no effort, but for some reason he had run like a child being chased by a rabid dog. It was pathetic and he was glad no one had been around to witness it.
He was still chuckling to himself as he headed down the stairs to wait for Meg. There was no doubt in his mind that she would be along soon. There was nowhere else that she could be right now, and Meg wasn’t the type of person to wander around. She had a strong sense of family and an even stronger sense of responsibility, so she wouldn’t stay away long when her mom was in such bad shape.
Jackson was wrong, though. The sky turned black and the stars twinkled, and more and more people passed him as they headed into the apartment building at his back, turning in after a long day of work. Still, Meg didn’t come. Minutes turned to hours and it got so late that Jackson was forced to acknowledge the fact that Meg had gone out without him. It was either that or she was hurt and dying in a ditch somewhere, and he couldn’t help hoping that that’s where she was, because if she wasn’t injured and unable to get home, that meant she was in the entertainment district. With someone else. Possibly another guy.
Was Meg seeing someone? He’d been keeping close tabs on her and he hadn’t seen anything to indicate that she was, but he also couldn’t shrug off the memory of how she’d responded to the fighter the night before. The concern in her expression when she’d looked at him, as if he was someone worth saving. Someone worth sticking her neck out for. He wasn’t, and why the hell Meg thought he was, Jackson didn’t know, but he did know that he wouldn’t put up with her slumming it with that asshole convict. No, he wouldn’t sit back and let her get it out of her system the way he had with Colton.
It was late by the time Jackson spotted Meg heading his way, and he was ready to explode. Her steps faltered when she saw him, giving him a moment to take in both her expression and the skimpy dress she was wearing. Black and tight, as well as low cut. She was also wearing heels, something he’d never seen her do before, and more makeup than usual. She’d been out for sure, and whatever she’d been doing, she’d dressed to impress.
Jackson pushed himself off the wall and took one step toward her. “Where the hell have you been? I looked for you on the wall, but you weren’t there. I thought maybe you’d gone home to check on your mom, but she was out of her mind with worry when she answered the door.” A lie, but a small one. She’d been out of her mind, but had barely mentioned Meg. Of course, Jackson knew Meg well enough to know that she wouldn’t be able to just shrug his words off. She’d feel guilty about leaving her mom alone, and she just might think twice about doing it again.
“Charlie and I went out.” The way Meg pressed her lips together gave her away.
She was lying. Jackson knew it beyond a shadow of a doubt and it filled him with so much rage that he almost charged her right then and there. He could picture it in his mind, slamming his fist into her face and sending her to the ground. There would be blood. So much blood. Then he’d take her back to his place and keep her there.
No.
He couldn’t lose control now. Nothing had changed. She’d gone out, but he knew that working on her emotions was the best solution in a time like this.
Jackson swallowed down his anger as he summoned the dutiful friend he’d always been. The spineless prick was buried so deep inside him that he felt like he was dragging him up from the depths of the ocean.
“Why didn’t you call me?” The question was supposed to come out sounding pained, but it didn’t. It was laced with anger and jealousy and a million other emotions that he wasn’t supposed to reveal to Meg, but he couldn’t stop himself. “Who else were you with?”
Her eyes grew wide, but Jackson couldn’t tell if she was surprised that he thought she might be seeing someone else, or shocked that he’d figured it out.
Her next words were lost in the blood that pounded in his ears. Something about how she loved him but she needed space. Space from him. As if she had that right. As if she didn’t owe her very freedom to Jackson Star.
He clenched his hands into fists and took a step toward her, but she held her ground. “Seriously, Meg? I’ve done everything for you! I’ve been patient and understanding. I’ve listened to all your bullshit about how my dad isn’t doing everything he can for this settlement.”
He took another step toward her and she flinched away. Everything else Jackson was going to say died on his lips as he looked her up and down. She looked…scared. Was she scared of him? Even though he knew he shouldn’t want that, he found himself hoping that she was. Fear was the best way to control people, and he wanted more than anything to control Meg.
“Are you scared of me?” he found himself asking.
