“Yes!” I blinked and everything looked clear again, nothing was hazy. Even though my head was clearing, I still was ravenous for Cole. My heart thumped wildly in my chest while his long fingers slipped in and out of my wetness. The tender way he touched me was tugging on my heart and before he even penetrated me I was crying.
“Do you want me to stop?” He asked, catching his breath. I shook my head and locked my legs around him tight. “Good. I don’t wanna stop.” Fuck, he was driving me insane. I should have been mourning the beginning of the end of my marriage but instead I was wrapped up in Cole. He was giving me exactly what I craved.
My fingers worked hurriedly to free his thick dick. I stroked it in my hand while he finger fucked me and the sensation was amazing. “Fuck me, Cole. Please.” My words pulled a deep rumble from his chest. He buried his cock so deep into me that I squealed. “Oh my god!” I wrapped my arms around his neck because I wanted to meld into him. He felt like salve to my wounds. “Cole…” I whined, tears spilling down my cheeks. He pushed into me again and stayed there so he could look at me.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said quietly. I tilted my head up so I could kiss him while he drilled into my pussy. I clenched around him, feeling his hard dick slide in and out slowly, bandaging my broken heart. I lifted my hips to meet his strokes, pulling and tugging on his cock with each motion.
“Cole…” I moaned into his mouth and he bucked into me harder. Tears snaked down my face and into my ears. Cole wiped them away and lowered himself so that we were chest to chest. He kissed my collarbone gently while I uttered his name so softly anyone else would have had to strain to hear.
We weren’t fucking. We were supposed to be fucking. We were making love.
It was as if we both realized it at the same time. He kissed me and I dipped my tongue into his waiting mouth. We both came so damn hard. My walls tightened around his girth and he shot into me before he could pull out but it felt so fucking fantastic that I didn’t care right then. He stayed there inside my cunt until his cock stopped pulsing. When he slid out, he looked down at me and I saw a mix of emotions in his eyes. Mine couldn’t have looked any better.
“What the fuck was that?” He muttered, rubbing his face.
“We uh…we just…”
“We just fucked up,” he groaned. “Goddammit. See, this is exactly why I didn’t wanna fuck you. I knew it would be just one time too many and I’d mess around and…”
“Fall?” I asked quietly. His phony anger faded instantly as he nodded. I leaned over and he kissed me deep and slow. “Cole, we can’t get wrapped up in this shit.”
“I know. You don’t think I know that? I’m not trying to be like Xavier.” That was his number one damn fear; that he’d end up in love with me for an eternity like Xavier.
“We know better,” I sighed. “But Jesus that felt so good. I needed that.”
“Shit, so did I.” He pulled me on top of him and let his hands roam freely. “I forgot how addictive your pussy is.” My fingers splayed out over the tattoos on his sculpted chest.
“And I forgot how deep your dick can go.” I was unhinged and it was all Emmanuel’s fault. I was going to fuck whomever I wanted, whenever I wanted and there was nothing he could do to stop me at this point.
Cole’s dick stiffened beneath me and even though we shouldn’t have, we fucked again. He had a love hate relationship with the way I rode his cock. I made him cum in mere minutes but it was such a mind-blowing feeling that he couldn’t get enough of it.
After we had our fill of each other, I lay in his arms drifting off to sleep feeling soothed for the moment. I knew it was only a matter of time before I woke up and heartache set in again. I’d rest for now though. There was no doubt in my mind that Emmanuel would come by later on and I’d have to stare my heartache right in the face.
**
Chapter Eleven
Emmanuel
My entire fucking day was an utter blur. Faces, conversations, and meetings ran together like muddled watercolors. Through it all, I saw Lana though. I hated her, but not nearly as much as I hated myself.
I had to leave my own house knowing whom Camilla would run to in her moment of pain. Knowing she would fuck Cole and their bond would deepen even more. It would be worse than her and Xavier because Camilla and Cole were best friends before anything else.
