by Lea Linnett
“You got out of the way?”
“Almost. Knife glanced me.”
“What about this?” he asked. He’d rested his palm across a large gash beneath her breast, at the bottom of her ribcage. It looked newer, still pink and slightly puckered, but its edges were clean.
“That,” she said reluctantly, “is from a few months ago. Cara and I were organizing a large group of Lodestars, and recruiting more from some weird human integration thing in New Chicago.”
“Human integration?”
She sighed. “They wanted to give humans ‘a place in Senekkar society.’ That place was cleaning rich levekk’s houses.”
“Ah.”
“It was complete bullshit,” she added, and while Kamanek didn’t know the word, he understood the meaning. “But anyway, our recruiting was going pretty well. We even had some explosives—not to hurt anybody, just to make a point, you know?”
He chuckled. “Sounds sophisticated.”
“It was, and we had a pretty good plan in the works, but some members of our group disagreed. We were outnumbered, and one of the fuckers got me with a knife. Wasn’t deep, though, and it missed everything important. I just packed it with some gauze and kept going.”
“You kept going?”
“For a while. I had to keep up with Cara. It really wasn’t so bad, it just looks it because the guy had no idea what he was doing with the knife.”
“And what about this?” he asked, cradling her jaw and tracing a clawed thumb over the indented scars on her cheek. Taz looked away.
“More sparring,” she said, practically speaking the words into his chest.
Kamanek hummed. “You sparred with a levekk before me?”
She froze, her dark eyes rounder than usual when they finally met his, watchful now.
“How can you tell?”
He debated making an excuse, spinning a story that wouldn’t anger her, but decided she deserved to know. “I know the damage levekk claws can do.” He shook his head. “Short of wearing armor, there’s not much that can stop them.”
Taz’s lips pursed, her gaze hardening. “I suppose you’ve seen plenty of sub-species being injured by levekk, as a mercenary.”
Kamanek hesitated. He’d never enjoyed the more unsavory aspects of his time as a gun-for-hire, or even as a soldier, but now he felt almost… guilty about them. “Some,” he said quietly. “I prefer to use other means of subduing people, though. If I can.”
“But you’ve hurt people. Sub-species.”
“Have you never hurt anyone? Have you never been ordered to hurt someone as a Lodestar?”
She looked away, her eyes going distant as she pondered the question. “Yes,” she said, and to his surprise she shifted in his arms, pulling his left hand into the space between them and running her fingers over his sanded-down claws. “I might have.”
“Is that why you’re on probation?” he asked.
Dark eyes flicked up to meet his before skittering away, and she pursed her lips. “Something like that.”
“Something like what?” he wheedled, and to his delight a flicker of the fire he’d come to love so much ignited again in her eye.
“Take a hint, asshole.”
He grinned, tickling the down-soft skin of her side. “I’m just curious. What could you have done that’s so bad?”
“Look, I don’t want to talk about it,” she snapped.
“Then tell me about how you got this scar, instead,” he said ghosting his lips over her cheek. “And I’ll share something in exchange.”
Taz’s eyes narrowed, and she briefly squeezed his keratinous fingers. “What if I’ve run out of questions?”
“I don’t think you have. I’m too interesting for you to be bored, yet.”
She frowned, fighting the smile that tried to pull at her lips, but curiosity burned in her eyes. “Fine. Why are you a mercenary? What made you leave the military?”
He thought he had an answer to any question she could give him ready on his tongue, but that one caught him off guard.
“Was it something to do with your friend?” she asked, and then bit her lip. “I know you didn’t want to talk about it, but…”
Kamanek prepared himself to lie, as he always did when people found out about his history. He’d never told the story. Partly because no one had ever asked, and partly because the mere thought of reliving it made his stomach turn. But now, he felt strangely compelled to tell her the truth, to share something with her, and unlike his deeds as a mercenary, he thought that this was something she could maybe… understand.
“It’s related,” he said, gripping her hand in his. “I didn’t take Tanis’ death well.”
