by Jaci Burton
But where was home? She didn't have one anymore.
How could she have been so blind? How could she have allowed Ryan to creep into her heart, only to find he was playing her? She shouldn't be surprised by that.
Her mother's voice rang in her ears, those punishing lectures she'd heard over and over and over again. Men would hurt her. She was plain and homely and no man would ever love her.
For so long she hadn't wanted to believe it. But her mother had been right.
How Ryan and Erica must have been laughing over her these past months. She was so naive. When would she learn?
And since she'd left, not a word from him. It had been days, and not a single word. Did she really expect he would try and find her? He was probably glad she was gone.
Of course, she hadn't gone to the office. She'd have to find another job now. There was no way she could continue to work for him, not after everything that had happened.
And then there was the baby.
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The only bright spot in this whole dismal affair.
The twin towers of The Chalet Hotel shone like a beacon from her hotel window. She wondered how Ryan would feel if he knew she had taken up residence in one of the competing chains.
She hadn't even asked for a suite, even though she had a considerable expense account as Ryan's wife. She wasn't going to touch his money.
As soon as she got back on her feet, found a new job and a new place to live, she'd never use another dime of McKay money.
They'd divorce, and she'd get nothing. After all, she'd left before the terms of the contract were met. That meant she'd go away empty-handed.
Of course, she could tell him about the baby. Then he'd keep the company and she'd be entitled to a settlement. But she'd have to live with him, sleep with him, for the remainder of the year. No way would she do that. Her heart couldn't take it.
Besides, that would mean he'd won. And so would Erica. And they would spend the rest of their lives laughing at her stupidity.
She'd be damned if he was going to win this one. Let him lose McKay Corporation. That was his one great love anyway. Let him feel a bit of the pain she was going through right now, knowing how it felt to lose something he loved.
Despite losing control of the company, he'd still be wealthy. He could start something new. She pushed aside the nagging guilt that nestled in her stomach. She wouldn't feel guilty. This wasn't her fault.
And in the meantime, she'd look for another job. With a company that wouldn't mind her taking a bit of time off for maternity leave. And she and her child would be fine.
Her heart would heal. Eventually.
A knock at the door interrupted her self-pity session. She opened it, her jaw dropping as Leland Banks stood there. How in the world had he found her?
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Margaret, of course. She was the only one who knew where Faith had gone.
"Margaret told you I was here."
He nodded as she opened the door and led him into the tiny living area. "Yes."
She motioned him to the small sofa. "What can I do for you, Leland?"
"Come back, ma'am."
She shook her head. "I can't. My marriage to Ryan is over."
"I think I know why you would think it was over, but I must tell you you're wrong."
"No, you don't know why, although I appreciate you coming. You can just go back to Ryan and tell him I'm not coming back, and I'm sorry he's going to lose the company."
"He doesn't care about the company, Mrs. McKay. He's already called a board meeting for noon today to announce the end of your marriage."
She frowned. "You'd think he'd wait until the board called a meeting to check on the status of our marriage. Why the hurry?"
"He's very unhappy, ma'am."
Right. He was probably unhappy about losing the company, not about losing Faith.
"His happiness is no longer my problem, Leland." She turned her head to the window, swiping away the hair falling in front of her face.
"He loves you."
She whipped around, desperately needing to refute Leland's statement. "That's a lie!"
Leland remained stoic, unmoved by her passionate denial. "He loves you."
Tears threatened, but Faith refused to be swayed. "He's a good actor, Leland. He even fooled me."
"You don't understand, ma'am. I know why you left. If you'll just let me explain--"
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"Explain what? Explain how upset poor Ryan is at the thought of losing his company?" She crossed her arms, hoping to hold in the wretched grief threatening to pour out. "How much is he paying you to come here and beg on his behalf?"
Leland sniffed and stood. "That's insulting."
She shrugged and waved her hand. "Just tell him it didn't work, Leland. I'm not interested in hearing any more." How much more could she stand? She felt stupid enough as it was. Couldn't this just end?
"I beg your pardon, ma'am, but you're just going to have to listen to me!"
She turned, never having heard Leland raise his voice before. He stood rigid in the middle of the room, but his brow was furrowed and anger crossed his normally implacable features.
"I overheard James this morning," he said.
"So?"
"He was speaking with Miss Stanton on the telephone. Normally I don't eavesdrop, would be improper, but I paused when I heard their discussion."
Despite wanting to close her ears and her heart to his explanation, something about his statement tipped along the edges of her memory.
"Go on."
"He was laughing. About you. He was talking to Miss Stanton about how they'd fooled you when they led you to believe that James was Master Ryan. James said their plan worked perfectly, that you moved out that evening."
No. That's not how it happened. She wouldn't believe it. It was Ryan that night. She'd heard him, saw him with her own eyes.
Or had she?
"I went to the office last week to surprise Ryan," she explained. "I found him with Erica, their arms around each other. Laughing at how gullible I was."
