“It was no trouble. Hibret and Wosen are spending some needed time together. It’s my pleasure to help where I can,” she said, and then regarded Ahvixx. “You’ve been anxious again, haven’t you? You always pull at your hair when you’re deep in thought.” She ran her hands over his hair and down the braid. After straightening the cowlicks, she leaned over his shoulder, inspecting the parchments. Ahvixx inhaled her fragrant, floral-scented hair, closing his eyes.
“Are you all right, Ahvixx?” Thalassa asked.
“Ye—yes,” he stammered. “There’s still a lot to do.”
“You look flushed,” Nzuri said. “Mayhaps a respite will refreshen you. You’ve been working since before sunrise.”
“Just a breath of fresh air and a stretch of my legs. I think I’ve discovered something of interest.”
“Well, we’ll continue our work and look forward to hearing about your discovery.”
“Thank you, Thalassa,” he said, rising from the table. “Will you join me, Sahma?”
She smiled, leading him to the door. “Would you like to walk in the gardens?”
“There’s not enough time,” he lamented. “Come with me.”
He led her down the long corridor and then to the left and right again. Ahvixx entered a small chamber, closing the door behind them, and immediately swept her up into his arms.
“Ahvixx, what are you doing?”
“What am I doing? I’m about to kiss you,” he said, gently kissing her lips. “We haven’t had much time alone, and I miss being with you.”
“I know. I miss you, too. I’d hoped that we’d have some time to ourselves, but you’ve been so busy.” She kissed him again as he lowered her to the floor. “You weren’t in your room last night.”
“You came to my room?” He released a frustrated sigh, roughly rubbing his face. Since their arrival in Nazil, he’d barely had any time with Sahma. The three times he’d promised to meet her, his work impeded those plans. “The High Priest asked me to treat the new scrolls, and I was up half the night. I just lost track of the time, and—”
“It’s all right, Ahvixx. I know they need your help. There’s no one better at discovering that which others have missed.”
“But I need you.”
“I’m here for you, and that won’t ever change.” She rested her head on his chest, wanting to say more, but she wouldn’t forswear what they had, hoping for what might never be. He loved her as his friend, and at that moment, she decided that would be enough.
“Tonight,” he said. “Will you meet me?”
“Ahvixx, are you certain? You didn’t—”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention to the time and missed meeting you for our walk, but that won’t happen again. I promise, I won’t forget. Please.”
“Don’t you need to rest?”
“I’d rather spend time with you. Will you meet me? After evening meal, any place you choose.”
Her smile took in her entire face. “Yes, Ahvixx. Meet me near the large brazier in the gardens.”
“I’ll be there, I promise. Just wait for me, all right?”
“I will.”
As he took her hand, she paused.
“Ahvixx, you know that I only came to Nazil to be with you, don’t you? I know that Thalassa and Nzuri are depending on you, and I don’t want to distract you from your work. I do understand, truly. You need to do what you came to Nazil for, and that didn’t include pacifying dearest friends,” she said, forcing a giggle.
He nodded, holding the door for her. As he took her hand, their eyes met, and he smiled, thinking about the progression of their relationship, and their recent intimacies. It wasn’t merely when they’d made love, although that certainly occupied his thoughts. It was the many times they were in each other’s company. The way she came to him each morning, how she’d express such sincere affection, and usually when he most needed it.
He was in love with her beyond doubt or reason. Never did he want to end such a wonderful friendship, but he did desire to move beyond it.
“Ahvixx?”
“Par—pardon?”
“Where’s your mind?”
“Forgive me, did…did I miss something.”
“It doesn’t matter. You’re focused on your work, and I shouldn’t have interrupted you,” she said, pulling him down for a quick kiss before hurrying down the hall.”
“Tonight!” Ahvixx called out after her.
She twirled around and smiled, waving as she continued.
When he entered the room, more parchments were piled on the table than when he’d left. Without speaking a word, he took his seat, continuing his work.
It wasn’t until Thalassa stretched did he notice the setting sun.
“I believe it’s nearly time for evening meal,” she said, resting her hands in the small of her back. “It’s been a long day.”
“It has. Would you like me to accompany you?” Nzuri asked, helping her to stand.
“No, thank you. Jahno is just down the hall, and he’s promised me the most wonderful back rub.”
That brought a smile to all in the room. Ahvixx couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she looked. He pondered the possibilities for his life and future family. Tonight, he thought. I’ll tell Sahma that I’m in love with her and ask her to be my wife.
Nzuri’s hand on his back brought him from his contemplations.
“Mayhaps if you take some time away from the scrolls, you’ll find that which you seek. It’s there, Ahvixx. You’ll see it again with fresh eyes.”
