by Jenn Sable
Robby shrugged. “Why not?”
I looked at him incredulously. “Because I just can't; people don't do that.”
Robby arched a brow. “So people give up on love to take jobs they don't want?”
“Yes. I mean no, I mean, I can't go back to Pine Haven. Melissa deserves a man who can protect her and be able to provide for her.”
Robby rubbed his chin. “Sounds like you don't believe there's ever going to be another position in any other firm available to you?”
“I'm sure there would be eventually. I just don't know when. I don't know how long I would be loafing around, causing Melissa to doubt me. She might even start to regret her decision because we tumbled into love so fast.”
Robby smiled. “So you love her.
I sighed and took a sip of scotch. “Yes, I love her very much.”
“This sounds to me like you're having a crisis of faith in yourself. If you want to prove to Melissa that you are brave enough for her, then first, you have to love her enough to do whatever it takes to stay with her.”
Somehow through the scotch-drenched haze, that sentiment resonated with me. Oh, shit. Have I just given up on the girl I love?
“Have you spoken with Melissa?”
I shook my head. “No, she doesn't want to talk to me.”
“She doesn't want to talk to you over the phone while you’re thousands of miles away, but do you think she would in person?”
I shrugged. “I'm not sure.”
The airport intercom interrupted the Christmas music. “Flight to New Jersey international Airport is now boarding. Flight to New Jersey international Airport is now boarding.”
Robby clapped me on the shoulder. "That's my flight, and as I said, I wanted my bandmate to come home with me, so I have an extra ticket if you want to use it.”
I stared hard at him. Fuck. Fuck! “It probably wouldn’t work anyway. Melissa has already lost faith in me.”
Robby shrugged. “You're right. It might not work, but you'll never know if you don't try. Well, Clay, it was nice seeing you. I hope to see you around, but it doesn't sound like I will. I'll give Leona and Eve your best.”
Robby stood and threw a hundred-dollar bill on the bar.
"Take care, Clay." Robby tucked his wallet back in his jeans, picked up his carry-on, and walked away.
I drained the last of the scotch. The image of Melissa on the last day I saw her with tears in her eyes, begging me to stay in Pine Haven anyway, flashed behind my eyes.
I took a deep breath, stood, and grabbed my travel bag. “Hey, Robby, wait up!”
Chapter 13 - Melissa
I pulled the edge of the curtains back and swore when I saw the same delivery boy as the night before pulling my pizza out of the back of his Corolla. I grabbed another twenty-dollar bill and opened the door. “Hey, Trey.”
He smiled and wagged his brows. “Hey, Melissa. Any big New Year’s Eve plans tonight?”
I stared at him and blinked. I was in the same sweats and an over-sized army sweatshirt that I’d worn the last three times he’d delivered a large eat-my-feelings-away, extra-cheese-with-olives pizza. “No, Trey. No plans.”
He frowned. “It’s New Year’s Eve, though.”
I bit the undersides of lips and reminded myself that he was a young boy. “New Year’s Eve, right. I am aware.”
He looked confused. “You’re not going out with your husband?”
I started to pray for patience. “No, you’re thinking of someone else.”
“Huh?”
“How much do I owe you?”
He blinked and glanced at the pizza as though he wasn’t sure how to proceed. “Nothing, your husband called and took care of it.”
I raised my brows. “That’s shocking because I don’t have a husband.”
He smiled. “Well, okay, fiancé, maybe? I wish I could remember the guy’s name.”
I rubbed my temples. “No fiancé either. How about this, I’m going to give you money for the pizza so that when your boss realizes this went to the wrong person, you’ll already have tonight’s pizza covered.”
Trey laughed. “Miss Monroe, there’s been no mistake.”
“Take the twenty anyway. Then, if there’s no mistake, you keep it. Happy New Year’s Eve.”
The boy’s eyes bulged. “Holy crap! Really?”
I softened and smiled. “Yeah, Trey. You deserve it.”
