by J. M. Madden
Healing Hope
JM Madden
For my Beta group! Thank you for sacrificing sleep and for just being awesome in general. You ladies are amazing!
Sandie and Lucien, may the next phase of your lives be as amazing as you hope them to be.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Epilogue
About the Author
Also by JM Madden
Copyright © 2021 J.M. Madden
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to the vendor and purchase your own copy. Do not take part in piracy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
Any logistical, technical, procedural or medical mistake in this book is truly my own.
Created with Vellum
1
Paul never would have expected to be in this position. He prided himself on being smart and ahead of the game. Why then, was he feeling like the biggest, most gullible schmuck that had ever walked the planet?
“Daddy, I think she loves me!”
Paul glanced back at his beautiful daughter, and her radiant smile. The car seat wasn’t very big, but she’d made enough room on her lap for the hairy little brown and white dog to fall asleep. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen her smile recently, but this was definitely the biggest. All because of some little mutt.
Erin would probably scold him for taking the animal out of her cage, but there was only so much whining he could listen to on the drive back to California. At the rest stop he’d gotten Hope out to use the bathroom and walk the dog, and when they returned to the car, he could feel her gaze on him. He knew what she wanted. Child and dog both shut up when he let them be together.
“Thank you for letting me have her,” she whispered. “She’s so beautiful.”
His heart thudded in his chest. Okay, maybe he was okay with being a gullible schmuck if it made her this happy. He didn’t know what she saw in the scrap of fur and dark eyes, but it eased the sadness in his little girl.
They hadn’t had an easy time of it over the past couple of months, so he could be flexible.
It was the first genuine enjoyment he’d seen in her expression since her mother had died.
Tara, Hope’s mother, had been a setup by a friend of a friend. As soon as Paul met her, he’d known she wasn’t long-term relationship material. Tara expected the world to revolve around her. She was too self-centered. He didn’t think she’d come from a bad family, but she acted like everything bad in life had happened to her. It had been beyond tedious listening to her complain about how unfair her boss was, or the landlord not giving her more time to get the rent. Eventually he’d read the writing on the wall and made his escape. He planned on not calling her after that single, horrible date.
A week later she’d shown up on his doorstep crying, giving him a sob story about her father disowning her. Paul had tried to comfort her and one thing had led to another, then to them in bed. She’d been determined and he’d been lonely. The next morning she’d disappeared without a word and a month later she’d notified him she was pregnant.
What a mess that had been. Talk about gullible schmuck. He had a feeling she’d slept with him deliberately to get pregnant.
Tara hadn’t even considered staying with Paul. He was a handy bed-warmer, she said, but she never professed to love him. It was only later when he found out that her actual boyfriend was in jail, convicted of some major drug offense. Paul couldn’t even remember if she’d told him exactly what the charge was, he only knew that the guy had been convicted and was serving a ten-year sentence. Immediately, his estimation of Tara had gone down, but by that time she’d been several months pregnant. What was he supposed to do?
She’d allowed him to pay for the doctor’s appointments, but he hadn’t been allowed to attend the appointments with her. She’d given him a copy of the ultrasound when she’d gotten it done, and he’d been able to see his daughter for the first time, but that had been the extent of their communication. The speed with which she’d removed herself from his life had left his head spinning.
Though she hadn’t cut him out completely. Whenever she’d been short of funds, she’d give him a call, and sucker that he was, he would help her out, hoping he could see his daughter later. He should have talked to a lawyer sooner, but hindsight was twenty/twenty.
When Tara had the baby, she hadn’t even bothered to let him know. It was only when the baby was a couple of weeks old that he could see her. Angry with the entire situation, Paul had gone over to Tara’s apartment and tried to be civil, but it was difficult.
All of that anger and angst faded when he looked down at his daughter. Dark-haired and pale-eyed, even he could see how much she looked like him. Paul had never been the type to be able to look at a baby and see its heritage, but in his own daughter he could, and he felt such a sense of pride and love. With her dark hair and bluish-grey eyes, he could see parts of his own mother and father. He could see nothing of Tara’s blond hair and brown eyes.
Tara, of course, had derailed their connection. On his second visit with his daughter, Tara informed him they were moving across the state. The smug expression in her eyes had confused him because he had done nothing to Tara to hurt her, but she was taking incredible satisfaction in making it as difficult as possible for Paul to see his daughter. When he asked her where she was going, she’d given him a town name but no address. Tara had promised to let him know as soon as she got settled and they would set up visitation. The very next day, she left.
Tara never let him know where they landed. She turned off her facebook page and social media and disconnected her cell phone number. Paul was left with only dead ends, and no thought where they could have gone. The city where she’d supposedly been heading had no record of her. Paul had hired an investigative group out of Denver to find her and the baby, but it had taken them months to find her.
