Gribblebob's Book of Unpleasant Goblins

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Gribblebob's Book of Unpleasant Goblins Page 4

by David Ashby


  “A bit like your dog!” jumped in Nils, smiling.

  “No,” said the little man, looking puzzled.

  “So if that’s your world, why are you here?” Anna asked quickly.

  “Got tired of it all. Fairies are blooming boring after a while. Dragon poo all over the place. Magic this and magic that… I like it here. Not too keen on you lot, which is why I keep my distance, but I like how different it is from my world.”

  “You still haven’t explained about the veil,” said Nils.

  “Ah, yes, the veil. Well, that’s what we call it, the wall between this world and my world. There are certain places you can break through, where you can cross from one world to the other. You just have to know where they are and what to do. And that’s called ‘breaking the veil’, not that you’re really meant to, but—”

  “Show us,” interrupted Anna.

  “Show you?!” snorted the little man.

  “Yes, show us, so we’ll know it’s all true.”

  Nils put his hand up. “Um. What about my hand?”

  “Oh. I’d forgotten about that,” said Anna. “Sorry, Nils.”

  Nils harrumphed.

  CHAPTER 17

  William wiped the last drop of bloodshroom juice from his lips and sat back in his chair.

  “So now you know why I need you to cross the veil with me.”

  Jack had been sitting in stunned silence, but now he leant forward and looked very intently into William’s eyes.

  “But… that’s impossible.”

  “What? Crossing the veil with me, or The Book of All Tomorrow’s Dreams going missing?” William smiled.

  “Both.”

  William simply carried on smiling and waited for Jack to continue.

  “What makes you so sure that the book has been taken across the veil?” Jack finally asked.

  “You know me, Jack. I have sources. I have contacts. I know people. People tell me things. People trust me.”

  “Only fools trust you, William Wynn. As I well know.”

  Jack gave William a particularly meaningful glare as he said this, and William’s face lost its almost permanent look of gentle amusement. He lowered his eyes and scratched his cheek, just below his right eye, with a long fingernail.

  “Hmm,” was all William said, before he recovered his composure and looked back up at Jack with a grin. “Well, that’s as maybe. But the fact is that people do tell me things, and I happen to know that the book has been taken ’cross the veil. And I have an idea where it might be, and why it might be there, and who it might be with. And I also have an idea that if I—if we—can find the book and return it to where it belongs, there will be tremendous benefits for us. For both of us.”

  “But mainly for you, I’d wager.”

  William’s smile retreated once more.

  “I have debts I need to pay, Jack, you know that. I need your help. I can’t get the book back without you. And you know how dangerous it could be if the book gets into the wrong hands. There have been signs already. You’ve noticed. I can tell.”

  Jack thought of the strange thoughts he’d been having since he woke up under the tree. Late for tea. Mandy Musgrave. Oscar Oakheart.

  “Can you now?”

  “I know you, Jack. I know you better than I know anyone.”

  “And I know you, William Wynn. Don’t forget that. I know you. I know the little boy who came into my home and charmed my parents with his smile and his laugh and his pretty tricks.”

  William’s face clouded slightly. “And you, Jack, didn’t I charm you too?”

  “Yes, and me, of course.”

  “We had fun, didn’t we, when we were small?”

  Jack said nothing.

  “So, you see,” said William sharply, snapping back to the matter at hand. “The book has to be found. You and me, Jack. Like old times. Like—”

  “Those times are gone, William. Those times ended that day in the Stormlands when you left me with a dovestone arrowhead in my shoulder, a swarmwind bearing down on me and a long walk home.”

  William’s smile vanished altogether, and there was real hurt in his eyes.

  “You know why, Jack. My sister. It was a chance to find my sister.”

  “And wasn’t I all but your brother, William?”

  There was a moment of silence long enough for a bright glitter of tears to be seen forming in William’s eyes. And then he replied. “Of course. Always.”

