“You ready?” he asks.
My heart pounds in my ears. The wind slaps against my face and the ground is blurry. I’m incapable of speech right now so I can only give him a slight nod in reply as I grab onto my harness.
He clutches the bars on each side of the opening and begins the countdown. “One...”
Arch like a banana.
“Two...”
Think like a banana.
“Three!”
Be the bananaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhholymotherofshit!
My brain processes everything in quick succession as we’re catapulted into the air.
The pressure of the wind against my body causes the fabric on my jumpsuit to flap wildly.
The sound is deafening as it whizzes past my ears. My life flashes before my eyes while adrenaline simultaneously charges my blood, reminding me that I am very much in the present.
An eerie calmness suddenly washes over me as I feel Mateo’s presence at my back. He taps my shoulder, signaling me to spread my arms.
Our palms ride the current as we free-fall through the air. I get the urge to be silly and motion like I’m swimming. The wind causes my nostrils to flare as my cheeks wobble around my enormous smile. I’m sure I look ridiculous but I can’t find the will to care. I scream in exhilaration as we descend, my teeth chilled from the air. Before I know it, another tap to my shoulder comes and Matty’s pulling my forehead back to his shoulder as we’re violently yanked upward when he deploys the parachute. It steals my breath for a moment and by the time I recover, I’m enveloped in complete silence. In stillness. The rapid dichotomy threatens to overwhelm me but then Mateo’s laughter rings through the air.
“You did it, Al!”
“Holy shit, we just jumped out of a freakin’ plane, Matty!”
“I’m so proud of you.” He squeezes my shoulder and then holds a toggle in front of me. “Here, grab on and help me steer this thing.”
I loop my fingers through the straps. “What do I do?”
“If you want to go left, pull the left toggle down about four inches and then release the pressure. If you want to go right, do the same with the right toggle. Just hold the straps while I loosen the harness around your legs a bit.”
I play around with the toggles as we sway from left to right, floating through the sky. God, Long Island is breathtaking from this vantage point. Miles upon miles of lush green trees and earth. Off to the side, the sun is reflecting off the ocean, making it seem impossibly blue. Hell, even the expressway looks pretty from up here.
As I take in the landscape, it sinks in that I actually jumped out of a perfectly good airplane. I gave my anxiety the big middle finger and took a risk. I, Allison Gottlieb, overthinker extraordinaire, abhor risk. I thrive on predictability and security. Yet, despite this, I risked my fucking life jumping out of a steel tube, with nothing more than faith that our parachute would deploy. And trust, I realize. Trust in Matty.
My Matty.
All I can think about as we glide toward the landing zone is how far I’ve come over the last six months. Sure, I still work an obscene number of hours each week, but what attorney doesn’t? The important part is that I’ve come to recognize that not everything is about work. It’s okay to make the people in my life a priority. It’s okay to make myself a priority. Granted, now I have to figure out how to actually implement that, but I want to, and that’s a far cry from the woman I was at the start of the year. I’d be lying if I said Matty didn’t have a big hand in this epiphany of mine. I’m riding a high unlike anything I’ve ever known and I owe it all to him.
He and I have been taking it slow over the last few weeks. After knowing each other for so long, taking our relationship to a physical level is huge and being the ever-cautious person that I am, I wanted to make sure we were ready before hopping into bed together. Mateo, understanding as always, has respected my desire to take things slow.
Not that I haven’t wanted to have sex, mind you, because, my Lord, even the mild second-base action we’ve had gets me so ramped up that a light breeze could trigger an orgasm. But I wanted to be smart about this because once we go there, there’s no turning back.
I’m having a really hard time justifying my hesitation now. Because in this moment, all I want is to feel that connection with him. To prove to him that I’m not afraid to take a chance on him. That I’m not afraid to take a chance on us.
“Legs up, Al.”
His words shake me out of my introspection just in time for our landing. After gliding in smoothly on our rears, I can barely tolerate the mere seconds it takes for him to unhook his harness from mine. The moment I’m free, I swing around and launch myself on top of him.
“Whoa, there,” he laughs as his back falls to the ground.
I hover above him, gazing into his dark chocolatey eyes, willing him to see how badly I want him. How much I need him. Matty’s pupils dilate as awareness sets in. I don’t know who makes the first move, but all of a sudden, we’re a flurry of lips, and tongues, and breathy moans. I feel him hardening beneath me and he groans when I sink into his lap, rubbing myself against his length.
I’m not sure how long we make out on that field with the parachute billowing around us, but at some point, Mateo pulls back and frames my face with his hands.
“Al, if we don’t stop right now, I’m going to have a really hard time being a gentleman. Trust me, I’m loving every minute of this, but a man can only take so much.”
“Maybe I don’t want you to be a gentleman.”
His eyes widen. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
I lean down and tug on his bottom lip with my teeth. “Matty, I want you. I don’t want to wait anymore.”
I feel his abs flex beneath me. “Are you sure?”
I smile. “I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”
18
Mateo
June
“Here you go. You’re in room 302. If you take the elevator up to the third floor, your room will be just off to the right.”
I grab the key card from the hotel clerk. “Thank you.”