The Lost and Found Group had given him more than he’d asked for, though. They’d given him hours' worth of footage of Tara moving around. She was in California now, in a small artist community in the mountains. They were off the grid, mostly, which had been part of the reason the detectives had such a hard time finding her.
As soon as he got a bead on her, Paul had filed court papers for visitation. His lawyer had been encouraging, but when they’d walked into the hearing several months later, Tara had unleashed holy hell on him, claiming he was aggressive with her and domineering. Every feminine wile she’d learned in her life, she used on the kind, older judge.
“I can’t even go out to my brother’s house in California without him hiring detectives to track me down. They stalked us for weeks, videotaping us and maki
ng us uncomfortable.”
“Your Honor,” Paul’s lawyer had stood, shaking his head. “Mr. Jameson was only concerned for the welfare of his child when the mother left town without telling him where she was going.”
“I told him I would tell him, eventually.”
Tara burst into tears and Paul had been with her long enough to tell they were fake, but the rest of the men in the courtroom were taken in by her false distress. The judge’s eyes softened and Tara, strategist that she was, made her final play. “Your Honor, he seriously has some issues. His arm was blown off in the war and I think it damaged something inside him, mentally. He is so controlling, and when he doesn’t get his way, he gets mad. And I get scared.”
Paul was fuming at her unfair words, and she pointed an accusing finger. “Look at him. He’s so mad! I won’t subject my tiny daughter to that.”
Quicker than he could believe, Paul had lost every chance of being with his daughter. He could have supervised visitation once Tara settled permanently, but that would be arranged through the court.
He was in a daze as he walked out of the courthouse, and he could still remember the complete desolation in his heart. He’d lost his little girl.
By the time she ‘settled’ in Oregon, Paul was ensconced in his new director job at La Jolla Rehabilitation Center. He’d seen his daughter eight times in her life, about twice a year, before Tara was killed in the crash, making him a father in truth, finally. Tara’s former boyfriend was still incarcerated and there were no other family willing to take the toddler. Paul tried not to be happy about that, but in a way he felt vindicated. Fate had given Tara a chance to take care of the baby. Now it was his turn. And he was loving it. Hope was an amazing little person and he could see both aspects of himself and Tara, but her personality was uniquely her own. Paul could lose himself in watching the emotions play over her tiny face, especially her joy.
That was why he’d agreed to the dog, even though it would be a pain in his ass. Nothing else had given his daughter joy like the little animal, and he planned on keeping that expression there.
Now if only he could find a reliable nanny.
Paul settled into the drive, brainstorming requirements for a caregiver.
2
Pulling into the lot of the Healing Home office, Jessamy Swan parked her jeep and slid out, giving a little wiggle to settle her shorts over her thighs right. It was sticky hot today in San Diego and she wanted to keep driving just to keep the air moving, even if it felt like a blow dryer was blowing in her face. It was a hot one today. Or maybe it just seemed so hot because she was so tired.
The chill of the AC as she walked into the office was a shock. A shudder wracked her body, but she smiled at the admin. “Hey, Mel. How’s it shaking?”
Mel looked up with a grin. “Fine, mostly. What are you up to, Trouble?”
Jess made a face at the woman. “What? Trouble? Me? Nah…” she laughed.
Mel just shook her head. “No speeding tickets on your way here? Or is there a stray homeless man in your car? Or a cat? I’m afraid to ask where you’ve been this week.”
Jess laughed, leaning against Mel’s desk. “No homeless man today. And I was in New Guinea this week on a date. We went snorkeling.”
Mel rolled her dark eyes, laughing. “Was it a good date?”
Jess shrugged. “Meh. He just wanted a companion he could show off.”
“How do you find these guys?” Mel breathed. “I can’t even find a guy to get pizza with, let alone fly off to an island in the Pacific. It’s an island, right?”
Jess nodded at her questioning look. “It’s about a five-hour flight from Australia, actually. And New Guinea is a country. One of the smallest in the world, but definitely an island.”
Mel stopped and stared at her, shaking her head. Jess tossed her hair over her shoulder and shrugged, grinning. “You asked.”
Shaking her head, Mel moved to the open office door. “Carolina. Your wandering savior is here.”
Carolina George walked out of the office looking buttoned-up and prim in a purple suit, totally opposite of Jess herself. Grinning, Carolina laughed as she looked her up and down, then pulled her in for a hug. “You’re looking deliciously tan, Jess. Come on in.”
Jess returned Carolina’s hug and followed her into her office. “Thank you. Coming from a California girl that’s saying something.”
