Ever.
Where was her friend?
Closing her eyes against the heat of her tears, she bit back the quiet sob.
Friend.
They could only ever be friends.
“Darcy? Are you experiencing pain?” a worried voice asked from some distance from her. So achingly intimate and beloved. “The report indicated your wounds have been healed.”
Sweetie’s meow softened as the little cat lifted her head and stretched out her long neck toward the source of the voice. Soft footsteps padded to them and then a familiar, handsome body blocked out the light from the overhead device.
“Darcy. You’re crying. Please, do not be scared. You’re safe. I dealt with those men in kind for their violence against you. After I cleansed your home, I brought you to the research vessel for treatment. I didn’t mean to frighten you.” The concern in the lilting voice tugged at her heart. There wasn’t even an accent to the words.
And the being that leaned over her was definitely not a local. Not by a long shot.
Sexy to her?
Definitely.
But not human.
The skin was a bright emerald hue with an opalescent sheen like the surface of an exotic shell but the texture was a luxurious silk, slightly warmer than her own flesh.
“Darcy? Why aren’t you speaking?” her friend asked, cupping her face in a huge, webbed hand. Multiple jointed fingers flexed and the smooth membrane between the fingers stretched warmly from chin and jaw to ear. Tiny claws on each finger brushed into her hair, grazing her scalp. Her face tipped up so tenderly, she had no choice but to meet the soulful amber gaze that searched hers.
Curved black horns grew from the being’s temples, arching like corkscrew spears over a head crowned by long, glossy fins. The facial features were exotic—cheekbones shimmering with silvery scales, a broad nose flaring with gill slits that were currently pressed closed. There were darker and lighter fins and frills along the neck gills and shoulders but that sexy chest was bare as usual, the muscles trim and well defined under the flawless green flesh.
Just taking in the exoticness of those alien features reminded her why they could only be friends and why they’d argued.
Hot, salty tears spilled down her cheeks and they wouldn’t stop.
She couldn’t remember a name to put to that strange but beautiful face.
Darcy found it difficult to draw in a breath, desperate to erase the anxiety written in the alien features above her.
“Sshh, please, my Darcy, how can I sooth you?”
Sweetie uncurled from her chest and jumped onto a nearby counter with tremendous grace despite her bulging abdomen. Along one side, a pink scar was the only visible indication of the accident she’d been saved from. That was only because the gleaming fur had not yet grown back. The little cat didn’t even walk with a limp anymore and had gained some weight in the past weeks.
Waves of concern washed over her and tendrils of affection coiled about her, pushing away the discomfort even more as long arms wrapped around her.
Using the satin tips of long fingers, her friend brushed the tears away. “Do you not remember me? It is I, your Wharkuz.”
“Wharkuz,” she croaked out and threw her arms around Wharkuz’s neck for the very first time. Hard muscles pressed against her curves and she was aware that this body was all male. The scent that filled her senses was a clean and sharp citrus and juniper. His natural musk made her head swim and pleasure spiked through her. The affection she felt weaving around her deepened.
“I couldn’t remember your name. I didn’t…”
“You do not recall how we met?” The question sounded worried and a little sad. “You thought I was trying to eat Sweetie. I had gathered her little broken body from the road after she’d fallen to the attack. I did not even make it to the water’s edge before you demanded that I give you the feline.”
“I remember.” She sniffled quietly and squeezed him tighter. His arms wrapped around her and his large hand rubbed between her shoulders soothingly.
“And you assured me that I knew nothing of feline anatomy. As a doctor of animals, you would know best and you properly corrected me. Which is fortunate, as you were able to assist me in calibrating the unit for Sweetie. I don’t believe your primitive technology could have saved her.”
Sweetie paused in licking a black paw and uttered a faint mew that made Wharkuz chuckle very softly.
“Sweetie thanks you, of course, but believes she is well suited here, although she does like your visits.” He nuzzled her hair, drawing in a slow breath, as though taking in her scent. “I like you here as well.”
