by Flynn Eire
“Agreed. And with only two pilots then yes, of course.” He dropped my hand and gestured his head over to Norris. “Is he going to be okay?”
My gaze snapped in his direction and only then did I notice he was practically about to have a panic attack he was breathing so funny. “Oh geez.” I hurried over to him and spun him around, taking in his wide eyes and the way he was clutching his chest. “Norris, it’s fine. Norris, you’re just freaking out because you stuck your foot in your mouth. No one cares, okay? Just breathe.”
“Smack him across the face like in the movies,” someone suggested.
Unfortunately that made him start breathing even funnier.
Instead I leaned in and pressed my lips to his ear. “Nothing’s changed. I’m still going to ravish you tonight when we get back to our room and show you the crop duster my parents have. Want to see it? It’s from the nineteen sixties. It’s really cool, but only if you calm down.”
He sagged against me with a whoosh and started taking long, slow breaths. I guided him over to one of the kitchen stools and went to get him some water but found my mum already there when I turned around.
“Now’s normally the time I’d tease you, welcoming you to the family but I get the feeling that’s what’s overwhelming you,” she soothed gently as he drank from the large glass, patting his knee, always so patient. She waited until he slowly nodded. “Not used to a big family, are you?”
“No, ma’am.”
“Things with you and Philo are new?”
“Yes, ma’am.’
“Well isn’t this one polite,” my grandma chuckled as she sat down opposite him at the kitchen island with a huge bowl of pea pods she was going to shell for dinner. “Good upbringing. What do your parents do, youngin?”
“Norris, ma’am. Norris Adley.”
And then the strangest thing happened. My mother and grandmother shared a look that broke my heart. They knew that name.
“Shanna Adley was your mother?” my mum asked gently.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“I’m so sorry, darling,” she whispered, hugging him tightly.
“Wait, was?” I murmured, moving closer. “You said your mom cleaned the East Coast women’s warrior camp.”
“No, she did,” Norris corrected, shrugging. “I’m an orphan. Have been for a while now. That coven raised me and kept tabs on me since my dad was a warrior, killed in battle.”
“How do you know his mom?” I asked my family sitting there.
“The coven tried to send her here when she got sick, assuming it was from the broken mating bond, once Norris was old enough to survive on his own. Sometimes the women can hang on if there’s a child to raise, but if they don’t heal properly from the broken bond, they’ll pass on as their mate has,” my mum explained. “I actually went there to try and help her so she could make the trip.”
My eyes just about bugged out of my head. “You never leave La Salvezza, and I’ve never heard of you leaving Europe.”
“I know,” she chuckled, running her fingers through Norris’s tangled, blond hair lovingly. “A young man got on the phone and asked me to please come and save his momma. He said he was going to grow up and be a big pilot one day, just like his daddy was, and he’d fly me anywhere I ever needed when that happened, but he couldn’t yet, so if I could please come then on my own and save his momma, he wouldn’t ever ask Santa for presents again. He sounded so much like my own son it broke my heart.”
“That was you?” Norris rasped, looking wrecked and shaken all at once. “I never saw you. I had no idea you were from La Salvezza or what that was until Philo told us all.”
“I came. She passed just after I got there. I’m so sorry for your loss. You were understandably upset and of course you probably don’t remember much from them. You were only what?”
“Ten,” he mumbled, shrugged. “I remember everything. I mean, some of it’s blurry, but I remember everything. I’m not sure I ever saw you.”
“No, I never introduced myself to you officially. There was no point in it while you were grieving.”
Norris looked up at my mum with tears in his eyes. “Yes, there was. I would have thanked you for getting on the plane and coming. I know how badly planes scared you, just like my mom.”
“What?” I gasped, glancing between them. My mum winced, and then Norris frowned, realizing he’d let something out of the bag. “You’re afraid of flying? I’m a pilot, Mum.”
“And you crashed one of your first flights. You almost died in that, Philo. Yes, the damn things scare me. We had to go through so much to get you a new human identity, explain why there was no body, and then all you wanted was to get in another one of those death traps. I couldn’t even breathe.”
“Oh, Mum, they’re perfectly safe now. Those were death traps, but now, they’re as safe as cars, even more so the way I fly, I swear.” I pulled her in my arms and hugged her tightly.
As I held my mother I stared in Norris’s eyes, Casablanca flashing through my mind. Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world… Norris ended up at my camp, training with me. What the fuck were those odds?
No, seriously, what were those odds? It had to be less than the lottery, right?
7
I couldn’t even look at him during lunch. When he tried to sit next to me, I jumped up to get a drink and then sat in a different seat. I felt his eyes on me though.
But what was there to say?
Oh, wow, weird, your mom never told you she was afraid of flying but I knew that because when I was ten I talked to her because she was going to come and try to save my mom’s life but couldn’t… Hey, want to go make out some more?
Yeah, that would be perfect.
It didn’t help that his mother and grandmother were watching our interactions, but at least they wouldn’t ask certain things that Philo would, so when lunch was over, I opted for hanging out with his grandmother in the kitchen shelling peas. It seemed safer.
