by K. C. Crowne
Not like I wanted to be.
I’d been having some doubts for a while but seeing them on the screen made it even harder to imagine letting them go one day. How could I part with these three special beings that were literally apart of my body for nine months?
“Dinner is served,” Abe said, pulling me from my thoughts.
We’d taken to eating in the living room, mainly because it was more comfortable, and the fire was nice. The couch was better on my back.
He brought in two plates of meatloaf with mashed potatoes and green beans.
“It’s my mother’s recipe. First time trying it, so go easy on me, please.”
“It smells delicious,” I said, and it wasn’t a lie. “I haven’t had meatloaf since I was a child.”
“They didn’t teach you the fine art of meatloaf in culinary school?”
I chuckled as I dove into the meal. “No, can’t say that they did.”
“Well then, maybe I can still impress you yet.”
He sat beside me on the couch - both too close and too far away for my liking. We had trays that he’d picked up so we could eat in the living room. It felt a lot like my own childhood, and I had a hard time imagining Abe’s family eating meatloaf in front of the coach on television trays, but there we were.
And it was nice.
Koda was not too far away, his eyes watching us even though he never begged. He was too well-behaved for that. Abe had raised him well.
“You’re quiet tonight,” he asked. “What’s up?”
“Nothing, just tired,” I lied.
He cocked his head to the side and gave me a look that said he knew better. “Are you sure?”
I knew Abe would want some answer from me, and probably wouldn’t let it go until I said something. Not wanting to dive into the big concerns in my mind - that I was growing too attached to both him and the babies - I decided to focus on another issue that had been bothering me lately.
“I worry about the restaurant,” I said. “I know I won’t be able to do as much as I need to, and I’m worried it’s going to fall apart on me again. I fear that I won’t have a career to go back to after this.”
And after handing the babies over to him, my career was all I’d have, I thought to myself. I kept that little bit to myself.
“But Allison and Gavin seem to be doing alright?”
“Yeah, but they can’t do it alone,” I said. “I need to make sure there’s at least one or two other people who can step up.”
“You have plenty of staff that can and will step up, Felicity. I have no doubt. People love you.”
I moved the green beans around on my plate a bit. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“What else is on your mind?”
“I just-- well, I know it’s silly, but I always had the dream of opening something bigger. A fine dining restaurant, perhaps in Salt Lake City if Liberty couldn’t support it, but I think with the recent tourism boom we’ve been seeing lately, it could do very well.”
“I think you’re right. A lot of tourists with money end up driving out of town to eat,” he said.
“That’s what I thought too. And well, as much as I like diner food, sometimes I want to do more, you know?”
I looked over at him, and he nodded.
“I know all too well. I had those same dreams. That’s why I ended up giving up my steady job at the hospital years ago to work with Doctors Without Borders. And why I eventually opened my own clinic in town too. I think it’s good to always have goals.”
“Me too,” I said. “I just don’t know how realistic mine are.”
Abe scooted closer to me, taking me by surprise. “What do you need to make it happen, Felicity?”
“Nope. No, we’re not having this conversation. You’re not going to give me more money so I can--”
“I am planning on paying you more anyway.”
“Still, that’s too much.”
I decided to shut down the conversation before it went much further. I focused on eating instead, and I tried hard to ignore the gorgeous man sitting oh so close to me.
“Are you finished?” he asked, after I put my fork down. My plate was completely empty.
“Yes,” I said, going to stand up. “But I’ve got it. I can do dishes tonight.”
He’d stood up just at the same time as I had, both of us standing in front of my plate. Both of our hands on it, our fingers touching.
I stared up into his eyes, planning to argue with him. But his lips pressed into mine, and I opened myself up to him.
All thoughts of pushing him away were gone. I’d fought it for weeks now, but in that moment, I was weak for him. I wanted him, and I fell into the fantasy that I could have him.
After all, he was kissing me right then and there. His hands moved over my body, pulling my sweater off over my head and tossing it to the ground.
I found myself moving back with him, as his lips moved across my cheeks, down my neck and covering every inch of bare flesh as his hands explored the rest of me.
“Abe--”
His fingertips circled my belly button, moving lower. Oh God, I was so wet. My panties were dripping, and I wanted him more than anything else in the world right then.
“Yes?” he asked, nibbling my ear lobe. It sent a shiver down my spine and I whimpered.
“We should--” I had a chance to stop it all, but I didn’t. “We should go to the bedroom.”
Abe helped me down the hallway, his hands guiding me as he groped at my body, hugging all of my extra curves as if he couldn’t tear his hands away from them.
The next thing I knew, we were in his bedroom, and I was removing his clothing, piece by piece. He removed my leggings - slipping them down as he fell to the floor.
“God, you’re so beautiful,” he said, staring up at me, naked and feeling huge.
My hands dropped to my rounder belly, and his hands found mine. He raised himself up on his knees and kissed my tummy, while I ran my hands through his hair.