The feel of his warm breath teasing over her neck and ear was even better than all the fantasies she’d imagined since the first time she’d seen him. She might not have remembered his name, but she couldn’t forget the sensations that had seized her body and heart upon their meeting.
She’d denied it for many weeks, because relationships weren’t built on primal, physical attraction. People didn’t instantly fall in love. And what did it say about her that this monstrous-looking being turned her on more than any other person.
As the days and weeks had passed, he’d found reasons to meet her at the dock. She’d enjoyed their conversation more each day. He might be ignorant of human customs but his knowledge of space, and so many worlds beyond, was staggering. Somehow they balanced each other. He never made her feel less for her lack of experience and she delighted in his eagerness to learn everything he could about her planet.
And her.
But despite the fact that he made her feel like the center of his world, this was the most he’d ever touched her. Prior to this, the handholding during the movie had been the limit of their contact. “I like being here as well,” she murmured, “with you. How do you understand her? Or, are you teasing me?”
He growled, a low vibration of displeasure passing through his chest as he caressed along her temple. Her scalp there was sensitive to the slight pressure he applied. “It’s my empathy. You don’t remember that, either? Or our conversations about it?” He lifted his head and she regretted the loss of contact. “I have learned a means of communication with her, though it’s mostly sensations rather than words. It’s much different than how I sense you.”
“Yes. I remember now.” It explained the external sensation that had teased over her. He could, when desired, share his emotions as well. The concern and affection was from him and probably the sense of calm and wellness. She’d given permission long ago and now he was taking her pain away. “Things are just jumbled. I…am struggling to put all the pieces together.”
“Do you remember our excursion to the market to purchase proper feline care supplies?” he asked with an amused twinkle in his eyes.
“I do. Oh, that was quite a day. The image of you in human guise is quite clear to me.”
He flashed his fangs in an impish grin she’d once found almost terrifying. “Is that so?”
“Yes.” She reached up and cupped his jaw, daring to stroke the fringe of fin along his jawline, marveling at the unique texture, particularly as it fanned wide at her caress. “You picked a perfect disguise, but I like this. I’d rather see this.”
He sucked in a sharp breath, either at her words or her touch, she couldn’t be certain. His amber eyes seemed to lighten but perhaps that was because his pupils constricted to slits. His hand covered hers and pressed her palm against his warm skin.
“I am sorry that we had a fight,” he said at last, his voice gone all husky and full of growls. “As I hope you may remember, I am not familiar with courtship rituals. Not only the proper human customs, but all in general. As a neutral I am not accustomed to such strong emotions. Yours are so vivid and raw, they overwhelmed me. Frightening. Wonderful. You were well within your rights to state your feelings and I was too distracted to think and communicate properly.”
Through the lust his touches stirred in her, she focused on his words. “Neutral?” s
he asked, exploring the intricate detail of his face where she touched him.
He searched her features, his smile melting slightly. “Another detail you’re missing. And an important one.
Here it was. The reason for their disagreement.
The real reason they could never be together.
She wanted to take back the question instantly as he drew away from her and took her hands in his. How could that one word unravel all the wonderful feelings she’d enjoyed upon waking?
“I’m not a true male. I identify as male but my body never transitioned during my maturing cycles. It isn’t common among my people, but not unheard of, either. Usually upon maturing, our bodies develop male, female, or dual aspects. My body never developed the necessary hormones to complete the change. After many years of trial medications I’ve come to accept that this is my fate.” He reached up and touched one of his horns. “I look like a juvenal. Neither male nor female. It’s unknown if I might develop late as sometimes happens, but there’s no telling if I might become female. Best to accept that this is me. Lacking any sex.”
As he laid out the explanation, more memories slowly untangled from her fogged brain. He was a merian, a particular category of beings labeled as Aquarians, just as humans were categorized as terrestrials. The reality of his gender was at the heart of the reason she wanted him to watch Peter Pan, the boy who never grew up. Instead of it lightening the tension between them, it had only reminded him that his people did not see him as an adult.
