by Wendy Mass
The rest of the morning is a blur. I don’t even bother stopping at the office to request that my locker be fixed. As soon as Leo sees me approach the cafeteria, he motions for me to follow him back down the hall. My friends are going to wonder where I am when I don’t show up at lunch, but I have to do this.
Leo leads me to the end of the hall and pushes open the door to the courtyard that only the gardening class uses. I stop, but he grabs my arm and pulls me outside, letting the door swing closed behind me. Neither of us speak. It feels so strange being here with him. Over the past year I’ve imagined how our first conversation would go a million times, and it usually started with him on his knees begging for forgiveness. He’s not on his knees now, though.
He breaks the silence. “So, um, how’s it going?”
In light of everything that’s happened over the past four days, I can’t even BEGIN to answer that question. I look him straight in the face and do the last thing I ever thought I would if this day came. I burst out laughing.
“How’s it going?” I repeat. I keep laughing until my sides ache and I have to wrap my arms around myself. His face lights up. He starts laughing, too, and soon we’re kneeling on the cobblestones, clutching our sides and gasping for breath. I collect myself first.
“I still … hate you,” I say in between gulps of air.
He nods, trying to get control of himself. “I know. But I think … that we … we …” He starts cracking up again, then forces himself to stop. “I think we have bigger problems right now.”
“We sure do!” I wipe at my eyes. We both lean back on our heels. “But I’m confused about something. Every time I saw you on the second day, you were doing the same things you had done on the first day. Like everyone else.”
“So were you,” he points out. “I figured I was alone in this. And then yesterday when you didn’t show up for the quiz, I couldn’t believe it. I wanted to call you, but I was too freaked out. Then when I winked at you and you made that face, I knew.”
“What face?” I ask, getting defensive.
“It was like you saw a ghost.”
I cross my arms, annoyed. “Well, you would have reacted the same way.”
“Believe me, I’m sure I looked like that when that pop quiz started and you weren’t in your chair. Look, you and I seem to be the only people this is happening to, so there’s no sense arguing.”
“But why us?”
“I’ve been trying to figure that out, but I can’t.”
I look at my watch. “We better get back in there. Stephanie’s going to start looking for me.”
“You’re right. We don’t want to draw any attention to ourselves.” He gathers his books and stands up. “And I don’t think we should let people see us together. It’d be too hard to explain why we’re suddenly friends.”
I stiffen. All the hurt from his mean words comes flooding back. “We’re not friends,” I say coldly, swinging my bag over my shoulder.
“Well, you know what I mean,” Leo says, shifting his weight from foot to foot.
I take a bit of pity on him and ask, “So what do we do now?”
“I think we should lie low,” he says hurriedly, “and do everything as close as possible to the way we did it the first time. Then after our parties I’ll sneak over and we can compare notes. You know, about everything we’ve been through these last few days. Maybe together we can figure out what’s going on.”
The thought of going through with my party again makes me want to hide under a rock. I’m sure his party was great so it’s not much of a hardship for him. We don’t speak as we head back inside. Leo clears his throat as we approach the cafeteria. “Um, just so you know, I’ve felt horrible every day for what I said at our party last year. I didn’t mean any of it.”
Unable to meet his eyes I ask, “Then why’d you say it?”
“It’s a long story. Any chance we can just skip it and be friends again?”
I shake my head.
“I didn’t think so. I’ll explain tonight, I promise.”
I turn to go, but he reaches out and stops me. “Amanda? Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For reading my note and for meeting me. I was really scared you wouldn’t. I just … I …”
I look up to see his eyes fill with tears. For the first time it occurs to me that maybe it wasn’t allergies that made his face red and blotchy those other days. I want to ask him why he was in the guidance counselor’s office. I want to ask him a million things. But for now I just nod.
We stand there awkwardly. I glance down at my watch, then grab a surprised Leo by the sleeve and push him out of the way. A second later the crying Bee Boy throws open his classroom door and flies into the hall. A second earlier and the door would have crashed right into Leo’s head.
“Wow, thanks!” Leo says, eyes wide.
“No problem.” I turn and quickly walk toward the cafeteria.
I can tell, even without turning around, that Leo is smiling.
Chapter Eleven
Humiliating myself in gymnastics tryouts is easier to handle this time. One good thing about being stuck doing this with Leo is that I can cross off “I’m going crazy” from my list of reasons why this is happening. I don’t think people go crazy together.
When it comes time to put on my costume, I’ve thought of a few ways to make it less horrible. I slip on a T-shirt first so the lace isn’t as itchy, and put fresh Band-Aids on my ankles so the shoes don’t hurt as much. When I come out of the bathroom, Kylie’s door is still closed. I haven’t seen her since I’ve been home, which works out fine for me. The warning on the cover of her diary was probably just a bluff, but I don’t want to take any chances. I’m about to head downstairs to greet the first arrivals when her door swings open, making me jump. She’s still wearing the clothes she wore to school.
“Where’s your costume?”
“I’m not wearing one.”
I knew she’d be mad, but I didn’t expect her not to dress up for my party. “But you looked so great in it.”
