by Marco May
My heart flapped like a white dove, and I was relieved that he couldn’t see the pathetic expression I was likely wearing.
So, Gary, huh? It wasn’t a bad name, but it wasn’t what I’d imagined. Then again, I wasn’t even sure what name I’d imagined him to have. His last name was interesting, though. Was he Middle Eastern or something? Still, it was nice to finally have an actual name, if just so that I wouldn’t have to keep calling him GGR.
I had to message him back, and the intrigue that revolved around him intensified. What was he like? What other things did he get into? What was his favorite color and favorite food?
Throughout the rest of the day, we exchanged messages back and forth to the point of having to scroll a lot just to reach the beginning of our chat history for reference. We chatted a lot about “Something Like Fate” and my other stories, and he’d told me it was a rare treat for him to have a personal ask-me-anything with an author, never failing to treat me as if I were bigger than I actually was. We also chatted about many other topics that didn’t involve writing or books.
While I hadn’t really learned a whole lot about him, given that he’d shied away from certain questions I’d asked, I’d learned some things that didn’t involve kinks or fetishes. He was out of state, for one, but that wasn’t really a surprise. He was very sexual and a bit too liberal for my taste, but that also wasn’t a shocker. His dad was of Middle Eastern descent, hence the Arabic last name, and his mom was White. He worked out a lot but wasn’t married to the gym, just enough to stay in top shape. He was heavily into dark music of all kinds and loved horror films, two things I totally didn’t relate to. He’d even been taunted as a kid by being called “Scary Gary” for his dark and strange nature, which wasn’t really surprising. Being that he was studying to become a middle school teacher for special needs students and worked as a substitute teacher, it explained why he had to be discreet about his personal life and interests, even with his family and friends, and I didn’t dare to ask to see a picture of him because of that. So, I’d discovered more about him than I’d thought I would, but I still needed much more.
However, what stood out the most about him was that he was a hopeless romantic, a family man, and marriage-minded, all important qualities I’d always wanted in a guy. Granted, he struggled with being gay, but he accepted that he’d never change or try to, and he still wanted forever with a guy, which was great. My exes had had those same relationship qualities, or so they’d claimed, before the first one had decided to be “straight” and the second one had cheated on me, each relationship having lasted for about a year. Gary was also fiercely loyal and protective when it came to those he loved and cared about, and I had to admit it was something that made me melt in a way I couldn’t explain.
Regardless of how mysterious and faceless he was, I enjoyed our DM chat, and I couldn’t wait to chat with him again. We hadn’t mentioned much about the hardcore stuff he reviewed, which was surprising. I’d have expected him to go on and on about it because it was the core of his popular blog. What else went on inside that naughty head of his?
I shut down my laptop and I got ready for bed, starting with a Bible read on my phone. As soon as I got under the sheets, shivering from the A/C, a smile spanned my face. Gary wasn’t just kind and warm and easy to chat with, but he’d shown me just what a real online chat was like. I’d never had a lengthy chat in my life, especially typing long paragraphs back and forth, and with substance. I couldn’t help but wonder what he looked like, though, since he already knew what I looked like. A bunch of different images often popped into mind. Since he hadn’t said a word about my looks, I hadn’t asked for a physical description of him. Even if we’d be only chat buddies, I’d be lying if I’d said I wasn’t happy to have met him.
Chapter 4
On Monday morning, I stocked more shoeboxes at a high-end shoe store in downtown, waiting for one of the sales associates to show up for the day. Being a new assistant manager meant that I was busier than ever, tackling more responsibilities, and I had to continue to perform my best if I wanted to be considered for the store manager position someday.
My phone buzzed in silent mode, and I waited until completing my current task to check it while there was only one customer in the store. That customer was probably still annoyed with me after I’d told him he had to wear a face mask to enter, so it worked out that he kept his distance.
I checked my phone as discreetly as I could to avoid being seen as unprofessional. The push notification read that it was a new DM from Gary. I normally wouldn’t bother with keeping up with messages while at work, but I couldn’t help it when it came to him, even though we were just chat buddies.
I opened the Twitter app, and my eyes bulged at a selfie of a shirtless jock type with gym shorts and sneakers, the head cropped for obvious reasons. He had sprinkles of dark hair on his pecs and flat belly, as well as on his forearms and toned legs, all damp with sweat.
The message attached read, This was me early this morning. What a workout! I trust you won’t share this pic with anyone. For your eyes only. ;)
My bulge grew at such an enticing picture, and while I didn’t know what his face looked like, it still changed everything. How would I ever see him in a platonic way? I knew myself all too well. I’d probably go home after work and use his picture as fodder for playing with myself. A part of me felt a bit guilty because he’d probably sent the picture innocently with no sexual intentions. Given the great distance between us and other differences in interests, we’d only be good friends at best.
I typed my reply. You make me wish I had a body like yours, lol. I was on the thinner side, not really out of shape and definitely not a skinny twink, just not toned. I could afford to go to a gym to tone up, but it took the kind of dedication I couldn’t seem to hold onto. I was also smooth and wished I had some body hair. Oh, well.
