I can’t help but obey him. The man exudes power. It wafts off him. I pad over to stand in front of him, forcing myself to keep my back straight and my chin up. Shoulders back. Hands loose at my sides. I don’t want to appear weak to him.
“I do not want you to doubt for one moment that you are anything less than an amazing Dom over Josie.”
I nod. His words are unexpected, though really, I had no idea what he was going to say.
“You did a fantastic job of spanking her even though you’ve never done something like that before. She responded well. If spanking is something you choose to incorporate into your lifestyle, I think you can easily manage.”
I nod, but lick my lips. I can’t bring myself to tell him that spanking her wasn’t my thing. I did it because I knew I should try it. I did it because Josie wanted it. But I didn’t like it. I much prefer the sensual side of BDSM.
Quinten lifts his hand off the back of the loveseat and props his chin on his palm. “I want you to let me spank you now, Grayson.”
I flinch, my lips parting. I’d feared he might say something like that. I can’t think how to respond even though I’ve had several minutes to think about it.
He speaks again before I can put words together. “There are two reasons why I want to spank you. One, it’s important for every Dom to experience anything they expect their submissive to endure. If you intend to regularly spank Josie, you need to be on the receiving end at least once in order to play safely.”
I lick my lips again. My mouth is dry. He has a point. I’m not new to BDSM. I’m aware that Doms should always experience what they dole out.
“Second, I want you to push your boundaries this weekend. It’s why you’re here, after all. I want you to explore this side of yourself. Your submissive side.”
I purse my lips and glance down, unwilling to acknowledge still that he could possibly be accurate about his assessment of me. It still makes me uncomfortable to think perhaps I’m submissive on any level.
It’s not that I judge anyone for their choices. If a man wants to submit to another man or a woman, I would never criticize him. But I’ve never considered myself submissive.
I wince internally as I think back on that night a year ago when Master Quinten approached me at Surrender and offered to scene with me. I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t admit I’ve often thought back on that exchange and wondered—albeit with great frustration—if there had been any merit to his assessment.
For the first time in my life, he’d made me think even if it was no more than a fleeting nudge in the back of my mind.
Showering with Quinten and letting him stroke my cock doesn’t make me submissive though. Just because I’m attracted to the man doesn’t mean I’m submissive.
The way he’s watching me makes me squirm. He’s giving me a chance to process his words. Power once again fills the air between us. He makes my knees weak when he looks at me. Not just because I want him to touch me again but because I want him to insist upon it.
I’m incredibly nervous, and I’m sure he knows this. We’re about to cross a line, and it’s up to me to agree to step into this unfamiliar territory.
I draw in a breath and hold it. It’s hard to stand still. I want to turn back the clock to before the man caused me to question everything I’ve ever thought to be true about myself. I also want to experience what he’s offering so badly that my cock is harder than a rock and pressing against my jeans.
I’m unnerved by my arousal. Intrigued at the same time.
I wince as I hear my father’s voice in the back of my head. “Be a man, Grayson. Never let anyone get the best of you.”
Quinten speaks again. “I want you to explore this other side of you when Josie isn’t watching. That’s why I’ve put her down for a nap and locked the door to my office.”
Thank God for that, at least. I’m not sure I could relax if Josie were watching me submit to someone else. “What’s this going to prove?” I ask. “I mean, so what if I submit to you? That doesn’t mean I could submit to someone else, and it doesn’t solve any of my concerns with Josie. In fact, it seems as though all we’re accomplishing so far this weekend is proof that Josie and I aren’t compatible.” I wince. This is my biggest worry.
I’m so fucking attracted to Josie it’s mind-boggling, but I’m starting to realize I can’t fulfill this need she has at all. I love to watch. It makes me damn horny. But I don’t have it in me to discipline her or care for her the way she craves.
I know she enjoyed the spanking I gave her. She has no idea I did not. Now, she’s going to expect that from me. She’ll think we’ve added a new dynamic. I’m scared out of my mind. I’m going to lose her. Not only am I going to lose her, but I’m going to lose myself. Does Quinten not realize how fucked up I am? Of course not. He can’t possibly know how much I want to let him dominate me nor how much more it’s going to hurt when we leave here.