Leland's brown eyes softened. "Did you see Master Ryan's face?"
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She thought. Ryan's back had been turned to her the entire time.
"No, just his back."
"And did he speak?"
"Yes, but come to think of it, I only heard him mumble because he whispered in Erica's ear."
Suddenly the room spun wildly. Faith grasped the sofa for support and reached for Leland's hand "Oh, no. Oh, Leland. Did they trick me?"
His expression softened as he coaxed her into a seat. "It appears so."
Shock, hurt, guilt and anger all swirled inside her. How could she have done this to Ryan? How could she have done this to them?
How could James and Erica have done this? Damn them!
She buried her face in her hands, unable to believe what she'd allowed to occur. Her lack of belief in herself had screwed everything up.
She couldn't keep the tears at bay and finally broke down. Leland gathered her in his arms and held her against him as she poured out her grief.
When she had no tears left to expend, he handed her a handkerchief.
She laughed.
"It seems you're always here when I fall apart."
He nodded, his voice soft and paternal. "I don't mind, really. Margaret and I always wanted children, and Master Ryan was the closest we ever had. But he never allowed anyone to love him."
She looked at him, the realization hitting her before the words were out of his mouth.
"Until you," he said with a smile.
Oh, no. What had she done? "Leland, I've made a terrible mistake.
I've hurt Ryan deeply."
"No, ma'am, th
e mistake was made by James and Miss Stanton. They manipulated you and Mr. McKay. And now you and he are at odds, and he's prepared to give up McKay Corporation."
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Anger and desperation filled her. She'd caused irreparable damage, and all because she believed that Ryan couldn't really love her. Damn James--he'd known it, too.
"Leland, how bad is Ryan?"
He shook his head. "Mr. McKay--Ryan--is not good. He mopes about, has barely gone to the office, won't speak to anyone. It's quite obvious he hasn't slept or eaten much since you left. He's trying to be indifferent about it, but he's hurting."
The pain was nearly unbearable. She wanted to run home to Ryan, throw her arms around him and beg his forgiveness. Then she wanted to tell him how much she loved him, how much she'd always loved him.
And let him know about the baby.
The baby!
She looked at her watch. "What time is the board meeting?"
"Noon. Why?"
"I have to hurry."
"What are you doing, ma'am?"
She should have believed in Ryan, instead of letting her mother's words seep back into her consciousness. She'd let her own insecurities rule her judgment. Now she'd lost her chance at love.
But she could still make amends to Ryan, at least professionally.
Faith grabbed Leland's hands. "I've got to save the company for Ryan!
Help me, Leland, we have to make it on time!"
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Chapter Thirteen
Ryan stood in front of the Board of Directors, a sense of dismal finality darkening his mood even more than it had been lately. This would be the last time he'd stand before them as CEO. Less than a week ago everything looked as if it would work out. Hell, less than a week ago he hadn't cared a whit about goings-on at the company. All he'd cared about was Faith and his realization that he loved her.
Now everything he'd cared about was gone.
There was no point in delaying the inevitable. Faith had left him before the year was up, before she'd gotten pregnant, before they'd made a life together. A real life. The terms of the will hadn't been fulfilled.
James had won.
And James knew it too, judging from the self-satisfied smirk on his face. It killed Ryan to turn this company over to James, knowing his cousin had no intention of keeping it intact. He'd probably have it on the market within a week, selling it off in chunks to the highest bidder.
It hurt more than Ryan dared to admit. Not the loss of his job, he didn't really care about that. But the loss of the McKay holdings, the company his grandfather and great grandfather had built from nothing.
Ryan had made plans for bigger and better things in the future.
Now all was lost.
A few months ago, the thought of losing control of the company would have devastated him. Now, all he could think about was Faith.
"Will we be starting soon?" Lincoln Simmons, one of the directors, looked at his watch. "It is after twelve, you know, and I have another meeting to attend."
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Ryan took a deep breath. He'd stood in front of this board thousands of times and had never once been nervous. Today, his pulse raced, his gut felt like he'd swallowed a basketball and his head throbbed. Might as well get it over with.
What was he waiting for? A miracle? An angel to swoop down and make everything right?
It wasn't going to happen. Ryan didn't believe in miracles.
"Yes, let's begin." He cleared his throat, took a sip of water, and began. "As you all know, Quentin McKay outlined specific terms in his will relating to my ability to hold my position as CEO and majority owner of McKay Corporation."
"Yes, yes, we know all this stuff. Just get on with it."
All eyes turned to James. He wasn't liked by any of the board members. At least Ryan could take some satisfaction in that. They stared at his improper outburst.
James looked around the board room and slinked further into his chair.
"Continue, Ryan," Stan said, his eyes full of compassion.
"I married Faith Lewis over three months ago, with the intent of fulfilling my obligations related to my grandfather's will. The stipulations indicated that Faith and I must remain married, and within one year produce a pregnancy."
