“I don’t know. He is nice, but…” She rubbed her fingers together.
“Something seemed a little—odd about him.” August lazily flicked a bit of magic at the fire, sending it snapping higher.
“You think so?” Tonya said, glad that she wasn’t the only one overthinking everything.
“It could just be nerves from reuniting with a long-lost niece who everyone thought was dead.” Diane smirked.
August shrugged, lacing his hands across his chest and tapping his thumbs together. Tonya didn’t really think that was it either. There were also the looks that Birgir and Lilja had given Steinn. Like they don’t really trust him. And Birgir said some people very close to Freyr didn’t approve either. Steinn or my grandparents? She rubbed at her arms.
“How do you feel about him?” Dorian asked. She settled her gaze on him, half-wishing that he wouldn’t always ask the direct questions. She leaned her chin down on her arms and lifted a shoulder in a shrug.
“Maybe it’s reuniting with an uncle I didn’t even know existed and appears to actually want to get to know me.”
Diane leaned against her shoulder for a moment. “He tell you much about your father?”
Tonya flicked a finger up against her nose to ward off a sniff.
“He did.”
She couldn’t bring herself to say more than that. Freyr had sounded like everything she would have wanted in a father. And the one constant in any discussion about her father was the fact that her parents had wanted her.
She blinked hard. She hadn’t even realized how much hearing that from someone who actually knew both of them would heal the ragged bits of her heart.
Tonya tilted her head back to look up at the stars glittering sharply on the other side of the ice panes in the ceiling.
“How do you get to the stars from the land?”
“Find the star path beginning from the highest mountain in Celedon Forest,” August said.
“From the lake that reflects the purest night sky.” Dorian shifted to lean back and better look at the stars. “How do you get to it from the ocean?”
Tonya stared at scattered stars linked in a bright constellation. The Running Bear.
“We follow the fastest current to the place where the sky meets the sea and enter into the Creator’s Halls,” she murmured.
A soft sigh broke from Diane. “It sounds so easy, and so beautiful for faeries. Being able to just leave the world and walk to the Creator’s Halls without dying first.”
She tilted her head up, firelight flickering over her features, finding the sadness that lingered in the shadows.
“We can still die.” August didn’t break his stare from the sky. “But getting through the Halls of Death to the stars isn’t easy.”
“How long do you think it takes to find your way through the Halls?” Tonya asked, tightness filling her chest.
“I don’t know.” Raw understanding filled August’s voice. “When my brother died, I made myself a promise. That if I died, I’d find him in the Halls and we’d go together.”
Tonya squeezed her eyes shut for a long moment. “I’m afraid he’s left this world.”
“I hope that they’ve found each other and have made it to the stars.”
“My father always said that death never really separated anyone. That they were always just waiting a little out of reach. And that if you really loved someone, they’d be there waiting when you died.” Diane’s voice hitched and she sniffed.
“I like that.” August’s voice was rough.
“Me too,” Tonya agreed in a small voice. She looked at Dorian, who had yet to say anything. He still stared up at the stars, jaw tense.
“Dorian?”
He inhaled quickly and looked at her.
“You all right?” Diane asked before she could. He nodded, his tension obvious.
“Sometimes it’s hard for me to still believe in all that,” he finally said. “My father left. He was one of the ones to first go rogue. He tried to get me and Endre to go with him. I couldn’t. Endre did, until he saw what they’d really started doing to humans and to our people.”
His hands clenched against his legs.
“Is that why you became a healer?” Tonya softly asked.
He nodded imperceptibly. “One day after a battle, I just couldn’t pick up my staff anymore. It made me sick. So I turned to healing, hoping to try to undo some of the damage.”
He paused for a long moment. “We’re taught from birth that the Creator put us on earth to protect and nurture, so I couldn’t figure out how He allowed faeries to turn like that, to do those things.”
“When you figure it out, let me know?” August said wryly.
Tonya didn’t know what to say. They’d all lost something. Her to something unknown, and them to the shared experience of the war. All left with questions that might not find any answer.
A soft gasp from Diane made her blink.
“Look!” Diane pointed up.
A flicker of light shot across the sky. Tonya held her breath. Another followed. And another. Ribbons of green and blue and purples darted across the sky in quick succession, leaving a green aura in their wake.
“The Creator’s Lights,” Tonya murmured in awe.
They watched in silence, the glimmering light finding its way down to dance off their faces. The lights came slower and less often, fading completely and leaving the stars to shine brighter in their absence.
Tonya dabbed at her cheeks, embarrassed, until Diane sniffed next to her. Lilja had said that they carried the Creator’s magic with them to earth. After seeing them, it was easy to believe.
“This entire trip might have been worth it just to see that,” August said.
Tonya swallowed hard. There had been a short message from Birgir, that they were still discussing ways to undo the warding. Dread had dogged her all evening, whispering that it could never be undone and the ice would stay forever.
Or until she died.
Her heart stalled. What if that was the only way to undo it? Would they agree? She glanced at her companions, still sitting in silence around the fire pit.
No. They never would.
