‘Yes, that’s what I should have done. I can quite see that now.’ Athena managed a ghost of a smile. ‘Would I have been in breach of contract for not telling him beforehand I was a virgin, do you suppose?’
‘What made you suggest lying with him immediately?’
Athena sighed. ‘I wanted to, Millie. All those years of waiting, never even being tempted, and then suddenly, it was all I could think about.’ She impatiently brushed away an errant tear. ‘I thought he felt the same way.’
‘He did, lamb. I’m sure of it.’
‘No, Millie. He was so cold, so angry with me. It was a side of him I’ve never seen before. He thought I had done it deliberately to exploit him in some way, you see. He wouldn’t even look at me once he knew.’
‘Well, I suppose you can’t blame him for that.’
‘Whose side are you on?’ Athena demanded hotly.
‘Put yourself in his position. He told you himself when you first met that people always want something from him.’
‘I suppose, but I thought I meant more to him than that.’
‘You do, never doubt it. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. When he’s had a chance to calm down and consider the matter, I’m sure he will want to apologise. It’s just a shame you didn’t get to tell him what we’re running from. That would have convinced him, if anything could, especially since the facts would be easy enough to verify.’
‘I was going to…afterwards.’ She shook her head. ‘Oh well, it’s too late now. The trust is gone. Shame, the house was lovely,’ she added, trying to sound casual and failing dismally.
‘What shall we do then?’
‘Move, I suppose.’ Athena sighed, wearied by the thought. ‘But we’ll wait until the duke’s house party is over and his guests have left. If Blake has found out, or even suspects we’re here, he will appear sometime today. You know how he never learned to be patient, so we must be vigilant. We shall simply remain hidden away for two more days, and that will give us a chance to lay proper plans.’ She flashed a wry grin, even though her heart broke anew each time she considered Eli’s cold reaction to her situation. Surely, a woman he admired offering him the gift of her virginity was a cause for celebration, not censure? ‘I hear Scotland is quite beautiful,’ she added whimsically.
‘If you want to go gallivanting north of the border, you can go without me, miss.’ Millie puffed out her ample chest. ‘Those Celts are barbarians. We would never be safe in our beds.’
Athena flashed a brief smile, thinking she at least would be perfectly safe since her virginity clearly didn’t have a value beyond rubies. ‘No, Millie, not Scotland. I shall think of somewhere easier to reach.’
‘There’s no rush, lamb. If Blake leaves Winsdale again without finding us, surely we’ll be safer here than anywhere?’
That was true, except Athena couldn’t possibly remain anywhere near Winsdale Park and have daily reminders of the man she loved. And who had rejected her.
Millie lumbered to her feet when the workmen came in to continue renewing the staircase. At least the cottage now smelled of freshly sawn wood rather than mould, even if they wouldn’t be here long enough to enjoy the new interior.
‘I’d best go and sit with the girls,’ she said.
‘Have something to eat first.’
‘No, Millie. I’m not hungry. Anything I attempted to eat would only stick in my throat.’
Millie tutted, but one of the workmen distracted her, and Athena took the opportunity to slip into the other room and join the twins. Their bright chatter helped to distract her, as did the calming normality of making lace.
‘Are you all right, Athena?’ Selene asked at once point. ‘You’re very quiet.’
‘And very pale,’ Lyssa added.
‘Oh, it’s nothing. I’m just tired and have a slight headache.’
‘You’re not ill?’ they asked together.
Their anxious faces brought her to her senses, and she summoned up a genuine smile of reassurance. They had suffered so much with the loss of their mother and father within a year of one another, and then all the unpleasantness that had followed. Athena had been their only constant throughout it all. They were still very vulnerable and would be devastated if anything happened to her.
‘I’m really quite well, girls,’ she said. ‘Now, you have yet to tell me everything that happened to you at the dance yesterday. I want to hear it all. Whom did you each dance with? Did you enjoy it as much as you thought you would?’