Especially after I figured out she didn’t ask questions if I did first. The woman liked to talk… Or maybe she realized I didn’t want to and listening was all I could handle right then so she was helping me by blabbing on. Thinking back on it, that was probably more likely. She seemed really sharp.
But it was nice to hear all about Bari and the Italian coast over there, the weather that time of year, the harvest they were bringing in, and whatnot.
After the peas—and there were tons of those, enough to feed an army, I realized, so there had to be more people staying there than us—I peeled carrots, which again was fine by me. Every so often I glanced over and saw Philo helping a few people making dough and bread that went into the huge ovens the massive kitchen had.
“I guess I thought we’d be having pasta for dinner,” I joked, trying to say something to his grandma.
“Tomorrow. Glenna was so excited her youngest was coming home that she hurried around to make his favorites, had his dad get the smoke shack going, and started plucking birds. She makes the best smoked chicken you’ve ever had. The secret is the glaze she primps them with every hour. So tender.”
I smiled politely. “Look forward to it.” I’d never seen a smoke shack before. That would be cool.
When I saw Glenna move off to assign rooms to the last of everyone arriving, I excused myself, making a snap decision, washed my hands, and followed after her. She was just wrapping up when I cleared my throat to let her know I was there. She turned around and raised an eyebrow at me. “What can I do for you, Norris? The carrots done already?”
“No, ma’am. I was wondering if there were any rooms left? Or maybe I could double up with Verge if it wouldn’t upset your chart too much?”
She didn’t hide her shock well but then glanced down at her clipboard. “No, there’s two in his room already and we’re overstuffed as is.” Then she tucked it away and stared up at me with the same hazel eyes Philo had. “Do you want to talk about what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”
“No,” I whispered, hating that she had this strange in with me that melted my walls. “I need some time, please. I just—I have to think. This is all too much.”
“Okay, well, our residence has guest rooms too, for friends of the family when they come visit. I’d say you qualify for that.” My cheeks burnt at that label but I knew she hadn’t meant it because I’d been intimate with Philo. She showed me the room and I thanked her before hurrying to Philo’s room to collect my things.
“What’s up?” his deep voice asked from behind me as I walked out of the bathroom with my toiletries. “Are you packing?”
“Um, just switching rooms,” I mumbled.
“Why?” he demanded, and I shivered at the anger in his tone, not having wanted to cause a scene or start problems.
“It’s too weird, Philo. This whole thing is just too weird,” I rambled, tears burning my eyes. “We should just take a breather, go back to before last night and—”
“Yeah, whatever, go back farther even,” he snapped.
“What?” I whispered as I turned around to look at him. He was staring down at his feet, arms crossed over his chest. “What are you saying?”
“That you should talk to Matteo and tell him you’ll be returning to his training.”
My mouth fell open as my heart ached in my chest. “So what? I won’t screw around with you and then you won’t train me? Was that always the game here? I got naked and the knowledge or I got nothing?”
“Think what you want, do what you want, it’s obviously all about you, what you need, and what’s best for you, Norris,” he seethed before turning around and storming out of the room, not even looking at me. I stood there like a fool, thinking there maybe had really been something starting between us.
I hurried to tuck my stuff into the guest room before swallowing my emotions and going to find Matteo so I could get with whatever program he had the rest of the post-trans on. It took me a bit but finally someone pointed him out directing traffic and room assignments. So he had been with the last group and was probably tired.
Great. Just great.
“Hey, Matteo, sorry to bug you.”
“Hey, Norris, no bother at all. How are things with Philo? I heard you got to fly shotgun with him,” he greeted giving me a bright smile as he looked up from his notepad. Then he slowly frowned, giving me that funny look as always.
“Um, things aren’t working out. He said to tell you I was reassigned back to you.”
He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, tucking his notepad under his arm before cupping his elbow. “Normally I would be more gentle than I’m about to be, but I needed this break too, Norris. I really did. Coming here meant less drama for me and I’m about to explode.”
“I know, I’m sorry and—”
“No, you don’t know,” he snapped and then took another deep breath. “I’ve been in the middle of way too much for way too long going all the way back to Alexander and Dimitri, even lately with Roarke and Wally, just because I can see it all. Now I know you’re hurting even if you’re eyes weren’t filling with tears.”
I sniffled and quickly wiped them, hating I was upsetting him and really upset to be put in this position, cursing Philo even more.
“So I need you not to give me the dance everyone does before telling me what they eventually tell me anyways and tell me why your aura is so messed up right now and you’re in this much pain. Please? For once someone just spit it out. I’m begging you to be kind to me.”
I bobbed my head, shocked at his frankness. So I did. I gave him the two-minute version of it all, glazing over how I knew Philo’s mom and my mom dying, but ending with Philo transferring me back to him because I refused to put out anymore because I needed a break.
“You misunderstood because you were upset, Norris. I’ve known Philo for years, decades even, and while he can be coarse, abrasive at times, and a little dense, he would never be a bastard like that.” He whistled to Nate and tossed him the notepad. “Take over for me, babe. I gotta help someone and then you’re giving me a backrub in the shower.”
