by Gail Haris
“You look very pretty, koritsi.” Ma beams. Yia-Yia shrugs and goes back to peeling potatoes.
“Beautiful. Come on, let’s go ahead and get going.”
Ma, Yia-Yia, Jolene, and I walk outside. I jog over to knock on Bianca’s condo door. They come out and we start walking toward the church. Jolene leans closer to me, “Shouldn’t we take the car so Yia-Yia doesn’t have to walk to the church.”
I whisper back, “Don’t let her hear you say that. If we’re walking, she’s walking. Besides, she’ll argue that there’s no need to waste gas for such a short distance. She may have a walker, but she could probably outlast all of us. It’s only a block.”
When we arrive at the church, I tell Jolene that women and men sit on different sides. Her eyes widen, but Bianca takes her hand. “You can sit next to me. I don’t speak Greek, either, but don’t worry. We’ll just stand and sit whenever everyone else does.”
“I really like Bianca,” Jolene whispers to me.
Jolene
When the service has ended, everyone scatters. I scan for Jimmy, but turn to find I’ve now lost Bianca. A beautiful woman approaches me and makes a point of looking me up and down. She speaks a few words in Greek. I smile and shake my head, “I’m sorry. I don’t speak Greek.”
She laughs, but it’s not sweet at all. It’s definitely a bitch laugh, and she continues to speak in Greek. Two other women join her and now they are all laughing. They nod in agreement to whatever it is she’s saying.
I don’t have to take this shit. I turn to walk around her, but she side steps in front of me. I’m about to slap the bitch out of my way when Jimmy runs up. “Jolene.”
The Greek bitch in front of me plasters the most ridiculous smile on her face. “Yia, Dimitrios.”
“Yia sou, Pamela.”
She begins speaking to Dimitrios in a completely different tone than the one she used for me. Oh, so the bitch just leveled up. Now I’m pissed. I cross my arms and narrow my eyes. So she thinks she can use Greek to exclude me. Well, let’s see how she likes it when I use English to exclude her.
“Jimmy, I’m not too crazy about this woman and would like to leave.”
“I’m not too crazy about you either, American,” Pamela now speaks in perfect English. Like proper English. She raises her chin and smirks.
“If you know English, then why did you speak to me only in Greek? Too much of a coward to say it to my face so I’d understand you?”
“No. I’ll tell you.” She takes a step closer, invading my space. “I was just saying how it’s ridiculous that you don’t even know the language of your people. That is, if you really are Greek. And how is someone like Dimitrios slumming it with the likes of you? He could do so much better.”
Jimmy shakes his head, “Stop. Let’s go.” He takes my hand, but I jerk free.
“You think you’re good enough?” I look her up and down exactly how she did to me.
She smiles wider. “His family seems to think so. I already have the approval of his mother—something you obviously do not have.”
Jimmy steps between us, “But I don’t. Pamela, just because Thea Maria and Ma are trying to play Cupid doesn’t mean anything. I chose Jolene. I brought her here to be with me. Not to be set up with anyone else here.”
I peek my head from around him and smirk. “Looks like the only approval I need is his. And I’ve got it. Face it, Pamela…I doubt he’ll be inviting your kolo to America.”
Jimmy looks up to the ceiling and makes a cross. “Jolene, we’re still in church.”
I look up to see Jesus’s face looking down on me. I make the cross like I’ve seen everyone else doing and say a silent prayer for forgiveness. When in Rome, right? Or, should I say, when in Greece. Jimmy tugs my hand and mumbles, “Let’s go, Jo, before we get kicked out of the church or lightning strikes us down.”
I turn and give Pamela a wave, making sure my engagement ring is in clear view before we exit the building.
As we’re walking to the house with the others, Jimmy has us hang at the back of the group. “I’m sorry about Pamela.”
“That was what you were worried about, wasn’t it? Why you asked me to accompany you here? I mean, we were kind of expecting it.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t like seeing her talk to you that way.”
“It’s okay.”
“Well, we’re about to be in for another treat. Father Giorgos, or George in English, is a little different. He’s kind of crazy, but he’s a likable guy. Just be prepared.”