"You're stating the obvious," James interrupted. "We all know what the will required. Get on with it."
Ryan seethed with an anger he couldn't turn on his cousin. Oh, but he'd really like to. Instead, for the few minutes he retained control of the company, he'd make him suffer.
"If you don't mind, James, I am CEO of this company and majority stockholder. Either hold your comments until I'm through or I'll have you removed from the room."
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stupid as he thought. He clamped his mouth shut and shot an evil glare at Ryan.
Not that it mattered. In mere minutes Ryan would be the one out the door, and James, God help them all, would take over.
Ryan swallowed. "I have an announcement to make. It's necessary for you all to be made aware that--"
"That the terms of the will are even closer to fulfillment," Faith said, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. All heads turned in her direction.
Faith's dramatic entrance through the double doors at the back of the boardroom shocked everyone into silence, especially Ryan, who stared dumfounded at her. She stopped as soon as she entered, drawing deep breaths as if she'd run all the way up the stairs to the twenty-first flour of McKay Towers.
Ryan's heart pounded like crazy. He didn't know whether to be happy or supremely angry to see her.
What the hell was she doing here? And why now? Had she come to gloat over his failure?
She cautiously approached the front of the room and stood next to Ryan, smiling at him as if they hadn't argued, hadn't dissolved their relationship. What was going on?
The next shock to his system came when she slipped her hand inside his and squeezed.
"Please, trust me," she whispered into his ear. "I'm sorry, I'll explain in a minute."
Ryan leaned back and searched her face, looking for some explanation. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes glazed with excitement and something else. Hope?
She'd asked him to trust her. How could he? He'd placed his heart in her hands, and look what she'd done.
Their eyes remain locked for a few more seconds. Faith refused to look away, despite Ryan's penetrating stare.
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It didn't matter, anyway. Nothing she said or did would change things. He stepped back from the podium and let Faith have the microphone.
"My apologies for running late," she said. "I had an appointment this morning, and you know how doctors are. They don't always keep a timely schedule."
What was she up to? Her bright blue eyes sparkled with joy, and there was a glow to her face he'd seen many times, usually right after they made love.
"Do you want to tell them, my love, or should I?" she asked.
Tell who what? She'd completely lost him now. "Uhh, go ahead. You tell them."
"I'd be delighted." She turned to address the board with an ear splitting grin. "I'm pleased to announce that Ryan and I are expecting a child."
His heart skipped a beat before pummeling his chest. What the hell was this? Had she gone insane? Ryan pulled her aside as the board members applauded and yelled congratulations. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" he hissed.
She was nonplussed, her face full of innocence. "I'm addressing the board like you asked me to."
"You can't lie to them, Faith. They
'll know. I was planning to tell them about our breakup. Why are you here?"
"Please, Ryan, if you ever had any trust in me before, then give me a chance. I'll explain everything as soon as we're finished here."
"Why should I trust--"
"That's a lie!" James slapped the conference table, the sound echoing in the large room.
Once again, James quieted the room with his outburst. He stood, hands clenched into fists at his side, his face reddening.
With surprising calm, Faith placed her hand on her hip and raised her eyebrows. "Really, James. And what makes you think it's a lie?"
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"Because I know you two aren't together anymore!"
"It appears to me we're together, wouldn't you agree, Ryan?"
She looked up at him with such love it stunned him. Love he knew she didn't feel for him. It was all a lie. Wasn't it?
But she'd asked him to trust her. Could he? He'd never been able to trust anyone before her. And she'd left him. Just like everyone he'd loved.
Could he take the chance?
"Oh, the hell with it," he mumbled and slid his arm around Faith's shoulder. He'd regret this later, but for now he'd play the game. "Yes, we're obviously together. I'm glad I didn't have to make the announcement without Faith present."
"And if there are any concerns about the validity of my pregnancy, I'll be happy to provide the name and telephone number of my obstetrician for verification."
"But, but..." James sputtered.
"James," Faith said casually. "You don't really want me to bring up your impersonation of Ryan to the board, do you?"
"What? What impersonation?" Ryan asked, trying to think beyond the excited whispers of the board members.
"Your cousin decided to play a little trick on me," she said, shooting a glare at James. "I found him being, shall we say, promiscuous with Erica Stanton. In your office."
The room hushed, all eyes focused on Faith's revelation.
"With Erica? When?" Ryan shot a quick look toward James. His face was reddening and he was licking his lips like a cornered animal.
Something began to boil within Ryan. The pieces of the puzzle were starting to fall into place.
"A few days ago. I came to the office to surprise you one evening, and I thought it was you. James was in your office, with her," Faith said, accenting the her with a decidedly feminine dislike.
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Ryan couldn't believe it. Though he could believe almost anything of James. But Faith. What had she thought when she'd seen James impersonating him? Of course. That's why she'd left him!