The Weight of the World

by G M Archer

  Donovan’s mouth sit slightly agape, his hands out dumbly at his side.

  “No”, I whispered, my hands out at my side, “No, Varrick, don’t make me do this.” It was not begging, I had lost too much of my grace at this point, and I would not lose my last sway to desperation.

  “Choose”, he commanded coolly, “And if you can’t, I will have them all put to death.”

  “Varrick!” Joseph screeched.

  “Silence! She wanted to toy with fate and so I’ll let her taste the poison of consequence, stay out of it.”

  And he looked at me, actually looked me in my tear-filled eyes for the first time since Mary’s funeral, and I could swear his eyes softened, some pain inflicting deep in his person. He quickly overcame it.

  “Don’t kill them, Atlas, choose me. You can’t weigh that many lives against one.” Donovan’s pleadings were a distant thing in my terrifyingly numb existence.

  He leaned forward and squeezed my hand as Varrick’s gaze grew colder, “Atlas?”

  “5.” Varrick began.

  “No,” my voice was a rasp.

  “4. 3. 2-

  “The protestors!” I wailed “I choose the protestors!”

  Donovan’s shoulders sagged in a sigh of relief. I began to feel ill.

  “Varrick”, my lip twitched. I was stuck in a waking nightmare. This couldn’t be happening. He wasn’t going to kill them. He couldn’t.

  “You heard her”, Varrick turned away from me, “Take care of the rabble, and take these three away.”

  The guards moved like machines, seizing Joseph as he jerked towards me. Donovan’s lips moved in slow motion, beginning to form words as I helplessly watched a group of guards leave the room shouldering muskets to carry out what I had been forced to command. And as one’s hand reached out for me I lunged forward and grabbed the visible tunic on the side of Varrick’s breastplate.

  “They’re right”, I said, having to angle my head up to his superior height, his dark eyes full of surprise as he gazed down on me “You’re a monster” I spat.

  He was taken aback, frozen on the edge of madness. He locked eyes with me and his lips formed a pitied whisper that barely existed, “Welcome to my hell.”

  His hand came softly to the edge of my head, his fingers catching on the blue rose in my hair and it came free into his hand as the guards grabbed me, dragging me away struggling. Varrick watched me in a nearly guilty way till I was out of sight around the doorframe, and out of his gaze I broke the grips of the guards and took off running.

  Hands grabbed out and armor flashed against me as I flew through the castle, dress wadded up in one hand, hair disheveled and flowing. I almost made it to the grand hall before they caught me, fought them long enough for the other guards to pass, and was close enough to hear the beginning of the end.

  Chapter2- To Escape the Nightmares

  My old nursery was now a forgotten place with no purpose but storage. Things like old books, tapestries, and a worn spinning wheel cluttered the space. I sit cross-legged on the ground, feeling much like one of those disregarded objects.

  I clung to hazy memories of the days I had spent here in innocent bliss, with Alexandra not so full of anxiety, Joseph ever teasing her with a more youthful smile and a more hopeful spark in his eyes.

  There was silence in the dusty air that had accepted my sobbing, a swiftly approaching moonless night bringing darkness to the already dismal atmosphere. My head filled such silence with a relentless replay of the crack of the shots drowning out the chorus of screams.

  I stood and began to pace the room in purposelessness, brushing aside a tapestry to reveal a mural flaking away from the abuse of time, as vague as the memory of it. It portrayed a rolling landscape of mythical creatures: a sphinx regarding nymphs around a river, phoenix and Pegasus whirling around the sky, and a dragon’s shadow on the distant mountains.

  A dark thing caught my eye in the corner, a figure surprising unworn like the others. A Journeyer, a robed humanoid figure with seemingly no arms, considering its garb had no sleeves. It had a head like an owl, face hidden and pointed ears sloped across the top of its head. The white heart-shaped mask was a startling contrast against its black cloth, brightly accented by the intricate patterns of blue around its shoulders and feet. I had almost forgotten about it. So out of place, such an odd thing to have on a child’s wall, a messenger of darkness and nightmares in most myths.