“For what?”
Jimmy sighs. “Anything and everything. He is going to bless our union.”
We step into the condo and go to the kitchen. I make myself busy helping set the table and pouring glasses of wine and water. A knock at the door has Martha running to the door. I hear her voice loud and clear as she welcomes the priest into the house. Everyone bows and kisses his hand, so I do, too, when he comes over to me.
I have no idea what he’s saying to me, but his eyes are kind and his smile is sincere so I just smile and nod. Jimmy comes over, beaming, and then tells me to have a seat. We all sit as Martha places the food on the table. Father George blesses the meal and then we begin placing food on our plate. For the most part, all the conversation is in Greek. Which is fine with me, I can focus on eating and less on conversation that I know nothing about.
“You are a very lovely woman, Jo-lene.”
I look up, shocked that the priest just spoke in English to me. He gives a little high-pitched laugh and then coughs. “’Scuse me. You see, I studied in America many, many years ago. My English not so good now, but…” He holds up a single finger and taps his temple. “I still remember some.”
“Where in America did you study?”
“Boston.”
“Wow. Did you like it in the States?”
“Oh yes, yes. I had always hoped to return but ah, what are you going to do? Time waits for no one. You remember this. God wants us to live life and give life. I think you and Dimitrios will make wonderful babies.”
Excuse me, what? Babies were definitely not part of this scenario.
Jimmy releases a nervous laugh. “Papas, forgive me, but how does you going back to America relate to us becoming parents. We’re not even married.” Jim leans closer to me and takes my hand that’s resting on the table. He kisses my knuckles and whispers. “Yet.”
Lying in front of a priest seems to be a whole new level of wrong. I ease my hand from his grasp and refuse to meet his eyes. I look at the priest and try to smile.
“More importantly, we’re not–” I stop short. “Not ready to get married… right away.”
Father George does his little high-pitch chuckle again. He points a finger at Jimmy. “You’ll marry her soon. You smart boy, Dimitri.” He reaches over and pats Jim’s cheek. “You’ll marry this woman. And then you’ll plant your seed many times over. I know this.”
Dex starts coughing and Bianca downs her wine in an attempt to not burst out laughing. Those traitors. Yia-Yia is making a cross, and I can only assume praying…hopefully for me and not praying that I drop her grandson like a hot rock. Martha is staring wide-eyed, looking back and forth between me and Jim. I pray that this conversation is over…but alas, my prayers go unanswered, probably because I didn’t do the cross-thingy on my chest, because the conversation is far from over.
Father George stares intently at me across the table. “Dimitri is a good man. He is a good farmer. Let him tend to your garden and bury his seed deep for many years to come.” He cuts up a piece of meat on his plate and then points his fork laden with a big chunk of meat at me. “Have you been baptized?”
“Um, yeah. When I was younger in the First Baptist Church.”
“That’s okay, my child. We baptize you here, so you marry Dimitrios in Greek church. Now, let us pray.”
Dear God, I pray for strength to get through the rest of this week.
Jolene
“We only have a few days left.” Jimmy stands in m
y doorway. I’m reading on my bed with the balcony door open, a light breeze blowing the curtain. “Time really flies when you’re having fun, huh?”
“Oh yeah.” I turn the page. “I’ve gone from a fake relationship, to a fake engagement, and now apparently a baptism is in my foreseeable future, along with a Greek wedding and you tending to my garden.”
Jim laughs. “Come on. We don’t have time for all that.”
I tilt my head. “Are you sure about that? You seem to work pretty quick.”
“I mean – there’s always time for plowing, but not sure I can even get a Greek baptism and wedding in. Those are pretty big events.”
“What have I gotten myself into?” I mumble.
“I promised you before that I’d take you to a romantic destination. So, how about tomorrow morning we hop on a ferry boat or take a puddle jumper over to one of the islands?”
I set my book down and turn on my side. “You don’t have to do that, Jim. I’m having a nice time.”
