"What if he's telling the truth?"
"I saw the DNA test that confirms Noel was Remi's son, Mila," Roman says, shaking his head. "DNA doesn't lie. There's no way Noel was Francisco's kid."
"He said he was trying to protect his family."
"No," Roman disagrees. "He said he did what he had to do for his family. There's a difference."
"Is there?" I ask, not so sure that's true. Not so sure Roman's right about this. There was something in Remi's voice…a little hint of remorse, like he regrets what he had to do. Like maybe it bothers him to know how much harm he's caused so many people, Roman included. Like maybe he was telling the truth about all of it.
I open my mouth to tell Roman that, but the stiff set of his shoulders and the hard gleam in his eyes has me snapping my mouth closed again. He doesn't believe Remi, and nothing I say will convince him otherwise. He doesn't need me arguing for the enemy anyway. He needs sleep and for something to go right just once.
"It's still early," I say instead. It's still mostly dark outside. The sun hasn't even fully risen yet. "Let's get some sleep. You can figure it out in the morning."
Roman sighs and then shakes his head regretfully. "I can't. I need to get my phone records pulled to figure out where he's calling from so we can start a trace. And then I need to go see Kincaid and check in with Finn before this SWAT thing today."
"Oh."
"You know I'd rather be here with you, right?" he asks like he isn't sure if I know that or not.
"Of course I know that," I promise him, not lying. "I'm not upset with you. I'm just worried about you. You're so busy. You barely get any sleep."
He shrugs, giving me a tired half-smile as he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear and then runs a fingertip down my cheek. "I'll sleep once I find that son of a bitch."
"Can I ask you a question?" I ask Luke, watching him from across the kitchen table.
He jerks his chin in a nod, biting into his burger.
My stomach growls loudly when a bit of juice runs down his chin and he has to wipe it away. I'm eating a salad. It's not nearly as good as his burger, but I'm trying to eat a little healthier. I heard what Roman said yesterday, and I love him for it, but part of me is worried maybe Dr. Farmer is right and I'm gaining too much weight too quickly. I want the baby to be healthy. If I have to choke down a salad every day to make that happen, I'll do it.
"What was Remi Pledger like?" I ask as casually as possible.
Luke's brows come together, his lips pulling down into a frown. He sets his burger on his plate and leans back in his chair, pegging me with a look that's nearly identical to the way Roman looks at me when he knows I'm up to something and doesn't approve.
"I'm just curious," I say, only partially lying. I am curious, but that's not necessarily why I'm asking.
"Remi Pledger," Faith says, repeating the name like she's trying to place it. "Is that the DEA agent who…?" She flicks her gaze in Luke's direction and then quickly away. She's gotten fairly comfortable with him since she's been hanging out here with us, but I think it just dawned on her that Remi's the agent who kidnapped Lillian Riley, and that Luke was the other person assigned to her detail. "Never mind," she mumbles.
Luke eyes me for a long, silent moment like he's trying to decide if I'm bullshitting him or not.
I give him my best innocent look.
He shakes his head, smirking like he sees right through me, but surprisingly, he doesn't tell me no. "Remi's been a cop most of his life," he mutters, taking a swallow of beer. "He's old and salty, but he was solid. At least we thought he was solid," he amends, grimacing.
My heart aches for him. I know that he, like Roman, feels partially responsible for what happened to Lillian, but it wasn't his fault. They're supposed to trust their teammates. They have to trust them to make it home at the end of the day. But I don't think Luke wants to hear that right now, so I don't say it.
"Why do you think he did what he did?" I ask instead. Roman hasn't told Luke about Remi's son and I can't divulge that detail for him when Roman agreed to keep it quiet, but I also can't shake the sense that Remi wasn't lying to Roman this morning about Elijah being Francisco's son. I think Roman's missing something important, but I'm not so sure he's willing to give Remi the benefit of the doubt either. I don't blame him for that. Remi got a lot of people hurt—me included—and Roman isn't ready or willing to forgive that. But if Remi isn't lying, then someone needs to figure out what he's doing. "I mean, it doesn't make sense that he just decided to team up with Francisco one day. There had to be a reason."