She puts her hands on her hips. “How do you know how I looked in it? Are you spying on me now?”
I’ve said the wrong thing again. “I mean, I’m SURE you’d look great in it.”
“Well, I’m not wearing it. Thanks to you, this has been a really awful day.”
I’m taken aback. “Me? Why?”
“You know why. All that stuff you said about Dustin liking Alyssa instead of me.”
“Er, but isn’t that true?”
She glares and I back up a step. “I’ll never know because I didn’t ask him to the dance and now he’s going with her.”
“But he was always going with her, right?” Clearly the rules of teenage dating rituals are something I have yet to figure out.
“And then if that wasn’t enough,” she continues, ignoring my last question, “I forgot my science project and my teacher took off half a grade and Dustin’s really mad at me.”
“But that wasn’t your fault,” I insist. “Mom took your poster by mistake. Maybe if she calls your teacher and explains —”
For the first time today, Kylie’s lips curl up into something resembling a smile. It’s the kind of smile you see on the Nature Channel before one seemingly harmless animal devours another. She stomps back into her room and slams the door shut.
I knock. “Aren’t you coming to my party?”
No answer. I guess this is how she’s getting back at me for reading her diary.
Seeing as I know what to expect, I’m not disappointed this time that so many people don’t show up. I try to make the party more fun for the people who did come. We play silly kids’ games like limbo and musical chairs. Dad sneezes into the punch bowl by mistake, and everyone laughs (then Mom takes away the punch bowl). I’m still thinking of Leo’s party, and wondering how it’s going, but this time it’s different. This time I know for sure that he’s thinking of me, too.
When everyone leaves
I don’t wait for Mom’s news. I take the stairs two at a time to get ready for Leo’s visit. I’m so curious to hear what his experiences have been like that I can hardly sit still. My costume rips as I pull it off and at first I feel bad since it’s rented. Then I realize it’ll just fix itself tomorrow! At this point I’d be more surprised if Saturday DOES come than if it doesn’t.
I wait by the window for Leo, figuring he’ll probably climb up the branch instead of ringing the bell. I’m sure he doesn’t want to deal with anyone in my family answering the door. I wouldn’t blame him. He’s not exactly Mr. Popularity around here.
My door bangs open and I jump. We have a knocking rule in our house and someone has just broken it. I turn around expecting to see Kylie, but instead it’s Mom, her face red. She’s carrying a poster under her arm. Usually this is when she’d be telling me about losing her job, but tonight she looks angry. Maybe I should have stayed to help clean up. Before I have a chance to apologize, she says in an even tone, “I know this was a hard day for you. For the first time in your life you didn’t celebrate your birthday with Leo. You normally make such good choices and have proven you know right from wrong. All that said, I can’t imagine why you wanted to sabotage my job.”
My eyes widen and I search my brain for what she could possibly be talking about. “Huh? What?”
She hands me the poster and gestures for me to unroll it. It’s her presentation. “Maybe you’d like to explain to me how this wound up in the outside garbage?”
“What? Why was it in the garbage?”
“That’s what I’d like YOU to tell ME.”
“But how would I know?”
“Your sister told me you knew I had her poster with me at work. There’s no way you could have known about it if you hadn’t switched them. No one knew except my clients. And my boss, of course, who fired me a few minutes ago.”
I sink down onto the corner of my bed. How was I going to get out of this one? I couldn’t exactly tell her that I knew because she told me. Three times!
“Okay, Amanda, you don’t have to tell me. Birthday or no birthday, you’re grounded until you can tell me the truth. I don’t have to tell you how disappointed I am.”
She grabs her poster and leaves my door wide open when she storms out. Kylie peeks her head out of her own room and gives me a wide smile. Grrr! So THIS is how she’s getting me back. I guess I should have taken the warning on her diary a little more seriously!
Fuming, I sit by the window again. Wait till Leo hears about THIS one. I’m still waiting, tracing my breath on the window, when the doorbell rings. I hear Mom clomp over to it and I step into the hall to hear better.
“Um, hi, Mrs. Ellerby. I came over to talk to Amanda.”
There’s a pause — probably from shock — and then Mom says, “Amanda is grounded until further notice.”
“But —”
“No buts, Leo. And you have a lot of nerve coming here. We’ve missed you a lot this past year, you know.”
I can practically see him staring down at his feet. He always does that when he’s embarrassed. “I missed you all, too,” he says, although I can barely make out the words.
Then the door closes with a definite finality. Why oh why did he choose the door instead of the window? I’m about to cross back over to the window when I hear the front door open again. Mom shouts out, “And don’t try climbing that tree! Grounded means grounded!”
I run over to the window in time to see Leo pedaling away on his bike. I can’t believe that after waiting all day, I’m not going to talk to Leo tonight. I put on my pajamas and climb into bed. I can feel the frustration rising up in me. Grounded for something I didn’t do! What a horrible fate! I want to scream that I didn’t do it, that Kylie is setting me up.
But a smile slowly spreads across my face as I stare up at the ceiling. What am I getting so worked up over? In a few hours no one will remember any of this except for me and Leo. For the first time, I can’t wait to see SpongeBob’s freaky streamer arms waving at me in the morning.
