by K. C. Crowne
She meant it. I walked over to her, my hands on her shoulders. She kept her chin up high, and she seemed determined, but there were still tears in her eyes.
She was desperate. And I couldn’t do this. I just couldn’t.
“No,” I said. I held up a hand to stop her from arguing. “Not unless you’re sure. I don’t want you to do it out of a sense of obligation, but because you’re truly okay with it. If you’re not, that’s fine. The money is yours regardless. You don’t have to do this, it’s too much to ask and I realize it now.”
“I can’t take the money for free.”
“And I won’t let you sign up to have my kid if it’s only because you need the money,” I said.
“Abe, please—”
I wiped a tear that fell from her eye, my hand on her cheek. She leaned into that touch, and I was surprised when she didn’t pull away. She closed her eyes and heaved a deep sigh.
My heart broke for her.
She was a good woman, a sweet person who deserved better than the crap she was dealing with. I wanted desperately to help her.
I also wanted to stop the tears from falling.
She nibbled her lower lip, and my gaze fell upon her mouth. So pink, so soft. I wondered what it might feel like, what she would taste like.
I don’t know what got into me, but I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers.
I only wanted to stop the tears.
But she kissed me back, opening her mouth to mine, and I couldn’t stop.
God knows, I should have stopped.
Felicity
Abe’s beard brushed against my face, tickling my skin. It was softer than I expected it to be, as was the hair on his head. My hands were entangled in his locks, pulling him into me.
Until that moment, I had forgotten how good it felt to kiss someone, and to be kissed.
It had been since culinary school that I’d been with anyone. So three, maybe four years? Jesus, that should be illegal.
All of those years of going without the touch of a man made me crave Abe even more.
And let’s face it, it was also Abe - a man that I had admired and dreams about for the last year or so since he first walked into my diner.
His tongue brushed against mine, and it felt like he sucked all the air out of me. My heart raced in my chest, and I didn’t even realize that my hands had no moved lower, fumbling with his belt.
His hands slipped underneath my shirt, hungrily reaching for my bra. He unsnapped it, and my breasts fell free. He pulled off my shirt and tossed it to the side, lowering his face to my breasts.
I’d always thought I had nice breasts - they were round and fairly large D cups. My friends had always joked that I was blessed in the chest.
Abe was certainly enjoying them, his mouth exploring every inch until he took one of my nipples between his lips.
I audibly gasped, throwing my head back as I moaned.
His tongue moved over my nipple, and it felt like he was licking somewhere much lower. My panties were getting wetter by the minute.
And in that moment I needed him more than I needed anything in my entire life.
I grabbed ahold of his head, pulling him up to kiss me again, pressing my bare breasts against the roughness of his white coat.
Abe made quick work of my pants, slipping them off me. He lifted me up and sat me down on his desk, knocking a coffee mug to the carpet. Whether it broke or not, I didn’t notice.
Nor did I care.
All I cared about was getting him inside of me.
He slipped his pants down, just enough to free his erection. I had only a second to take him in, to see just how big he was, before he thrust against me. Our bodies collided, and he rubbed that thick member against my pussy lips.
My insides were crying out to be filled by him. He grabbed his member and guided it toward my opening, teasing it with the tip before parting my lips and sliding inside of me.
His cock stretched me open, and I cried out as he buried himself deep inside of me.
“Yes, yes,’ I whimpered.
At long last, I had what I needed.
My nails dug into his back. He was still wearing his lab coat and shirt underneath it, which was a shame. But we’d had no time to remove all that.
His lips smashed against mine as his cock moved in and out of my body, fucking me with precision and desperation.
He’d been single for as long as I knew him, so I wondered - had it been a long time for him too? The way he fucked me, I believed so
He was desperate and hungry.
Just like me. It didn’t take long for my first orgasm to wash over me, hitting me hard as I moaned, burying my face into the crook of his neck to silence the screams that were trying to escape.
Abe grabbed my hips and held me down onto the desk, even as my body trembled and quaked with pleasure. He held me in place as he continued fucking me.
After my orgasm subsided, he slipped out of me. I whimpered, “No, please, don’t stop.”
I still needed more of him.
And his hungry smile let me know he wasn’t done with me either.
“Turn around,” he growled.
I slid down from the desk and did as I was told, bending over with my ass in the air. Abe stepped up behind me, grabbing ahold of my hips and guiding himself back inside of me.
I cried out as he entered me from behind, going even deeper than before.
My head fell forward, hitting the desk as he jackhammered in and out of me. Abe reached down, grabbing my hair, helping to lift my head up. He lowered his head, kissing my back as he fucked me with the same desperation as before.
“Your ass is perfection,” he growled. “Everything about you. Just so fucking perfect.”
I’d never heard him talk this way before. Abe was always so professional, so clean-cut. Hearing those words from him, along with his heavy breathing and animalistic growls, sent me over the edge again. He let go of my hair, and my head fell forward again. I gripped the edge of the desk as I came, my body writhing in pleasure underneath him.
