by Lea Linnett
She couldn’t quench the flame of desire that Kamanek had started in her, no matter what she did. Her sleep was broken, her sessions at the window were unfocused, and Deeno had quickly put a stop to her attempts at pestering him when she tried to use him as a distraction. Her probation meant she had no chance to leave the dusty flophouse, and all of these things combined were making her feel like a grenade about to explode.
It didn’t help that she barely had a private moment to herself. Taz was never left alone, not even when Cara and Kamanek left to procure things for the mission, like a transport big enough to move humans in. That made the chem-shower her only me-time, and she found the chemicals even more irritating than the burning need between her thighs.
She wished she could get Kamanek out of her mind, but it was impossible. It wasn’t just the need to get off, either. Taz’s life had been struggle after struggle, fight after fight. But for a little while, cradled in Kamanek’s arms, she’d known what it was like to finally rest. She’d always hated being held still—just like she hated watching the window or being confined to the flophouse—but this had felt different. It was a kind of stillness she’d never experienced before, and she wanted it again.
So, when Cara announced mere hours before Niro’s deadline that she and Deeno would take the storage drive with the codes to Niro that day, her heart leaped with anticipation. Their week was up; the humans would be moved tonight. Finally, something was changing, and she could get the answers she sought, and maybe… something else.
“Just the two of you?” she asked, and then kicked herself for being so obvious.
Cara sent Kamanek a narrow look. “I need to discuss our plans with Niro, and Deeno needs to explain how to trigger the codes. And I’m not leaving him here alone.”
“You don’t trust me?” Kamanek sniped, grinning at her from his place at the window.
“Not enough to leave you unsupervised,” said Cara, her expression souring. Taz followed her and Deeno to the door, where Cara took her aside, speaking lowly in her ear. “You’ll be fine with him?”
“Duh. Course I will,” Taz said, hoping her sister couldn’t hear the thundering of her heart.
“I know. I know you can handle yourself if he tries anything. Just…” Cara’s hand tightened on her shoulder. “We’re taking the transport, so we won’t be long. An hour at most. And don’t take your eyes off that window.”
“You think something’s going to happen?”
Cara worried her lip. “I trust Niro, but not completely. If there’s even a chance that they’re planning something before tonight, I want to know about it. That window is our only opportunity to stay ahead of them.”
“Right. Got it.”
The room fell into a preternatural silence once Cara and Deeno left, and all Taz could hear was the sound of her own breathing. For the first time in days, she looked freely over Kamanek’s silhouetted body, and it dawned on her that they were finally, mercifully alone.
And she had no idea where to start.
“Come on, move your ass,” she said, stepping towards him. “It’s my turn to watch.”
His brow plate arched as he smirked over his shoulder at her, his teasing expression darkened by a wicked look in his eye. “But I only just started my shift.”
“And I need something to do. This room is driving me fucking crazy.”
He rose to his feet as she approached, and his hands found her waist, pulling her flush against him. Thick, muscled arms crept around her like a cage, one hand cupping her shoulder and the other slipping beneath her clothes.
“What are you doing?” she asked. She’d meant it to sound annoyed, but the words came out in a breathy whisper.
His grin turned sly. “We’re finally alone. And I’ve missed the taste of you.”
Her breath hitched as he kissed her. It was pure fire, his flat tongue fighting hers for purchase and his cock already pressing hard and insistent against her stomach. His hands roamed her body as if it had been months, rather than days, since they’d last touched, and Taz clutched him equally close, feeling the muscles of his back ripple under her fingers.
She wanted to feel more: the slide of his scales on her skin, the wet heat of his mouth, the fullness of him inside her. But Cara’s words were in the forefront of her mind as she broke the kiss. “We can’t,” she said, in a whisper that was quiet, but firm. “We have to watch the window. Especially today.”
His smile dimmed. “I’m starting to think I should invite the window into bed with us, with how often it comes up,” he drawled, licking his lips.
“Very funny.” She knew she should back off, but with his heart beating excitedly beneath her palm, she couldn’t bring herself to. She met his eyes, the dark green irises just barely peeking around his fattened pupils. “I’m serious.”
“I’m serious, too,” he breathed. “I don’t know if I can control myself for much longer. It’s like being presented with the most succulent meal, and having it taken away after one bite.”
“Very sexy,” she tried to deadpan, but her voice trembled.
“After the way I’ve seen you moan over those pindarro sanniches? You bet it is.” He stole another brief kiss from her that was barely a brush of their lips, a flick of his tongue, and then dropped gracefully to his knees. She gasped as he hiked up her shirt, placing an open-mouthed kiss to her bare hip. “Indulge me,” he said, almost begging.
All of the air rapidly left Taz’s lungs as his clawless fingers rubbed her clit, the touch electric even through her clothes. She clenched with need, her legs trembling, and it was only the adrenaline coursing through her veins, her fighter’s instinct, that kept her upright. She gripped his plated head in her hands, wanting nothing more than to let him have his way.
But as much as she wanted it, that cold shard of worry refused to melt. She’d craved these touches for days, but she couldn’t give into it, not without knowing.