Suitably distracted, the girls were soon chatting away again and seemed not to notice when Athena fell into gloomy contemplation and sometimes forgot to respond to them.
The workmen left at dusk, and the cottage was theirs again. Millie was about to serve supper when Boris sat up and let forth with a volley of barks.
‘Someone is outside,’ Athena said tersely.
‘One of the men probably forgot something,’ Selene said, heading for the door.
‘Stay where you are!’ Athena’s sharp voice stopped her sister in her tracks. ‘Let me go.’
Athena peeped through the window, unsure if she was more relieved or distressed when she saw Eli’s curricle outside. He wasn’t driving it, though, and that was a disappointment. The man who alighted from the conveyance was the same one she had encountered on the track on the day Eli had his accident. He came up to the door and Athena opened it before he could knock, stepping outside to speak to him in private.
‘Good evening, madam,’ he said, doffing his hat. ‘I am Salter, his grace’s valet.’
‘Good evening, Mr Salter,’ Athena replied cautiously. ‘Are you lost?’
‘No, I come with a message from the duke.’
‘I see.’
He probably wants us to leave his property, Athena thought, accepting the note the man handed her with a heavy heart. He certainly hadn’t wasted any time getting over his brief interest in her. Her fingers trembled—a combination of worry and anger—as she broke the seal.
Athena, she read. We didn’t finish our conversation this morning, for which I hold myself responsible. I can’t get away for the next two days, but we have a masquerade ball at the Park tomorrow evening. Please come. My man will collect you, and we will be at leisure to resolve our differences then. Eli
Athena paced about in front of the cottage, unsure what to make of the note and it’s rather cold wording. That he wanted to speak to her at all implied he no longer thought her a fortune hunter, or worse, but he hadn’t actually apologised.
‘His grace sent a gown and mask for you to wear, if you agree to come,’ Mr Salter said, looking rather bored, indicating a package on the seat of the curricle, as though her acceptance was a foregone conclusion. Presumably, he acted as the duke’s go-between in such matters on a regular basis and never met with any opposition. Just for the hell of it, Athena was severely tempted to send him packing, but something stronger than her own determination prevented her.
‘Just a moment.’
Athena went back inside and told Millie and the astonished twins about the invitation.
‘What should I do?’ she asked Millie.
‘You should go,’ Millie replied without hesitation.
‘He should have apologised.’
‘About what?’ Selene asked.
‘This is an apology,’ Millie replied, ignoring Selene’s question. ‘He has a lot on his mind at the moment, and you will never forgive yourself if we leave here without clearing the air.’
‘Are we leaving again?’ Lyssa asked.
‘Oh, but we like it here.’
‘How can we talk at a masquerade when he will have four women vying for his attention the entire time?’
‘Easily, you will all be masked, and therefore unrecognisable,’ Millie said. ‘It makes a big difference to the way people behave, so I’m told. Besides, you will also get to see how the land lays with our other, er friend.’
She was referring to Blake, and it did make sense, Athena suppos
ed. But dare she be in the same room with her hated foe? The thought of being unidentifiable held a certain allure. And the prospect of seeing Eli again, even if it was just to give him a piece of her mind, set her pulses racing.
‘It’s not like you to back down from a challenge, lamb,’ Millie said mildly.
No, it was not. Athena elevated her chin. She was no coward. She would do this and emerge from it with her dignity intact, even if it left her heart in smithereens.
‘And nor shall I from this one,’ she replied with determination.
Athena returned outside and told Mr Salter she agreed. He smiled, as though he had always known she would and insisted upon carrying the gown and mask into the cottage himself.
‘I shall be here tomorrow evening at ten to collect you myself.’
‘So late?’
‘There is to be a dinner for the party guests, and then other attendees will arrive from all over the area. There will be over a hundred in total.’
Meaning Athena would pass unnoticed in such a crowd.
‘Very well. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, Mr Salter.’
