by Lux Miller
The patrons who are milling about, chittering excitedly about what Christmas holds for their family were once high-priced targets that I would scope out and rob blind. Often without them even realizing they’d been had. Now I’m trying to blend in among them when just months ago, I was anything but privileged.
I begin to pace nervously from one side of the narrow walkway to the other, my ridiculously expensive shoes clicking along the concrete. Nobody mentioned it to me earlier, but even a pretty criminal like me can recognize Louboutins. If the red soles weren’t a dead giveaway, the company’s logo scrawled down the inside of the shoe would have given away the secret.
Granted, now knowing that Luca is not just a millionaire, but a multi-millionaire with even more secrets than I originally thought, makes the guilt of accepting such a high-priced gift fade a bit. If he wants to blow his hard-earned money on pricey shoes, that’s his business. It doesn’t stop me from wondering how he earned so much money at such a young age.
Royce implied that this money was legit which eases my greatest fear - that Luca may be a trafficker just like Andre was and he eliminated Andre as competition rather than a business deal gone bad. Luca may be the resident bad boy of New Orleans, but it’s somewhat comforting to realize that even he has morals.
I’m just getting tucked away inside my head as a familiar voice cuts through my thoughts, “If you don’t stop stomping back and forth like a goat, I’m going to be forced to put you out to pasture…”
I chuckle before opening my eyes. Shaking my head, I call him out before I even confirm who’s taunting me, “Dante… if you don’t can it, they’re going to be surgically removing my shoe from your ass.”
Dante shrugs with a smirk. “Meh, add it to the ever-growing list of surgical enhancements I’m being forced to undergo. Just one more turned into three more and just a pin and a rod turned into a complete reconstruction and more down time. Looks like you won’t be teaching me how to surf any time soon.”
I blink at him in surprise. “First of all… you were serious about learning how to surf?”
He nods, a twisted grin splitting his face. “Who jokes about surfing? Isn’t that sacrilege?”
Shrugging, I motion up to the granite that encases the oldest Roman cathedral in the United States. “And yet, I’m standing in front of the House of God where this time last year, I was slipping in and out of the crowd lifting wallets out of the pockets of parishioners. I’m not the best judge of sacrilege…”
Dante gives me a curt nod and nudges me in the ribs with his elbow. “Relax, Emily. Nobody here is going to judge you tonight. I get that it’s a little overwhelming. We don’t attend nearly as often as we should. In fact, we really only attend Midnight Mass. People tend to get a little antsy when the mob starts showing up on the regular. They don’t mind us on a night like tonight, though we still make them nervous…”
I smile and hug him gently, wincing when a hard object digs into my ribs. I glance up at him and cock one eyebrow. “You brought heat to a church? Isn’t it a gun-free zone?”
Dante shrugs casually. “Technically, yes. But let’s just say we have a little agreement with the archdioceses. They may not be particularly fond of the fact that we are armed, but they allow it in exchange for our protection. At any given time, a dozen of our men guard the cathedral. You may have targeted the parishioners outside, but there are criminals in this city who would give their left nut to get a hold of the offerings a place like this takes in. Especially on a night like tonight. Barresi men may be crooked, but we at least have SOME morals… SOME things are still sacred…”
I press my hand against the cold steel that sticks up out of his waistband and raise one eyebrow. “One…” I kick his boot and nod when I hear a faint clink. “Two… and if you’re anything like your brother…” Reaching my hand around him, I slide it across his lower back, smirking with I feel his backup weapon. “...you always have a backup...or two…”
Greedy hands slide around my waist from behind as Luca laughs. “Feeling up my brother already?” I roll my eyes at Dante, then turn around to face Luca. “I’d be happy to stick my hands somewhere else if you’d rather…” Luca shudders slightly, but he plays it off like the wind is cutting through his defenses. “Brrr… that breeze is arctic. Maybe we should go inside before I do something God won’t approve of… forgive my thoughts, Father…”
I glance behind Luca before I realize that he isn’t speaking to Matteo, who’s standing a hundred feet behind us. I watch Luca with fascination as he drags his hands in the motion of the cross and mutters something under his breath. He reaches into the pocket of his jacket and produces a beaded cross that he lifts to his lips and kisses quickly before stuffing it back away into the safety of the pocket.
Stunned, I chew on my bottom lip as he leads me through the immaculate gardens and into the entryway of the ornate church. Lowering my voice, I whisper, “Was that a rosary?”
Luca glances down at me and nods, redness creeping up his cheeks. “I never said I was a good Catholic, but I am a Catholic. When you’re in my line of work, things can get a little convoluted when it comes to religion. I know God doesn’t approve of what I do, but without us, New Orleans would be overrun by…”
I interrupt him before he can finish his thought, “...the likes of me? And Andre?”