"There's always a reason, Mila. But they're rarely good or logical reasons," Luke says, a little growl in his voice. "And they damn sure aren't scrupulous or right. Guys like Remi defect because they're dishonorable, underhanded pricks. They're willing to do whatever they have to do to look out for number one, regardless of who it hurts along the way."
"Preach," Faith says, raising her bottle of water in a mock toast before shrugging at me. Her expression is fierce, stark sincerity shining in her deep honey-colored eyes when she meets my gaze. "Luke is right, Mila. Guys like that don't care about anyone but themselves. When you only care about you, it's easy to convince yourself that all kinds of despicable acts are justified. People do it every day, even when it hurts the people they're sworn to protect."
I open my mouth and then snap it closed again, caught off guard by the powerful emotion that twists her expression into a mask of pain. It's grief and something deeper…some level of loss that makes something grind painfully in my chest. I think maybe she knows better than anyone how easily people can betray those they're meant to protect.
"She's not wrong," Luke says, pulling my attention back to him. "Whatever reasons Remi uses to justify to himself what he did don't really matter. He uses them to make himself feel better about something that should haunt him. That doesn't make them true or right, and it doesn't make him less culpable. He knew what he was doing when he did it, and he knew doing it would get people hurt. He made the decision anyway."
I bite my lip and nod. Luke and Faith go back to eating, but I just push my salad around in my bowl, thinking. Maybe they're right and I'm looking for some redeeming feature in a man without one. Roman told me once that there are evil people in this world. Maybe Remi is one of them, as capable of committing horrific acts as Elijah Noel or Pedro Francisco and for the same reason: greed. I don't know…but I can't shake the feeling that he was telling the truth.
"He called Roman this morning," I blurt.
"Roman told me," Luke mutters.
"He did?" I blink, surprised. I didn't know he told Luke.
"Yeah." Luke shakes his head, his expression dark. Anger snaps in his gaze, turning his sage green eyes glacial. He drops his burger to his plate again and then pushes it away like he's lost his appetite. "Remi's trying to shake Roman up and buy himself some time."
"That's what Roman said too."
Luke nods, pinning me with another of those stern looks. "You should listen to him. Roman's been doing this shit for a long time. He knows what he's talking about."
"I know that," I huff, feeling defensive though I'm not sure why. Maybe because I don't like the insinuation that I'm treating Roman like he doesn't know what he's doing. Obviously he knows more about this type of thing than I do. He's intelligent as hell and damn good at his job.
Luke stares at me for a long moment like he's trying to decide if he should say anything else. Faith's phone chimes before he makes a decision, pulling his attention in her direction.
I glance over at her to find her frowning down at her phone.
"Octavio's on his way," she mutters and then taps out a response to him, still frowning.
I think they had a fight the other day. She came in crying, but wouldn't say what happened. When Octavio came to pick her up that afternoon, she wouldn't even look at him. I don't think Faith is over whatever happened, but anytime Octavio is in the same room with her, her eyes are on him…right up until he looks in
her direction anyway. And then she can't look away fast enough. He lets her get away with it, but it's obvious he's ready to snap. I have a feeling Faith isn't going to know what hit her when he finally does.
"Court must have let out early," Luke observes, gathering his empty beer bottle and his plate. He climbs to his feet and heads toward the sink, dropping his trash in the can.
"Yeah, I guess so," Faith says, her eyes still locked on her phone. A little smile tilts up the corner of her lips and then she flicks her eyes in my direction. Her cheeks flush darker and she bites her lip.
I smile at her but don't say anything, instead going back to my salad.
By the time I'm finished, Luke and Faith have the kitchen cleaned up and Octavio's knocking on the back door. Luke opens it for him. He's dressed in a dark suit that hugs his bulky frame. The blood red tie stands out against the dark fabric, making him hard to miss. As soon as he steps inside, his eyes immediately go to Faith. His jaw is clenched tight, his body rigid with tension. He looks pissed, but as soon as he sees her, the hard glint in his eyes softens incrementally.