‘Oh, Athena,’ Selene said the moment Salter had left, and she and Lyssa eagerly unwrapped the gown. ‘Just look at this.’
‘It must have cost a fortune, Athena,’ Lyssa added. ‘The duke must be violently in love with you.’
‘Dukes don’t fall in love with lace-makers, Lyssa.’
‘Well then, they should,’ Selene replied stoutly. ‘You are at least as good as those stuffy women up at the Park who want to marry him. And far prettier.’
‘You haven’t looked at your gown, Athena,’ Lyssa said impatiently.
Athena did look, and gasped. The magnificent gown Eli had sent for her to wear was of shimmering pale blue silk, with a silver spangled overskirt. The bodice was sewn with exquisite silver beads, as was the flounce. There were petticoats of the finest quality to go with it. What was it about Eli and petticoats, she wondered, unable to suppress a smile. The matching slippers would, she was sure, be a perfect fit. The half-mask was trimmed with silver beads and extravagant plumes. It was a perfect, confidence-giving disguise, meaning for once she could face Eli on equal terms, if only in terms of her apparel.
‘He must have sent to Portsmouth for it,’ she said, almost to herself. ‘Where else would he have found such a beautiful garment at such short notice?’
Chapter Sixteen
She was coming. Eli had been in torment until Salter returned from the cottage and told him she had agreed to attend the masquerade. He knew he had upset her, hadn’t thought she would want to know him anymore, and couldn’t altogether blame her for that. Her disinterest in his influential position was one of the many things that attracted him to her. But, in spite of her fears, in a few short hours Eli would see her again.
He was more nervous than he had been on his first day at his preparatory school, which was saying a lot. As a young boy of eight, he had been left to his own devices amongst a sea of older boys. They all seemed to know each other and looked upon the new intake, nervously huddled together in one corner of the cavernous hall, with speculative interest. Eli had rightly assumed his induction into school life would be brutal, teaching him hard lessons about life that were not on the curriculum.
He stood stock still as Salter brushed imaginary specs from his immaculate coat, trying to anticipate what he would say to her, and she to him. That he owed her an apology was beyond question. He had overreacted and knew without her having to convince him she hadn’t been trying to manipulate him for her own ends. It disgusted him that he could have entertained such a thought about his goddess and knew he thoroughly deserved her derision. When it came to Athena, he lost all sense of proportion because he wanted so badly for her to be what she appeared to be. He wanted even more for her to place her trust in him and allow him to slay all her dragons for her. By his stupid reaction to the precious gift she had offered him, he had made that task ten times harder to achieve.
But, he reminded himself, she was coming. She was actually coming, so there must be some small hope for him still. Now, the rest was up to him.
‘Still nothing from Jessop’s man in Nottingham?’ he asked Salter.
‘No, your grace, but Jessop lives in expectation of hearing something any hour now.’
‘Interrupt me if he does. I don’t care what I’m doing.’
‘As your grace wishes.’
For once, the prospect of the dinner to come didn’t fill him with dread. He could fend off his would-be brides easily enough, and would get through it by separating his mind from his body—another skill he had learned at school. Masks wouldn’t be donned until the meal was completed and the rest of the guests had arrived. Eli planned to behave charmingly to his devoted followers until that happened, if only to put his mother at her ease. He had been able to avoid the conversation she’d wished to have with him when he returned from his assignation with Athena. She had arranged so many entertainments for her guests, all of which required his participation, and there had been no time for private talks. But still, he had been conscious of her watching him speculatively, as though she understood his turmoil. All the time they didn’t actually discuss it, he could avoid the serious disagreement that was bound to ensue.
His mother might think she understood him, but she never could. She didn’t believe in love, only duty and responsibility. She had made that very plain, and he almost felt sorry for her.
Almost.
If he hadn’t fallen headlong for Athena, then he wouldn’t be suffering such torment now. Love goes by haps; Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps, Eli thought, borrowing Athena’s habit of quoting the great bard.