  Or perhaps it was an omen of truth.

  I let the tapestry slip out of my hands and fall back over it, the sun having faded away so far I feared someone would come looking for me. I desperately wanted to avoid any sort of interaction.

  As I snuck back through the castle there was a bleak sort of acquiescence about the halls, a mourning for what had occurred on these grounds. It simply made me number. I felt like a ghost in a corpse, my mind wandering somewhere else and my heart heavy and stiff in my chest.

  While it would have been incredibly simpler to walk by the guards in the hall to my room, I decided that I would rather climb the walls of my tower in my fancy dress- that was quite shabby by now- than have to look another person in the eye. The sudden sound of whispering voices made my hand pause over the windowsill, desperate hushed tones that brought me more confusion when I realized it was Joseph and Alexandra.

  I jumped into the window, intending to dismiss them. Alexandra let out a muffled yelp, hand slapping over her lips as her wide eyes darted to me.

  Her free hand was balled up around a pair of boots and a satchel, my clothes and belongings scattered around her. Joseph was holding a single thief’s lantern, the light dimmed, and he was wearing a crimson cloak over his armor.

  It took a moment for my accession of the situation to comprehend what was going on, “What are you two doing!?” I hissed.

  “If only I hadn’t let you and Donovan leave!” Alexandra wailed, words jumbled with guilt.

  “No one and everyone is to blame”, Joseph whispered.

  She began to grab for random articles of clothing, “You need to change!” she insisted.

  “No, we need to go”, Joseph shut the panel of the lantern, plunging us into almost complete darkness.

  “Go!?” I shuffled my way uncertainly towards them, “Go where!?”

  “Away from here. Away from things like what happened today,” Joseph said bitterly.

  I could hear Alexandra blubbering something as his calloused hand grabbed my own, “You are like a daughter to me, Atlas, and I stand by and watch such pain be inflicted upon you. This war and Varrick’s madness have gone too far, and I have to take you away from it.”

  “There is no escape from madness and war”, I said, “But I will always trust you.”

  My heart was fluttering with the concept of being free of this castle, away from the false respect, and familiar faces that were as awkward as strangers, but another part of me feared the oncoming unknown, having never known anything but that life of necessary evil.

  An idea occurred to me and I turned to Alexandra, grabbing a small slatted pigeon box off the table, sending her to get one as Joseph surveyed the passing guard below.

  “Joseph”, I said, another concern making itself present, “What about Donovan? If we disappear, he will be the first outlet for Varrick’s wrath.”

  “I was going to tell you that too. He, his family, and their assets have fled the city.”

  That set oddly with me. Donovan’s father was an earl, if someone of his power was fleeing, what would that influence entail? With both of us gone, it would reflect horribly on Varrick. And how would I find Donovan now?

  It left me uneasy. Surely I would see him again.

  As soon as the patrol was out of sight, Joseph dropped out of the open window, the four short swords on his back catching some distant light. I was mildly disappointed that he still couldn’t find my koras.

  He descended the tower with ease, Alexandra joined us again and immediately attempted to follow, her boldness surprising me,
but her foot slipped as she caught a glimpse of the ground, and she immediately flattened herself to the wall of the tower, hands so tight on the windowsill it seemed her fingernails were biting into the stone. I grabbed her wrist in a delayed reaction, her lips a pale hairline underneath her terrified eyes.

  I knew the patrol would make another round any second now, sending me into a small panic. Even on a moonless night, a petrified maid clinging to the window of the tower was going to be hard to miss.

  “C’mon Alex!” Joseph hissed.

  “I- c-can’t”, she squeaked, taking a quick glance at him and growing stiffer.

  Despite the distance, I could hear him softly chuckling, “I can see up your skirt!”

  And with that tease she went scrambling down the tower, crashing to a halt on the ground and slapping Joseph just as I reached them.

  “Let’s move”, he commanded, grabbing Alexandra’s wrists long enough to get her away from him while she spat out hushed curses.