  Jack shook his head. “That dog has howled, William, but getting the book back is important, for everybody. So I’ll help you. But it isn’t going to be like old times.”

  William blinked away the tears and nodded. “Then let’s go.”

  CHAPTER 18

  Nils, Anna, Dimple and Gribblebob—or Robert Gribble, depending on how you looked at it—were making their way back past Timberton Woods, towards the park. They had agreed that before doing anything about Nils’s hand, the little man would show them the other side of the veil. He needed to fetch something from the other side anyway, he said, to help with getting all the magic back into the book from Nils’s hand.

  “How long will it take?” asked Nils, as they walked along the path. “Won’t Mum and Dad be worried?”

  Anna shook her head. “Remember, they were both going over to Uncle Oscar’s after work, to help him put all that new flat-pack furniture together.”

  “Oh yeah,” said Nils, remembering the breakdown Uncle Oscar had over a rocking chair that ended up rocking side to side rather than back and forth. “He never has much luck with those sorts of things, does he?”

  “Anyway,” continued Anna, “they said they were going to have a takeaway together afterwards and wouldn’t be back until late, so we were going to get our own tea tonight. But I’ve left them a note on the fridge to say we’ve gone back to the park for a bit, just in case they come home early.”

  “Very antique,” said Gribblebob. “I thought you lot all had your thumbjabbering machines to leave each other vexed messages and M&Ms.”

  “M&Ms?” questioned Anna. “You mean the sweet?”

  “Huh?” said Gribblebob, his wild eyebrows shooting up to his baseball cap. “I suppose they could be sweet. Depends what they’re of, I s’pose.”

  “I think he means MMSs,” said Nils, “on the phone.”

  “Oh,” said Anna. “You mean MMS, picture messages?”

  “That’s exactly what I said,” the little man replied huffily. “M&Ms. Now…” He stopped walking and the two children and the dog all stopped too. He lowered his voice and carried on speaking. “When we get there, you need to do exactly what I say, when I say it. And you might find that you feel a bit dizzy and woozy once we’ve gone through the veil. That’s quite normal, don’t panic. I know that you lot tend to panic, so don’t.”

  “So where exactly is it we’re going?” asked Anna. “The playground in the park?”

  “Not exactly. In fact, we’re nearly there. Look.” Gribblebob pointed over to the wooden outdoor gym area, right in the far corner of the park.

  “The gym?” said Nils in surprise. “We get through to the other side from the gym?”

  “That climbing frame thingy,” Gribblebob said. “On this side of the veil it looks like that, but it looks quite different on the other side. And that’s where we’re going.”

  “But why aren’t people falling into the other side all the time if it’s just through the climbing frame?” Anna asked.

  Gribblebob tapped the side of his slightly hairy nose with one stumpy finger and said, in a low voice, “Reasons.”

  “What sort of reasons?” Anna responded, as the little man started marching towards the corner of the park, Nils and Anna hurrying with him.

  “It’s like a puzzle. If you know what pieces you’re looking for, and if you know how to fit them together, then the puzzle’s puzzled and Jack’s your beansprout. If you don’t even know there’s a puzzle there, then you don’t see it and you never puzzle it. You’ll see whe
n I show you. Oh.” And the little man suddenly stopped walking again. “One thing. When I said that you’re not really meant to break the veil—well, you’re really, really not meant to break the veil. In fact, on the other side, it’s kind of against the law, and it’s especially against the law for people like me to bring people like you from this side to that side. Very against the law, in fact.”

  He was quiet. The children waited for him to continue talking, but instead he just started walking again. Anna and Nils started after him.

  “Wait,” said Anna. “What then? Are we not going through after all?”

  “Oh no, we’re going through. I said I’d show you, and I need… that thing… to help get all the magic back in my book. But if we do get caught, it’s everyone for themselves.”

  “What does that mean?” gulped Nils.