Allison tugs on my arm. “Matty, you coming?”
“Hopefully I will be very soon. But not too soon, because I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself.” I wink.
She rolls her eyes on a laugh. “C’mon, let’s go check out the view from our room.”
As Al hurries to the elevator, I lag behind, mesmerized by the sway of her hips and the two firm globes in between.
God bless the man who invented squats.
I’ll confess, when Allison admitted she wanted me, my first instinct was to duck behind the hangar and take her up against the wall. But then my conscience stepped in, reminding me that this is Al—the girl I’ve wanted for half my life. Just a few short weeks ago, kissing her seemed like a pipe dream. Now, not only have I kissed her so many times that I’ve memorized the contours of her lips, but she’s about to give me every part of her. While quick and dirty certainly has its merits, I want my first time with Allison to be more than that. I want to worship her body, show her how much she means to me.
When she suggested we get a hotel, a quick Google search found one only minutes from the airfield, and they miraculously had a room available. It would take at least two hours to get back to her place by train and I don’t think either one of us was willing to wait that long. My apartment would’ve been slightly less time but there’s always the risk that Seth would be there, and I don’t want anything to screw this up. So here we are, in a quaint hotel right on the bay, ready to take our relationship to the next level.
When we reach our room, I hold the key card in front of the sensor and turn the handle when the light flashes green.
Allison gasps. “Oh wow, I was totally kidding about the view, but look at that!”
She crosses the small space, slides the door open and steps out onto the balcony. Our room faces the harbor where a few yachts are docked, with Shelter Island in the distance. T
he weather is perfect for late spring—the skies are clear, the water is still, and the ungodly humidity hasn’t quite hit yet. It really is a great view, but I’m much more interested in a different kind of view. Namely the incredible woman in front of me.
I push her hair aside and place light kisses over the nape of her neck. I’m rewarded with a moan as Al rests her head against my chest to give me better access. Goosebumps trickle down her arms as I nip and suck my way over to her shoulder, thankful she wore a sleeveless shirt today.
I’m trying to go slow, to ease her into this, but Allison seems to have other plans as she spins toward me and draws me into a kiss that is nothing short of greedy. Instinct takes over as I jerk her back into the room and rotate our bodies so the backs of her knees hit the bed. My lips chase hers as she sinks into the mattress until I’m stretched over her, careful not to crush her with my weight.
“Matty,” she pants. “You’re wearing too many clothes.”
I smile and pull back as she attempts to free the button on my jeans. “Patience, Al.”
She narrows her eyes, which I think is supposed to be threatening, but it’s actually pretty adorable. “What do you mean, ‘patience’?”
“I mean,” I lean down and place a soft kiss on her lips, “that I’m going to savor this.”
Kiss.
“You.”
Kiss.
“I finally have you laid out beneath me and I don’t intend to stop until my lips have covered every inch of your beautiful skin.”
Allison squirms as I make good on my promise and move south. Over her collarbone, down to her luscious curves. My hands knead her full breasts as my mouth continues its descent. I pay special attention to her sexy little navel as I lift her shirt up a few inches, swirling my tongue until she’s practically squealing.
Allison’s impatience is getting the best of her so she takes it upon herself to remove her top. I groan as the cotton passes over her breasts, revealing a red lacy bra. As conservatively as Al dresses on the surface, you’d never know that she has a penchant for racy lingerie. Which, of course, I don’t mind one bit. She says it makes her feel empowered, which helps when she’s surrounded by corporate douchebags all day. Hey, whatever works, right? You certainly won’t hear me complaining.
I immediately get to work on freeing the clasp, testing the weight of her in my palms as the cups fall away.
“You’re so perfect,” I say, circling her stiff peak with my tongue.
Allison moans. “Matty, your tongue is perfect. Magical, even.”
I laugh as my lips make their way down her torso, stopping just above the waistband of her yoga pants. “Al, you haven’t even begun to see what I can do with my tongue.” I pull the stretchy fabric down just enough to place a kiss on her bare hip. “But you’re about to.”
19
Allison
June
I’m panting in anticipation as Mateo slowly removes my pants and his lips graze my lacy boyshorts. Each caress has me bucking my body to get closer to him. I should be embarrassed by the noises I’m making but it’s been a long time since I’ve had sex and I don’t think I’ve ever been this turned on.
I tremble when he groans, sending soft vibrations through my core. I’ve never been comfortable with oral before. I can never seem to relax enough to enjoy it, so it’s always been something I tried to avoid, rather than reveal my neurosis. But as I feel the soft warmth of Mateo’s lips when he tastes me, as he moans into my hot flesh, any lingering inhibitions melt away.
The awkwardness I usually have with a new partner isn’t there. All I can focus on is how amazing this feels. How I’ve never experienced anything like this. How with him, I’m climbing higher and faster than I’ve ever been. Before I know it, my limbs tense up and I’m screaming his name in release.
