“That was amazing. I know you said your mom made you learn to dance. But what you just did was not something you can just learn to do. It was as if the music was an extension of you, and your body just moved where it led,” she said breathlessly.
“That’s a very accurate description of dancing. I don’t believe people can dance well without a love for music. To dance well, you have to consume the music and let it control your body, moving you as it sees fit.” I trailed my fingers across the exposed flesh of her lower back.
“Do you dance often?”
I chuckled. “Believe it or not, before Saturday, I hadn’t danced in probably 150 years.”
She picked her head up to look into my eyes and scoffed, “I find that hard to believe. You obviously enjoy letting music use your body for expression, so why did you stop dancing?”
Hmm. How did I tell her Cassandra had sucked the pleasure out of everything back then with her controlling domination over me and my talents?
I didn’t want to ruin our night with my darkness. And I didn’t want her mired in the sludge that was my past. Cassandra was still a wild card trying to come into play in my life. And I needed to protect Celesta from that.
“I went through some dark times, and everything lost its appeal. All the things I enjoyed no longer brought me joy or even contentment. Dancing had no appeal. I didn’t even know I missed it and had no desire to dance again until I saw you across that crowded room on Saturday. Now, I’m not sure I ever want to stop dancing with you.” I drew her body back more firmly against mine.
I began to move our bodies across the floor in time with the new melody that was playing. Looking around at the other couples, I noticed none of the others danced like we did. Perhaps I needed to learn some modern dance moves. It did seem as if they were having fun in their abandoned shimmying.
After spending a few more songs with Celesta in my embrace, the DJ started playing some line dancing song. Everyone on the dance floor began to organize themselves into neat rows. I started to lead Celesta to the sidelines when I felt her stop in her tracks. She tugged my hand, trying to make me fall in line. Shaking my head, I laughed. There was no way I was going to line dance.
♪ Cupid Shuffle by Cupid
“Come on, Toven,” she pleaded.
“No way. I do not line dance. But I’ll stand over there and watch you.” I pointed to an area over to the side.
She pouted but finally relented. I watched her move through the intricate steps timed perfectly to the rhythm of the song. Her face was filled with complete joy. I could watch her all night and feel totally at peace.
Peace was foreign for me as of late. Before Celesta, my mind had been consumed with my failing music career, the embezzlement from my company and the ever-ticking clock reminding me that I was running out of time. But since Celesta, all those things had taken a backseat in my mind. She consumed all my conscious and subconscious thoughts.
Somehow, Ace had managed to wiggle himself into the spot next to Celesta in line. He was keeping time with the crowd of organized dancers as if he’d done this a million times. Who knew, maybe he had?
I envied his easygoing, nonchalant nature. He didn’t seem concerned if he looked like a fool or not. He was out there having a blast and laughing with my girl.
Not my girl. My pretend girl. Crap. I needed the dance to end so I could get her back in my arms and away from his boyish charms and devastating good looks.
When the song ended, Celesta started walking to where I waited. Ace trailed behind her, still talking. Just as they reached me, the DJ played the first truly slow song of the evening.
“I’ve come to claim my dance,” the pretty boy stated.
If looks could kill, he would’ve vaporized in front of us. But I had to honor my word. I gave Celesta a curt nod.
She pulled my face down, so she could whisper in my ear. “I expect you to dance with me next, even if it is a line dance to some terribly corny song like the ‘Chicken Dance’.”
She pecked the corner of my lips quickly and followed Ace to the dance floor. I was still staring dumbfoundedly at her as Ace held her close and swayed in time with the music. My stomach churned as I watched him hold her and whisper in her ear. And then when she smiled at him, I felt like someone had sucker punched me.
What was this feeling, and where did it come from?
18
Celesta
Line dancing was a nice release. I adored dancing with Toven, having him hold me close and command my body to follow his lead. But it also made me anxious—anxious for more and nervous about what would happen if I actually got that more. Toven made me feel things I didn’t understand. A lack of understanding had always incited fear in my heart. The closer he was to me in proximity, the more intense the feelings were. And I was pretty sure I was ready to say to hell with it and beg him to make me his.
Being in Ace’s friendly embrace muddled things in my mind. On the one hand, it was nice and effortless to spend time with Ace. My emotions weren’t a riot and, I could just be. But on the other hand, it felt incredibly wrong to be in his arms. In the short time I’d spent with Toven, he’d come to own a piece of me. And it made me feel disloyal to him to enjoy spending time with another man.
My mind knew he and I were only pretending to be a couple; however, my heart seemed to have not gotten the memo. Ten weeks of this was going to leave me irrevocably broken.