Seeing her crumple like a fragile paper doll broke me into a million pieces and I couldn’t even offer her a solid reason as to why I was fucking Lana. I barely knew myself. The only thing I could tell my wife was that I was compelled to screw this other woman. I was compelled to touch her and feel her. That wasn’t a good enough reason though. Camilla deserved me groveling at her feet for the shit I’d done, and I would do it if I knew it meant I’d get her back.
I was packing up to leave my last stop for the night and Lana was in tow behind me. The explosive click of her heels on the floor made me irrationally angry. I spun to face her with a glare. “Do you have to walk so fucking loudly?” She drew her head back and looked at me as if I’d grown horns.
“How should I walk, boss?” She frowned. Her hair was brushed back in a ponytail after Camilla tore out a nice chunk of it from the middle. Her face was also oddly swollen because of the one blow Camilla got in before I pulled her away.
“Quietly.” I turned back around and continued to the truck where a driver was waiting with the door open.
“Governor Scott.” He nodded at me and I smiled politely before getting in. Lana slid in beside me and I could barely contain my fury. I didn’t know why I was getting ready to lay into her when she wasn’t the only one fucking up.
“You need to find another job immediately, Lana. This isn’t going to work. I should have just realized that shit from the start.”
“Manny, don’t be like that.” She sighed and touched my face but I snagged her wrist in my hand, moving her away from me. “Ouch, you’re hurting me.”
“Good.” I let her go and she rubbed the sore spot with a pout.
“You sure seemed to like what we had going on. Now all of a sudden your wife finds out and I have to find another job?”
“Yes. That’s exactly what I’m telling you. I should have never stuck my dick in you in the first goddamn place. I was so stupid,” I laughed and shook my head. “You have nothing on Camilla. Literally nothing. Nobody does. She’s my everything.” My head felt clearer than it had in weeks as I watched the palm trees zip by. Lana made a noise in her seat and crossed her legs. “If you don’t want to die, I’d suggest you leave the state as soon as possible.” I wasn’t opposed to her dying but as a courtesy, I thought I’d let her know the kind of monster she was up against with Camilla.
She knew she didn’t have to kill me in order to watch me die though. All she had to do was be with another man after my ring was on her finger. Not even another man, but Cole. Xavier I’d almost expect at this point and I might even be able to accept it and move on. I couldn’t accept Cole and just move on though. His hold on her was deep. It was just as deep as mine but the only element missing was sex. Constant and emotional sex from both of them.
Pretty boy had fucked up the trust between him and Camilla so as much as she loved him and cared about him, she would never let herself fall for him blindly again. She trusted her best friend though. She trusted him with her life. Fucking someone with that kind of attachment is dangerous. I had to get back home.
“Cancel all my appointments for the remainder of the day,” I said to Lana.
“What? Why? You still have to sign several legislations and meet with the people from the new hospital.”
“You heard me, Lana. Do what I said.”
“Look, Manny you’re not thinking straight. All this shit has you blinded by your emotions.” She cracked open a Gatorade for me and pulled out the food we’d gotten before leaving my last stop. “Eat something and get your energy up. Stop getting so bent out of shape. Officials fuck their assistants all the time. What makes yo
u any different?”
Her arrogance was infuriating. I’d never hit a woman in anger before but she was pushing me there. I chose to ignore her while I ate and drank. I grabbed my phone and sent an email to Cole to have her terminated as soon as humanly possible. Then I called Camilla.
I was more than shocked when she actually answered. “Cami,” I swallowed nervously. I’m never ever fucking nervous and it’s because I figure out every possible outcome and plan accordingly. I couldn’t plan for the shit that was happening with Camilla and I though. I didn’t know what she’d do or where her mind was. She was the only person in the world who could bring me to my knees.
“What?” She snapped coldly.
“Look, when I come home tonight I want to have a serious talk with you.”
“Fine,” she sniffled.
“Camilla, you okay?” I could hear Cole’s voice on the other end. He sounded close. Too motherfucking close.
“Yeah Cole, thanks. Can you get my robe from over there in the closet? I’m cold.” They were in our room. Cole and Camilla were in our goddamn bedroom and she wasn’t wearing anything. Rage clouded my head instantly and I wanted to kill Cole with a bullet right to the fucking head. I could hear movement on the other end and it made my skin prickle.