And Abe slammed himself inside of me one last time.
His cock pulsed inside of me, throbbing as he spilled himself into me.
We came together like that, on his desk in his office. And it was the best orgasm of my entire life. Nothing had ever come close to making me feel as good as he did in that moment.
He held me there like that for a moment, our bodies taking a minute to return to normal. My breathing eventually slowed, and Abe helped me to stand - even though my legs felt like jelly. He chuckled as I fell into him, and he had to hold me up.
He gave me a quick kiss, but I saw it in his eyes right away.
Regret.
“Felicity, I’m—”
“You don’t have to say it,” I said, stepping away from him. I steadied myself against his desk. “I know, this can’t happen again.”
“Right,” he said. “I’m not looking for anything serious.”
“Neither am I,” I lied. Well, it was only a partial lie. I wasn’t looking too seriously, but it would be nice to find someone. My head was still spinning, I wasn’t making a whole lot of sense, even to myself.
“Good,” he said. “So while that was amazing, we probably shouldn’t let it happen again.”
“I agree. We shouldn’t do that again, unless— Well, unless I’m going to give you a baby, I guess—”
Abe held a hand up. “I’m don’t want you to make a decision about that right now. You need to think long and hard about this, and unless I’m 100% certain you mean it, that you’re doing this because you want to and not just for the money, it won’t be an option. And even if it is, we will go through a clinic and IVF—”
“Oh yeah, right,” I blushed for having temporarily forgotten about IVF. For some reason, I’d assumed we’d do things the old-fashioned way. How silly of me, I thought. This wasn’t a personal thing - it was meant to be a business transaction, of sorts. I needed to remember that if we w
ere to do this. I couldn’t get too close to him; it was all just clinics and needles and them inserting the embryos in me. Not pregnancy like I’d always imagined it to be.
And that was better, I thought. Less risk of getting too attached or too close to Abe.
“I should get back to the diner,” I said, gathering up my clothes.
“The check is yours, regardless. Please take it.”
I didn’t even entertain that with an answer.
The answer was no.
I wouldn’t take handouts, not from anyone.
I got dressed and avoided Abe’s eyes as he led me to the door. Of course, by then, nurses and other staff had started to arrive. I never experienced the so-called Walk of Shame in college, but there was a first time for everything.
I’m sure they’d heard us.
I’m sure they knew what we'd done in there.
There’s no way they couldn’t know.
But Abe kept his head up, not even fazed by the stares from his staff. He walked confidently to the front door with me.
We didn’t say much.
There was so much we should have said, but I couldn’t stomach bringing it up.
I had a lot to think about.
Ooo000ooo
“You what?” Leah exclaimed.
I hushed her, not wanting the staff in the back of the diner to hear anything. We were still closed; the plumbing was still an issue. We’d probably be closed for a few days, at least. The inspection was likely not going to go in my favor either, not with the plumbing issues.
But Leah always came over for lunch on Wednesdays, usually for the Wednesday special. I let her in and quickly made something while Allison continued training with Gavin.
Leah had just wanted a chicken wrap and side salad, so I made it up really quickly for her. She had barely touched the food though, once I let out that I’d had sex with Abe in his office.
“Felicity, that’s amazing,” she said with a smirk. “I knew I was right about you two.”
“Yeah, I guess. But he made sure to tell me that it couldn’t happen again, and I know that it can’t.”
“That’s what you guys say now, but with that kind of chemistry between you — it’s bound to happen again.”
“It can’t.”
I hadn’t mentioned the rest of it yet, about the surrogacy. Allison’s opinion had helped a lot, but she was young. She’d never been pregnant. Leah had a child of her own along with her stepdaughter, Matilda.
She might have some insight that Allison wouldn’t have.
I bit my lip and stared at my hands, picking at my thumbnail as I tried to think of the best way to phrase my question.
“Uh oh, what’s that look for?” Leah asked, picking up on my mood right away.
“It’s just— well, Abe asked me to do something for him, and I’m not sure about it. Like, I want to help him out, and it would help me in a lot of ways too, but it’s asking a lot.”
“I need more details than that, babe.”
I sighed and closed my eyes. I spit everything out, downplaying the need for money since I didn’t want Leah to offer her own money.
“So, Abe offered me 30k initially, then upped it to 50k, if I’d be his surrogate, but also offered the cash to me even if I chose not to do it. There’s no strings attached, but I can’t, in good faith, take that amount of money without doing something in return.”
When I opened my eyes, I found Leah staring at me with raised eyebrows.
“What?” I asked.
“He wants you to have his baby?”
“Yes, but as a surrogate. I wouldn’t be in the baby’s life or anything, merely carrying the child and using my eggs, I assume.”
“Are you comfortable with that?”
“Honestly? I don’t know. I mean, part of me thinks it would be a nice gesture, if he wants a family, you know? He’s definitely got the financial assets to care for a child, so I’m not worried about that.”
“But would he make a good father?”
“I think so.”
“Well, I would hope you’d feel more confident about that answer if you’re going to have his baby,” Leah said.