She felt silly for even thinking it. “I think I’ll go to bed. It’s been a long day.” She pushed to her feet, extending her hands once more to the warmth of the fire. Will I feel cold if the warding is removed?
Murmured “good nights” were returned. Dorian reached out to touch her hand as she passed his bench.
“You all right?” he asked, his voice barely audible, but concern loud in his eyes.
She smiled, her heart thudding in a different way. “I’m fine. Just tired.”
She forced herself to walk away. Now, more than ever before, she couldn’t let herself get attached. She was already the half-breed faery, the outcast, and she couldn’t tangle Dorian up in that.
But now she’d be known as the faery who destroyed an entire continent. Dorian, August, and Diane deserved to be able to walk away from her shame. Soon she’d get the final answer that there was nothing to be done.
*
“There might be an option,” Birgir announced the next morning.
Tonya nearly spit out her tea.
“What?” she said in unison with her companions.
They sat around a large table in a dining room somewhere in the castle. Tonya had barely paid attention to where they were going, swallowed up in the fear of the expected answer. Lilja and Steinn also sat at the table, along with a few other faeries who had been introduced as members of Birgir’s council.
Birgir tipped a slight smile at their reaction. “As you already know, there isn’t anything that we can do to undo Freyr’s warding. We consulted Steinn as well, thinking maybe that his magic might be similar enough, but it appears not.”
Tonya pressed her hands against the table, wishing he’d just get to the point.
“You saw the Lights last night?”
Tonya nodded.
“They to
uch down on the furthest northern tundras, where they pour the Creator’s magic into the earth for all of us to use.” Birgir leaned forward. “They could undo the warding.”
“What do you mean?” Tonya whispered, glancing between Birgir and Steinn. Her uncle had a thoughtful look on his face.
“The Lights contain pure, unfiltered magic, untouched by any creature before it soaks into the ground,” Steinn’s gravelly voice picked up. “If you touch it, they will wipe away the warding, and any other magical working on you.”
Wiped away.
“What about my magic?” Tonya asked.
“Your magic will be fine. Probably enhanced for a while after touching them.” Lilja offered a half-smile. “There’s not much out on the tundras. Not even animals. It’ll be a safe place for your magic to be released.”
Tonya pressed her fingertips harder against the table. What if her ocean magic decided to unleash itself and reveal itself as deadly as her ice magic? She could drown Konungburg if she wasn’t careful.
“When do we leave?” August paused from his food long enough to ask.
“Steinn has offered to take Tonya,” Birgir said. “We’ll put together an escort. The journey there will take two days, and it’s not an easy trip.”
“It might be easiest if you three stayed behind,” Steinn said.
“No.” Dorian and August spoke at the same time. Diane looked up, ready to argue as well. Warmth spread down to Tonya’s toes.
“We started this together,” August said. “We’re going.”
“Sounds like you have an escort, Steinn.” Birgir chuckled. Faint disapproval tightened the corner of Steinn’s mouth, but he nodded.
Tonya sent a small smile of thanks at the boys. August tipped a lazy wink back. Dorian’s eyes softened and she forced herself to look away after a glorious moment.
“When can we leave?”
“Tomorrow morning will be best,” Steinn replied. “It will take some time to prepare for the trip. The nights will be cold out in the open and we’ll need enough supplies to get us there and back. And King Birgir didn’t clarify—it’s two days by caribou. You’ll have to spend some time today learning how to care for your own mounts and how to ride.”
Diane and August were the only ones who looked pleased about that.
“We won’t need anyone else to go along with us?” Dorian asked.
Steinn shook his head. “I’d only planned to take along two other faeries anyway. There isn’t much danger from anything but wild animals, and I’m well equipped to deal with them. I think you are as well.”
He looked to August. The younger faery eyed him for a moment, as if seeing him in a new light.
“The animals here speak a little differently than I’m used to, but it shouldn’t be hard to translate if I need to,” he said.
Steinn nodded. “Good. The hardest part of the journey will be the hills we have to cross to get to the tundra. The ice will make it more treacherous, but the caribou have sure footing. There should be nothing else to worry about.”
A breath of relief escaped Tonya. Something could be done. A sudden horrible thought struck her.
“How do you know when the Lights come back? What if it takes weeks, or—”
It was already two days longer than she wanted, but what if it stretched into days too late?
“Not to worry,” Lilja said. “The Lights come nearly every night.”
Tonya wilted back into her chair. There was a way to undo the warding, to access her magic. She could figure out a way to undo the ice later. Or ask one of the numerous ice casters sitting around the table.
“Then that’s settled.” Birgir thumped a hand on the table. “I’ll oversee the preparations myself.”
“That’s not necessary, Your Majesty,” Steinn began, but Birgir waved him off.
“Anything for Freyr’s daughter.”
Tonya returned his smile, warmth shooting through her. It couldn’t even be dimmed by the small frown of irritation that quirked Steinn’s lips.
Maybe she’d also get a chance to know her uncle better over the next few days and help him make a convincing case to go meet her grandparents. Maybe even stay? She set her mug down, surprised by the thought. So far this place has been more accepting of me than the Reef ever was. But would I truly be welcome to live here?