It wasn’t his eyes that needed rest: his mind wouldn’t calm. He ran his hands over his face, following them from the chamber. Ahvixx didn’t join them for evening meal, instead, he opted for a hot bath. When he met with Sahma, he wanted to be refreshed in not only body and mind, but also appearance.
Taking his time, Ahvixx released his hair from its braid. Start at the bottom, he reminded himself, taking up the brush. For nearly half a glass, he sat grooming the long tresses until the luster returned. When he heard the voices in the corridor, he knew evening meal had ended. Although his heart urged him to the gardens, his mind stilled his movements. Ahvixx didn’t want his anxiousness to betray his purpose. He needed to organize his thoughts and strengthen his resolve. He couldn’t fail. His future with his beloved depended upon this night.
As he meditated, he thought about Sahma, about all the things that he needed to convey, and the best way of doing so. When his mind calmed, he studied his face in the mirror.
“No one is above you,” he said with a nod of confidence, rising and leaving his chamber.
His steps were hastened until he reached the final length of the corridor leading to the gardens. His smile couldn’t be contained, seeing Sahma seated on the carved bench. The light from the brazier highlighted the delicate features of her face. He noticed that her hair was pulled back on one side, allowing a complete view. Ahvixx flushed, enjoying the cyan and silver gown she wore. The low bodice accentuated her ample bust and curves, outlined in the braziers light. It reminded him of the night she came to him…the night he had to admit that he was in love with her. She was stunning, and even more so without her usual trousers and tunic. He paused again, straightening his clothes before opening the doors.
Sahma looked over at him with her always-intoxicating smile. He returned the same until seeing the person seated opposite her. Sahma rushed over, taking one of his hands while the other flittered through his free-flowing hair.
Ahvixx’s eyes were fixed on the man approaching them.
He scrutinized every inch of the intruder, gauging his demeanor and his intent. The intruder was certainly well dressed and groomed, standing strikingly tall, but Ahvixx stood taller, especially when he forced his broad shoulders back, which he certainly made sure to do. As the man advanced, Ahvixx continued his scan.
He admired the man’s fine golden doublet with intricate black embroidery up the sides. The fine cloak he wore matched hi
s doublet and trews perfectly, accentuated by his black leather boots and gloves. The jeweled buckle of his belt glinted in the firelight, casting an array of twinkling colors as he walked. Even the intruder’s shoulder length white hair was neatly groomed, partially pulled back in a braid to offer a full view of his handsome face. Too handsome, Ahvixx noted.
A pang erupted in his chest as his eyes rested on Sahma. He admired her for several moments before glancing at the man, and then down to his own meager attire, feeling out of place between the two.
“Ahvixx, I’d like to introduce you to Lord Jarin Swayne. He’s from Yarah.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Jarin said. “Though, I feel as if I’ve known you for some time. Sahma thinks highly of you indeed.”
That comment at least lifted some of the gloom Ahvixx felt.
“Yes. He’s my dearest friend,” she said, hugging his arm.
Ahvixx nearly cringed at the mention of friendship. He eyed the young lord again, finally offering a proper greeting. To his displeasure, the intruder followed them as Sahma returned to the bench. Jarin retook his seat across from her while Ahvixx sat beside. He appreciated that much, at least, although he sighed when Sahma immediately released his arm, resting her hands on her lap. He didn’t miss Jarin’s eyes linger on her bust before looking up again.
“Jarin is the Caretaker’s son, Ahvixx. Arianna is his sister, and Temian was raised as a brother to him. They’ve invited me to visit the village when they take leave. I’ve never been to Yarah, you know.”
“Leave? With him? Never would I allow such a thing!” Ahvixx wanted to shout, but he forced a smile instead.
“It would be my pleasure to have you accompany me, Lady Sahma,” Jarin said. “There are many beautiful sites in Yarah. Our gardens aren’t as grand as these, but I’m certain you’d enjoy them almost as much as I’d enjoy your company.”
“I’d love to come.”
Ahvixx’s heart raced. “Sa—Sahma, I don’t think your parents would agree to such a visit,” he said, trying to keep the obfuscating fog of romantic images between them from his mind.
“Certainly, we’d ask for permission,” Jarin said, flashing a handsome smile. “Never would I attempt to take such a lovely young maid unescorted, no matter how much her company would please me.”
Ahvixx wanted to yell out in protest. How could she permit such obvious flirtations right there in front of him? His heart sank, observing her playful expressions as the intruder spoke sweetly. He didn’t understand what had happened so suddenly. He was supposed to be for Sahma, not some overly adorned Caretaker’s son from Yarah. Ahvixx was in love with her. They were meant to be, and made love so passionately. No, Jarin couldn’t come and destroy their relationship. He wouldn’t allow it. At least, that’s what he told himself.