“No,” she said, but her voice shook and a surge of victory shot through Jackson, but a second later Meg had her shoulders once again squared. “I’m not afraid of you. And I’m not going to let you bully me into being in love with you, either. I don’t know who I want, or if I will ever want anyone, but I know you aren’t the right person for me.”
Jackson’s blood had come as close to boiling as it could without sending him over the deep end. “I’m not trying to bully you.” He wanted to add that if he were trying, she would not only know, but she would succumb to his every whim.
“I know.” Meg reached out, but Jackson backed away, too close to exploding to allow her to touch him. “I want to be your friend, Jackson, but if that isn’t enough for you, then maybe we need to spend some time apart.”
Apart? After everything he’d put up with she was… What? Not breaking up with him since they weren’t even together. Telling him they weren’t friends anymore? How old were they? Eight? No, because when he was eight he hadn’t yet embraced the anger and rage that he now allowed to surge through him. When he was eight he hadn’t yet realized how much potential he had or how far he would go thanks to his father’s position. Now, though, Jackson knew he didn’t have to put up with this. Not from Megan James. Not from anyone.
He turned away from her, not even bothering to glance her way as he said, “I don’t know why I wasted all these years on you. I’m Jackson Star. Who are you? Nobody. You may have the last name, but you don’t have the blood. You’re nothing.”
He walked on, leaving Meg behind him. He was seething; his blood so hot that he thought it might burn him alive from the inside out. He’d spent years on Meg. Been patient and worked hard at keeping his many desires hidden deep down, waiting for his plan to play out to perfection. Now it seemed as if it might come to nothing. She had gone out without him. Something she’d never done. Even with him she rarely did anything social, and going to the entertainment district in that dress could only mean one thing: there was someone else. Who Jackson didn’t know, but he did know that he couldn’t stay or he would do something he’d come to regret.
Jackson made it home without a clue as to how he’d reached his destination. His thoughts were so full of Meg and what he wanted to do to her, as well as questions about exactly what she’d been up to, that he didn’t even remember the walk home. Part of him wished he had, though, because when he stopped on his doorstep he found his insides swimming with the need. It was awake and strong and begging for retribution. He, of course, wouldn’t dare lay a finger on Meg without discussing it with his father, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t have ducked into shantytown and found a whore to take his anger out on. It would have felt good and taken the edge off the need, although at this point, Jackson knew it would take a hell of a lot more to silence it completely.
It was too late, though. It had to be well after two o’clock in the morning and Jackson knew his father would be wondering where he was, so he went inside, hoping the quiet emptiness of the house would ease some of the discomfort swirling through him.
“Where the hell have you been?” His father’s voice boomed through the house less than a second after the door was shut behind him.
For a small man, Garret Star’s voice was deep and even more menacing than his presence was. Which was saying a lot. Not that his father intimidated Jackson anymore. They rarely disagreed and when they did they handled it like men. They had their sights set on the same goal, so there was no reason to butt heads like many fathers and sons did.
“Out.” The word came out harsher than Jackson had meant it to, so he let out a deep breath.
“Don’t raise your voice to me,” his father snapped back.
Jackson gathered up all the restraint he had left and said, “I’m not trying to fight. It’s late. I’m tired and I had a shitty night.”
“Fine.” Garret Star responded, turning toward the stairs. “I met the convict you brought to my house. Honestly, Jackson, I know why you thought it was a good idea, but it wasn’t. His guards are so wasted he could plow right over them, then slit our throats while we slept. You need to think things through a little better in the future.”
Jackson stopped walking. “Shit. I forgot the asshole was here.” Was Donaghy the reason Meg had been out tonight? Jackson didn’t know for sure, but there was a big part of him that wanted to charge up the stairs and beat the fighter until he found out the truth. Not that it would matter. Meg seemed very out of reach at the moment, and beating a man she might have a thing for was definitely not the answer to his problems. “Well, he can go back to Dragon’s tomorrow. I’m starting to think this whole thing with Meg has been a waste of time.”
His father turned to face him, his features hard as stone. “The girl isn’t cooperating?”
Twisted World Series Box Set | Books 1-3 & Novella Page 38