“Yes, sir,” Nate chuckled, easily catching it. But I saw the worry in his eyes. He thought his mate was going to explode soon too.
And I was making things worse. Lovely.
“Let’s go,” he ordered, grabbing my wrist and dragging me after him. I didn’t even get a chance to ask where, though I had a sinking suspicion I knew where—or to whom actually.
And he was the last person I wanted to see, but really, Matteo was freaking me out worse right then than the idea of being around Philo. It took us a while, the grounds extensive, but finally someone admitted they saw Philo storming off to one of the barns.
Sure enough there was lots of banging and Philo swearing like I’d never heard him before.
“Always the odd fucking man out. Why do I bother?”
“Stay here,” Matteo hissed at me while Philo banged away, tucking me in a dark corner behind a workbench. Then he moved closer, ignoring the hostile space and acting like it was the cafeteria on Taco Tuesday.
Ballsy.
“Fuel gets old. It fucking goes bad. If you don’t change it out, it clogs the mother fucking fuel line. I tell them this, but no one listens to me. Better to spray all the crops by fucking hand, huh? Sure it is,” Philo ranted.
“Sure that’s what you’re pissed about,” Matteo drawled, dragging over an empty bucket and flipping it over before sitting on it. “Why do I have my post-trans back?”
“I’m not getting into this with you. Go meddle somewhere else,” Philo snarled as he glanced at Matteo. I actually flinched, never having seen so much anger in his eyes.
“You know why I get stuck in the middle of too much, Philo. I’m not a meddler. Don’t put that on me,” Matteo bitched, picking up a wrench and launching it at Philo’s shoulder.
Philo lifted his head and went as if he was going to throw the mallet in his hand but then slowly lowered it, the rage sliding off his face. “Yeah, I know. Just never been on this end of your gift. I get why people get pissed now. It’s not easy being the one you see the stuff from. Some things are private, Matteo.”
“I know. I do. I don’t like it either, but given where you grew up, I would think you more than any others I’ve come to help would understand that sometimes we all need a hand to get to where we need to go.” Matteo’s head angled a bit but then he blew out a harsh breath. “Now why does that sadden you? You obviously have enough faith in this place, love your family enough and trust them to have recommended us all come here to heal.”
“Loving them, trusting them, and feeling like one of them is not the same thing,” Philo muttered before shoving something into a hose that I assumed was the fuel line. “I wasn’t. My father had his kids from his first mating. My mother had her kids from her first mating. They were all brothers and sisters or step brothers and sisters. They both healed here, my grandparents coming together and using the Sutton lands to make this place. Then they fell in love. I was the only child of their mating, centuries younger, half brother to both sides.”
“And the only warrior if I remember what you said before,” Matteo added gently. Philo nodded. “Okay, that’s rough, I admit it. I’m sorry. I know how being an outsider sucks, but they obviously love you, I mean I saw your mom all over you in the kitchen. I would kill for that. So unless you tell me you have a bunch of evil half siblings, I’m missing the problem.”
“No, they were great to me,” Philo admitted, slapping down the tube almost like a kid pouting. “I mean, as much as they could be with such a huge gap. They’d muck up my hair, take turns watching me, play with me, but—”
“They didn’t really play with you because they weren’t your age,” Matteo figured out.
“Yeah, I grew up without any friends my own age. Just my half siblings who found it fascinating I was going to be a warrior when their dad was with my mom or vice versa. That and the people who came here for help. I was always the outsi
der.”
Matteo waited for him to say more, but when Philo didn’t, playing with the hose again, he sighed. “Why is this all coming up now, Philo? What does this have to do with Norris and sending him back to me?”
Philo glanced at Matteo and I covered my mouth with my shaky hand at the sight of tears in his eyes. “Because when we found out that he knew my mom in some Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon kind of way, and here I’m thinking Casablanca and he’s asking to change rooms and go back to before we made out and I found out I like being patient with a virgin if that virgin is Norris. Me? Patient? Have you heard of such an insane thing?”
“No, actually, that shocks me,” Matteo admitted.
“Yeah, me too,” Philo agreed, getting to his feet. He shoved the tubing onto the plane and pulled something else off. “And then he wants me to train him. Just pretend it never happened. Like I could. Like he could as if it’s no big deal. And I blew. He was trying to sneak out of my room like I’d done something wrong. So that patience thing paid off well, huh? And people wonder why I don’t stick my head out and try to talk to others, date, or anything. I’ll stick with my fiction, thanks. It was fun.”
“I know you’re hurt, Philo.”
“No, no I’m not,” he lied, even I could tell he was lying out his ass.
“He thinks you were only willing to train him because you could get him into bed.”
“I know,” Philo rasped, picking up the mallet and banging on something else. “Sticking out my head and taking a chance was a fucking great idea. So great he could think that of me, huh? Nice assumption to jump to. Totally sounds like me and what he should think of me after spending time with me, in my bed even, when I didn’t push him. He told me he was ready for something I knew he wasn’t so I shut it down. If all he meant to me was sex, I wouldn’t have done that!”
And that was officially when I felt about two inches tall. He was completely right and totally valid in his rant, even how he’d yelled at me.