Taz shuffled closer, pressing her lips to their entwined fists, her gaze serious.
“I got sloppy, started acting out again. In Senior Division, we were able to get away with fraternization charges on account of us still being trainees. But when you’re a full-fledged soldier, and your superiors catch you fucking your newest squad mate during a rest week? The response is a little more severe.”
Her frown deepened. “They threw you out over that?”
“With my record from Senior Division? It was almost a certainty. My attitude during my review might not have helped, either.”
“So, you wanted to leave?”
“By that point, yes. I… didn’t appreciate how they treated Tanis after her death.”
“What does that mean?”
He paused, his throat turning tight like there was a physical barrier between him and the words. This was getting dangerously close to the part that he couldn’t talk about, even if he wanted to. It was one thing to talk about Tanis when she was alive, and it was entirely another to talk about her death.
“I mentioned that she had a lover? More than just a casual partner?”
She nodded.
“Our superiors found out about it after the fact, and struck her name from the Kerkaza, a monument back on Origin that honors those who died in service of the Constellation. I couldn’t forgive them for that.”
“That’s awful,” Taz murmured. “I still don’t understand how they could think that. That loving someone is a liability.”
Kamanek swallowed. “Is it not? You need to focus on yourself on the battlefield, not anyone else.”
“But having loved ones gives you something to fight for. Like I fight for Cara.” She sat up a little, looking him in the eye as he struggled to reply. “You obviously cared for Tanis. As a friend. Didn’t that make you stronger?”
“That’s… different.”
Taz frowned at him, her dark eyes searching his face, and he looked away. All he knew was that losing Tanis had felt like losing a part of himself. If that’s what love was like…
He didn’t want it.
“Now,” he said, dropping Taz’s hand and smoothing his palm over the curve of her ass, “I believe it’s your turn to spill your secrets.”
Taz’s eyes widened. “Hey—”
“Uh-uh,” he said, pressing a finger to her lips. “You promised me, remember?”
Her brows dipped in anger, and she wrenched his hand away. “Don’t coddle me.”
“Stop trying to wriggle out of it, then.”
“I didn’t wriggle,” she said haughtily, but shut her mouth when he tickled at the underside of her thigh, trying not to laugh. “Quit it.”
“Come on,” he said, softer this time. “At least tell me which asshole I need to throttle for hurting you.”
He was only half kidding, and he thought maybe Taz realized that with the way her skin reddened. “I never knew his name,” she said quietly. “He was just a levekk from off-planet who came into our hub hoping to stick his cock into something exotic.”
“By exotic, you mean… human?”
“Yeah.”
“Did he do something to you?” Kamanek asked, the thought making his jaw clench.
But Taz shook her head. “No. I was behind the bar, and a kid besides. He�
� tried to hurt Cara. Asked for a private room—which, of course, our boss gave to him, the asshole. He sent Cara in to serve him and I didn’t fully grasp what was happening, but our boss knew. Everyone knew. It was only when I heard her shout that I followed.”
“You didn’t…?”
“No, I didn’t see anything. Cara’s tough, she didn’t let him get very far. He didn’t have much security—probably thought we were all just weakling sub-species. I got in his face. Well…” She glanced up at Kamanek, a small smile now curving her lips. “I attacked him, really. And so he gave me this.” She brushed her hair away from the three ragged scars, and they glistened in the light from the window. “But don’t worry, I gave as good as I got.”
“You injured him?”
“Yeah, I cut him up a little. A lot, really. He ran out screaming,” she added with a chuckle.
Kamanek blinked down at her. “You’re a bit crazy, aren’t you?”
She scoffed. “Who isn’t, living on this mess of a planet?”
“That mess threw us together, so it can’t be that bad,” he murmured, before his heart fluttered. Why did he say that?
But Taz just pushed at him, hiding her face as it flushed. “Where the fuck did that come from?”