I take a deep breath. I’m going to do this anyway. I can’t let the opportunity slip by me. I want to experience what Quinten is offering.
“Don’t look at it like that. You’re doing amazing with Josie. Several things have come to light. For one, you like watching her.”
I nod. He’s right about that. Jesus. Who knew I would enjoy watching her submit to someone else? What does that say about me?
“She’s a natural, Grayson. Little, I mean. She’s eased into being a little as if she has always played in this world. She’s not going to leave this weekend without needing that side of her to be fulfilled in some way.”
I’ve figured that out. He’s right. And it freaks me out. “What if I can’t give her that?”
“Let’s worry about that later. Right now, I want to focus on you.”
Focusing on me has the potential of making things worse. I might end up addicted to this man. I’m pretty sure Josie already is. He’s made it clear that he’s not available or interested in taking on two submissives. And what the hell am I thinking? I’m still not convinced I am submissive, or even willing to go down that path.
Quinten holds my gaze. “I want you to submit to me. What harm can it do? One of two things will happen. Either you’ll find yourself uncomfortable and unable, or you’ll learn you enjoy being dominated. Either way, you’ll know.”
He’s right. And of all the people on earth, he’s the only man I would even consider turning my power over to.
“The clock is ticking, Grayson. We have less than two hours to explore. Yes or no.”
I swallow. “Yes,” I murmur before I can talk myself out of it.
He holds my gaze. “You’ll call me Sir or Master Quinten.”
I’m going to unravel from the nerves. My face heats. He’s asking too much. It’s one thing to do a scene, but calling him Sir is huge. In my mind it’s bigger than telling someone you love them for the first time. My hands are shaking, and I fist them at my sides.
“Grayson…” he warns.
I draw in a deep breath and find the will. “Yes, Sir.” My voice is weak.
“Good. Now I want you to remove your clothes. Everything.”
I flinch. I’m not surprised, but I’m scared out of my mind. Mostly because I’m hard, and he’s going to see that immediately. Not that he hasn’t already noticed. I can’t exactly hide my erection. I saw him looking at it in the kitchen.
I pull my shirt over my head and drop it on the armchair while I kick off my shoes. My fingers are shaking as I unbutton and unzip my jeans, and I’m a quivering mess as I lower both my jeans and underwear down my legs. I bend down to pull them off and remove my socks.
Fully naked and erect, I stand in front of him once again.
Seconds tick by, making my heart race while Master Quinten takes in my frame from top to bottom. My cock bobs without my permission.
Master Quinten sits straighter and drops his arm from the back of the loveseat. “Come here, Grayson. I want you to lie across my lap in the same way Josie did last night. You can lay your head on the
cushion.” He pats the seat next to him.
I shuffle forward, breathing shallowly. I bend over when I reach his side and drape my body over his lap.
His hands are on me in an instant, one on my thighs, one on my lower back. He strokes my body.
I fold my arms above my head and cradle my face. My cock is nestled against his thigh, the pressure almost unbearable, and this is before he’s swatted me.
I draw in deep breaths and let them out slowly while he explores my body. Eventually, he plants one hand on my lower back so that only the other hand is moving up and down my thighs, between them, over my butt. He doesn’t touch my balls or my cock which is mostly disappointing but not unexpected.
“Men often experience a spanking in the same way women do. Higher for punishment. Lower will vibrate through your balls and make your cock hard.”
I shift my weight on his lap. Make my cock hard? Is he kidding? It couldn’t be harder.
He chuckles. “I guess that seems impossible right now. Your dick is fully erect.” His voice lilts a bit. I’m affecting him. He likes that my cock is hard for him. Or maybe I’m making this shit up, wishful thinking. He shoves my legs apart and reaches between them to stroke his fingers over my balls and then my cock, gently. Far too fucking gently.