  We followed the sounds of his muffled armor across the grounds, flinching at every patrol and spying shadow. As we transgressed the outskirts of the garden, snapping branches and leaves sounded like gunfire, every silence awaited our capture.

  I could not help the mischievous smile that crept over my lips as we snuck like bandits through the night. What would the people say when they discovered I was gone?

  What would Varrick think? Would he be relieved that I was gone? Would he care? Would any?

  Joseph brought us to a halt, drawing us close to him. As Alexandra’s bag brushed against me I thought I heard the pigeon cluck softly, and I prayed it get no louder.

  A shadow moved to my side, barley too slow to be the wind, but far too fast to be a living being, and so I dismissed it as a figment of my paranoia.

  But that’s when the feeling of being watched began.

  I opened my mouth to say something but Joseph urged us on, the recent patrol disappearing around the corner, we swiftly crossed the expanse of the garden, stopping at the hedges on the northern wall, the sounds of the city below and beyond. He pulled the ivy away from the stone. He opened his lantern just enough to light what he was doing, and pulled a small section of the wall free.

  He motioned us inside. I tripped and bumped my head, that the passage opening directly onto stairs. I pushed Alexandra’s head down as she entered to save her from a similar fate, and Joseph finally joined us, sliding the section of wall back over the entry and fully opening his lantern to reveal the stairway curling off around a bend. A light wind teased through, filling the way with cool fresh air.

  The king strode with heavy steps and a distracted mind towards the eastern tower, stoic guards bowing as he went, uneasy gloom around every corner. He toyed with the blue rose in his hands, turning it back and forth with nervous energy.

  He was losing control. He could feel it slipping from his fingers, and he was helpless to stop it. He feared the oncoming storm, one he knew he couldn’t stop, one he was preparing for, and one that he could tell none about for it would only prove that he was mad.

  He nodded and smiled at each guard as they addressed him, wondering what inner dispositions were held behind those stone-like faces. How many resented him now? It could not be any more than he towards himself.

  With a tired sigh, he paused at the door, rapping the back of his hand softly against it, “Atlas, I need to speak with you.”

  At the silence, he laid his forehead against the wood and spoke louder, “Atlas, please.”

  He started to reach for the doorknob, halting apprehensively before his hand ever touched it.

  “I-I cannot imagine how you feel- so- please- I beg you- just- give- give me a moment- Atlas- I’m so . . .sorry.”

  He stood still and silent for a long moment at the lack of reply, his good judgement telling him not to give his impatience the satisfaction of barging in. However, he wasn’t so reserved about the privacy of her maid.

  He turned and slung the adjacent door open, expecting her, with her nocturnal tendencies, to still be awake.

  The darkness of the room revealed that that was not the case.

  He went no further than the doorframe, speaking loudly, “Alexandra, wake Atlas, I need to speak with her.”

  His eyebrows scrunched together, surely she wasn’t that heavy of a sleeper, “Alexandra!” he took a step further towards the bed, eyes adjusting to the darkness before he realized no one was in it.

  An ill sort of chill started to creep its way into him and he tried to calm himself, whirling back out into the hallway, fists balled, “Atlas!” his hand came to a sharp halt on the locked knob.

  He stared at it dumbly for less than a second, grabbing the key ring from his belt, fumbling for the right one and finally fitting it swiftly in the lock. He strode into the room, to be stopped dead in his tracks, eyes dashing wildly at the strewed belongings and clothes. The rose fell from his hand. His first instinct was a robbery of some sort but that wouldn’t mean Alexandra would be gone as well-

  That infernal maid and knight.

  He jerked quickly to the window, as if expecting them to still be climbing down, and greeted with nothing but darkness he turned to scream for the guards.

  I cocked my head as I watched Joseph descend down the stone stairs “What is this? Where does it lead?” I asked him at barely above a whisper.