Chapter Twelve
And there he is! Waving and smiling, just like always. I jump up and hug him. Mom and Kylie don’t hate me anymore, and Leo and I are in this together! Woo-hoo!
Then it hits me — I forgot to hide the balloon last night! Maybe it really ISN’T still my birthday. I look wildly around my room and grab at the Dorothy costume. I turn it around in my hands until I find where the rip should be, right at the seam of the underarm. I feel all around, but it’s perfectly fine! Woo-hoo, again!
I get dressed and run downstairs. I hesitate for a second at the entrance to the kitchen, where I can see Dad at the counter with his tea. I couldn’t still be grounded, could I?
“Um, hi Dad,” I say cautiously. I step back a bit in preparation for the four sneezes that have greeted me each morning.
“Hi, honey!” he says, and then sneezes on schedule. “Happy birthday!”
I release my breath. All clear. “Thanks! And thanks for the balloon.”
Before he can tell me that Kylie thought I was too old for it, Mom rushes in. “Hi, sweetie,” she says, bending to kiss my forehead. “Feel any older?”
I give her a big hug. She’s not mad at me anymore! “I do, I feel a lot older. Like I turned eleven five days ago!”
She laughs and points to the birthday cake in the plastic box on the counter. “Well, I’m pretty sure if you turned eleven five days ago we’d have eaten that cake by now!”
I want to tell her that we HAVE eaten it, many times, and that it could have used more Oreo crumbles on top, but instead I just smile and pour my bowl of cereal. “Good luck on the presentation!”
“Thanks,” she says, grabbing her granola bar, “I’ll need it. I’m sorry you have to take the bus today, but I’ve really gotta run.”
I turn back to my cereal and then, with a sharp intake of breath, I drop my spoon. It lands in the bowl with a splash that sends milk spraying into my face. “Mom, wait!”
She stops halfway out the door. “What is it, Amanda? I can’t be late.”
I jump up and pull the poster from under her arm. “This isn’t your presentation. It’s Kylie’s science project.” I slide off the rubber band and hold it up. Sure enough, it’s a diagram on how a solid becomes a liquid and then a gas.
Her eyes widen when she sees it. “I must have left mine upstairs!” She drops her overflowing briefcase to the floor. “How did you know?”
Good question. “Um, I saw her leave it here last night?”
She gives me a hug. “You better hurry and finish your breakfast before the bus comes.” She rushes out of the kitchen just as Kylie rushes in. Kylie barely has time to step out of the way. “Don’t forget your poster,” Mom says as she passes.
“That’s where that is!” Kylie says, rolling it back up. I half expect her to thank me but, of course, she doesn’t know the trouble I just saved her. She tucks it under her arm, waves good-bye to Dad, and runs out the back door. Hmm. Interesting. She forgot her lunch. I guess the thing with the poster distracted her from what she would normally have done. I gulp down my juice and then grab both our lunches.
“Bye, Dad! Feel better.”
“Not so fast,” he says, then coughs a few times. “I know for a fact Kylie didn’t leave that poster in here last night. She left it on the coffee table in the den. I brought it in this morning.”
I feel my cheeks grow hot. “Oh?”
“Not that it really matters. A good deed is a good deed.”
“Right! Gotta go.”
“I’ve got my eye on you,” he says playfully, wagging his finger.
“Er, okay, Dad! Bye!” I run out before I manage to mess up again. When I reach the bus stop I hand Kylie her lunch. Now that I know what depths of meanness she’s capable of when crossed, it pays to stay on her good side. Even if she won’t remember it tomorrow.
“Thanks,” she mutters, stuffing the paper bag into her backpack.
We stand in silence.
If I didn’t know her brain was consumed with thoughts of Dustin and the dance, I’d be annoyed that she’s still not wishing me a happy birthday. But when I think about it, on that first birthday she had lost the guy, lost half her grade in science, and still got dressed up for my party. That must mean she doesn’t totally hate me. The bus pulls up and as the doors open, I wish I could find a way to shield her from seeing Dustin with his arm around Alyssa. But nothing comes to me that wouldn’t lead to her figuring out I read her diary.
And I know how that ends.
I want to share my good mood with someone other than an empty seat. So when Stephanie gets on, I stand up and wave so she can’t help but see me. She smiles and then glances quickly at Ruby, who glares at me. I wonder fleetingly if Stephanie is still going to choose Ruby over me. She doesn’t. And even though she spends the whole ride talking about gymnastics and the fun things we’ll do when we’re best friends with Mena and Heather and Jess, I’m still happy that she chose me. Especially since I know that once she makes the team and I don’t, that won’t be the case.
When we get to my locker, I’m about to thank her for decorating it when she says, “Wow, that looks great! Who did it?”
I crinkle my brows. “What do you mean? YOU did it!”
She shakes her head. “No, I didn’t.”
“But you told me you did.”
“Huh? I swear, I didn’t decorate your locker. If you’d like me to take credit for it though, I’m happy to.”