by A. L. Brooks
It was as if a dam had burst within her. She’d been so adept at locking up her feelings, not expressing what she felt about anything over the last two years. Now, she couldn’t stop. She was terrified Jenny wouldn’t give them a chance, that she’d walk away deeming Olivia too much trouble to be bothered with.
“That’s just playing dirty again,” Jenny said, but her crooked smile sent a wave of relief washing through Olivia.
“Just being honest.” Olivia’s voice was a rough croak.
Jenny drained the last of her beer. “Can I use your bathroom?”
“Sure.” Olivia’s heart thudded. Was this a precursor to Jenny leaving? “It’s through the bedroom, which is the first door on your left when you go back out to the hallway.”
“Okay.” Jenny stood and left the room.
Olivia watched her go, trying to quell the sinking feeling in her belly.
Jenny slowly washed her hands and even more slowly dried them. She needed thinking time. Time to process all she had learned, not just with Olivia’s words, but also by her demeanor. She had seemed so scared Jenny was about to bolt. To be fair, there was a part of Jenny that wanted to do just that.
Olivia had lied to people she cared about to convince them she was in love with a man.
Jenny had never met anyone who had done something like this, and she didn’t know how to handle the knowledge that Olivia had been prepared to go to those lengths. Olivia, who had been such an ally to Jenny with the proposal for the project change. Olivia, who had been prepared to risk her own position at C&V, such was her conviction in Jenny’s ideas.
Olivia, who had kissed Jenny in a way her body still remembered in exquisite detail two weeks later.
Okay, brain, the kissing should not be a factor in this. It has to be all about her character, not her stupidly sexy lips.
She looked round at her surroundings. The bathroom was gorgeous, way nicer than the one she and Carl shared in their apartment. The towels looked super fluffy, the tiles and shower screen in the shower enclosure were both shiny, and all the paint was still on the walls. She couldn’t compete with this, what being married to Broderick had given Olivia.
True, a little voice in her brain replied, but she still wants to date you.
Olivia’s perfume and makeup were lined up in a neat row at the back of the vanity. Jenny lifted the perfume bottle and brought it to her nose. She inhaled the scent and blinked. It didn’t smell anywhere near as nice as it did when it was on Olivia’s skin.
The idea that she and Olivia could date sent shivers of excitement coursing down Jenny’s body. They could talk, and share, and there would definitely be more kissing, of that she was certain. But who would she be dating? The Olivia who’d lied for so long to so many people, or the Olivia who’d become someone Jenny wanted to spend time with, to be around, because Olivia had made Jenny feel good about herself?
She lied to everyone for one specific purpose, her rational brain offered. She hasn’t told you a single lie other than that in the whole time you’ve known her.
Ah yes, but if she can lie like that, what else can she do? her emotional brain responded.
Jenny ran her hands through her hair. She’d been too quick to trust Chrissy, and look where that had got her. Equally, she’d been slow to trust Olivia, but look where she was now: in Olivia’s bathroom after having just been asked out. And Olivia had made sure Jenny knew exactly what was going on before she asked. That definitely had to count for something, didn’t it?
She left the bathroom.
Barnaby looked up from his bed, blinking sleepily at her.
She gazed down at him. Dogs were good judges of character, she’d heard. And here he was, comfortably sleeping outside Olivia’s door.
Olivia faced her when Jenny walked back into her living room.
It was a lovely room and everything in it spoke of the Olivia she’d come to know these past few weeks. There were photos on the shelves, which Jenny presumed were of Olivia’s family and friends back home. Beautiful artwork was on the walls, all warm colors and sensual shapes. The feel of the room itself, all of it comfy and inviting.
Her gaze fell on Olivia—who sat upright, tense, and clearly nervous—at the end of the couch. Jenny had kept a distance between them originally because she’d still been reeling from Olivia’s revelations and hadn’t wanted her physical presence to distract her. Now, she had an urgent need to have Olivia close. Very deliberately, Jenny stepped around the coffee table and sat next to her.