  He led ahead of me with Alexandra leaning over his shoulder, the height of the ceiling steadily increasing as we traversed. He completely disregarded my hushed tone, his gravely baritone rumbling over the stone, “It goes through Moontear Mines and comes out by Trammelfell. From there we’ll take a ferry across the gulf to Hythe. From there we’ll go west towards the mountains and the border. I have an old friend that should still be near Voltaren and it’s on the opposite side of the world from Varrick.”

  “‘Should be’, that’s reassuring”, Alexandra began, “And your plan is to shelter with your random friends while we run about like highwaymen?”

  “That about sums it up”, he grinned at her and with her scowl he sighed, “I’ll play my cards on what’s best for Atlas, and I will take care of both of you. This is both an adventure and a journey to safety, to freedom. We are under no command but that of destiny. But we do so with caution.”

  “That might inspire me if I was a seasoned warrior and not a maid”, Alexandra grumbled.

  “The warrior-princess is inspired if that helps any” I chimed in.

  Alexandra huffed out something under her breath that received an exasperated “hush” from Joseph.

  The tunnel’s carved walls morphed into natural stone with hand-hued beams weaved throughout. Thinking of something, I called out to Joseph.

  “Yes?” he replied.

  “How did you know about this escape route?” I asked.

  “I was toured when your mother put you under my protection,” he said nonchalantly.

  “Of course I wasn’t allowed to know” I huffed.

  “I cannot believe we’re doing this”, Alexandra grumbled.

  Despite the location, I still felt the burning sensation of eyes on me, “Is there, uh, any chance we could’ve been followed?” I asked.

  Alexandra looked about wildly until Joseph gave a definite “no.”

  “Are you getting paranoid, Atlas? Only the innermost circle of the knights were entrusted with the knowledge, and it was to be used only in the most dire of situations, such as today’s events. Varrick may not even know of it . . . then, again, he might . . .”

  We passed a beam marked with red and white slashes. Joseph blew his lantern out as we rounded the corner, a satisfied smile coming over his lips as Alexandra and I gasped.

  An intricate abandoned mine opened up before us, surely as tall as the castle itself, lit almost completely by clusters of cool colored luminescent crystals dotting across the rocks like stars on an intimate sky. Bright as flame, but less harsh of a light.

  “What-What stone is this?” Alexandra asked, hands hovering
over the nearest crystal as if afraid it was too precious to touch.

  “It’s called Moontear, hence the name of the mine,” Joseph’s sarcasm teased her.

  “Why is it abandoned?” I asked as Alexandra crossed her arms.

  “The man that once owned it mined all the gold out of it and left these stones after he transferred his investments into silver mines out in the dessert, not realizing the worth of the crystals. As things become abandoned, the memories become forgotten. So the knights of the Guild saw usefulness in the proximity of the mine system to the castle and decided to make it into an escape route, turning a forgotten thing into a well-kept secret,” Joseph’s eyes reflected the sparkling colors as he spoke, his voice echoing slightly in the endless silence.

  Alexandra and I moved after him in complete amazement, and though we still moved down through the same large room to begin with, each new angle of the glowing stones and shafts around us was a fresh and stunning take on the wonderment of the mine.

  “Imagine what these would be worth”, Alexandra whispered.

  “Greed would ruin it”, I said, not particularly attempting to criticize her, “Its beauty would be squandered and destroyed if it was for wealth.”

  “Although”, I said, feeling hypocritical, “Can I have one?” My eyes fell on a broken crystal the size of my hand.

  “Don’t make it too publicly known that you have it, but yes, I suppose you can”, Joseph said with a shrug.

  I grabbed the blue crystal as we walked by it, putting it in Alexandra’s satchel. My pigeon expressed its surprise. It illuminated several oilcloth wrapped items, presumably food, but also the sleek black barrel of a pistol at the bottom of the bag.

  With my excessive examining she pulled the bag away, giving me a silent questioning stare as we trekked on. We moved through the maze of the mine in a way that made me excessively grateful for Joseph’s sharp memory in the confusing but beautiful mess of tunnels and rooms.