“What? You didn’t enjoy yourself?” he asked, doubling down. His hands shot out, grasping her wrists, and Taz’s eyes narrowed in challenge. They tussled on the cot, almost tipping it, until he managed to trap her beneath him again, a thigh pressed tight against her rapidly warming core. “So?”
She bared her teeth. “So what if I did?”
He ached to join with her again, but felt the uncomfortable tug of nature calling him. He excused himself, trailing his fingers along her body and fighting leaden limbs that would have much preferred to stay comfortably in bed. His body protested further when the soles of his bare feet touched the chilly bathroom floor, which had been so far untouched by the sun and the flophouse’s sketchy heating system. He shivered as he relieved himself. It was almost torture to be kept away from Taz’s warm body for even this long.
A tinny ringing sounded from the room behind him, and when he eventually emerged, he found Taz sitting up on the cot, her comm in her hands. She was still naked, and Kamanek frowned at the sight of her olive skin covered in a sheen of moisture very unlike the kind that he’d managed to inspire earlier.
“Y-you’re here?” she asked, wide eyes glinting in the afternoon light. “In Sek Vorek?”
The sound of a voice on the other end, measured and female.
“I… We’re in the warehouse district, to the south. We’ve rented a room.” As she relayed the details of their location to the mystery caller, Kamanek laid down behind her. She barely seemed to notice him, and she jumped when he traced a claw down her spine. But she didn’t push him away.
“I’ll see you soon, I guess,” Taz said, sounding uncharacteristically nervous. A brief word on the other end, and then the comm buzzed with static.
“Who was it?”
Taz turned to look down at him, her expression unreadable. “Cara. She’s our backup. She said she’d meet us here…”
“When?”
“Soon…”
She was still sitting up, her lean muscles tight with tension. Kamanek felt the overwhelming need to soothe her, and he reached up, gently pulling her down to lay beside him.
He wasn’t ready. He wasn’t ready for Taz to retreat from him, or for this… closeness between them to end. He needed more time, wanted to use every second that they had before reality came rushing back in. “It’ll take her a little while to arrive,” he murmured into her skin. “We’ll get dressed soon.”
“Right.” Taz traced his scales with her fingertips, her eyes unfocused. “Yes. Okay.”
“In the meantime, don’t worry about it,” he soothed, running his fingers through her short hair. Unable to resist, he tugged her closer, melding his mouth with hers and entwining their bodies all over again.
Time was counting down far quicker than he’d anticipated, and something panged inside him.
“Don’t worry, Firecracker. We have time.”
20
Taz did her best to keep her mind as blank as possible as she entered the chem-shower for the second time that day, wincing at the initial sting of the chemicals against her skin. They were harmless, she knew, but that didn’t stop the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end in protest.
They stood up for an entirely different reason when Kamanek slid into the shower behind her, trailing his fingers down the center of her back. She turned, looking him over, but the fumes from the shower were already swirling around them, hiding parts of him behind a smoke-like cloud. She felt more than saw his hand come to rest on her elbow, pulling her close.
She indulged him for a moment, rubbing one of his scales with a thumb until it shined, but stepped back when he leaned down suggestively. Not that she could back away very far in the cramped cubicle.
“We’re out of time, aren’t we?” he asked, just loud enough to be heard over the sound of the spray. The words were somber, but there was a wry smile on his face.
“Yes,” she said. For some reason, saying it aloud made her heart sink.
The chem-shower may have been irritating, but it worked fast, and Taz emerged in no time with her hair still dripping. She tried to style it before the chemicals turned it clumpy, slicking the sides down to cover her scars, and shuddered as the strands stuck to her fingers. She then rubbed herself down with a small hand towel, the only absorbent item she could find.
Behind her, the shower went silent, and Kamanek stepped out, rolling his shoulders. He ignored the towels at her side, his scales already drying, and only paused to reach over and ruffle her hair as he exited the bathroom, ruining her careful work.
“Hey, what the—”
He grinned over his shoulder. “It looks better this way.”