Luca stops in the middle of the aisle and stares down at me in surprise. He shakes his head vigorously, “Don’t even put yourself in the same category as that sorry excuse for a man. He raped a fifteen-year-old girl repeatedly because she had no other options. You may not have had a choice, Emily, but he did… he was vile and he deserved to be put down like the animal that he was. I swear it now, with God as my witness, that if the only thing I accomplished by damning my soul was to free yours, then it was a sacrifice I would make over and over again.”
My cheeks flame as I realize that there are parishioners stopped in the aisle behind us, unable to enter the cathedral. I don’t know if they heard everything Luca said, but the mortified expressions on their faces suggest they heard enough. Luca gently ushers me into the back pew of the sanctuary and slides in beside me.
Before long, the sanctuary is buzzing with thousands of murmuring voices and the pew on the other side of Luca has filled with a dozen people crammed onto the elegantly carved wooden bench.
As time wears closer to midnight, a soft prelude emanates from every surface inside of the sanctuary. Its gentle lull draws me to my inner nature to people-watch. The buzzing of excited voices in the crowd clash with the delicate notes of the sweet melody.
Though I’ve never been inside this or any church before, the sheer beauty and attention to detail put my frazzled nerves at ease. Dark wood stands in stark contrast to the soaring painted ceilings and demure blue carpet surrounding the altar. A dozen fifteen foot Christmas trees and brass chandeliers hanging every few feet create an ambience of peace in the cavernous space that is crammed with hundreds of warm bodies.
Sprinkled throughout the parishioners every few feet are men that I instantly recognize. Their posture is stiff as they lean against the walls of the sanctuary, their eyes watching the crowd in silence as the music swells around them. I nudge Luca gently and when he leans down over me, I ask softly, “How many men do you have here tonight?’
Luca shrugs as he closes his eyes. He then replies softly, “Nineteen associates from my personal guard and another three dozen hired on my dime.” I blink at him in surprise and nod my head around the sanctuary. “You have nineteen men in your personal guard?”
He smiles and kisses the top of my head. “Yes.”
I stare at him with an expectant look on my face, but he doesn’t offer any further explanation. I guess that’s another thing to add to my ever-growing list of serious questions I need to discuss with the man. What kind of enemies does one have to have before you need a personal guard that size? I don’t know if the president of the United States even has a personal guard that big.
He turns to face the front as the angelic sounds of a children’s choir echo through the sanctuary, but anyone with eyes can tell that his aren’t focused on the bounty of poinsettias decorating the altar. He claims my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine as a heavenly voice rises above the rest in a soul-shattering rendition of ‘Come All Ye Faithful’ that rattles me to my core.
I’m not Catholic, nor faithful by any stretch of the imagination, but something about the ethereal service moves me and by the time the priest calls for the parishioners to gather for the Holy Communion, I’m brought to tears that cascade slowly down my cheeks. Luca smiles at me softly, but makes no movement toward the front of the church where the herd of people dressed in finery are moving.
He turns to an elegant brunette woman at his side and bows his head in reverence to her, then steps aside so that she can slip past him. He squeezes my hand softly as the woman pauses in front of me, her kohl rimmed eyes appraising me in silence.
After several moments of tense silence, she leans closer to me, pressing her lips to my cheek then switching sides and doing the same. Her voice is husky but warm as she whispers, “Take care of my boy, for I fear that I and God can no longer protect him from his birthright.”
She gives me a quick nod, then slips out of the pew behind the hoard of worshippers before I can reply. Hot on her heels is a carbon copy of her in miniature. Though smaller in stature, her olive skin and chestnut hair leave no doubt in my mind that she’s the woman’s daughter.
She pushes past me with a huff, but Luca’s steadying hand on my back keeps me on my feet. As she reaches the end of the pew, she glances over her shoulder at me and I’m met with a gaze of ice.
She glances at Luca, then down at our conjoined hands and sneers. She rolls her eyes skyward and turns on her heel, her hair whipping around as she stomps up the aisle.
Luca eyes me thoughtfully as I tighten my grip on his hand, inhaling slowly and coercing my pride to take a seat. No woman wants to be shown up by a little girl with a massive chip on her shoulder, but the middle of a Catholic tradition spanning centuries is no place to put the brat in her place. Besides, if my suspicions are correct and she is Luca and Dante’s little sister, alienating myself from her will only make things more difficult for me.
I raise one eyebrow as I notice that neither Luca nor Matteo make any movement to join the rest of the parishioners in partaking in the Holy Communion. Luca leans down over my and brushes his lips against my ear, “Communion is for the pious and pure. I am neither.”
Shivering at his words, I look up at him with a tinge of sadness on my face. He smiles softly and shakes his head. “Don’t feel pity for me, Emily. I made my bed at sixteen years old. God has granted me the clemency to allow me to step foot into His House without striking me down. I shall respect that the Communion be only for the righteous.”
I nod slowly and peer around him, feeling my blood run cold as I meet another pair of cold, hauntingly blue eyes. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I hold his gaze as he narrows his eyes at me. As I feel his stare burning into the very fabric of my being, I grip Luca’s hand harder. He grunts softly, then turns to the terrifying man beside him. The man strokes his hand over his salt and pepper beard before tearing his eyes away from mine and turning his angry stare on Luca.