He laughed and nodded. “I get off at eight. I’m going to take this twenty and pay my brother to score me a bottle of wine so I can take it to my girl tonight.”
Oh, no. “Oh, good. How old are you again?”
He smiled. “Twenty-one tonight.” He winked.
I shook my head and laughed. “Please be careful. Don’t drink and drive. And, Trey?”
“Yeah?”
“Use protection.”
He blushed. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Have a good night.”
He flashed another charming smile and held up the twenty-dollar bill. “Thanks again, Miss Monroe. I hope that you and your fiancé have a great new year.”
I tried to smile but ended up baring my teeth. “I don’t have一.”
Trey snapped his fingers. “Clayton! I hope that you and Clayton have a great new year.”
My heart stopped. What were the chances that this other fiancé was named Clayton? Fate has a funny sense of humor.
I waved, closed the door, and shuffled into the kitchen with the pizza. Tonight I’ll be fancy and use a plate. Take that New Year’s Eve.
My phone buzzed on the kitchen counter, and I swiped open my home screen to see Tess’s text.
Tess: If I weren’t running a temp of 101, we’d be hitting every NYE party in the Haven!
Me: Did you call the doctor yet?
Tess: Yes, I got an appt for 8 am tomorrow! I hope I don’t sleep through it.
Me: Need me to drive you?
Tess: No, I’m staying at my parent’s house, and dad will take me. I need YOU to party for BOTH of us tonight.
Me: Yeah, no. Roz is throwing a party but not sure I’m up for it.
Tess: Go to Roz’s party!
Me: Meh. She wants me to meet someone. I’m not ready.
Tess: Meet him! You’ve got to get right back up on that horse.
Me: Ugh, not likely.
Tess: Gooooo!!!
Me: Fine. Take some Tylenol and go to sleep.
Tess: Go to the party and meet this new guy.
Me: Maybe I will.
Tess: I’m so proud of you! This new year is going to be the BEST. I promise!
Me: We’ll see.
I set my phone down and flipped open the pizza lid. Whoever made the pizza spelled out “I Heart You” with the olives. You’ve got to be kidding me.
I slammed the pizza lid closed, shoved the box into the fridge, and marched back to my bedroom closet. I refused to sit at home alone another night, sulking over the fact that Clayton McCade had chosen a job over me. I looked over my shoulder from my closet and stared at the big empty dresser. I’ve got two Christmas trees and a big-ass empty dresser because of that man.
The house phone rang, which meant only one of two people was calling—my Aunt Leona or Aunt Eve. They always preferred to call my house phone over my cell because of the reception. I walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge of it.
“Hello.”
The man, on the other end, sounded surprised. “Oh, hello there, this is Jeff Warwick. I thought I was going to get an answering machine. Sorry to be calling you so late on a holiday like this.”
I shook my head. “It’s not a problem. How may I help you?”
“I just wanted to let you know that I found a few designs for a studio that you can look over next week during our meeting.”
My brow furrowed. “What studio, and what meeting?”
He cleared his throat. “The meeting that Clay set up. I’ll be out to take a look at that sunny spot in your backyard and give you my opinion on wh
ich set of plans might best work for a photo studio.”
What the hell is happening? Another Clay mistake? Clay didn’t even know I wanted to build an at-home photo studio.
“I’m sorry, there has been mistake. You might want to call your client back and check the phone number and address again.”
There was a beat of silence. “This was the number listed. The house is on Bluebird.”
I shook my head. My head started to pound. “Look, whatever plans Clay made weeks ago no longer apply. So, trust me, this is a mistake."
"No mistake. Clay emailed yesterday. So, I'll see you next week for the walkthrough."
My mind whirred, but before I could compose myself, the man ended the conversation. "I look forward to seeing you next week. Happy New Year's Eve."
I hung up. My heart thudded wildly. What the hell is happening? I've got to get out of here. Fate is just being cruel tonight.
I scanned my closet and ran my fingers over my hangers. My hand stopped on the midnight-blue dress I had worn the night Clay took me to Felix’s for my birthday. This will be perfect.