“Camilla, how’s your head?” I asked for more reasons than one.
“It’s perfect.” She said with bite, letting me know that Cole had made her feel all better. I shut my eyes against the images playing in my head. I was going to kill him. I said a silent apology to Dempsey before opening my eyes.
“That’s good. Can you see if Trev and Laurel will keep the kids for a little while longer until we sort through this?”
“What is there to sort through, Emmanuel?” I didn’t know what to say to her but I didn’t get the chance to say anything because she ended the call. There was so much to sort through. Mainly I wanted to tell her that I was sorry. I wanted to hug her and never let her go. I wanted to kiss her fucking feet and tell her how idiotic I was for being so compelled to fuck some simple bitch that meant nothing.
She meant nothing. Then why the fuck was my skin buzzing while she was kissing my neck? I blinked and looked to see Lana climbing into my lap. We fell into a long kiss and I pulled her hair. She had my dick so hard I couldn’t concentrate on how fucked up I felt for hurting my wife. I couldn’t concentrate on anything but wanting to fuck Lana.
“See? You don’t wanna stop what we have going on, do you?” Her voice was sultry and sexy in my ear. I shook my head and gripped her waist firmly. “We’re so good together, Manny. I can take care of you.” She spun her words in a way that drew me in and made me want to listen. Why had I told Cole to terminate her? She was such a good assistant.
“I can’t hurt Cami,” I muttered against her cheek.
“She’ll move on though. I want you so much. You and I could be so much better than you and her.” We fell into another kiss and it was hungrier than before. I was filled with the need to feel her, to be inside of her.
“Lana, I have kids. I can’t abandon my family,” I spoke the words but they didn’t sound strong. I didn’t sound like myself at all. My heart felt like it was beating a million miles a minute and if I didn’t fuck Lana I thought I’d die. “Shit, I wanna fuck you so bad right now.” I started tearing her clothes off while she giggled. She slid her pussy down on my cock and I groaned in ecstasy.
When I shut my eyes, I saw Camilla, but when I opened them Lana was the one rocking her hips around, grinding into my dick. She leaned over to kiss me and I nibbled on her full lips. “I wanna make you cum, Manny.” She rubbed the side of my face as her ass bounced up and down.
“Oh, you will,” I told her. She was so skilled at making me blow my load it was like she was a professional.
“I want you to cum inside of me.” Her words barely registered because they morphed into moans. Her pussy was so slippery and wet and it felt so good wrapped around my dick. I dug my fingertips into her ass and made her move even faster on top of me. We crashed together and over and over until I couldn’t contain my climax. I came inside of her warm, wetness and instantly regretted it.
“Fuck!” I cursed from both the sensation and the realization. If Lana got pregnant, it would surely be the end of Camilla and I.
**
How the fuck was I supposed to face Camilla knowing I'd just fucked up again with Lana? I walked up to the house trying to steady my breathing. Cole’s car was in the driveway so I had to brace myself for anything I might see walking in.
The house was silent. I could hear the hum of the refrigerator and the swooshing of the dishwasher, and upstairs I heard talking. My feet carried my up the steps as I shed my suit jacket and loosened my tie. I was getting increasingly hot the closer I got to my bedroom.
The door was standing wide open and luckily for everyone involved Cole was sitting on the couch and Camilla was on the bed, scrolling through her phone. Her eyes jerked up to mine immediately. “Cole, can I talk to Emmanuel for a moment?” Her eyes were bloodshot and her face was puffy. She’d just gotten finished crying. My heart twisted.
Cole glared at me and stood to his feet. Even though he was tall, I still stood above him by a couple of inches. “I’m out here if you need me, Camilla,” he said while staring me down.
“Okay, thanks.” Once the doors to our room closed I swung my eyes around to my wife.
“So, you’re fucking Cole now?” I laughed bitterly.
“Last I checked you were too busy being scratched up by your baldheaded assistant to notice or care what the fuck I’m over here doing.”
“Camilla, can we talk?”