"Hey," she whispers, looking at him uncertainly.
"You ready?" he asks.
"Um…yeah." She shoves her hands into the pockets of her hoodie, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. "Is everything okay?"
Octavio jerks his chin in a nod and then turns his gaze on me. "Tell Roman I need to talk to him as soon as possible," he says to me, putting his hand on Faith's lower back and guiding her toward the door. "It's important."
"Okay."
Octavio gives Luke a chin lift and then ushers Faith out without another word.
"Bye," she calls over her shoulder before Octavio pulls the door closed behind them.
"What was that about?" I ask, looking up at Luke. He's staring after the two of them, frowning.
"No clue," he admits and then shrugs like it's not his business. "You should get ready. We need to leave soon." He must notice my confusion because he shoots me an odd look. "You're going with me to this SWAT thing."
"I am?"
"Yeah. Finn's announcing your man as our new Commander. I figured you'd want to be there."
"Oh." Why didn't Roman tell me? I bite my lip, pushing back the little swell of hurt that pricks at me, but I think Luke notices it anyway. "He didn't tell me," I mumble.
"He didn't want you to feel badly about missing it when Faith couldn't go with us," he says quietly. "But since Octavio's home early…"
"I'll get dressed," I say, already moving before he's even finished talking.
His soft laughter chases me down the hall.
I step inside the massive conference room behind Luke a little over an hour later, smoothing down the front of my simple black skirt. Despite the number of men packed inside, my eyes immediately land on Roman. Even though he's on the far side of the room, talking to Finn and another guy, it's hard to miss him. With the exception of Finn, he towers over everyone else in the room. Gone are his usual jeans and t-shirt. Instead, he's dressed in his formal Class A uniform. The fabric of the uniform stretches across his wide frame, hugging his muscular body to perfection. He looks so damn handsome my breath catches in my throat and heat pools low in my belly.
As if he feels my eyes on him, he turns and scans the crowd. Those piercing blue eyes land on me, lighting up. Tension drains from him, a broad smile stretching across his face. He murmurs something to Finn and then strides in my direction.
I keep my eyes locked on him…right up until a familiar face appears in front of me, stealing my attention.
"Brady!" I practically squeal in delight, flinging my arms around his neck. "What are you doing here? I thought you were in Arizona. How's Carla? How's Sebastian? Congratulations on the new baby! What are you doing here?" I haven't seen Roman's former partner in weeks, but I'm thrilled he's here today. I know Roman will be too. Brady is Roman's best friend, his brother in all but name. They worked as a team for years before Brady resigned.
Brady laughs and wraps his muscular arms around me, squeezing gently. A big smile stretches across his face, showing off the little dimple in his right cheek. "They're good, doll. And I'm here to see your man get promoted. You're glowing," he says and then kisses me on the cheek.
"Get your hands off my girl," Roman growls from behind him, though there's a smile in his voice.
"No can do. We're making plans to run away together." Brady shoots me a wink.
Roman ignores his teasing and nudges him aside before pulling me toward him. "You're here," he says, those gorgeous eyes of his roving all over my face like he can't believe I'm here. The proud smile on his face makes my heart race
"Luke told me what was going on," I whisper when he places a sweet kiss on my lips.
"Didn't want you to feel bad about missing it," he mumbles.
"I know. But I'm here now, and there's nowhere else I'd rather be."
He touches his forehead to mine in gratitude before stepping back and pulling me into his side. He holds a fist out for Brady to bump. "Damn good to see you here, brother," he says and then repeats the fist bump with Luke.
"A little birdie told me what was up since you were just going to leave a brother in the dark," Brady says, shooting Roman a dirty look.
"Didn't know you were back in town, man," Roman says, smirking at his former partner. "Last I heard, your ass was in Arizona where you're supposed to be."
"Had to come see this shit for myself," Brady says, a grin overtaking his handsome face. "You're really brass now, huh?"
Roman shrugs a shoulder.
Brady clasps him on the shoulder and squeezes, genuine happiness shining in his dark eyes. "I'm proud of you. You're a pain in the ass, but you were born to lead this team and everyone knows it. It's about damn time you stepped up to the plate."
