by Helen Ellis
At Murder by the Book, John “Johnnie Cakes” McDougall twirled his cozy rack for me like a diner cake carousel (I bought six). At Blue Willow Books, Valerie Koehler lined the tops of the shelves with jigsaw puzzles (I bought three). At the St. Louis County Library, Laura Benedict gifted me a bookmark that she needlepointed herself (I tucked it into what I was reading, The Godfather). At Thurber House, Anne Touvell gifted me a two-page list of horror movies (of which I have seen sixty-one).
At Lemuria, Ellen Rodgers had a GRL PWR tattoo. At Square Books, a bookseller had a bow finger tattoo. At Avid Bookshop, Tyler Goodson had a temporary tattoo of words that I wrote: “The secret ingredient is never love, it’s mayonnaise.”
At the University of Alabama, a woman won a silent auction to support the Creative Writing Program to have her sister’s name used in this book (thank you, Isbell Hornsby Juntila!).
At Garden District Book Shop, Britton Trice arranged for me to spend an hour in the aura of Julia Reed.
A man wore pearls to the Margaret Mitchell House. A man shouted out an essay request like a torch song at East City Book Shop. A man helped me win a feminist literary version of Heads Up at the Loft’s Wordplay (FYI: when searching a Minneapolis barroom of clue-givers, zero in on Marlon James). A man surrounded me with a roomful of men on the Upper West Side (thank you, Chris Shirley!). A boatful of men offered me ginger ale, seasick lollipops, and barf bags as I puked all the way to the Provincetown Book Festival.
Lynn and John Oldshue bought me a chocolate milkshake before I read at Page & Palette. Susanne Williams and Gerry Howard fed me quiche before I read at Tuxedo Park Library. Ann Patchett fed me her mother’s apricot cake before I read at Parnassus. Ann and Hannah gave me swigs of their margaritas before sitting on either side of me on three tall yellow chairs at the front of a room at Books Are Magic.
On book tour, I missed my husband. As of today, we have been together for twenty-five years. On our first date he brought me a rubber tree plant, took me to see Rosemary’s Baby at the Film Forum, and kissed me on a New York City street. I mean, come on, how do you say no to that? Five months of quarantine and I still can’t get enough. Happy Anniversary, Lex Haris, aka Poochie!
a note about the author
Helen Ellis is the author of Southern Lady Code, American Housewife, and Eating the Cheshire Cat. Raised in Alabama, she lives with her husband in New York City. You can find her on Twitter @WhatIDoAllDay and on Instagram @helenellisauthor.
Doubleday Reading Group Guide
Bring Your Baggage and Don’t Pack Light
Essays
Helen Ellis
As you met Helen Ellis’s childhood friends, what did you observe about the traits that have kept the group together throughout the decades, even though their personalities and experiences are so varied? Did they remind you of anyone in your world who has sustained you with a lifetime of adolescent humor?
When Helen and her friends rallied around Vicki during her treatment for breast cancer, what did they demonstrate about the best way to confront fear, including the fear of mortality?
Helen regales the reader with an appreciation for “characters.” In other parts of the book she shares a more strict view on manners. How do these two philosophies coexist in the book?
Helen offers observations about myriad intriguing sex lives in this book. What are the author’s attitudes about sex and aging?
What would you have said to the receptionist who had never heard of Gloria Steinem in “She’s Young”? Describe a time when you had to explain a person, place, or thing to someone from a different generation.
What wisdom did you glean from the Bridge Ladies regarding women’s health (both physical and mental)?
When Helen explained why she’s scrupulously cautious about technology, did you find this relatable?
When you read about Michelle’s experience in labor, how did you react as Helen gracefully played the role of second fiddle? What truths emerged about the many forms of female friendships that sustain us? What do you predict for Bella Madeline and the world she will inhabit when she is a grown woman herself?
What are the most interesting things you learned about Helen’s family by observing the offerings at the last garage sale? How did her parents shape her sense of humor, and her powers of observation?
If you could host a cocktail party for five people mentioned in “My Kind of People,” which ones would you choose, and why? What do your choices say about your kind of people?
Which lines in Helen’s creed resonated with you the most? Over the next week, jot down your own “I Believe” observations as they come to mind, crafting your personal collection of tenets.
Woven into Helen’s essay on her relationship to bus travel is a glimpse at her relationship with her husband. What does she illuminate about the process of selecting a traveling companion for life?
In what way does Helen’s skill as a poker player reflect her skills in everything else?
In the closing scene, Helen describes making a revision to her body, culminating in her Doubleday chin. What does the book ultimately say about our perceptions of our bodies and the way those perceptions change (or stay the same) as we grow older?
Discuss the book’s title. What are the most significant and most entertaining items in your personal baggage? As she a girl growing up in the South during the 1970s, how was Helen’s history imbued with a particular flair? What are the key elements that shaped your own history? How does storytelling help you carry your baggage?
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