Olivia’s eyes widened, but she said nothing.
“So, you mentioned something about going on a date?” Jenny smiled when Olivia visibly relaxed.
“I believe I did, yes,” Olivia said huskily. “Is that…is that a yes?”
“It is. I think getting to know each other would be a good idea. I mean, it’s obvious we’re attracted to each other.” Jenny chuckled. “Definitely no doubt about that.”
Olivia blushed sweetly, and Jenny stroked the heated skin of her cheek with her fingertips; Olivia trembled beneath the touch.
Something cut loose in Jenny. The last shred of hesitancy departed. She knew she wanted this. Wanted Olivia. And she knew she was prepared to risk it all going wrong because Olivia made her feel this way. Hot and cold all over and excited and scared and oh so desperate for those lips on hers once more.
“Jenny.”
The word was nothing more than a whisper, but it held a power Jenny couldn’t fight, even if she’d wanted to. She slid her hand around the back of Olivia’s head, clenched her fingers loosely in her soft hair, and pulled her in.
The kiss was soft to start with. Slow, sensuous movements of lips on lips. Each of them sighed softly as the kiss lengthened. Then it deepened, their tongues meeting and lightly stroking, and Jenny’s heart pounded in her ears when Olivia’s hands fumbled in their haste to grab onto Jenny’s hips and pull her closer.
Olivia groaned, and Jenny’s limbs went weak at the sound. She fumbled with the bottom of Olivia’s sweater and worked her hands underneath until, for the first time, she touched Olivia’s skin. It was as warm and soft as she’d imagined, but also firmer and more toned. The combination made her throb, and she dug her fingers into Olivia’s back, making her groan once more.
Olivia pulled back for one second; her hazel eyes locked onto Jenny’s, hypnotizing her with their intensity. Then Olivia swept back in and plundered her mouth.
Jenny wondered if she’d even survive this kiss; immolation was a distinct possibility. She didn’t know how long they kissed, but she knew she didn’t want it to end.
Their hands ran up each other’s backs, fingers stroking heated skin, their hips pressing closer together as their mouths hungrily tasted each other. Things were moments away from getting to the ripping-off-clothes stage.
However, Jenny knew she wasn’t a sex-on-the-first-date kinda girl, so when a strange scratching sound reached her ears, she was happy at the interruption. Mostly. “What is that?” She kept hold of Olivia but raised her head.
Olivia opened her eyes and pulled back, breathing heavily. “I think…” She cleared her throat then smiled. “I think that’s Barnaby. I think he’s trying to tell me he needs his evening walk.”
“Aw.”
“He has impeccable timing.” Olivia tutted.
“A bit like your mother-in-law.” Jenny grinned. “Do you think she set him up to it?”
Olivia groaned. “God, I still can’t believe we came that close that time.”
“I still can’t believe you kissed me that time.”
Her blush returning, Olivia shook her head. “Nor can I. But in that moment, when you were defending me so fiercely, I honestly couldn’t stop myself.”
Jenny swallowed. The passion in Olivia’s voice was thrilling. “I’m glad you didn’t. Even though it confused the crap out of me for days.”
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Olivia’s smile was rueful. She made to speak, but the scratching sound came again, louder this time. She extricated herself from Jenny’s arms. “Nature calls.” She pointed at the door. Then she tilted her head. “Do you maybe want to come with us? We don’t go far.”
“That sounds nice.” Jenny eased back in her seat. “And would you maybe want to get something to eat together after? I’m starving.”
Olivia smirked. “Hangover worn off?”
“Definitely.”
“Then I think that sounds like a great plan.”
They gazed at each other as they stood.
“I’m so glad you came over.” Olivia took Jenny’s hand. “And I’m so glad you didn’t run away afterwards.”
Jenny held her thumb and forefinger an inch or so apart.
“Yes, I thought it might have been close.”
“I want to trust you. But I realized to do that, I have to give you a chance.”