He moved lower, gently guiding me backward to the bed. I sat down and Abe positioned himself between my legs, moving lower and lower with his kisses.
I fell backward onto the bed as he dove between my thighs. His tongue found my clit right away, and he knew exactly what to do with it. He circled and teased it, causing me to writhe against the bed. My legs were over his shoulders, and my heels dug into his back.
“Yes, yes, Abe,” I whimpered, grabbing at the blanket with my hands, needing something to hold onto as his tongue explored my pussy. “Oh God--”
My words turned to cries of pleasure as he brought me to orgasm. I came so hard and so fast, weeks of desire built up and needing to be released. I gripped him so tightly with my legs, pulling him into me as pleasure washed over my body. I didn’t even realize I was doing it until afterward, when I relaxed against the bed, releasing him from the vice grip of my thick thighs.
Abe stared up at me, his face soaking wet with my juices. He licked himself clean, and I knew I had to have more.
Abe stood, and with my legs still over the bed, positioned himself between my legs. He stood before me, naked and glorious, the muscles in his chest and abs rippling as he positioned himself against me. I felt the head of his cock against my opening, and then he thrust into me, holding onto my hips to keep me steady against him.
I cried out, shaking as he filled me up. My body had wanted this for so long, I practically came just from being penetrated by him.
He fucked me from a standing position, careful to not put any weight on my belly. His hands moved over my naked body though - stroking my belly, teasing my nipples. My breasts were more sensitive than ever. In fact, everything was more sensitive, I could hardly take it.
He plunged into me over and over again, bringing me to orgasm a second time. My hips lifted off the bed, my back arching upward as I came. He held onto my ass, his hands gripping it tightly and keeping me in place as he kept up the rhythm, drawing out my orgasm until I almost couldn’
t take it.
Once it subsided, he pulled out of me and climbed into the bed with me. He rolled me over on my side, spooning me from behind. He guided himself back inside of me, snuggled up against me.
His hands moved over my body, while one made its way to my clit. Slowly and gently, he moved in and out of me from behind while playing with me. One hand was on my belly, gently stroking the skin. His mouth kissed and nibbled on the back of my neck, his groans shaking from deep within his chest.
I’d never felt something so intimate in all of my life. The sex had always been good with Abe, but this was a whole new level. I’d never felt closer to him.
I’d never felt closer to anyone, ever.
I closed my eyes and focused on the sounds Abe was making. His breathing was heavy, and he was moaning every time he slipped inside of me.
I love you, I thought to myself. Thankfully, I was still aware enough to not say it out loud. But it was true. I loved him, and I felt like I might explode with emotion if I didn’t say those words.
I kept them to myself, but the feeling of pressure inside of me was strong. It was building up, and I was close to yet another orgasm. Abe’s movements were more erratic now, his sounds growing louder.
He was close.
I reached around and touched his thigh, stroking his rough skin.
“Come, Abe,” I cried out. “Please, come inside me.”
Abe thrust up into me, slow and deep. I cried out as his cock pulsed inside of me, filling me with his seed. I came just thinking about it, our bodies writhing together, our moans blending in with each other’s. For the moment, we were connected on such a deep, intimate level, I almost said the three words begging to be released from my throat.
Thankfully, I couldn’t make a coherent sentence until the pleasure had died down.
And I was overcome with even more emotion than before. As Abe slipped his now deflated cock out of me, I feared the worst. Would he tell me to leave? Tears welled in my eyes as I waited for him to say something to signal I should leave.
But instead, he wrapped himself around me. Before long, his breathing was slow and steady. He’d fallen asleep, and I wasn’t too far behind him.
Abe
Dammit, Abe, I cursed myself when I woke up the next day.
Felicity was in my bed, naked and wrapped in my blankets. My body had been wrapped around hers too, spooning her and holding her close. I fought with myself to simply stay that way, butI pulled away as soon as I woke up, laying beside her and trying not to look at her.
But how could I not look at her?
At one point, the blanket had slipped off, exposing her nude figure. Her rounded belly, filled with my children. Her swollen breasts, her soft curves, her sweet, delicate face with her eyes closed as she slept peacefully.
I told myself we wouldn’t do this. Felicity deserved better than what I had to offer. I wanted to prove to her that I could take care of her without my emotions getting in the way.
She stirred awake, her eyes blinking open. She sat up in bed and seemed to have the same thought I did.
“Good morning,” I said, trying not to stare at her as the blanket fell from the top half of her body, exposing her breasts for a split second before she pulled it back up.
“Good morning.” Her voice was softer than usual.
Her hair was messier than I’d ever seen it before, standing on end with static electricity. It had to be the cutest thing I’d ever seen. Without thinking, I reached out and smoothed some of the hair down. Felicity’s head relaxed into my hand.
Dammit, Abe. She’s a hormonal pregnant woman. She’s getting attached.
Problem was, so was I.
I pulled my hand back and cleared my throat. “I should get ready for work.”