I whimper. I can’t stop myself. I grit my teeth to keep from moaning, and then a long breath rushes out of me when he removes his hand and settles it on my butt.
He squeezes my cheeks. “Ready?”
“Yes, Sir,” I whisper, wishing he would just do it and stop torturing me.
His first swat is high on my left cheek. It makes me stiffen but doesn’t hurt. Without a word, he spanks the other cheek next and then rubs them both. “Relax your muscles, babe,” he croons.
I swallow when he calls me babe. He did that last night, too. I’m not sure how I feel about it.
While my mind is processing his endearment, he spanks me again, harder this time. And again. The sting is surprisingly welcome. It grounds me somehow. I find myself craving the next swat. And he doesn’t disappoint me. He spanks my entire ass, his hand moving around to cover every inch of skin, the pressure increasing every few seconds.
My butt is heated and I’m gasping for air when he shifts his attention lower, striking the junction of my thighs with my cheeks.
My entire body jerks at the first contact in that spot. Holy mother of God. He wasn’t kidding. My balls draw up and my dick stiffens almost painfully.
He does it again, and I cry out, lifting my head.
Two more quick spanks to that same area, and then he stops and rubs my heated skin. “Shhh. Relax. Your entire body is stiff.”
I’m shaking as I drop my head. Part of me wants to tell him to fuck off. Part of me wants to beg him to fuck me. Take me any way he pleases. I have no experience with penetration, but I’m so damn aroused that I want anything he will give me.
Master Quinten continues to rub my ass instead, showing no sign that he intends to touch my dick again.
When I part my legs in silent invitation, he rubs my inner thighs, not reaching high enough. “It’s maddening isn’t it?”
I shiver. “Please,” I beg.
“Now you know how Josie feels when one of us spanks her. Imagine if I left you like this.”
I grit my teeth. If he intends to leave my dick like this, it will turn blue and fall off.
“Part of your lesson here was not just so you’d know what it feels like to be spanked, but also to give you a taste of the arousal that comes with it.” He keeps rubbing my cheeks, the burn still keeping me on edge. “Remember this in the future. If you want to punish Josie, keep it high and fast so that she feels the sting and learns a lesson. If you lower your hand to send vibrations to her pussy, you need to either follow that up with an orgasm or intentionally leave her needy.”
I grit my teeth and give a slight nod against my folded arms. I’ve never teased Josie and left her hanging indefinitely. And there’s no way I’m going to spank her like this. I understand why she liked it. I fucking liked getting spanked too, though I’m loath to admit it. But I didn’t enjoy doling it out. I much preferred watching Quinten spank her.
Guilt crawls up my spine. If Josie needs this, I should be able to give it to her. I’m disappointed in myself and doubting everything I’ve thought was true about me.
Master Quinten pats my butt. “Rise onto your knees in front of me, babe.”
I’m shaking as I slide off his lap and kneel before him.
“Stroke your cock. Gently.”
I grip my dick, shuddering at the contact.
“Gently, I said.” He’s leaning forward, elbows on his knees, watching me.
Precome leaks from the tip. I’m so close to coming I’m not sure I can stop myself. I slide my hand up and down the shaft, not applying enough pressure, trying hard to obey Master Quinten’s request.
Master Quinten reaches out and strokes a finger through the slit at the tip of my dick. He hesitates slightly, and then it’s like he’s come to some decision. He brings his finger to his mouth to taste my come.
I sway to one side at the eroticism. How could anything be this sexy?
“Mmm. I don’t want you to come yet. Let go of your cock, babe.”
I freeze for a moment, unable or unwilling to release my erection. I have to pry my fingers off, and then I fist my hands at my sides and grit my teeth. My cock bobs painfully in front of me.
“That’s it.” He reaches out and sets one finger on my dick, stroking it up and down until I moan. “Your skin is so smooth and soft. Silky.”
I don’t want to talk about my skin. I want to fucking come.
“Maddening, isn’t it?”
I glance away, not willing to answer him.