Jess didn’t feel like she looked any tanner than she normally did. She glanced at her thigh as she crossed her legs, running her hand down to her knee. Okay, maybe a bit. She had noticed that her hair had bleached a little, lighter blond highlights shooting through the tawny brown.
Carolina appeared sun-kissed as well, Jess thought. There was a flush to her cheeks that was a little curious. “Are you okay?”
If anything, her cheeks darkened even more. “Yes, just running late.”
Jess grinned. “Ah… anyone I know making you run late?”
“No,” Carolina snapped, a subtle smile spreading her lips. She reached for a manila folder. “So, about this job.”
“Worst segue ever…” Jess murmured, grinning.
“I had a call from Erin Knox about this job. Paul Jameson is the hospital director for La Jolla Rehabilitation Center. They serve mostly veterans recovering from injury, and he’s a veteran himself. He has recently taken custody of his daughter but there were some guardianship issues. No details about that in here, but Erin says he’s floundering a little. The transfer of guardianship was sudden and he’s scrambling to get the girl settled. She is about to turn five.”
Jess gave her a look from beneath her brows. “I don’t normally do kids.”
Carolina drew in a breath. “I know you don’t, but we’re in a pickle right now. I have people dropping like flies from my company and we’re all having to adapt.”
“Why do you have people falling like flies?”
Carolina sighed. “I’m not even sure what the deal is,” she complained, throwing a hand in the air. “There are just a lot of relationships developing recently with my contractors. It’s taxing my already small workforce. Even my sister abandoned me.”
“BB?” Jess questioned.
“Yes,” Carolina said with an eye roll. “She fell in love with the Navy SEAL I sent her to work with. So,” she said, giving Jess a significant stare, “no relationships! I shouldn’t have to tell you, because I know how you feel about long-term relationships, but I’m still putting it on record. Sleep with him if you must, just don’t abandon me.”
Jess laughed, making a face. “Okay, Mom, I’ll try to behave myself. Kids aren’t normally my thing, so I don’t think you have to worry about me settling in for too long.”
Carolina nodded. “Yeah, I didn’t think so. This will be short-term placement until he can find someone more long term. This guy works crazy hours I guess, and he just needs some basic help.”
“I can help them out for a few weeks. I have a do or die appointment overseas next month, though.”
Laughing, Carolina shook her head. “Must be nice to have such a carefree lifestyle.”
Jess blinked, a little stung by her friend's words. She wasn’t sure why exactly. Pushing to her feet, she took the folder from Carolina. “When are they expecting me?”
“Not until this evening. I figured that would give you enough time to go home, do some laundry and re-pack.”
Jess sighed. “Yeah. I suspect I should do that.” She headed for the door, calling over her shoulder, “And don’t worry, no emotions when I sleep with him.”
“Jess-” Carolina growled.
A tall, dark-haired man stood in the reception area, one eyebrow cocked. Carolina muttered a curse under her breath, making Jess grin. Usually she was the only one that made Carolina curse like that, but it was obvious by the woman’s reaction she wasn’t happy that the man was here.
“Detective. What a nice surprise,” she said, voice clipped.
Jess glanced at her. She said the right words, but
her voice was frosty. There was something in Carolina’s expression, though, that said she wasn’t completely mad to see the guy. Jess looked at the tall, delicious looking man.
“Detective, huh?” She stuck out a hand. “Jessamy Swan.”
The guy took her hand in a quick shake, then released her. “Detective Blackheart. Tell me, Ms. Swan, do you work here?”
Jess grinned. “Oh, sometimes. When my social life lets up, she occasionally finds me reputable work.”
“Reputable, huh? Are you leaving for a job now?”
She nodded, swinging her hair behind her shoulder. “I am.”
“And does that job involve sleeping with your client?”
“Detective!” Carolina gasped. “Jess, don’t answer that.”
Jess just looked up at the detective. He had glanced at Carolina, his eyes lit with something, and Jess realized that though his question might be work related, he was here because he was interested in Carolina. “Well, Detective,” she drawled, bringing his attention back to her. “What’s wrong with spicing up your work life with a little sex? As long as you don’t hurt anyone and go into it with your eyes open.”
He stared at her for a long moment before tipping his head toward her. “You know, that’s an interesting way to look at it, Ms. Swan. Thank you.”
With a last glance at Carolina, she headed out the door. She had laundry to do.
Carolina stared at Detective Blackheart. Holy hell, he couldn’t have arrived at a worse time. Jess’s darn mouth…
She refused to defend Jess, though. The woman knew what she was doing and if she wanted to sleep her way around the world, Carolina couldn’t say anything about it. Even though it made her uncomfortable sometimes.