He replied, I’m sure you’re fine. I did see your face in your profile pic, you know? ;)
I wondered what was up with the winks. Was Gary flirting with me? I seriously couldn’t tell. I tried hard not to overthink it. Instead of a text reply, I decided it was only fair to take a full body shot. The one and only customer was busy trying on shoes in the next aisle, so the coast was clear. I placed my phone on a shelf in a nearby rack, standing it against a shoebox in a tilted angle. I set the timer to ten seconds and rushed to pose within a distance, keeping on my face mask and giving the camera a thumb up to be extra corny. My picture was taken, and I checked to see the result. Eh, it was nothing special, just plain old me in a polo and khakis like I always wore to work. It would do. Gary had already seen what I looked like, so I had nothing to worry about.
I attached the picture to my reply. Prepare to run away from my lack of hotness! Hey, at least my face mask covers part of the monstrosity, lol.
It took a moment for him to reply, and he reacted to my picture with a fire emoji, shocking me because it could only mean that he found me hot. How could that even be when I was average at best? Though, there were days when I did feel above average, but still.
Since there was no actual text reply from him, I decided to send another message. You might want to put the fire out so I won’t keep burning, haha!
Finally, it showed that he was typing a message, and it seemed like forever for him to actually send it. In my eyes, it’s impossible to put out the fire because you’ll always be burning. ;)
My heart might as well have been on fire from being so molten by his compliment. I honestly had no idea what to say. Instead, I reacted to his message with a heart emoji.
You’re welcome, Santiago. I hope one day you’ll see just how beautiful you really are. There was no wink that time. Maybe he was serious after all.
I was too overwhelmed to say another word to him. I just wasn’t used to compliments like his, especially since I hardly knew him. That said, I enjoyed every word of it and how he made me feel. It was so weird how an oversexed horndog who read lots of trash could make
me feel more beautiful than the two guys who had actually been my boyfriends. They’d never given me compliments like Gary’s, much less in more than a word or two. I scrolled up to see his body shot again, and I smiled. Not only did it make me hard, but it tickled my heart. After all, it wasn’t just the picture itself; it was the picture and his words combined into a beautiful package.
Chapter 5
I got home after a longer workday than normal since we were understaffed at the moment. It was evening, and I lounged on my bed in a tank top and boxer briefs, my belly full from a large frozen dinner I’d microwaved. I’d saved Gary’s picture without telling him, since I’d never share it with anyone. It was just more convenient to have in my photo album than having to scroll through our DM history each time I wanted to see it, especially when our chats grew indefinitely. I stared at his half-naked body, smiling, observing every part of him like a horny doctor. He really did have a beautiful body, and I was a little envious. At the same time, he thought I was beautiful the way I was, and that filled my heart with so much warmth.
I groped my growing bulge for minutes while my eyes were glued to his body, and I was overcome with the kind of desire I probably shouldn’t have been feeling. I felt so conflicted because of my morals against porn, yet there I was, playing with myself while leaking profusely.
What was wrong with me? An oversexed horndog who most likely had a perverted mind caused me to get hard just by a single picture, and I didn’t even know what his face looked like. As I slipped my hand inside the front of my boxer briefs, feeling extremely horny all of a sudden, I received a new DM from Gary.
I yanked away my hand and wiped my wet fingers on my tank top to get ready to type, making a mental note to wipe the screen with disinfectant after I was done. His message asked if I was behaving so far, along with the wink I’d oddly longed to see. I knew he didn’t know what I was doing at the moment, but the timing of his DM was eerie, to say the least. I was still so horny, though, and I felt a little flirty. I wrote back and told him that maybe I was and maybe I wasn’t, winking along.
Oh? Well, be careful with misbehaving. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to get spanked. ;)
I wasn’t sure why, but that last message struck with me more desire, and I wasn’t into kink. I decided to play along for kicks while smiling hugely. Not fair to assume I wouldn’t want that. ;)
But it might hurt. Especially if the one that punishes you pulls your pants down to make your bare butt turn red. ;)
I was totally not into this, totally not into someone like Gary. Yet my erection told me otherwise. Still, I wanted to play along some more. Maybe I need to learn a lesson? ;)
I guess you’re naughtier than I imagined. ;)
Is that a problem? ;)
Not at all. The more I learn about you, the more I like you. Always be yourself with me. No restraints. I’ll never judge you, Santiago. That’s a promise and I never break promises.
I swallowed and lost my hard-on at Gary’s last message. No wink this time, and it made me feel like he was being serious. Did he sense something about me? Was I really a naughty guy? No, no, God wouldn’t like that at all. Maybe I’d taken the chat way too far.
He sent another message. By the way. I don’t ever give out my Discord username to just anyone so quickly since I’m only on there to chat with close friends. And even though we just met the other night, I feel like I can trust you. Not sure what it is, but something tells me you’re a good guy. I’m not sure if you use Discord, but here’s my username in case you ever want to do voice or video sometime. It’s free and easy to use, and it’s better than Skype, in my opinion. You can even use the browser version, but I highly recommend the desktop app for a much better experience.