“You’re right,” I sighed. “But what do you think? Do you think it’s crazy that I’d even consider it?”
Leah reached out and took my hands in hers, offering me a sympathetic smile. “No, I don’t think you’re crazy. Surrogacy is a gift to those who can’t have children of their own; it’s an incredibly generous act. Only you can make that decision, and I support you either way. But I think you need to be sure about this - and the first step would be to vet Abe, make sure you’d be comfortable with him raising a child you carried. I think that might be the first step if you’re seriously considering this.”
I nodded and reached for my phone. “You’re absolutely right. I don’t have to make this decision in a vacuum, I need to look at everything before deciding.”
“Who are you calling?” she asked.
“Abe. So we can talk about this. I won’t tell him what I’m doing, but I want to meet him - in his home - and get to know him on a personal level, see if that has any effect on my decision.”
“Good girl,” Leah said, patting my hand.
She turned her attention to her lunch as I stepped outside.
I took a deep breath and dialed Abe’s office number.
A receptionist answered.
“Doctor Hammond’s office, this is Kayla speaking.”
“Yes, may I speak with Dr. Hammond, please?”
“May I ask who’s calling?”
“Tell him it’s Felicity James,” I said.
The receptionist put me on hold, and I nibbled my fingernail as I paced on the sidewalk. After a moment, Abe picked up.
“Felicity, is everything okay?”
“Yes, everything is fine. Can we meet up at some point to talk? About the surrogacy thing, of course. I just want to make sure I have all the information before I make a decision.”
“Sure,” Abe said. “But you know you can call my personal number, right?”
“I don’t have it.”
“Well you will now. And yes, we can meet up. Tell me a time and a place.”
“Your house, preferably. Tonight, around seven maybe?”
“Alright. We can do that. I can make you dinner, but I can’t promise it’s anywhere near as good as your cooking.”
“That’s fine,” I said, finding myself smiling without meaning to.
Why did this man make me smile, even when my heart was heavy? Why, of all the men to give me butterflies in my gut, did it have to be a man I couldn’t have?
I’d never understand it, but I guess I didn’t really have to. I just had to be careful. I could see myself falling for Abe easily, and the last thing I needed, on top of everything else that had broken on me, was a broken heart.
Abe
“Come on in, I hope you don’t mind dogs?” I had talked about Koda with her before but wasn’t sure if she remembered or even paid much attention to my ramblings about my Golden Retriever. Felicity didn’t have a dog, as far as I could tell.
She walked inside, and I had to admit, I loved seeing her out of her work clothes. Tonight, she was in a pair of jeans that hugged her ass nicely and a soft, pink sweater accentuated all her best assets. She was a curvy girl, and not afraid to hide it either. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a French braid that fell down her back.
“Oh no, I love them,” Felicity said, proving that she really could get more perfect. I had to kick myself for having that thought.
No one was perfect. No one. She had flaws; I just wasn’t seeing them yet.
Felicity dropped to her knees, and my old boy looked to me for a cue. I nodded my head and he moved in closer to her, sniffing her face and giving her a chance to back away before giving it a gentle lick.
“Wow, so well behaved,” she said, giving him a scratch behind his ears.
“Koda is a therapy dog,” I said. “He wa
tches me for cues as to what he can and can’t do, since every child is different.”
“Therapy dog?” Felicity stayed on the ground, petting him.
“Yeah, we visit children’s hospitals mostly, but sometimes nursing homes as well,” I said. “I did some research into how animals can help stressful situations and calm children during scary medical procedures. At the very least, he gets them to smile, but sometimes he’s there for comfort during shots or tests, to take the kids minds off what’s happening.”
“You continue to amaze me,” she said, standing up.
And you do the same for me, I thought, but I didn’t say out loud.
“Well good thing Koda impressed you before dinner, since I fear my cooking won’t stand up to yours.”
“Oh hush,” she said, waving me off. “It smells really good in here.”
She followed me into the kitchen, where I had to check on the pork tenderloin in the oven.
Koda was right behind her, and when he saw me whip out the food, his eyes widened. He never begged, but he was still an animal and I could see the desire for the meat in his eyes.
I wondered if Felicity could see the desire in my eyes like that. I sure hoped not. We couldn’t repeat what had happened at my office the other day.
“Mmm looks delicious as well,” Felicity said, standing not too far away.
“It’s ready whenever you’d like to eat,” I said, slicing into the tender meat.
“I think I can speak for Koda and myself that we’re ready whenever you are.”
I chuckled as I prepared the plates - I had made fried green beans and bacon and garlic mashed potatoes on the side. Probably my most impressive meal, but for someone who went to one of the best culinary schools in the world, it was probably a pretty amateur dish.
I gave her a choice of red or white wine - Pinot Noir or Chardonnay. She chose the Pinot.
I’d met many chefs in my lifetime, and almost all of them would critique a meal regardless if you asked them to or not. They could taste the subtle flavors many of us laymen missed, or they knew exactly what the dish was missing.