That she found him attractive was something more than taboo in their culture. Because he looked like an adolescent, and should never be viewed as a sexual being.
Ever.
She understood that but it didn’t change how she felt about him. He was so intelligent. Fun and silly? Sometimes, but always in a manner that was mature.
Darcy loved him.
“I’m so sorry that I forgot so much, but it’s coming back to me. I remember now. I remember our fight, too, and I regret letting my frustration get the better of me. I thought I could convince you to just give it a try.” She held up her hand when he opened his mouth to speak. “I don’t see you that way. You’re clever and smart and caring. But I understand your customs and taboos. We can remain friends?” she asks hopefully.
Her heart screamed at her withdrawal. What she wanted was to convince him, but her attempts at seduction had gone nowhere. Because he wasn’t designed that way. His sexual drive was missing.
They were simply not compatible.
And it hurt.
He blew out a breath and tipped his head, watching her. “I wish for us to be the best of friends. I feel such affection and tenderness toward you. Of all the humans I’ve met so far on my mission, you are by far my favorite. I wish I could be the mate you need. It would be such an honor for me. I wanted to tell you that during our heated conversation.”
“Our fight you mean.”
His face fins pressed back in displeasure. “I was not fighting you. I would never…”
“Friends and even lovers sometime express their disagreements like that, Whar, there’s no shame in it. What’s important is how it’s all resolved.”
“Well, that may be the case, but I would like to keep a more sensible attitude. It’s quite unlike me to let my temper lash like that. And then those aztars burst in. They dared touch you.” His full lips pulled back from his teeth, showing off the tips of two sets of upper fangs. She’d never seen anger like that on his features before. With his brows drawn low over his big eyes and his head fin extended, he appeared a terror from a horror novel, not her sweet, considerate and mild Wharkuz.
The fear for her alien returned. “And you’re all right? They didn’t hurt you? I don’t really remember what happened.”
“You are the one who they wounded. Your fragile human body pulled about as though they wanted to rend off your limbs.” Huffing, he spread his arms wide to display himself to her.”Do I look harmed?”
Of course she wouldn’t decline the chance to openly admire his body.
Good lord, he was a god in flesh and bone. Angels would weep just setting eyes upon him. All that sexy body and he was completely asexual and not interested in physical touch. His green skin gleamed with good health and his tight muscles appeared carved in raw emerald. A dusting of silver accented the ridges of his pecs, abs and obliques. He wore no clothing, as was usual, so she enjoyed the full glory of him. He was flat as a Ken doll at his groin except for a small indent like a dimple at the slight mound between his thighs. It was just the hint of where his genitals, male or female, would be if he’d developed.
Not for the first time, she imagined what he might look like fully male. If this was the body of a juvenile, would she drop into a swoon at a mature specimen? More importantly, as a fully transitioned Wharkuz? Though, perhaps his interest would remain just as nonexistent.
“Well?” his question broke her admiration of his strong thighs and she jerked her attention back up to his face. He was smiling now, only the tips of his fangs peeking out behind his dark lips, which were full and velvety in appearance. What texture were they?
“N-no. You look good.” She chewed her lower lip and murmured under her breath, “Way too fucking good.”
The elegant fins along his jaws twitched before fanning open wider. He’d obviously heard her. She’d never seen him blush and wasn’t sure he was capable of it, but imagined if he could, he would be right now.
On impulse she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. The feel and taste of him did not disappoint. Like the scent of him, there was a tart citrus flavor on his lips that mingled with the crisp scent of him that intensified now that she was pressing against him. The texture of him teased her— that perfect mixture of soft and firm.
A gasp escaped him and his body tensed but he didn’t pull away and she savored the moment he gave her to remain close, nuzzling her lips across his. Unfortunately, his mouth didn’t respond, even as she nibbled across his lower lip.