“You won’t regret it.” Olivia’s voice was strong. “I know it’s early days, and we might find we’re not actually meant to be together after all. But I’m so glad we’re going to try to find out.”
“Me too.” Jenny dropped a soft, quick kiss on Olivia’s lips. “So, let’s take care of that poor mutt, then start getting to know each other.”
Chapter 30
“What happened?” Tamara asked two minutes after Jenny arrived at their apartment for Sunday lunch. “You didn’t return any of my texts yesterday, and now you’re standing on our doorstep with what can only be described as a ‘glow’ about you.”
Jenny sighed. She’d hoped to keep this to herself for a while, see how things worked out with Olivia before she shared it. Clearly her personal stealth mode was faulty. “Can I at least get my coat off before the inquisition starts?”
Tamara snorted but stepped aside to allow Jenny entrance. “I might even let you have a beer too.” Her tone was gentler than her opening words.
Smiling, Jenny followed Tamara into the living room, where she discovered she was last to arrive; Carl and Solomon sat close together on the couch. She greeted them and then Roz, then took the beer Tamara brought her. “Cheers!” She raised the bottle.
The first sip had barely been swallowed when Tamara said, “Well?”
Lying wasn’t an option, but telling them what Olivia had done for Broderick wasn’t possible either. Olivia hadn’t asked her to keep that part to herself, but Jenny had decided the less people that knew the better for Olivia and Broderick. So, she chose her words carefully. “She and her husband are getting a divorce. It’s all totally amicable; I met him while I was there and he’s a nice guy. They’re in separate rooms and all that.” She paused, figuring out how to explain the next part. “She realized a while back that she was attracted to me but didn’t think she stood a chance after Chrissy played her games. You know, making me not trust Olivia.” There were nods all around from her engrossed audience. “She’s dated women in the past so this isn’t some kind of experimenting thing. She’s really interested in me.”
“Well, who wouldn’t be?” Roz spread her arms wide.
Jenny grinned. “Obviously.”
“And you believe all this?” Tamara frowned.
“I do.” Jenny took another gulp of her beer. “But I’m not rushing into things. Yesterday we kept it simple—took her neighbor’s dog for a walk and had some Vietnamese takeout. Then I went home. No sleepover,” she added with a wry smile. “She knows I need time to trust this. And I know how quick I’ve rushed into things before and made mistakes. Not this time.”
“I think that’s great,” Tamara said. “I’m proud of you.”
“Yeah, I get that,” Roz said, “but, you know, don’t stop yourself from having a good time at the same time.” She leaned forward in her seat to stare intently at Jenny. “Don’t be too careful, or maybe you’ll stall it before it even gets started.”
“She needs to be careful.” Tamara’s tone was sharp. “You know what’s happened in the past with people she cared about letting her down. Remember her shitty parents and all they did? And last year, all that crap with Brandi and—”
“She’s a grown-up!” Roz’s expression softened as her partner threw her a hurt look. “I know you worry about her, about all of us. But sometimes, babe, you worry too much. Jenny’s got this. I can see it in her eyes.”
“She’s right,” Carl chimed in. “Mother Hen can back off a ways now.” He spoke gently and gave Tamara a warm look.
Tamara glared at them all, then looked directly at Jenny for a few moments. Then, almost imperceptibly, she nodded. “Maybe you’re both right. I can’t help it.” Her voice was low and laden with emotion. “Ever since that night her so-called parents kicked her out, I…” She swallowed visibly. “I’ve never seen anyone so scared and broken.”
Jenny’s eyes welled up. She moved across the room to kneel beside Tamara’s chair. “That was then.” Her voice was rough, her throat tight. “But I’ve got a great life now, and that’s no small thanks to you. I’m okay. Honest. You don’t have to stop caring about me, but you can loosen up a little.”
Tamara pulled her into a hug and rocked her. “I’ll try. Just tell me whenever I’m overdoing it, okay?”
“Don’t worry, I will.” Jenny gave her a crooked smile.