“I’m listening, Emmanuel.” Her arms were folded tightly. She may have been listening but she wasn’t accepting.
“I’m so sorry for hurting you. I love you more than life. You have to know that. I don’t know what is going on with me but it’s nothing you’ve done. You’re perfect and you always have been. You and the kids mean everything to me.”
“Then why did you ruin it?” The tears in her eyes glistened and made her eyes look even brighter.
“I don’t know! I wish I fucking knew. I wish I had an easy response. I wish I could say it was because I had great conversations with her or she gets me or she sucks my dick so good I can’t think straight but none of that is even true. It’s true for you but not for Lana. It’s like an itch I have to scratch and I know it’s a piss poor excuse. I know. It’s the only way I can explain it though. I get around her and something snaps.” I felt like a bumbling goddamn idiot trying to explain something so ridiculous to Camilla.
“So maybe you should just be with her then. I mean you just have this uncontrollable urge to be with her, right? Let me help you out. Go be with her, Emmanuel. Be with her for as long as you can before I get my hands on her.” The smirk that crossed her lips turned my blood to ice. I never told Lana not to come by the house in the morning. Maybe I should just let Camilla loose on her and end it all.
At least I wouldn’t feel that awful, involuntary need to fuck her anymore. “You have to believe that I’m not trying to hurt you. I swear. You know me by now, Camilla.”
“I thought I knew you. Now I’m questioning everything. You were supposed to be my happily ever after, Emmanuel! You’re not better than Alexander or Xavier. The only person who has never fucked me over is Cole.”
“Is that why you’re screwing him now? In our bed? In our house?”
“Do you seriously think you have any ground to stand on right now?”
“Camilla, whatever is happening right now…it’s not me. I can’t explain it.”
“You sure seem to be at a loss for words. Let me help you. You’re fucking your assistant because you can. Plain and simple. You’re a disgusting asshole who’s just like all the other motherfuckers that hurt me…and…and…” Her words melted into tears and she could barely get them out. “…Walked all over me like I wasn’t shit. You know what though? You’re worse than Xavie
r and Alexander. You made me feel safe first. You gave me babies and a wedding and a ring and…” She sobbed and I felt my own eyes burning with emotion. “You made me happy. You made me think I would actually have a chance at happiness then you ripped it all away just because you knew you could. You were my hero. You saved me so many times only to crush me.”
I went to her. I couldn’t help myself. Seeing her in so much agony was killing me. I wrapped my arms around her and she struggled against me but I wouldn’t let her go. I couldn’t. “I hate you!” She screamed with pain cracking her voice.
“No, you don’t. Don’t say that, Cami.” I sniffled and pulled her in closer. “I love you so much. I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry. I just want to make it better.”
“You can’t…” She shook her head. “How can you make this better? I’ll never trust you.” She cried on my chest and I shut my eyes against her words. They hurt too much to hear.
“Don’t leave me. I can fix it,” I told her. I felt like a child. I felt vulnerable and exposed but I didn’t care. I’d strip all my armor for Camilla. I’d give her the world on a platter.
“I’m tired of being hurt.” She shrugged out of my embrace and looked up at me with red, wet eyes. “I’m so sick and tired of being hurt.”
“I will never hurt you again,” I told her honestly. I could see her studying my eyes and I hoped she knew I was telling the truth. “I already set it up for her to be fired. She’s gone as soon as possible.” I wiped her tears and she turned away from my touch. It was killing me. When she wiped her own tears, I noticed the pale strip of skin where her wedding band used to be. I thought I’d shatter.
“Cami…your ring?” I held her hand in mine. “No. Don’t take your fucking ring off, Camilla. Please don’t do that,” I begged her.
“What does it really mean anymore?” She sniffled and tried to compose herself. “You need to leave. You can come by and see the kids tomorrow morning. I don’t want to see you though.” I stared at her for a long while then nodded my head. I had to give her space. I had to allow her time to hurt and lash out. I knew her. I knew how she operated when she was broken hearted. I’d seen it so many times. I never thought I’d be the culprit though.
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