He’s not Taylor.
He wasn’t and never would be, this man so full of his secrets. I wanted him to tell me, show me how he felt, and if I did one thing tonight, I could show him I not only trusted him but had faith in him too.
He squeezed me to him, taking deep and greedy breaths as he pleasured my sex. Shuddering, he actually groaned before dragging slow dips of his tongue between my folds.
“It’s been too long, Cami,” he said, sucking. He went for my clit and rose from his haunches to take me.
And then came his teeth.
Delightfully stimulating nibbles nearly brought me down to my knees, and using my core, I wrapped my legs around his head. I rocked my hips into his face, using strength I didn’t even know I had.
“Fuck, Cami. Fuck…”
He ate me—hard and didn’t try to be gentle about it. He braced my thighs to his head and I doubted he could breathe with the lack of air I allowed him to have. My hips steady, I was just as greedy for his mouth as he was to please me. His tongue entering me, he used it to funnel my juices into his mouth, his body shaking beneath my legs.
“Colton…”
I mean, what else could I have said? This man was so hot and needy beneath me, wanting me when he could have anyone. He literally had everything he ever wanted, but in this moment, he was here in my room. He was with me, and overwhelmed by that, I allowed him to have me, to taste me in the ways he said he missed. My body shuddering, the fire in my belly came all too quick, but I didn’t fight it. I wanted it to happen.
I wanted to come and only by his hand.
Colton slowed his tastes during my orgasm, bringing me down from the high like he had that night. Forcing my thighs apart, he made me widen for him, exposing me in ways I had never been exposed. He made me face him full on. He didn’t let me hide.
“So beautiful,” he rasped, kissing my mound. I hadn’t shaved again, and his tongue danced along the hairs. I’d never shave again if he liked them.
Closing my eyes, my entire body felt numb. Like I couldn’t do any more, standing a complete and total feat. I slumped, but he caught me, and before I knew it, he was on his feet and carrying me.
He cradled me like a damsel, so small in his large arms. Placing me on the bed, he remained that massive guy, nothing on but his boxers and dress shirt.
Wanting to see him, I got up on my knees, unbuttoning a shirt nearly as sharp blue as his azure eyes. Those irises followed along with the movement of my fingers, observant and ready. Gripping my wrists, he allowed me to move his shirt down his powerful shoulders and back.
Golden flesh flexed and shifted with only subtle movements, Colton’s body athletic perfection. He worked hard for his body, one of the hardest workers I knew despite what he said to me. Upon sliding his shirt away, his pecs jumped, brown nipples warm and hot under my hands.
He drew in a breath as I touched him, and shifting me on my back, he covered me.
“You’re safe with me,” he said, bending to capture my mouth, but before he could, I stopped him. I already knew I was safe with him, that he’d never do what my ex did to me.
“You’re safe with me,” I emphasized, reaching down to take his hand. I placed it over my heart while I touched his. “And you’ll always be, Colton. Always.”
I wanted to tell him something he needed to know, so many… trials I felt within this man. He seemed like he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders since that day, well, that day I found him.
He’d been in so much pain—and not just the obvious physical trauma. The war within himself I had seen in his eyes, and the fact he’d told me not to tell his family, the people he was the closest to in life, about what I walked into that night spoke volumes to me. He didn’t want them to see that part of himself.
He didn’t want them to see his pain.
I’d seen glimpses of it every day since, some days more than others, but it was always there at least a little. He was going through something, and whatever it was…
It made him hurt himself.
I could see the pain in his eyes just as well as I did on the days he let it slip, and when he took my hand from his heart, touching it to his lips, he closed his eyes.
“You see me…” he said, opening them. “You’re the only one.”
The shine in his eyes was definitely noticeable, but he closed them again before I could see it anymore. He pressed his mouth hard to mine, and that kiss, though just as warm and hot as before, held a desperation I’d never felt. It was like he was trying to find something in me.
Like he was trying to get safety from me.
I readily gave it, lifting my mouth for him to have. From before, I could still taste myself on his lips, and the combination of us set me off in ways I’d never experienced. He turned me on in so many ways, brought things out of me I’d never before seen, and I believed I did that for him too.
His boxers slid down his chiseled hips, his cock sharp and erect. Thick and full, he massaged its girth before letting me.
“It’s yours,” he said, pumping into my hand. “I’m yours.”
His voice weak, vulnerable, he pushed his mouth onto my neck. He allowed me to hold him, stroke him, while he bowed his head in submission. He gave me all control, and I didn’t know what to say.
“I do see you,” I ended up saying, tasting his perfect lips. Opening them, he gave me even more access, holding me close before taking me with him when he fell to his back. There, he worked a toiletry bag open on his nightstand, pulling a condom out.
“Come to me,” he said, sliding a condom on before bringing me forward. “And let me see you.”
Warm fingers undid the clasp of my bra, and soon, I was just as naked as he was, exposed. In the dimly lit bedroom, neither of us did anything at first, just watching each other.
Colton’s finger explored, his long digit traveling slowly down my body. He brushed my shoulder, my arm, and when he circled a nipple, I drew in a breath. He pinched one of them between two fingers, and at the same time, he brought me down on his cock.