“Who is Ceren Siikas?” she asked on a shuddering breath, and it took all of her willpower to push his head away.
The levekk’s pupils sharpened, making her go still, but he didn’t look angry. He closed his eyes, playfully fighting her hands as he said, “Nobody. Just one of the many assholes I’ve had to deal with over the years.”
“But you know him,” she insisted, digging her fingers in until Kamanek finally sat back on his haunches. “You’ve been acting weird ever since we learned his name. And I know Cara asked you about him.”
“It’s nothing. Really. He’s just an old acquaintance.”
“An acquaintance?” she asked. “Why would you be acquainted with someone trafficking humans halfway across the Constellation?”
Her voice had risen to a sharp snap that drew his attention, and when his gaze finally met hers it was clouded with shadow. She hated seeing this somber Kamanek, and hated being the one to bring it back to the surface, but she needed to know.
“Who is he?” she asked, smoothing her hands down either side of his neck.
Kamanek’s lips parted soundlessly, and for the first time ever he looked pained, his brow plate curving in a way she’d never seen before. “I…”
He fell silent, swallowing, and Taz dropped down to the floor in front of him. “If it makes it any easier, I’ll tell you what I did to get put on probation,” she whispered. “I tell my story, then you tell me yours, just like before.”
The levekk was silent for a long moment, his eyes wide, but then he nodded. “All right,” he murmured. “But let’s get more comfortable, first.”
He dragged her up off the floor, and they both straddled the bench, his knees gently bracketing her own. Taz took a deep breath and reached for his clawless hand, turning it over in her own. She hated talking about this, hated even thinking about it, but it was worth it, if it made things easier for him.
“You’re not the first levekk I’ve seen who didn’t have all of his claws,” she admitted. Kamanek’s head tilted in confusion, but she continued on before he could spe
ak. “I told you that me and Cara were recruiting in the New Chicago Senekkar? That they were trying to integrate humans into their society?”
“I remember,” he said, nodding.
“Well.” She took a deep breath. “Cara infiltrated the program as one of the humans being employed. She worked for a kerfaan, of all people, taking leave from his duties in the military.”
“Interesting.”
“Yeah. She was in this guy’s home, cleaning for him, and she knew it inside out. We couldn’t believe our luck, to be honest.”
“Did you learn anything from him?”
“Not really. He didn’t keep any data with him. It was just a normal apartment—cheap, even, as far as his type goes.”
Her fingers tightened on Kamanek’s and he squeezed them back. “Did he do something to her?” he asked, his voice dropping low.
“No.” Taz swallowed down the lump forming in her throat, forcing herself to continue. “But we did something to him. We needed a place to mobilize our new recruits, especially with what we were planning. We had explosives, and we wanted to make a statement, but it’s a hassle to move stuff through the climate-control domes at the last minute. So, we took over his apartment. The guy was quiet, kept to himself. No one really noticed us moving in.”
“But how did you take on a kerfaan? He would have been armed, surely.”
“He was, but Cara took him by surprise. Had a couple pindar take him down when he answered the door. That was the easy part. Deciding what to do with him was harder.”
“You didn’t kill him?”
“No. Though some of our people wanted to. We tied him up in a storage room, made it known that he was ‘going on vacation.’ And it worked. No one suspected us.”
“Sounds like you guys ran a tight operation,” Kamanek said. “But none of this is worthy of probation.”
Taz winced, curling in on herself. “Some of it was. Mila thought we were reckless. She blamed us for the split that occurred in our group and tore the mission apart. But that’s nothing compared to… to what I did. We had to make sure the kerfaan couldn’t escape. If he did, we were sunk, you know? So…” She swallowed thickly. “I ordered one of our guys—one of the pindar—to cut off his claws.”
Kamanek didn’t make a sound, but his lips parted in surprise, his fingers tightening around hers. Her heart thundered in her chest, waiting for the moment when he would pull away from her.
“I watched it happen,” she went on. “I had the guts to do that, at least. It wasn’t bloody or anything, but it was… difficult. The way he looked at me afterwards, like I’d done more than just incapacitate him.”
She dropped her head, staring at Kamanek’s hand in hers. He took a deep breath, his voice even as he said, “Levekk—especially those in the military—take a lot of pride in their claws. No matter how much tech or weaponry we have, it’s always possible to lose it all, but your claws? Those are yours. Some soldiers spend hours honing them and keeping them in peak condition.”
Taz nodded. She knew all this, but she also knew she had to hear it. She never wanted to forget what she’d done to the kerfaan. “I told myself it was necessary,” she said, “which made it easier. Things were going well for us, so that helped, too. But then everything in the Senekkar went wrong and when Mila found out what we did—what I did—she was so disgusted. She said the mission had gone to our heads, and she was right.”
Kamanek was still holding her hand, his grip solid and unwavering, but she didn’t dare look him in the eye. He had to be disgusted. It was one of his people that she’d mutilated, after all.
“Cara thinks it’s worth doing terrible things if we’re doing it for a good reason, but I don’t know if I can think that way anymore.”
“I can’t comment on that,” he said after a long moment of silence, “but I think you should know that that kerfaan’s life isn’t over. Even if he thinks it is.”