As my body falls slack, Matty stands and gives me the sexiest smile I’ve ever seen. I watch with rapt attention as he removes his blue T-shirt with one hand, a feat that only a man could pull off with any measure of smoothness. I bite my lip when he pops the button to his jeans and slides the zipper down. I’ve seen Mateo in his underwear before—hell, half the Instagram world probably has—but as the denim pools on the floor and he hooks his fingers under the waistband of his boxer briefs, I find myself holding my breath, so anxious to see this part of him that all I can do is stare.
Let’s face it; penises are not generally attractive. I mean, when you consider all the dangly parts and how they have the tendency to hook one way or another, they’re not something I’ve ever looked at and thought, “Wow, that’s a good-looking penis. I can’t wait to get my hands on that sucker.” And don’t even get me started on men who lack interest in keeping themselves groomed down there. I mean c’mon, why should women be the only ones who need to worry about landscaping?
But with Mateo, it’s different. As he pulls his Calvin Kleins down, all I can think about is how beautiful he is. His cock is long and thick, proudly pointing to his sculpted abs over a nicely trimmed patch of hair. Every single inch of his bronzed body is flawless. He’s a living, breathing Adonis, and somehow, I get the pleasure of seeing him like this.
He smirks. “Do you mind if I get back to business, or would you like a few minutes to stare?”
I laugh. “Just give me a few more seconds.”
“As long as I get to do the same.” He waggles his eyebrows.
That’s another thing that makes this situation different. I’ve never had a lover who would tease me in the middle of sex. It was always a race to the finish—tab A goes into slot B, some thrusting and grunting would occur, then a very anticlimactic ending and some awkward small talk while getting dressed. Having fun or just sitting here staring at one another was never part of the equation.
I’ve never felt so wanted before.
Or so wanton.
As our gazes travel hungrily over each other’s bodies, something in the air shifts; it’s almost as if I can feel an actual current running between us. Mateo’s irises darken almost completely as he swallows a lump in his throat. Whatever he sees in my expression prompts him to take action. Without another word, he rejoins me on the bed and takes my mouth in a punishing kiss.
I can taste myself on his lips, which drives me into this wild frenzy of lust. Our tongues duel as my hands travel over each defined muscle on his back. I put everything I have into this kiss, trying to communicate how much this means to me. How much he means to me. We’re both breathless, consumed by this electric charge blasting between us.
“God, Al,” Mateo pants, as my hand snakes around to stroke his length.
“I know,” I moan.
“Hold on, I need to get a condom.”
I pull on his thick hair and wrap my legs around his waist, preventing him from leaving the bed. “Matty, I don’t want anything between us. I’ve never had sex without a condom before, but I’m on the pill and I’m safe. If you tell me you’re safe then I trust you.”
The gold flecks in his eyes twinkle as he stares at me for a beat. “Are you sure? I’m safe, but I don’t want you to do something strictly for my benefit.”
I smile softly as I rest my fingertips against his cheek. “You’re my best friend. And you’re about to be my lover. After today, I hope it’s pretty obvious that I trust you with my life. I know you would never hurt me or put me at risk. I also know that there’s nothing more that I want in this world than to feel you inside of me with nothing between us.”
He flashes me a blinding smile. “There’s nothing more that I want either.”
I reach down to take his length into my hand and guide him to my entrance. “Then what are you waiting for?”
We both groan as he enters my body. When he settles in as deep as he can be, Mateo grabs my hand and flattens my palm over his left pec.
“Do you feel how fast my heart is beating, Al?” he asks breathlessly. “Only you do that to me. You’ve always done this to me. I can’t put into words how honored I am that you trust me w
ith your body. With your pleasure. I swear to you I will never take that for granted.”
“I—I—” Words escape me as I’m overcome with emotion. I can’t articulate what I’m feeling, so instead I say, “Mateo, kiss me. Please, just kiss me.”
Our lips never part as he moves in and out of my body, burying himself deeper and harder with each thrust. He plays my body like a maestro, bringing me to new heights I would’ve never dreamed possible. When I finally come, he follows almost immediately after. And when we eventually still, I wonder to myself how I could’ve ever been whole without this.
Without him.
We lie in bed afterwards, our labored breaths the only sound in the room. We’ve burrowed under the covers, limbs intertwined, my head resting on his chest.
I’m drowsy and content but right before I drift off, I manage to say, “Matty?”
He strokes my hair. “Hmm?”
“Thank you for today. Everything has been so perfect.”
He tightens his hold on me and kisses the top of my head. “I couldn’t have said it better myself.”
20
Mateo
July
“I can’t believe you’re making me go out there like this.”
I raise a brow at Allison as I help her pull her arm through the side of the unwieldy foam and fabric monstrosity. “Consider it payback for making me leave my balls at your apartment door and wear a dinosaur onesie.”
She glares at me, but it loses any potential power when the yellow lightning bolt attached to the heart costume flips up to smack her in the face. She bats it aside with her free hand. “You loved that onesie.”
I can’t bring myself to tell her that the only situation in which a guy would ever “love” a furry dinosaur get-up would be if it involved a sexual kink of some kind. Not that I could ever see that being my thing, but I try not to judge. Instead, I yank the mascot costume down into place and drop a kiss on her scowling lips. “No comment.”
Happy New You Page 14