“Penny for your thoughts,” Ace’s friendly voice snapped me out of my reverie.
I chuckled. How was he to know his direct comment would cycle my thoughts right back to where they’d wandered away to?
“Just thinking about Toven,” I admitted honestly.
He placed his hand over his heart. “You wound me,” he said in mock pain.
I swatted his muscular chest. “Oh, you.”
“What about Toven?”
I couldn’t unload on a stranger. I didn’t know Ace, but I really did long for a friend to confide in and bounce my thoughts off of. I didn’t have any friends in the area. And all my friends back home disappeared with the scandal involving my dad.
I shook my head to dislodge that thought train. Not wanting to provoke more curiosity from Ace, I plastered a fake smile on my face.
“You don’t have to answer. But why don’t I take a stab at it, and you can let me know when I say something wrong?” he offered.
“OK,” I whispered.
“I know from your bio in the book that you’re almost done with your degree. So, I’m guessing the reason you signed up for this whole thing was to pay your tuition, because you certainly don’t seem the type who’s looking to add some danger to her life. Right so far?”
I nodded.
“Toven is a big name in the music industry, so I’m sure the career opportunities he can put in front of you are tremendous. So, though I was deeply hurt you didn’t accept my offer, I understand his was probably the best choice for your future. I’m guessing what you didn’t bargain on when you signed up for this was to actually like one of our kind as a person?” His gaze penetrated me, seeking the truth I didn’t want to own.
I barely nodded in shame. Having spent time with Toven, I saw my preconceptions were very wrong, and I was embarrassed I’d judged him inaccurately.
“And even more to your surprise, you don’t just like him as a person, you’re developing feelings for him. And those feelings scare you?” He continued to move us around the dance floor beneath the weight of Toven’s stare.
“Yes.”
“Oh, Celesta. Feelings scare everyone, especially when you aren’t prepared for them,” he said, his tone soothing and understanding.
“Yeah.” I couldn’t really say more. I didn’t know what to say.
He smiled sweetly at me. “If you ever want to talk, I’m a good listener. There’s more to me than a pretty face and a sexy body. I can be a good friend, and you look like you need a friend.”
“Thanks.”
“What’s
your number, so I can text you and give you mine?” he asked abruptly.
I rattled off my cell without thinking.
“You look really beautiful tonight.” His fingers squeezed mine as he stared at me.
I was grateful for the subject change. “Thanks.” I kept my gaze slightly downcast.
“It looked like you enjoyed line dancing,” he prodded.
“Oh, I did. I used to go with my friends back home.”
He spun my body out from his and pulled me back in like a yo-yo. “And you seem to be enjoying dancing with me.”
“A friendly dance with you is nice,” I admitted with a smile.
“But you’d rather be dancing with Toven?” he asked, cutting to the heart of the matter.
I shrugged. “Sorry.”
“I get it. Any fool would get it if they watched the two of you. You guys move like magic. It’s like you were made for each other, which sounds like some chick flick nonsense, but I can’t think of another way to explain it. It isn’t something I or even the rest of my kind believes in. But watching you two, even knowing your relationship is in its infancy, makes me think you may not be the only one who has misconceptions about some things.”
I didn’t know what to say. Toven was playing his role well, but I wasn’t playing. I already had real feelings—feelings which would get me hurt.
Ace pressed my head to his chest and continued moving us to the beat of the love song. The gravity of Toven’s gaze stroked my skin the whole time. He managed to heat my blood with just a simple look. I caught his eye on a passing twirl. His gaze was hungry and something else, which I didn’t understand.
When the song ended, Ace delivered me back to Toven’s side. Toven drew me in the moment I stepped away from Ace.
“Thanks for letting me borrow your girl for a dance, Toven.” Ace gripped Toven’s shoulder as a friend would.
“You’re welcome. You looked nice together,” he admitted grudgingly.
“Maybe, but not as good as the two of you did.”
“Speaking of, I think I owe my girl another dance.” He found my eyes and smiled enormously.
My heart rate spiked. Both men turned to stare at me. But I couldn’t think about the looks on either of their faces. Toven had said my girl. And I wanted it to be the truth more than I’d ever wanted anything before, even the pony I’d begged for when I was six.
“Let’s dance,” I whispered to get away from their scrutiny.
Oddly enough, the DJ played another slow song. As soon as the lyrics started, Toven cocked his head in contemplation. When he heard “You’re the color of my blood,” he raised a single brow, but he didn’t smirk or scoff.
Blood Song: Prelude (Blood Song Series Book 1) Page 23