Gary gave me his Discord username. Things were escalating so fast to where we’d just had a naughty chat out of nowhere, and he suddenly wanted to hear my voice and see me on cam. The anxiety kicked in, and I decided to end the chat with a simple “goodnight.”
He said the same in return, even though it technically wasn’t night just yet.
I set aside my phone and looked at the ceiling, and I prayed about what I’d done until I calmed down. Writing tasteful erotic scenes in healthy romance stories was one thing, but masturbating to a guy’s half-naked picture while also having a naughty chat was wrong. Wasn’t it?
I sighed. Sometimes, I didn’t know what to think anymore when it came to what God wanted and didn’t want for me. I’d been raised by conservative Christian parents who still didn’t know I was gay, and it was bad enough that many Latino families were traditional-minded like mine. I’d been fed with so much toxic crap from the Pentecostal church I’d been forced to attend that I’d ended up embracing the gay guy I’d always been as I’d gotten older. Now, I wondered if there was something else to embrace, something new and foreign and exciting, but wrong at the same time.
I was still anything but soft down there, more like semi-hard and in need of attention. It was too early to go to bed, I’d already eaten dinner, and I’d binged way too many series on Netflix, Hulu, and Prime. I supposed I could work on finishing the next chapter for “Something Like Fate.”
I grabbed my laptop and opened the Word document. I tried typing something, but nothing really came out. I stared at the blank screen for minutes until I tried typing again and still nothing. I blew a hard breath of frustration and set aside the laptop. In the previous chapter, I’d left off with Luigi having something important to tell Mario, something he’d been struggling with for some time, and that he’d prayed he wouldn’t lose Mario over it. I had some ideas written in the padded story bible for the series, since the story was told in Mario’s point of view, and the reader wouldn’t know what Luigi was hiding.
I grabbed my laptop again and tried typing one of the ideas, but after a short opening paragraph that revealed Luigi’s secret, I couldn’t seem to make it work. I just wasn’t satisfied. I tried another idea, and the same thing happened. What was going on? Why couldn’t I just make something up? Anything! It was what I’d gotten stuck with for being a “pantser,” filling up the story bible as I went along, instead of plotting everything first like I probably should’ve done. After several more attempts, I gave up and abandoned my laptop. I threw myself onto the bed. I had days left to finish the chapter, and I suddenly felt the pressure getting to me. What if I missed a week for the first time and risked disappointing my readers? Or worse, started losing readers altogether? What could Luigi’s secret be? What, what, what!
I sighed and grabbed my phone. I looked at Gary’s picture again, and my erection came back to life. The heck with this. I needed to release with my blue balls killing me. There was no way I’d be able to sleep if I went to bed all hot and bothered. God would understand.
Gary invaded my thoughts for the umpteenth time. I pictured him wearing a full mask or some kind of head covering, seeing as how I had no idea what he looked like. The mystery intrigued me, though. What exactly did he look like? No, no, I kind of didn’t want to know. He’d also probably wear some kind of leather outfit like a typical Master. What room would we be in? Wait…we? No, no, what room would he and his sub be in? He liked spanking, too. Of course, he did because he was a sick pervert. He wrote all those profane reviews about books that filled his head with dirty and nasty thoughts.
I twitched down there at the thought of his perverted nature in combination with the memory of our naughty chat. I pushed my boxer briefs down to my ankles and started stroking while holding the phone with my other hand to focus on his hot body.
I remembered in the Dom/sub review where Gary mentioned about wanting to introduce his hypothetical sub to new things as a sexual awakening because he was apparently experienced for his age, whatever he’d meant by that. He mentioned spanking as his punishment of preference, but he admitted he’d show a lot of love right after the last reddening slap, explaining to his sub in a tender tone why he’d needed to be spanked. What was spanking like, anyway? Did it really hurt
that badly?
I stared at Gary’s pecs and nipples, and I found myself wanting to have a taste. I knew he was sweaty in the picture, but I suddenly didn’t care. Would he be ticklish or turned off like my exes had been when I’d tried to lick their nipples? They’d been very vanilla, much like I was, except they’d been much more against trying new things, unlike me. They’d even thought of swallowing and rimming as gross, whereas I frequently debated whether I’d try either of those things with the right guy. Those things seemed to be normal in gay sex from the few porn clips I’d watched before shutting them out of my life for good. Given the origin of my horniness that evening, I wondered if I was slightly less vanilla than I’d constantly told myself. Maybe more like a twist with some chocolate, like the ice cream flavor.
I imagined myself licking the sweat off Gary’s pecs, discovering the salty taste that might get me to taste him some more. I licked around his nipples, and they’d probably harden right away, the way mine already were. Maybe I’d gently bite one of them, or both. I’d definitely suck on them, though. How would my mouth make him feel? Would he enjoy the way I pleased him? Would he beg for me? No, no, he didn’t beg. He was the Dominant. Instead, I’d be the one begging. No, wait, I wasn’t the sub, the hypothetical faceless guy who didn’t exist was. What was it like being a sub anyway? What was it like giving up all control and trusting that a Dom wouldn’t take advantage of the opportunity to abuse the sub? And why did I keep replacing the hypothetical faceless sub with myself?