“You don’t have to lie. I’ll go book us some tickets for tomorrow. We can stay away for a few days, I mean, you’ve endured so much already. Or are you afraid to be alone with me? Scared you won’t be able to resist my charms?” He wiggles his eyebrows and walks out before I can come up with a quick retort. Resist his charms, ugh. At least those are days I won’t have to worry about running into little sirens and a priest who might try to baptize me.
I hear a noise outside my balcony and head over to see what it is. Martha is hanging the laundry so I walk outside to join her and pick up a towel. “Can I help?”
“Sure.” She keeps working. We’re silent for a long while. I know Yia-Yia isn’t fond of me, but I get the impression that Martha isn’t crazy about me either. She’s just less vocal about her disdain. Wearing my sassy pants this morning, I decide what can it hurt, I’m never going to see this woman again probably, so I have to ask.
“Martha? Have I offended you?”
“Yes.” She keeps working. I wasn’t expecting blunt from Martha.
“Are you going to tell me how?” I pick up another towel and pin it to the line.
“No.” She shakes another towel and pins it.
“I can’t make things better if–”
She throws a towel down and turns her dark eyes on me. “You want to know why? Fine. I tell you.” She shakes her finger at me. “You no love my son. You’re with him and because of that, he can’t find real love. If you love him, fine. But I’m not okay watching him look at you the way he does, but you no look back. I love my son. He’s my only boy. I want to see him happy and in love. Look me in the eye right now and tell me under God’s eye that you love him?”
“What makes you think I don’t love him?”
“The way you acted over what the priest said. The way you don’t return his touches. I see everything. I only want what’s best for him.” She stomps away from me at that final word.
Bianca walks out onto the balcony from their connecting condo with Georgina in her arms. They look out over the ocean and I feel like I’m intruding on a sweet moment between them. As I turn to go back inside, I hear, “Jo! Hey, we were just about to go down to the beach. Would you like to join us?”
“I don’t want to interrupt your family time…”
“Nonsense. Besides, you’re engaged to Jimmy, so you’re practically family. He’s never even had serious girlfriends, so you must be pretty special.”
Special cover up. “Well, alright then. I’ll meet you all downstairs.”
I throw on my swimsuit, a cover up, and grab a towel. Ma and Yia-Yia immediately stop speaking when I pass them in the kitchen. You were speaking in Greek, it’s not like I understood anyway so it was pointless to stop talking, I want to say, but I offer a single wave as I hear them mumble kolo again. Jesus, I’ll never live that down. A swim will do me good, both mentally and physically, though…and hopefully help me relax. When I walk out the door, Dex, Bianca, and Georgina are waiting for me. Dex has his shirt unbuttoned and his amazing abs on display. No wonder Georgina is absolutely the most gorgeous baby ever. Just look at her parents.
We walk down to the beach, and I throw a towel on a chair. I’m taken by surprise when little Georgina reaches for me.
“Do you want to hold her?” Bianca asks.
“Sure. If that’s alright?”
“More than alright. I’ll be able to actually apply my sunscreen.” Bianca hands me Georgina, but Dex grabs the sunscreen instead.
“I’ll be happy to oblige. You’ve had your hands full. You relax while I get me a hand full.” She laughs and blushes. He’s definitely a charmer, just like Jimmy is.
Jimmy? When did I start using his nickname? Must be something in the air.
Dex immediately begins rubbing sunscreen on her, and it’s slightly awkward for me. Especially when Bianca releases a little moan. Okay. Time for me and little Georgina to find something to distract ourselves with…preferably down near the water. I walk a little ways and sit down on the warm sand with Georgina on my lap. I begin making a pile as the waves come in, just enough to wet the sand nice and good, and her chubby little hands smash it. She giggles and claps, so I do it again.
“She loves it, Jo. I think she’s really taken a liking to you.” I don’t look back, but I can hear the smile in Bianca’s voice.
“I’ve taken a liking to her, too! She’s absolutely adorable.” I give Georgina a little hug before I go back to making another pile for her to smash. This is the relaxation that I needed. The simplicity of making a baby giggle is medicine for my soul that I didn’t know I needed.