‘Right, Salter, that will suffice. Remember to find me if there’s any news.’
‘Your grace.’
Eli went down and was swallowed up by the throng of waiting guests. Men and women alike appeared to have something of import to say to him. Eli listened without absorbing a word. The ladies had outdone themselves in their efforts to shine, as if they knew this evening would be the defining moment in their respective campaigns to win his favour. Tonight Eli would have to make a decision about which lady to propose to and, although the information hadn’t been made public, everyone here appeared aware of it. There was an air of expectation about the gathering, and Eli felt himself under close scrutiny the whole time, his every word and action noticed by ambitious mothers, his own included. He longed for the dinner to be over, at which time everyone would don their masks, the rest of their guests would arrive…Athena would arrive.
At last, the ballroom was full, and he and his mother had greeted all the arriving guests personally. The musicians struck up, the dance floor began to fill, but could never be as full as Eli’s heart. There was still an hour to go before he could expect her to arrive. It felt more like a year. To ally his mother’s anxieties, Eli danced one cotillion with Lady Caroline, and a country dance with Lady Cynthia. Then he retired to the back of the ballroom, from where he would be able to see her the moment she entered. He couldn’t risk her being waylaid by any other men before she reached his side. In his current frame of mind, he would call out any other men who so much as looked at her for too long.
He sensed her presence even before he turned and saw her walking towards him, a vision in blue and silver, half of her face covered by her mask, her hips swaying to the accompaniment of softly rustling silk. Her beauty took Eli’s breath away, momentarily rooting him to the spot, too enthralled to move. This is how she should always be dressed, and would be if he could find a way to salvage himself in her eyes. He sent her a devastating smile as she reached his side and paused, clearly recognising him in spite of his plain black mask. He took her gloved hand and kissed the back of it, his eyes not once leaving her face. There was tension in the air between them as he reacted in the time-honoured fashion to the mere contact with her hand. Her eyes were enormous through the slits in the mask, her attitude guarded as she dropped
a curtsey.
‘Your grace,’ she said in a neutral tone. ‘You wished to speak with me?’
‘Yes, I…’ The musicians struck up the first waltz of the evening. It would be sheer folly to take to the floor with her, but Eli was taken over by a reckless desire to behave…well, recklessly. He had had more than enough of being sensible. ‘My dance, I believe, Mrs Defoe,’ he said, holding out his hand.
She hesitated. ‘We should not. People will notice.’
‘This is a masquerade. We are supposed to be anonymous.’
‘You believe that?’
‘Not for a minute, but I would still waltz with you.’ He caressed her with his eyes. ‘Come, sweet mysterious lady, where is your courage?’
Her eyes burned with an unfathomable emotion as a smile flirted with her lips and she placed her hand in his. He led her to the floor and swung her into his arms, leading her assuredly into the steps. He was vaguely aware of his four would-be brides, all watching from the edge of the dance with varying degrees of curiosity and annoyance. He was aware, too, of his mother’s countenance, from which she hadn’t troubled to remove a frown. He ignored them all and concentrated on his goddess, who was as light as air in his arms, her feet hardly appearing to touch the ground as they followed his lead.
‘I’m so very sorry,’ he said, conscious of other couples swirling past them and so keeping his voice to a low, gravelly whisper.
‘Are you?’
‘You bring out the worst in me, Athena. I overreacted.’
‘I didn’t think being untouched was such a very bad thing.’
He swept her into a turn. ‘It is the most precious gift a woman can bestow upon a man, but it took me by surprise. I believed you were married.’
‘Yes, I suppose you did. You must forgive me, but I’ve never found myself in such a situation before and was unsure how to react.’
‘No man has been crass enough to invite you to be his mistress,’ Eli said with a self-deprecating grin. ‘Other than me.’
To Defy a Duke: Dangerous Dukes Vol 1 Page 19