*****
I slid the back of the teardrop earring into place and checked my hair in the mirror. I look pretty damn good. Now for the shoes.
I walked to my shoe closet and pulled out a couple of options when the doorbell sounded.
What now? I peered out the window and saw Robby Lennox’s huge luxury SUV. Robby? What is he doing here? The doorbell chimed again.
I hurried down the hall. “Coming!” I flicked on the porch light, pulled open the door, and lost my breath. There stood every handsome inch of Clay in a tux, holding two dozen lavender roses.
"Hi, sweetheart. Happy New Year's Eve."
I've never been one to faint or even grow lightheaded but seeing Clay at my door caused the world to tilt sideways. My stomach clenched, my heart raced, and my vision blurred. Oh, my God, I'm going down.
All I remembered was the bouquet of lavender roses dropping to the floor and the feel of Clay's arms wrapping around my middle before everything went black.
I have no idea how long I was out, but I smelled smoke which was alarming enough to pull me back to consciousness. I heard the song “Blue Christmas,” which was confusing. I tried to swallow, but my mouth was bone dry.
My eyes fluttered open, and Clay squatted down by the fireplace, feeding the flames he'd started with small logs and what looked to be my old wedding invitations.
I blinked a few times and realized that I was lying on the couch under a soft, thick plaid blanket that smelled like Clay. I groaned, and Clay immediately knelt beside me.
"Hi, sweetheart. Here, take a sip of water." He held a straw up to my lips, and I latched on.
Blessed water. Thank God!
The cold water was a godsend and revived me. Clay stayed beside me, encouraging me to take sips of water and gently stroking the hair out of my eyes.
I took a deep breath and croaked, "Get out."
He continued to stroke my hair. "How about this? I’ll get out as soon as I know that you're okay."
It was hard to concentrate on what Clay was saying because he looked at me as if I were the most precious thing in the world. His eyes shone like crystals. My tough exterior started to crack and crumble.
I swatted his hand away. “You left before. Why is it so hard now?”
Clay looked at me under his brows. "I left because you repeatedly told me to. You said that my being here only reminded you that I was going to leave and that it was breaking your heart worse than if I’d just go. And I was dumb enough to leave without telling you that I loved you. Dumb enough to let fear be a driving force to put a wedge between us. But now, I’m here to ask for your forgiveness."
I sat up, and the thick plaid blanket slid down, exposing the valley between my breasts. My eyes widened. I hadn’t noticed that the zipper on my dress was open, causing my breasts to spill out. “Oh, my God, did you undress me?”
Clay’s eyes snapped to mine. “You fainted, sweetheart. I wanted to make it easy for you to breathe, so I unzipped your dress and covered you with that blanket. I’m sorry if I overstepped my bounds there, but my intention was medical. Now, though, I can’t keep my eyes off it.”
I pulled the blanket up a couple of inches.
His lips curved into a small smile, and his eyes twinkled. “What kind of bra are you wearing tonight?”
I rolled my eyes. I knew he was going to say something about it. “Not that it’s any of your business, but they are padded stickers that you place over your peaks so that you can wear them under any dress without straps showing.”
He wagged his brows. “I like them. A lot. I don’t think you should wear a bra again and let me unwrap your peaks every night.”
I shook my head. “Now you’re just trying to distract me from the truth between us.” I watched his neck work to swallow.
“Sorry, love, but you’re the one who is distracting me.” Clay pulled the edge of the blanket up a few inches higher, and the backs of his fingers brushed over the skin on my chest, giving me goose bumps up my arms.
I took a deep breath. “Clay, you repeatedly told me that you had no other choice but to take the job at the base since it didn’t work out with Lyons Medical.”
He nodded, sat on the couch beside me, and reached for my hand. I reluctantly gave it to him but relished the warmth and strength of his fingers wrapped around mine. The pad of his thumb gently caressed the delicate skin on the back of my hand, and my entire body responded.