Luca’s voice is hushed, but I can hear the venom in it as he grinds out, “Father… we discussed this. Have you forgotten? She is a part of my life that you do not get to dictate. I have been a faithful servant and have done things in the name of the family that no man should ever be asked to do. You already own my soul. You don’t get to decide who owns my heart. If you want my continued loyalty, she will have yours…”
My entire body tenses as Matteo’s eyes flash back to mine dangerously. I shift on my feet nervously, but don’t break the eye contact that he insists on holding. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, he rips his gaze away from mine and turns his body so that he’s facing the front of the church as the familiar chords of ‘Joy To The World’ reverberate off every surface.
The congregation swells in volume as everyone joins in on the quintessential Christmas classic and for the first time tonight, I feel like I can truly relax and let myself get lost in the reverie of the Christmas spirit that surrounds me. The air hums with the voices of hundreds of people and I let down my guard and join in, warbling along to one of my mother’s favorite Christmas Carols.
Closing my eyes, I let the music blanket me in a protective shell that temporarily offers reprieve from the raw fear that bubbles just below the surface. Once the services end and the congregation is dismissed, I remain glued to the floor beside Luca, afraid to move. The last thing I want to do is end up in a confrontation with Luca’s father or sister… or worse, him end up in yet another confrontation on my behalf.
He keeps a hand protectively against my back as he guides me out of the church and I realize with disappointment that I haven’t seen hide nor hair or Dante since entering the church. Just as I’m thinking about him, his voice rumbles in front of me, “Better watch where you’re going principessa. Those shoes look dangerous. I have enough holes in me without you adding one to my foot…”
My face shoots up at his attempt at humor and I shake my head sadly at him. “You know Dante… you’re kinda weird sometimes.”
He brings his hand to his chest like I’ve caused him pain. I narrow my eyes at him, but can’t help giggling as the tension that’s had me wound up like a spring floods out of my body. I shoot him a smile and pat his arm. “Don’t worry, Dante. I’m not practicing my clogging in these neck-breakers. Your precious toes are safe…”
He nods and returns my grin. “Good, I’d hate to lose another one…”
I blink at him in surprise and he snorts, “Kidding! I still have all my toes… for now…”
He waggles his eyebrows at me and I shake my head at him in mock sadness. “Dante… sometimes I worry about you. I think you might have a couple screws loose…”
He shrugs and looks at me seriously, but his eyes are full of glee as he retorts, “If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck… it’s probably a duck… or a swan that thinks it’s an ugly duck. Either way… you’ve met my family. Are you really surprised?”
Luca nuzzles his face into my neck and I close my eyes as I try to concentrate on my conversation with Dante. “I met your mother. She seems… reserved.” I bite down on my lip as I remember her pleading words to me.
Dante chuckles and nods. “Momma gave up a long time ago on trying to tame the beasts she birthed. With the way we behave, one would assume we were raised by feral beasts. Especially Noemi. You think Luca and I are bad… whoa Nelly!”
Luca laughs and nods in agreement with his brother. “She got a taste. Noemi was in her usual mood tonight. She’s not always a bitchy little brat, but when she is… she makes a viper look like a cuddly pet.”
I nod slowly and chew my bottom lip nervously. “The sister bites. Noted.”
Luca sighs and nibbles at my neck and Dante wrinkles his nose. “Get a room you two...it’s Christmas for fuck’s sake!”
Luca chuckles and whispers in my ear, “She’s not the only Barresi who’s been known to use their teeth. My religious and familial obligations to this holiday are fulfilled. What do you say we go home and you can unwrap your present…”
Luca slides his hand along my lower back until he’s cupping my ass through my dress. He murmurs, “...and then I can unwrap mine…”
THREE
We may have only been dating for real for a couple of weeks, but even I can tell something is up with Luca. In the short time that I’ve known him, he’s always had this quiet demeanor about himself, but he’s extra quiet on the ride home from Midnight Mass. He’s not ‘crickets chirping in the meadow’ quiet, but he hasn’t uttered more than two words in response to any of my questions since we parted ways with his family. I nudge him gently, patting his thigh with my hand as we ride in the backseat of his car. “A
re you okay?”
Luca jumps like his mind was elsewhere and he zoned out. He looks down at me and I can see that his grey eyes are distant. He blinks and attempts to plaster a fake smile on his face. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just some stuff on my mind. I will say though, that once we get home… you and whatever is in that green box will have my undivided attention.”
I chuckle softly and shakes my head. “What if it’s something totally lame like a pair of fuzzy handcuffs? Royce can be a bit of a cheeky fellow, you know?”
Luca leans down over me, his lips brushing along my cheek. “Then I’ll handcuff you to my headboard while I feast on my midnight snack.”
I roll my eyes at him as I turn to face him, pulling my knees up into the seat so that I am curled against his side. “I could totally go for some popcorn. Do you have one of those air poppers?”