Diane and August laughed over something, drawing her attention back to the table. She’d be welcome in Diane’s house, she knew that. Would be welcome back in Csorna Hold. With Dorian? Her cheeks heated again. No. It’s better to part ways with him after this.
“We’ll head down to the stables after breakfast,” Steinn said.
Tonya nodded her agreement, her excitement fading away into nervousness. There were many things which still fascinated her about the land. She wasn’t sure learning how to ride the antlered beasts was one of them.
But she had no choice if they wanted to make good time to the tundra. She was the last to finish eating. Her appetite had been non-existent that morning, and had yet to return with the promise of riding lessons. She drank the last of the tea and followed the others from the room.
Steinn led the way through the wide corridors and staircases out into the crisp air. Tonya paused on the top step, tilting her head back to the sun that seemed a little closer, and inhaled deeply of the pine, and salty bay, and wild tang of magic swirling through the air.
“You look at home here,” Dorian said as she opened her eyes.
He’d hung back to wait for her while Diane and August walked with Steinn, already pestering him with questions from the mildly-irritated look on his face.
“I feel more at home here,” she admitted. “Maybe my ice magic is stronger than my ocean magic? I just—don’t know why anyone would want to leave here.”
He nodded slowly, his eyes sweeping across the view of the valley the castle steps afforded. “You should go out to the bay as well. It’s the place where both of your magics meet.”
Tonya turned her attention out to the dark waters of the bay, chunks of ice bumping into each other with each gentle sway. Seals basked on the furthest point of the bay, their honking conversation audible with the shifting wind.
“Would you go with me?” The question burst from her.
A smile tugged at his mouth. “Of course.”
“That’s if I survive trying to ride a caribou.”
His smile turned to a wince. “Glad I’m not the only one dreading this.”
Tonya giggled. “Let’s get it over with. Going down to the water sounds infinitely more interesting.”
They hurried to catch up to the others. Diane half-turned to catch Tonya’s gaze, wiggling her eyebrows in a ridiculous question. Tonya rolled her eyes and turned her nose up in the air in a pointed refusal to rise to Diane’s teasing. Diane snorted a laugh and looped her arm through Tonya’s.
The stables were long, low buildings of grey stone, sheltered by the castle’s bulk from the worst of the winds that swept off the bay.
Steinn flagged down two faeries in grey tunics edged with red.
“Ingvar, we need some caribou for a short journey to the northern tundra tomorrow. But they will need to learn to ride and care for them today.”
The older of the faeries nodded, rubbing a hand through his dark hair that lacked the white tips.
“All new to riding?” Ingvar asked.
“I’ve ridden horses,” Diane supplied.
“I’m experienced with horses and pegasi,” August said.
Tonya shook her head. Ingvar tipped a smile at Dorian’s long-suffering expression.
“I think I’ve got some animals that will suit the four of you just fine.” He beckoned them into the stables.
The sweet scent of animals and hay greeted them. Gentle lowing crooned from the corners. Antlered heads emerged over carved stall doors to watch them with curious brown eyes.
Ingvar walked beside the stalls, murmuring back. A few of the caribou looked at them in more interest.
<
br /> “Niko.” Ingvar opened a door and a large male caribou stepped out. Ingvar pointed down the mow and the caribou trotted off.
Ingvar kept walking, opening three more doors for a female and two bulky males. “Raakel and Ransu are siblings.” He sent a male and the female off. The last male stretched its head out to curiously sniff at Dorian.
Dorian held out his hand and the caribou butted it with his nose, sliding his cheek along Dorian’s hand to present a furred ear to be scratched. Ingvar slapped the caribou’s rump. It jumped and trotted off with a snort of irritation.
“Arvo will be yours,” Ingvar told Dorian. “Be warned, he likes attention a little too much.”
“I noticed,” Dorian remarked dryly.
Ingvar and his companion stopped only to load them up with saddles and bridles and brushes before following the path the caribou had taken out into the arena behind the stables.
The caribou waited patiently, except for Arvo who knocked his antlers against Niko’s. Niko snuffled and butted him back a pace until Ingvar clicked his tongue and they ceased. Arvo made a beeline for Dorian again, sidling closer and keeping one eye on Ingvar and the other on Dorian as he rubbed his chin against the faery’s arm.
Tonya stifled a giggle. Dorian rolled his eyes and rubbed under the caribou’s chin as Ingvar began a basic lesson on grooming.
Nearly thirty minutes later, after fumbling her way through saddling and bridling Ransu, she wobbled precariously along with his rocking walk around the arena.
“Just relax a little,” Diane said, looking disgustingly at ease on Raakel as they trotted around.
“Just relax a little,” Tonya muttered under her breath, tensing instead as Ransu jogged a few steps to try to keep up with his sister.
Ransu stopped, huffing at August as the faery passed. August reined in, chuffing back. Ransu’s ears flicked and he tipped his wide antlers back and forth. Tonya recoiled from the movement of the branching prongs so near her face.
August chuckled, turning to her. “He says that he’s not going to let you fall.”
“That’s easy for him to say. He’s not up here feeling like driftwood in a storm.” Tonya tightened her grip on the reins. Ransu snorted again.
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