His hands closed around her shoulders, gripping her as though he was going to pull her back, but instead he kept her pinned in place and uttered a small, uncertain groan.
Her tongue lashed across his lip and the flavor that surged through her sent a tingle all through her body from the point of contact, straight to her sex. Low in her belly, her muscles tightened and squeezed in desperation to be filled.
“Darcy…” his voice whispered against her mouth, her name a quiet plea. “What are you doing to me?”
She could feel the tips of his claws press against her skin as he trembled. “Kissing you,” she whispered against his parted lips. He sucked in a sharp gasp and groaned it out as their breaths mingled.
“Kissing,” he echoed against her mouth.
Instead of pulling away he held very still and, with uncertainty, returned the movements she’d made against his lips. He nibbled at her mouth and even plied his sharp teeth against her lower lip.
She gasped at the delicious prick of pain and tasted the copper tang of blood.
He winced as though he felt it, too. “Darcy…I…”
Darcy silenced his apology, or protest, by deepening the kiss. She pressed her mouth to his and her tongue boldly darted forward to coax his lips open. The sting from his love nip mingling with the sensation of the kiss drove her wild. And her increased boldness encouraged him.
He pulled her up against his chest and wrapped one of his arms around her while the other sank into her hair, grasping a handful. His little claws caressed her scalp and the grip against her drew a moan from her throat as he slid his tongue over hers in a languid exploration until he was delving into her mouth to claim her.
Unlike other men she’d kissed, his face had no facial hair stubble to scratch or abrade her. He was smooth as the finest satin—warm and luxurious.
His grip was just enough pressure against her hair to threaten real pain, but he knew her limit. He felt her emotions.
And she felt his.
Oh,
did she. Her nipples were so hard they sent a delicious ache through her whole body.
She’d experienced the warm affection and happiness from him; a familiar, warm blanket when they were close. This was new. The longing had an intensity that made her arch into the solid warmth of his muscular chest.
The sound of his mixture of distress and pleasure filled her mouth as he consumed her lips, her tongue.
Finally he broke the kiss, loosening his hold on her hair. When she looked into his face, his eyes were bright. Instead of the amber of whiskey, they burned a heated scarlet, like glowing coals. He gazed into her soul, pressing his forehead to hers.
Waves of confusion and sorrow swept through her as his emotions bubbled over. It became a savage tide crashing against her desire, pleasure and hunger. “I wish I could be what you need.” His fingers slowly released her hair and he stroked it, smoothing his palm along the crown of her head to the nape of her neck. “You’re in need and I can do nothing for you.”
She was out of breath, mind swirling with the war of her emotions tangled with his. Navigating this new ability of sensing both would definitely take some getting used to. Darcy wanted to tell him there were things he could do. There were fingers and tongues and that tail of his! “It’s all right. I’m fine. This was so good. If you really want to explore, there are things we can do together.”
He gave a small shake of his head, not in denial but as though to clear the thoughts from his mind. “You must rest.” His thumb brushed along her lip and she groaned as the touch ignited the bite he’d left, sending sparks flying down to her sex. Another swell of confusion flooded her. “I will treat this first and then you must rest. Your body hasn’t had nearly enough time to regenerate. I shouldn’t be causing you more damage.”
She grasped his thick wrist, stopping him from pulling away. “Wharkuz, it’s fine. Sometimes it’s fun to get a little rough. I liked it.”
But his eyes were so troubled that she wasn’t sure he believed her. The red coloring hadn’t faded despite the end of their extraordinary kiss. “You’re not wrong, it was enjoyable, and it gives me great satisfaction knowing I could give you pleasure that way. You, however, are healing and I don’t know why I can’t control my impulses when you’re near me. At least recover from what those…men…did to you before you request I hurt you again.” He flashed a small smile at the end of his request and leaned in to press his cheek against hers.
From the Depths Page 20