“Cami…”
He said what I felt, our bodies completely right for each other despite his large size. I had womanly curves which could sustain his frame, and we easily met in the middle. His hips moved with intention, slow and not without purpose. He knew what he was doing, how to love.
“Let me see you, Cami,” he repeated, making my eyes open when he touched my cheek. “I love to see you.”
He loved to see me… His words were filled with something I felt deeply in my bones. He may not have said he loved me, but there was no mistaking how I felt. I think I loved my boss.
I wondered for how long.
My eyes rolling back, I felt that love, that pain so deliciously right between my legs. His cock full and deep, he filled me up and made me feel so many things. Taking me on my back, he drilled his powerful hips, making me call out for him. I couldn’t help it, each word a pull from my lips. I felt so much love in my heart, and I wasn’t surprised when I parted my lips.
“I love you, Colton,” I said and couldn’t contain the words because they felt right. I watched Colton’s reaction to them. He didn’t say anything, but he did slow a little, a hesitation in his body. All too quickly, it was gone, and before I knew it, he was kissing me.
His lips warmed, still no words said, but I wondered if I needed to hear them. He was telling me so much with his mouth, his body. Taking me to my peak, he didn’t release my mouth. In fact, he kissed harder, faster, until I pooled around him so hard I didn’t think calling what I’d done an orgasm was the correct word. It was so much more powerful than that, something deeper, and he held me as I cried out and shuddered beneath him.
He hadn’t been far behind, almost waiting when his abs clenched, and his cock pulsed between my legs. Milking me, he made slow movements with his lips, his kisses lighter but just as heavy and weighted.
“Cami?” he questioned, and my heart leaped, wondering what he’d say next. I h
ad told him I loved him, and though he didn’t say it back, I had felt something from his end. It’d been passionate, fulfilled, and completely beautiful.
And it hadn’t been sad.
But there was sadness now, deep in his eyes, as he stared at me. Like everything we just experienced was over, and he woke up.
It was as if he was letting it go.
“Colton,” I said, reaching out to touch his cheek.
He grabbed my hand. “Will you stay with me?” he asked, unexpected. He kissed my palm. “Let me hold you tonight?”
The fact he felt he had to ask me hurt, but it didn’t hurt me. I felt for him and only him.
What’s wrong?
He didn’t tell me, and I gave him my answer when I brought my arms around him and let him hold me. He obviously needed something from me much deeper than this.
I just wish he’d tell me.
Chapter Sixteen
Cami
Stirring, the buzz of a cellphone hummed me awake after what seemed like only moments of sleep later. It came from Colton’s side of the room, a constant buzz, and turning, I realized I was still in his arms. A large arm wrapped tight around me. I was pressed to his chest, and he didn’t want to let me go.
“Will you stay with me?”
He’d sounded so… desperate, and holding him close, I lowered my mouth to his chest. A warm heat flowed off him, his arm gripping me closer. The cellphone continued to buzz, but he didn’t stir. I touched his face, his eyes closed with sleep.
He must be tired.
That was all I could gather and not wanting to wake him, I snuck out of bed to stop the phone. Naked, I toed over to his side of the room, grabbing his cell. Whoever wanted him could have him in the morning. He was tired, and lifting his phone, I went to turn it off and would have had I not seen the name on top.
Maggie.
Something made me read the start of the text message string. Mostly because there were so many. They were all from one person, this… Maggie.
Colton, I’m in town. Can I see you…?
This woman obviously could be anyone and was none of my business before what occurred tonight between Colton and me. I put the phone down, but it buzzed in my hand before I could place it on the end table.
Colton, I need you.
The word “need” made my swipe my finger across the screen, and the rest of the text messages kept me invested. He had a full text message screen from this woman “Maggie,” but the texts were pretty much one-sided. Things like “Please call me” and “I’m sorry.” Basically, there was a lot of apologizing, but from this one woman and nothing from him. She seemed like a possible bug-a-boo, but curious, I scrolled up to the very top of the conversation to find his texts. Once I found them, well, they didn’t stop.
Colton: Hey, it was good seeing you today.
Maggie: I’m glad we met. I’m glad I got to see you. You look so much like your poppa.
Colton: Thanks. Can I see you again? I’m so happy you contacted me.
Maggie: Of course. Anytime. Of course.
Several more, and my eyes were still reading, a long exchange dating back months…
Maggie: Thanks for getting lunch. I know you’re busy.
Colton: No problem, and I’m never too busy. Always call, please.
Dating back a year…
Maggie: I meant to call you today. Got caught up, but I wanted to see you. Really I did, Colt.
Dating back a year and a half…
Maggie: Hey, Colton. You there? Missed you today. I’m so sorry I couldn’t get out again.
Colton: It’s okay. I just really wanted to see you.
Maggie: I know. Me too. I really did mean to, but I recently got evicted. Rent sucks in this city. My super kicked me out, the ass.
Colton: Where are you staying? Do you need help?
Maggie: I couldn’t ask you that.
Colton: You didn’t. I offered. Please let me.
This had been the first occurrence, the first money exchange between him and this woman named Maggie. He’d dropped an envelope in the mail for her, a PO Box listed in Dallas, Texas.