“Want to join me for a swim?” I hear Dex ask Bianca. She hesitates, so I turn around to look at her.
“You two go have some time for yourselves. We’re fine.” I look down at the happy little baby on my lap, “Aren’t we? Yeah? We’re having fun, aren’t we?”
Bianca laughs as she stands up. She and Dex take off into the water, giggling and splashing each other like teenagers. A few minutes later, a shadow looms over me and Georgina. I look up to find Jim watching us.
“Bianca left you alone with Georgina?”
“Yes…why?”
Jim sits down next to me and tickles Georgina under her chin. “She never leaves her alone with anyone. Must say something about you?”
I roll my eyes. “We’re not really alone, Jim. They’re right there.” I point to them as Bianca climbs on to Dex’s back laughing. I smile, but it doesn’t reach my eyes. “That’s what love looks like.”
“Yeah, they’re pretty crazy about each other.”
I look to Jim, “Have you ever been in love?”
He keeps his eyes on the ocean when he answers. “In the Greek language, there’s different words for different types of love. I’ve experienced some forms of love, but the kind you’re describing…no.”
I notice a difference in his eyes. They’re not playful and full of mischief anymore. No, now they’re sad. I reach over and take his hand and give him a squeeze. “My friend’s tell me that my Mr. Right will arrive someday, so I’m sure your Mrs. Right will too.”
Jim gives a humorless laugh. “Unfortunately for you, you’ve got to deal with this arrogant Greek bastard until then.”
I quickly cover Georgina’s little ears. “Sshh, a child is present.”
He laughs, “She’s not even talking yet.”
“Geek Bas-ard”
Oh no, no, no! This is bad! “Jimmy…did she just say…”
“Hey…you called me Jimmy.” He grins widely.
I roll my eyes. “I’m more worried about what name she called you!”
“Geek Bas-ard!”
Jim shushes her. “No, koukla mou, Greek mustard.” He nods. “Not bas–”
“Jimmy!” I hiss.
“Mustard,” he continues.
She giggles. “Greek…” Jimmy nods encouragingly. “Greek bastard!”
Of course, right then, Bianca and Dex would walk up. They could’ve swam for another t
en minutes but nooooo. Dex grins proudly, “Is Georgina speaking her first word?”
Bianca beams and kneels down. “What is it baby? Did you say Ma-Ma?”
“Greek bastard!” I cringe when I hear the sweet little voice speak. To my surprise, Bianca jumps up and swats Dex’s arm.
“I told you to watch your language! I knew she was listening when you yelled at that driver.”
“He cut me off!”
Jimmy and I look at each other and give a single nod. We’ll be taking that little secret to the grave for sure. I hand Georgina back to Bianca. Jimmy and I stand together. “I wasn’t for sure if that’s what she was saying.”
“Yeah, it just came out of nowhere.” He shakes his head as he feigns disappointment. “What are you teaching your child, you two?”
Bianca fusses over baby Georgina, encouraging her to say Ma-Ma, but it’s useless.
“Greek bastard.”
“We’re gonna go now,” Jimmy says as he throws an arm over my shoulders. I nod in agreement.
As we walk away, we both burst into a fit of giggles. Instead of removing his arm, Jim wraps the other one around me. Without words, he brings his lips to mine and I welcome them. When he pulls away, I smile…an authentic, genuine smile.
“I’m really glad to know it wasn’t my fault her first word was Greek bastard,” he whispers.
“I doubt you helped matters any by repeating it twice. Mustard…is that even a thing in Greece?” I start laughing again.
He shrugs like what’s a guy to do and brings his lips back to mine.
“I’m really glad to hear you call me Jimmy.” He gives me a sweet kiss on the lips. When he pulls away, he leads me toward the condo. I look up to find Yia-Yia watching us. I give a little wave, but she continues to just watch me. They said her eyesight is really bad, that she certainly couldn’t see anything at a distance, but something tells me she does…and that, like Martha, she sees everything.
Martha walks in the living room all excited. “We are going to have family over tonight. Maria is coming and she’s bringing a few other friends we haven’t seen in years. Along with her goddaughter, Pamela”