She glared into the metallic mirror to her left, before turning back to him. “It looks like I’ve just been—”
“Exactly,” he purred, and Taz’s mouth snapped shut. Her cheeks heated, and wished she could simply remove the blood vessels entirely if they were going to continue to react so violently in his presence.
“Asshole.”
Even with Kamanek making snide remarks while they dressed, Taz found it difficult to ignore the tidal wave of panic that Cara’s call had generated. And when she moved to sit by the window again to wait, the sight of the warehouse brought it flooding back.
Cara’s arrival felt like two halves of Taz’s world colliding at speed. The past day—the entire week, even—had been a fantasy from start to finish. Taz didn’t work alongside mercenaries, she didn’t chase down bad guys in the largest levekk city on their continent, and she sure as shit didn’t spend entire days rolling around in bed with someone she’d known for less than a week.
But recently, she’d done all of those things, and she’d done all of them with a levekk, of all species. She knew Cara would grudgingly understand working with Kamanek, and she knew she’d come around to Taz’s decision to travel to Sek Vorek eventually. But fucking him? Willingly? There was no way Cara would accept that.
She couldn’t know. Taz had been at her side for almost her entire life. Cara fed her, clothed her, turned her into more than just a harbor rat stealing people’s valuables. And in return, Taz had made it her mission to protect Cara, and to help her succeed in whatever she wanted. She meant more to her than the Lodestars and everything they stood for.
Taz couldn’t allow her to discover what she’d done.
But when Kamanek appeared behind her, resting his hips gently against her shoulder blades while she stared out at the warehouse, she couldn’t help leaning into him. It was like her body had grown used to the feel of him already, craving gentle touches almost as keenly as it normally craved a good fight. She shifted when he sat behind her and pulled her back against his chest. Even fully clothed, she could feel him hardening against her ass, and flu
shed.
“Jeez, do you ever stop?”
“I’m not starting anything,” he said, before pressing a kiss to her neck. “I’m fine just like this.”
Taz agreed. His arms were threading around her stomach, holding her in place, and his weight was a solid and comfortable reminder of his presence at her back. She wanted nothing more than to just lay her head back and doze in his arms, but Cara’s impending arrival made that impossible.
“I can hear your heart beating,” Kamanek rumbled into her ear, using that low voice that made her squirm. “You’re nervous?”
Taz’s nostrils flared. “My sister is coming,” she explained, even though he already knew. “And we’re…” She fell silent, looking down at Kamanek’s arms linked around her waist.
“I take it she wouldn’t approve?”
“She can’t know,” Taz whispered, as if Cara was already in the room with them. “It would hurt her too much. I-I shouldn’t have even—”
Kamanek’s arms tightened around her, his breath fanning across her skin as he moved to press his mouth to her neck. “Shouldn’t have what?”
Oh, God, why did he have to make this so difficult? She twisted in his arms, not getting far with his grip on her, but enough to look him in the eye. “This needs to stop. I don’t regret it. I’ll even admit I wanted it, but… she hates your kind. I can’t have her find out about this.” She placed a hand on his arm, squeezing. “I can’t hurt her like that, after everything.”
The levekk’s pupils had sharpened again, two slits narrowing to wicked points as they read her face. Taz had never been one for hiding her emotions, so she stared him down, trying to make him understand.
“Do you want this to stop?” he asked.
“If it keeps Cara safe, then yeah.”
But Kamanek’s gaze didn’t waver, and Taz felt like those dark green pools were drawing her in, like a swamp that had grabbed her by the ankles and wouldn’t let go. “And would you still want to stop, even if Cara gave you her blessing?”
“I…” She hesitated. He was a levekk. His species had enslaved her planet. That should be reason enough to end it, right? She could push him away right now, chalk the day up to a mistake caused by exhaustion and frustration in equal measure. But the ‘Yes’ wouldn’t fall from her tongue. She sat there, in his arms, open-mouthed and silent, captivated by his river-green gaze.