  “It means that I’ll swear on my brother’s knife that I never met hide nor hair of you before and you’ll have to answer to the Court of Naughtiness yourself.”

  Anna and Nils both broke out laughing. “The Court of Naughtiness?” giggled Anna. “That doesn’t sound at all scary. It sounds like something at a nursery school. What do they do? Put you on the naughty step for thirty minutes and stop you having your afternoon milk?”

  Gribblebob stopped again and turned to the children with an extremely serious expression on his face.

  “You may well think the Court of Naughtiness sounds funny. But I can on-shore you that it won’t be particularly funny when they carve you into statues and plant you in the Stone Field.” And with that, he was off again, leaving the children open-mouthed and slightly more nervous than they had been before.

  CHAPTER 19

  William and Jack were walking at a brisk pace through the village of Downington Upp. The moon had come up and it was a fine night. William drew many admiring glances from the villagers as they passed, and he smiled and made little half-bows as they went.

  “I see you’ve lost none of your charm,” scowled Jack.

  “Oh, come. You know they can’t help themselves. It’s my nature.”

  Jack let out a loud hoot of derision and they carried on to the outskirts of the village. They were heading to the Blew Stones: seventeen huge blue boulders that, legend had it, had been blown from the Stormlands by an angry ogre in ancient times and had landed in the random tumble they now occupied; some lying on top of others, some resting lengthways against each other, two of them sunk halfway down into the mossy ground. The moonlight was catching them well this evening and they seemed to radiate a soft, shimmering azure blue.

  “It’s a good night for it,” said William, smiling.

  “It’s a good, bright night for getting caught, you mean,” replied a stern-faced Jack.

  “Ah, you see, Jack—it is just like old times after all. You with your never-ending optimism and me with, well, this face.”

  Jack looked over at William and, for once, could not stop a very small smile touching the corners of his mouth. Despite himself, despite all that had happened, he felt a warmth for William that could never really cool. They had grown up together from when they were both seven years old. William’s parents had been killed in the Great Uprising and Jack’s father had found William crying and shaking uncontrollably by the edge of the Ruining River, his older sister nowhere to be found. The laws at that time were that shadowfolk had to live with their own kind. But there had been something in the need and desperation of that young boy’s face that outshone the darkness and ignorance of those ugly and shameful rules, and Jack’s father had gathered the trembling boy in his arms and carried him away from the river, carried him home, carried him right into the family. Yes, William was family. Despite it all.

  William noticed the small smile on Jack’s lips, and couldn’t stop himself from giving a full-force, beaming smile back. Luckily, he was able to bite his tongue and stop himself saying anything that might have damaged the moment. It had been such a long time since they had spent time together, had really spoken to one another.

  As they approached the Blew Stones, Jack looked back over his shoulder to see if anyone from the village had followed them. He knew that William had the knack of attracting followers, but thankfully tonight no one was behind them.

  “It’s been a very long time since I pierced the veil,” said Jack.

  “Whereas I still have the soil from the other side on my boots,” noted William, “so let me lead the way.”

  William went to the largest of the big, glimmering stones, one of the two that had sunk down into the earth, and placed his hand in a barely visible indent in its surface. He pushed his palm hard against the stone, feeling it cold against his skin, then pushed farther, so that his hand actually moved into the rock itself, into the space that lay just beyond the surface. He pushed again, so that his arm was as far in as his elbow. He moved his fingers around inside the empty space he couldn’t see, until he felt the tips of his fingers graze a knobble of something like hardening clay. Pushing forward a little more so that his fingers could grab a handful of the substance, he closed his hand tight around it and pulled his arm out.

  “Got it!” he said in triumph.

  Then he went to the smallest stone, one that lay across two upright stones like a gateway, on the other side of the large stone. With the hand that didn’t have a fistful of the Blew Stone innards, he stroked the surface of the stone until he found what he was looking for: a very small dip, right at the top. He moved his other hand above the dip and unclenched his fist so the drippy slime-like stuff fell into the indent. It was dark, deep-sea blue, with odd little sparkles and specks of stony silver. He patted it down smooth. As he did so, there seemed to be some sort of thrumming noise coming from the three gateway stones, and the blue glimmer in them seemed to intensify.