“It’s weird the first time you submit to another person. Let them control your orgasm.”
Like he’s ever been in this position. I roll my eyes before I can stop myself.
He chuckles, making me gasp and look at him. “I’ve submitted to both men and women at various times in my life, Grayson. I wouldn’t be as strong of a Dom if I’d never experienced the other side.”
I swallow. I can’t picture Master Quinten submitting to anyone. What he’s said makes sense, but I’m still stunned. I swallow hard, trying to ignore my cock.
“Stand, babe. Step between my legs. I’m going to take care of that erection for you.”
I flinch. He’s going to give me a blow job? Now? I scramble to my feet and step between his legs. No way would I say no to this demand.
Master Quinten sets his hands on my waist and pulls me closer. His mouth is level with my dick and I grab his shoulders as he licks the tip.
Josie gives amazing head, but this is totally different because I’m not the one in charge. Master Quinten is. I can’t tell him how I want him to suck me. I don’t hold the power right now. I don’t get to choose the speed and pressure. Master Quinten does. And the unknown is making my vision blur.
Master Quinten takes his time, licking up and down my shaft before drawing me into his mouth. He does something with his tongue along my erection that makes me rise onto my toes. He grips my hips firmly, his fingers forcing my butt cheeks to part.
I shudder as my tight hole is exposed to the air.
Master Quinten makes no move to touch me there. Instead, he finally increases the suction and masterfully sucks my cock with just the right pressure.
I moan loudly into the room and tip my head back. I’m not sure I’ve ever been this aroused. This close to the edge. This needy. The fact that I have no say in this makes it hotter.
It seems like Master Quinten knows exactly when I’m close to orgasm and lets up on the suction, drawing out the inevitable. It’s both maddening and fucking delicious. My balls are tight and drawn up. They have been for a while.
Suddenly, he sucks me deeper, hollowing out his cheeks as I hit the back of his throat. I come hard, shooting into his mouth while he swallows every jet of my come. It s
eems to last forever. My legs are shaking, nearly unable to support my weight by the time I’m finally spent.
Master Quinten slowly eases off my cock, releasing it with a final pop. He nudges me back a few inches and then turns me to help me sit on the loveseat next to him. After tugging a soft blanket off the back of the sofa, he covers me, tucking the material around my shoulders and along my thighs.
I’m shaking, unable to speak.
He leans down and kisses my forehead. “Rest for a minute, babe.” After stroking my cheek, he turns and strides across the room.
I watch him, wondering what he’s doing, and then I realize he’s checking on Josie when he leans over the desk and looks at the monitor.
When he returns, I turn my gaze to his and lick my dry lips. “Is she okay?”
He smiles. “She’s fine. I put the fear of God in her about leaving that bed.”
I chuckle. “She really has taken to this lifestyle quickly. I should have known. The night I picked her up from Kellen’s, she was so comfortable in her skin that I should have heard the sirens going off.”
“Well, you’re here aren’t you? So I guess you did pay attention.” He pats my thigh and rises again. “Hang tight. I’m going to get you a bottle of water.”
Bless him. I don’t move an inch while he’s gone, resting my eyes. I’m almost asleep when he sits next to me again and lifts the open water bottle to my lips. He cups the back of my head too, making it possible for me to drink without lifting my arms.
“That’s it. You need the fluids.”
After half the bottle is gone, I sigh. My gaze is on my lap. “So, that happened,” I say, trying to make light of what we’ve done.
“It did. How do you feel?”
“Sated.” I jerk my gaze to his lap. “What about you? Jesus. I should—”
He cuts me off. “Don’t go there. It’s not a give-and-take. When I dominate you, I decide.” He shifts his weight a bit though, and I can see his cock is hard. Surely he’s as needy as I was.
I nod and meet his gaze. “I’m…uncertain.”
“Understandable. You need to process what you’ve experienced. You could do with a nap yourself.” He smiles. “How about if I tuck you in and then get Josie up?”
Pleasing Josie (Surrender Book 5) Page 13