“I panicked. I'd only envisioned one way for me to be here. I tied that to my employment. I have always had a job—a mission, a purpose. Not having secured employment made me feel lost and it messed with my definition of what a man was to a household. The problem is I can't be anywhere else without you. I love you, Melissa.”
I choked on a sob. “Is love enough for you?”
Clay’s face looked ashen, and his eyes took on a hollow stare. “When I left for Scotland, I was in rough shape, but it wasn’t until I got there that I plummeted. I drank myself into a stupor every day, wishing like hell that I could come back and prove to you that love was enough.”
My heart ached over the thought of Clay acting so recklessly over his heartache. In truth, we’d both hurt one another. We’d both given up.
Clay lifted my hand to his lips. “I didn’t want to face that you weren’t responding to my calls or texts.”
“Leona told me that you called her to ask about me.”
Clay nodded. “I had to know that you were all right, because I wasn’t. I didn’t want to face that our time together had come to an end. I worried about you constantly, and, in return, my family worried about me. I even decided to leave for Alaska early, as you mentioned before, just rip the Band-Aid off and feel the pain in one blinding blow.”
I squeezed his hand. “What made you change your mind?”
His features softened, and his face brightened with an easy smile. “Believe it or not, running into Robby Lennox. He saw me getting drunk at the airport bar in Glasgow. I’d reached a new low and felt the need to take action. At that point my mind was so muddled with alcohol and depressing thoughts, that I decided everyone would benefit the most if I left. I just happened to pick the same day Robby was leaving Scotland early to return to Pine Haven and be with Eve. It felt like fate was intervening and my guardian angel came in the funny form of an ex-rocker.”
I chuckled, just picturing the two of them having a heart-to-heart at a bar in the middle of a busy airport. “That’s kind of funny.”
Clay nodded and laughed. “It was hilarious. Of course, I didn’t laugh about it until four hours into our flight. Robby pointed out that if I didn’t try to make this work with you that I’d never know and suffer the regret all of my life. That was too high of a price for me to pay, Mel. I am here to ask you if there’s still room in your life for me?”
Yes. Yes, I will always make room in my life for you. I just don’t want to be hurt ag
ain. “Your leaving hurt me more than Michael’s cheating.”
Clay looked as though I’d thrown a spike through his chest.
I squeezed his hand again. “I feel so close to you, and in many ways, I grew closer to you in a few weeks than I did to Michael in a few years. Our relationship has gone from zero to a hundred, but it feels natural because I’m that much in love with you.”
As soon as the words left my lips, Clay crushed my mouth with a kiss. “You love me; you love me,” he whispered against my lips, and my fear started to lose its footing.
I cleared my throat. “Yes, very much so.”
His hands cupped my face, and he pressed his lips to my forehead, my cheeks, my lips. “Then we’ll be okay. We can make this work.”
I stilled his kisses. “What about your job? Are you still going to feel so lost while you wait for a position?”
Clay looked directly into my eyes and squeezed my hands. “Yes, as long as I have your love then I’ll make it through anything. You know, Robby told me that if I followed my heart and took a step in its direction, then the heavens and earth would move to help me. I thought he was buzzed from Manhattans at that point, but I checked my emails a few hours into our flight. It was something that I hadn’t done in days. I was stunned to see an email from Brian Zimm at Lyons Medical. He stated that the company just received a new contract with the state government and needs three engineers, not one. Since I had already interviewed the first time for the position, I’d be automatically accepted for a second-round.”
Relief flooded my chest, and I straddled his hips to throw my arms around him. “That’s wonderful, honey. I’m so happy for you and proud of you.”
Clay chuckled. “Thanks, sweetheart. I immediately emailed Brian back on the plane, and much to my surprise, he got back to me right away. He’d been worried that I wasn’t going to respond. He mentioned that the Lyons Medical team liked me and was impressed with my experience, although it didn’t meet their normal requirements. I go in for my second-round interview on the fourth.”
I sat back on his thighs and stared into his eyes. “So, you want this life here?”