  “Come now,” said William. “That was quite a big handful, so we should both have time to get through.” Jack nodded as William bent low and walked through the gateway. As he did, the thrumming noise grew louder, and there was a clay-slurping noise, and all of a sudden he wasn’t there any more.

  Jack swallowed. Now it was his turn.

  CHAPTER 20

  “When you say ‘carve’, do you actually mean it or is that just an expression?” asked Anna as they caught up to the little man, who was now standing in front of the climbing frame.

  “What?” he snapped. “Oh, never mind that now.” He looked around. “It’s getting later and it’s not as bright as it was—that’s good. We don’t want too many people around. You lot tend not to notice too much of what goes on around you—what really goes on around you—but it’s still better to be flat than fluffy.”

  Nils looked at Anna questioningly, but she just shrugged.

  Gribblebob was running his hand over the smooth wood of one of the upright beams of the frame. “Now, then,” he said, “I just need to try and find the—”

  “What’s that noise?” asked Nils. Indeed, there was a low, strange, sour noise in the air, like a slightly out-of-rhythm drum beat, gradually becoming louder.

  “Well, that’s unexpected,” muttered Gribblebob, and moved back from the frame.

  As he did, and the children instinctively stepped back too, the whole climbing frame seemed to shimmer slightly, and go slightly out of focus, before the strange noise stopped and the frame came back into sharp relief. What also came into sharp relief was a tall, strange man in a bright-red frock coat, who was now stood right in the middle of the frame. He seemed to stagger slightly, before putting his hand on one of the climbing frame beams to steady himself. The dog that was halfway there barked once, Gribblebob sighed and kicked at the ground with a tetchy foot, and the children looked at each other open-mouthed.

  The tall man shook his head slightly, and stood up straight, noticing his audience for the first time. For just a few seconds he looked a little shaken, but then he made a very courteous bow, one hand at his waist, and gave a warm smile that put both Anna and Nils at ease, despite the fact that this very odd man
had seemingly just appeared out of nowhere—well, actually out of the middle of a council climbing frame.

  Everyone stood there in silence for a second or two, before Nils very bravely said: “I… I like your T-shirt. My Uncle Oscar has got one just like it.”

  “In that case,” said the strange man, in a voice of honey chocolate, “I think I would have to say that your Uncle Oscar sounds like a very stylish fellow indeed.”

  Before Nils could say anything else, that same sour noise started again, and the climbing frame started to shimmer.

  CHAPTER 21

  Jack always hated the feeling of breaking the veil. Stepping through was like having a cold shower from the inside out, and when you got to the other side it always felt like you had stood up too quickly and your head was thick and swimmy. Which was exactly how he was feeling now. He felt himself wobble a bit, then his head cleared and his eyes adjusted to where he now found himself. Which was looking at William talking to two children from this side of the veil and a goblin. A goblin in a very odd hat.

  “How many of you are there?” he heard the boy ask, and William looked over his shoulder and winked at Jack.

  “I can safely say there is only room for one of me in any world, and possibly only one of him too.”

  “So no more of you are going to pop out then?” asked the boy.

  “Well, it would be a surprise.”

  As Jack walked forwards, he felt himself wobble again. It was always unsettling to break the veil, but it was different this time. He felt woozy, but as well as that it almost felt like coming home. Which was very strange. The whisperings at the back of his eyes, the odd names and feelings—Mandy, Oakheart, Summersky, late for tea—they were all louder and stronger again, despite how hard he tried to push them down. There was something else too, something new. Like something, somebody even, was stirring inside him, stretching awake. A name came swirling towards him, blown like a memory from a long-ago dream: Bengt.

 

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