"Truth," Luke says, earning a fist bump from Brady. "We were all taking bets on how many times Finn would let him tell him no."
"Too damn many," Brady mutters.
I blink, looking between the two of them and then at Roman. "You've been asked to take over SWAT before?"
He jerks his head in a nod.
"Oh. Why didn't you take it?"
"I couldn't leave this jackass out there by himself," he says, jerking a thumb in Brady's direction.
"Man, fuck you." Brady flips him off, though he's smiling ear to ear.
My brows furrow, a frown tugging at my lips.
Roman notices. He tips my face up toward his. "I didn't want to risk the safety of the team by working undercover and trying to lead SWAT at the same time. Their Commander needs to be someone who can be visible and step up when needed. I couldn't do that and maintain my cover at the same time," he says quietly.
I nod, not really surprised by his answer. Like I told him, he puts everyone else first. He'll never admit it, but he's just like Talia…a mother hen. It eases my mind a little to know that this isn't something he just decided to do on a whim though. Part of me was worried that he only took the position to keep me safe, but the look in his eyes makes it obvious this is something he's thought a lot about. "I'm proud of you, Roman. I hope you know that."
"I know," he says, his expression somber. He tips his head forward like he's going to kiss me, but Finn interrupts before he can.
"Mila," Finn says, pulling me in for a big hug. Like Roman, his uniform stretches across his massive frame, barely containing the bulky muscles beneath. He's a monster of a man. He's also really sweet…though Roman tells me that's just because Finn likes me. I think he might be right. Finn's all cop. He's maybe eleven or twelve years older than Roman, but he has a lifetime of experience and has earned the respect of his guys. He's tough and expects a lot. He's also not afraid to do what needs to be done.
I admire him and I know Roman does too. I also know that Roman is going to be an incredible leader. How could he not when he learned from the best?
"How's that baby doing?" Finn asks me.
"She's good." I smile widely, amused at the way
his eyes light up. Finn and his wife never had kids, but I think he would have made a great father. Every time I see him, he asks about the baby. I think he's as excited that Roman's going to be a daddy again as Roman is.
"Is this big bully treating you right?" he asks me, nodding in Roman's direction.
"He is," I promise, laughing when Roman grumbles a protest and Luke and Brady laugh at him. "He's been very good to me."
"Good," Finn says and shoots me a wink. "Because I'm pretty sure half the men in this room would be willing to take his place if he doesn't treat you like the treasure you are."
"There's not a chance in hell that'll ever happen," Roman growls, dragging me back into the hard wall of his chest.
Finn just smirks at him and then slaps him on the back before turning to say hello to Brady and Luke.
"You going to stick around after to fill out your paperwork?" he asks Luke.
"Yes sir," Luke says, nodding.
"Good." Finn checks his watch. "I'll catch you after this is over with and we'll get it done."
"Sounds good."
"I'll give you a minute before we start," he says to Roman, heading toward the front of the room.
"Octavio come and get Faith early?" Roman asks Luke.
"Yeah, I guess his case got called early," Luke replies.
"Octavio said he needs to talk to you as soon as possible," I murmur to Roman, leaning back against his chest.
"I'll try to swing by to see him later." He slides one hand around my waist, splaying it over my belly in a possessive hold. Despite the room full of his coworkers, or maybe because of all the men milling around, he presses an equally possessive kiss on the side of my neck, making me blush.
"How many of your SWAT team members are here?" I ask, trying to distract him from glaring at everyone.
"All of them," he says like he's surprised.
"Really?" I glance around the room with more interest, trying to pick out the members of his team. There are maybe two dozen other people in the large room. Most are dressed casually like Luke and Brady, with a few in their formal dress uniforms like Roman and Finn. Everyone mills in groups, chatting back and forth. Quiet laughter rings out from a couple of groups. Others are more subdued. But regardless of where my eyes fall, they're all standing at attention, like they're more than capable of shifting from easy conversation to deadly aggression in the blink of an eye.
Desire Me (Her Best Friend's Father Book 4) Page 16