“Oh, okay,” she said, not looking up at me. “Can I ask you a question first?”
“Sure,” I said.
She finally looked up and met my gaze, and the defiant look from before was back. “Why do you keep leading me on if you don’t want anything serious? I mean, I know it’s just as much my fault, I could say no -- but you keep kissing and touching me like we’re a couple, then you act cold and distant after things progress. I can’t handle this game of tug of war forever, Abe.”
I sighed and sat back down on the bed. “I know. I’m sorry.”
“What’s going on? Please, just tell me what you want?”
I didn’t know what I wanted. I stared down at my hands.
“I’m not good in relationships, Felicity. The thing is, I’m very attracted to you, I think you’re an amazing woman and would make someone a wonderful wife someday, but--”
“But you’re not looking to settle down,” she said, finishing my sentence.
I cringed at how harsh those words sounded, coming from her.
“Yes. I’m just not sure I’m the marrying type, you know? I don’t think I’m capable of monogamy.”
I knew how it sounded. It made it seem like I was the one with the problem. That I couldn’t stay with one person for the rest of my life. That wasn’t it at all. I had no desire to play the field, it was too exhausting, and I was getting too old for that.
But I wasn’t sure I could trust someone to be faithful to me, 100% of the time for the rest of my life. And I’d had enough bullshit for one lifetime.
“I see,” Felicity said with a huff.
I looked back at her as she got out of bed. I wanted so badly to explain it all, to tell her it was my own issues, nothing to do with her. But those were cliché words to tell a woman, weren’t they? It’s not you, it’s me. No, she deserved better than that.
She deserved better than me.
“I think I need to go back to my place tonight,” she said. Before I could say anything, she continued. “The doctor said I’m fine, and I promise to work less. I just think it’s better if I stay at my own place. I’ll call you if I need anything.”
It was unfair of me to ask her to stay, especially since I couldn’t be trusted not to lead her on. I nodded, not saying another word as she left. I heard the front door open and shut, then listened for her car.
I wanted her there, with me, to make sure that she and the babies were safe.
But I also knew Felicity had to take care of herself, since I couldn’t be trusted around her.
Ooo000ooo
“You need to start thinking about the nursery,” my mother said as she stepped into my house. “I’m assuming you haven’t done anything for that yet?”
“We still have time, mom,” I said. “And it’s nice seeing you too. What do I owe the pleasure of your unannounced visit?”
“I wanted to drop something off,” she said, handing me the bag she was holding. “For the babies, of course.”
I had told my mother about her being a grandmother as soon as I felt safe telling her the news. Of course, I didn’t tell her the details - just that I had a surrogate. When she found out that there were going to be three babies instead of just the one, she was over-the-moon. An instant family, she told me. And she was right. I’d go from a single man to a father of three kids, just like that.
I knew we’d still be a family, even though I would be a single parent, but it felt weird for me to call it an instant family.
Because something was missing.
I tried not to think about that too much though.
“Can I see the room?” she asked.
“Sure, but it’s still a guest room for now,” I said.
I hadn’t had a chance to do much with it since Felicity left but didn’t give it a second thought. I took the bag, which came from some high-end boutique from the looks of it and carried it toward the soon-to-be nursery. My mother was behind me. Koda lifted his head and looked at her from the couch, but my mother was not much of a dog person, and Koda barely wagged his tail. He laid back down, seemingly disappointed by it not being Felicity.
Or maybe I was projecting.
I opened the door, and my mother rushed inside. I noticed
that the bed was made, but barely. And on the floor, almost underneath the bed, was a pair of pink panties. My eyes fell on them just as my mother walked over to it.
“What’s this--” as soon as she realized it, she dropped the panties and frowned.
“I’m assuming you had a guest recently?”
“Yes, the mother of the babies had a scare,” I said. “I felt more comfortable with her staying here.”
My mom cocked an eyebrow and the frown quickly turned into a grin. I knew what she was thinking, and I tried to change the subject by opening up the bag and looking at the contents.
There were several frilly little dresses, much too big for a newborn, along with some boy’s clothes as well. I laughed. “We don’t even know what we’re having.”
“Yes, but with that many babies, there’s a good chance you’ll have at least one of each. They’re not identical, correct?”
“No, they’re not.”
“That’s what I thought,” my mother said. “So about the mother -- I’ve heard an interesting rumor about Felicity James over at the diner. She wouldn’t be the surrogate, would she?”
I don’t know why but coming clean to my mother about this was harder than it should have been. Not because I was ashamed, but because I knew she would give me some crap about it - as in, trying to push Felicity and I together when I clearly didn’t need any help in that department.
“Uh, yes, but before you get any ideas, it’s purely a business arrangement.”
My mother grinned even wider now, like she knew something I didn’t. “I see the way you two look at each other. Call it whatever you want, but I’m no fool, Abe.”
“Neither am I. I’m not a stupid teenager anymore, I know what’s best for me and what’s best for Felicity. Don’t get your hopes up.”