Wednesday evening couldn’t come around quick enough for Olivia. She’d known Jenny leaving on Saturday evening after their takeout meal was the right thing to do. She knew Jenny needed time, and to be honest, so did she. But watching her leave after they’d shared such a lovely few hours together had been hard.
After she’d closed the front door, Broderick had been there, opening his arms to give her a brief hug. “I’m so glad we did this. You already look so much lighter.”
She’d hugged him tighter, tears threatening to spill once more. Then she’d returned to her bedroom, beckoned Barnaby to follow her, and snuggled with the dog down at her feet for the night. She didn’t even care that, once again, she awoke freezing cold at four a.m. and fought him for the duvet.
She and Jenny had swapped a few messages on Sunday, which had been nice. On Monday, Olivia had worked hard to maintain a professional exterior when Jenny arrived in the office wearing a pair of cool, dark-brown cargo pants that hugged her ass and seemed to short-circuit Olivia’s brain.
Jenny had caught Olivia’s gaze wandering and smirked as she blushed. Thankfully, their new roles had finally brought them a big pile of work each, and that kept them apart for the rest of the day and through Tuesday.
But now it was Wednesday, and that meant their next date. If Saturday had even counted as their first date—did revealing your enormous secret and confessing you’d lied to pretty much everyone you care about on something as important as your sexuality count as good first date material?
Olivia wasn’t sure, but given that it hadn’t sent Jenny running for the hills, she was just happy they’d got this far. They’d agreed to meet at a vegetarian Indian place Jenny knew of near Columbia, and both had readily agreed to leave the office separately and rendezvous at the subway nearest the restaurant. While it wasn’t against company policy for peers to date, unlike the manager-subordinate position Derek and Chrissy had put themselves in, neither Olivia nor Jenny were ready to shout about whatever this was between them.
At that thought, Olivia remembered Derek’s job was soon to be advertised, and that Maxwell had recommended she go for it. But if I do that and get it, where does that leave Jenny and me?
That was a problem for another day. For now, she was going on a date with a woman with green hair. The new color had appeared on Monday morning, and Jenny had laughed at Olivia’s raised eyebrow.
Jenny left the office first, a little after six, and Olivia followed a few minutes later. Jenny waited for her at the subway station, and Olivia’s stomach performed a happy little dance routine at
the sight. She very nearly snorted at herself.
They didn’t kiss in greeting; it had been Jenny who’d surprised Olivia with her consideration for Olivia’s position, her thoughtfulness in suggesting public displays of affection should be avoided for now. It might seem ridiculous to think anyone connected to Broderick’s racing world—or family—would spot them and it cause them any problems, but the world could be incredibly small sometimes, so why take the risk?
Besides, it added a certain delicious tension to the evening that made Olivia’s skin heat in ways she wasn’t sure she’d experienced before now.
“Hi.” Jenny smiled warmly. “You okay?”
“Very.” Olivia’s voice was low and a little husky, and she reveled in the effect it had on Jenny, as evidenced in the darkening of her eyes and the slight hitch in her breath.
“Ready to eat?” Jenny’s words came out in a squeak.
“Yes, please. I’m starving!”
Jenny chuckled. “Then let’s go.”
Before long, they were seated in a plain, rather shabby restaurant a couple blocks from the subway. It might have looked a little rough, but the amazing scents coming from the kitchen had Olivia ignoring their surroundings and focusing instead on the menu. “How do you know about this place?” she asked after they’d ordered plain seltzer to drink and some samosas to munch on as a starter.
“When my friends and I all arrived here in New York, we had zero money. We quickly learned where all the good—but cheap—places are for a meal out. We still couldn’t do it often but at least we could have a night out now and then and not break the bank.”
“So where are you actually from? Wait, Pittsburgh, hence the helmet?”
Jenny made a “ding” sound and grinned. “Correct, ten points.” She fiddled with her glass. “Yeah, good old Pittsburgh.”