That made Taz look up, facing him even though her eyes burned with unshed tears. “What do you mean?”
“If he’s at all good at his job, there’ll still be a place for him in the military. And if there isn’t, well. There are plenty of other lives to live. And not all of them involve mercenary work.” He paused to lift her hand, kissing it and holding it close to his mouth so his words ghosted over her fingers. “You didn’t end a life. You just changed it.”
“Mutilated it, you mean.”
“No. If you ask me, he’s better off without his claws and the military.”
She gave him a dubious look, and then studied his fingers. “He might see it a bit differently from a levekk who was willing to part with his so easily.”
“You think this decision was easy?” he asked, and a small smile crept onto his face that Taz found herself gently returning.
“Was it not? I thought you valued your hobby more than anything else,” she teased.
“That isn’t why I removed them, though. Not at first. It was my last, small act of rebellion before they threw me out. My way of honoring Tanis when they wouldn’t. My superiors were all about appearances,” he added. “So I did the one thing I could to set me apart from them.”
Taz waited to feel jealous, but the feeling never came. It warmed her, seeing the usually flippant levekk talk so tenderly about the female. It was a softer side of him, one that made her shuffle closer, pulling him in for a long, slow kiss that made minutes pass like seconds.
The kiss changed so gradually that she couldn’t pinpoint the moment it went from sweet to electric. All she knew was that her back was soon arching, pressing their heaving chests together, and her body was primed for his touch long before his clawless fingers came up to brush her nipple. She gasped into his mouth, their rhythm stuttering, and her heart thumped louder when he growled low in response, pulling her fully into his lap.
“Wait,” she said breathlessly, pulling away for air. “We’re not done talking.”
“I’ll tell you after,” he rumbled, and he sounded as desperate as she felt, his voice rough. “But first, I want to show you what that kerfaan has to look forward to.”
His hand dipped low, teasing her slick folds through her trousers, and she bit back a moan. “We can’t. We have a—”
“There’s only one job I care about right now,” he said against her mouth, nipping her bottom lip. “Besides, I have a plan.”
“What plan?”
“You’ll see.” He slipped her off his lap and stood, slowly circling her.
Taz froze when she felt a large body slide in behind her. His hands found her hips, tugging her towards him until her back was flush against his chest, his cock pressing into the small of her back and his thick, muscular thighs bracketing hers on either side. She was about to ask what he was planning when a pair of soft lips swept against the shell of her ear, and a large, clawless hand flattened over her stomach.
“You watch the window,” he said, and the hand dipped lower, gliding beneath the soft material of her underwear and teasing the soft patch of hair there. “And we have a bit of fun.”
“Won’t that be distracting?” she asked, shivering when his other hand pushed her bra aside, toying with her breast.
“We’ll make a game out of it,” he said, breath hot against her neck. “Take your eyes off that warehouse and I win. It’ll help you focus.”
She laughed disbelievingly, but her strength was waning. He gently rolled her nipple, which felt as hard as a diamond now, between two blunted claws, sending a jolt of electricity right through her, and she felt the last of her resolve fall to pieces. She’d wanted this for so long. “Do your worst.”
Kamanek said nothing, only laved his tongue over her pulse, sending a shiver down her spine. He teased her chest with both hands, and Taz ground back against his length, craving movement after so long trapped in this room. She wanted to turn around and take hold of him, to fit them together…
But she had to focus. She breathed in a fortifying breath, applying all of her energy into ignoring h
is ministrations. The warehouse wasn’t a great distraction, as devoid of life as it had been all week, but she refused to let that derail her. She started by counting the darkened windows, before moving on to the small, spinning cameras that dotted the building.
Then she felt teeth on her shoulder, and suppressed a shiver. She opened her legs wider, wanting more of his touch, wanting him inside, and then his leg hooked around hers. He widened their stance even further, until she was spread as far as she could go, and she had to fight to suppress the moan that threatened to slip out of her. It didn’t hurt, her body made flexible by many years of training, but it felt dirtier than anything had before in her life, like he’d flayed her open for his pleasure.
Leaning her head back on his shoulder, she craned her neck to keep her gaze on the warehouse from this new angle. She could still see, but her focus was flagging.
She snatched up the binoculars that had lain by the window for days now and swept them over the warehouse, studying the now-familiar chain-link fence that bordered the back entrance. She counted the discolored patches in the wire where missing links had been replaced. She watched the steel roller door and willed it to stay shut, lest Kamanek take his hands off her.
She thought she was doing okay, until Kamanek’s de-clawed hand traveled down, flicking open the button on her fly. Her stomach clenched in anticipation, her lips clamped shut. But she knew her back had gone ramrod straight against Kamanek’s chest, and he smiled into the skin behind her ear now.
“How are you doing?” he murmured, leaning into her and jarring her zoomed in view of the warehouse. She dropped the lenses, pressing back against his weight. There was something thrilling about feeling the hard planes of his chest crushing her, about fighting against his inescapable heft.
“I’m fine,” she grunted, and felt more than heard him laugh against her ear. He eased open the zip on her trousers and raked the rough pad of his finger over her nipple at the same time, surprising a moan out of her.