Maggie: Colton, did you send the money?
The second time…
Maggie: Thanks for the money again. It really helped, and of course I’ll play you back.
The fifth time…
Maggie: Colton, it just might be easier if you wire the funds this time. The mail’s been running slow and a transfer is instant. I can get to a Walmart if you can do it through Western Union.
Colton: How about I just set up a bank account for you? I’d hate it if you weren’t able to pay your rent on time because of me. I’ve just been on the road like crazy lately, but I apologize.
Maggie: Oh, baby. Please don’t do that. You’re only helping me, and I’m so proud of my boy.
Her… boy.
The exchanges continued. The money continued as Colton set up a bank account in her name, calling it “Margret Applebee.” Margret…
Maggie: Honey… I’m so sorry I wasn’t there.
This wasn’t the first of this woman’s apologies for not being there, but this was the first time he hadn’t responded. It’d been the first time he hadn’t reciprocated, and I scrolled up, finding the exchange before.
Colton: I’m so excited you’re coming down here. And don’t be nervous. I’ll talk to Pop before you come. It’ll be cool.
Maggie: Colton… honey, your poppa doesn’t want me there. I told you I could come for your draft party, but…
His draft party?
Colton: Don’t… Don’t bow out. You said you’d come, and I promise it will be okay. I’ll make sure it is.
Maggie: What about your brothers?
Colton: They’ll be happy to see you as much as I was the first time. They’ll see you’ve changed. You’ve been sober, and they’ll see that. They just need to see for themselves like I did. Please… Just come. I need you there, and I’ll protect you.
Maggie: Okay.
Colton: Okay?
Maggie: Okay.
Colton: Thank you. It’s going to be great. You’ll see that.
But it wasn’t great. It wasn’t because she didn’t show, and as I watched a woman plea to a perfect stranger, a man who wasn’t this boy she spoke of, the anger rose in my veins. There’d been countless money exchanges, countless meetings over the course of a year and a half. Some of them were even during times I’d been with him. I traveled all over the world with this man, and during certain stops, he did go away. This woman seemed to always be there, lingering in the wind. Sometimes, he actually flew her out to where he was, to see him, and she came maybe one in five times he asked, usually after receiving money. Colton passed those absences off as being okay, and knowing him, I knew that to be true. Perhaps, it was okay. Perhaps, it was fine to give her money as long as she showed up to the last place he asked her to meet. His family held a huge draft party for him in Texas, the local politicians in attendance and everything. The entire city had basically been there, but one person who wasn’t was Colton. I barely saw him at all during the entire party and, after it was over, even less. We got on the plane, and the first thing he did when we got back to LA was throw another party for himself. He disappeared after that, and the next time I’d seen him…
He’d overdosed.
Blinking, I pushed my hand over my mouth, so many texts after that moment. So many texts of “sorry” and how she’d heard about what happened on the news. There were so many texts asking if what he’d done had been because of her.
None of them were answered.
Little to her knowledge, Colton hadn’t had access to his phone immediately after he ODed. In the hospital, he hadn’t checked his fucking phone, and this woman would have known that had she come out to see him. The only people at the hospital were his family and me, no one else. I knew because I was there.
Maggie: I know you’re in San Francisco. Please… if you can I want to see you.
So she w
as here now, was she?
Colton: Sure. I can meet you in about 30 min. Where do you want to meet up?
She immediately said for coffee in response to my text and that she’d be happy to see me, and I laughed. I just couldn’t help myself. She wouldn’t be happy after meeting me once she had to hear what I had to say.
And I’d make sure of that.
Chapter Seventeen
Cami
I arrived at the coffeehouse via our rental car, and I spotted the woman who’d been contacting Colton the moment I stepped inside.
Mostly because she was beautiful.
She’d chosen a table close to the cafe windows, easily spotted with her lengthy blonde hair and large eyes that took in the world. Currently, she had them honed in on the doorway I just walked in, her legs crossed and her wavy hair sitting on her shoulders. A few decades older than me, she had some years on her, but I only knew that from the age lines around her eyes and mouth. Time had seen those eyes, those features, and staring in wonder at her, I was easily fooled. I expected some kind of monster.
Mostly because that was how she’d been acting.
She’d treated Colton… cruelly, and I’d seen the evidence myself, a broken man who’d clearly wanted a connection to someone who only took advantage of him.
“Maggie?”
Eyes of a beautiful blue drifted toward me, so much like Colton and his brothers. I figured they got that from their dad as he was also blond and blue-eyed, a genetic trait. I guess between the pair, the men couldn’t grow up not to be beautiful.
Maggie’s gaze wandered, on the door, me, then past. She was clearly expecting someone else to walk through these doors, but if I had it my way, she’d never see Colton again. I was here to make sure of that. Her head rose as I approached her.
“Can I help you?” she asked me, uncrossing her legs, and without inviting myself, I took a seat at her table.
“Actually, yes,” I told her, placing my bag down in my lap. I wanted it away from her, as I had good reason not to trust her. “You know my friend. Colton Chandler.”
Colton (Found by You Book 7) Page 13