“Mayhaps Ahvixx could escort me,” she said, holding his hand. “My father would surely permit it if he were there to look after me.” When she leaned against his arm, Ahvixx drew her closer, staring into the intruder’s eyes.
“I’d do anything for you, Sahma, but my work with the scrolls prevents me from taking leave just now.”
“Well, mayhaps I’ll extend my visit,” Jarin said.
Ahvixx’s eyes narrowed, yet he noticed that her face brightened.
“Could you, Jarin?”
“Would you like me to stay?”
“I’d enjoy that very much. It’s quite lonely in the citadel and Ahvixx doesn’t have the time just now. Otherwise, we’d be together each moment.” She smiled, squeezing his arm. “Ahvixx’s work is very important.”
Ahvixx nearly shook with anger. Before he realized, he’d stood, pulling her to his side. To his relief, the garden’s doors opened, and one of Jarin’s guards stood in the entryway.
“Pardons, Lord Swayne, a word.”
“Forgive me. This will take but a moment.”
Ahvixx stared as the handsome intruder left. A relieved sighed passed his lips, knowing that he probably would’ve said something foolish had the interruption not prevented it. For many long moments, he said nothing, observing Sahma’s euphoric expression.
“Jarin said I’m beautiful,” she whispered, leading Ahvixx down the path.
“This pleases you?”
“Well, of course. I think any woman appreciates such comments. He’s handsome, too, but not more than you.”
Ahvixx halted, turning her to face him. “I’ve told you that you’re beautiful numerous times.”
“You have, but it’s not the same.”
The words stung. “What? Not the same?”
“I don’t mean that in a negative way, Ahvixx. It’s just that you’re my closest friend and we’ve always loved and cared for each other that way. Jarin sees me only as a woman, and that’s the difference. I love when you tell me that I’m beautiful, though I understand it’s meant in the context of friendship. When someone admires you as a woman alone, it’s quite different.” She met his eyes then, giving him the opportunity to correct her assumption.
“You are a beautiful woman.”
“And you’re a very handsome man. I’ll never hold anyone else so dear in my heart as you.” She smiled, drawing him down and whispering, “I especially treasured making love to you. It was wonderful beyond my most fantastic dreams.”
“Did you merely want to experience making love and not what comes with it?” His voice cracked.
“It wasn’t the mere act. I wanted to make love to you alone—to share your body and emotions. We’re so alike, you and I. Feeling you become a part of me was the most natural and pleasurable experience in all my life. Don’t you feel the same?”
“Of course, I do? How could you think otherwise?” Ahvixx said, considering the importance of his next words.
“Sahma, I desire to wake with you at my side each day, and hold you as we sleep each night. I love you, and not just as your friend and lover. I love you as a woman and a wife, if you’d have me. Jarin could never know or please you the way that I can, the way that I will.” That’s what he wanted to say, but the words caught in his throat.
Ahvixx took a steadying breath, attempting to steel his resolve. His courage was waning. When Sahma began walking, he followed along, frantically waging a losing battle within.
“He’s returning,” she said.
He hadn’t noticed their direction change. He hadn’t noticed much of anything except his own ineptness. The intruder advanced again, his regal cloak flowing behind his swaggering walk. Jarin smiled, and Ahvixx knew that look too well. He tried to speak, tried to slow their approach, but one foot continued to plant in front of the other with her pulling him all the while.
The intruder flipped his thick mane of white hair over his shoulder, holding out his hand to Sahma. Without the slightest hesitation, she accepted the offered hand.
“Where were we?” Jarin asked, moving back to the benches.
It was too late. He’d missed his opportunity. Ahvixx lowered his head, as his shoulders slumped in defeat. He followed the couple to the benches, looking from one to the other.
He has won, Ahvixx thought, feeling defeated in all manners of the word. He couldn’t continue, not this night. Jarin was everything that he wasn’t. There was nothing he could offer Sahma that could match what Jarin could provide. He has won.
“Pardons,” Ahvixx said. “I believe that I should return to my duties.”
Sahma stood, taking his hand. “You won’t walk with me in the gardens?”
“Lord Swayne will escort you; I’m certain. You appear to be in capable hands.” He kissed her brow. “I need to tend the scrolls. There’s something that I missed, and it has just come to me. Mayhaps on the morrow we’ll have some time.”
“If you must,” she said, solemnly. “I won’t keep you.”
Coward, Ahvixx thought. He inclined his head before quickly exiting the gardens. When he reached the doors, the sound of Sahma’s sweet giggle made him wince. He has won.
Strategy
“Will Nakaris be joining us?” Danimore asked.
“No. Not for this meeting,” Pentanimir said, continuing to examine the parchment.
Danimore peered around the room. Symeon was the only one seated that wasn’t related to him.
“Brother, Nakaris has always been loyal to our family and to his position. I don’t mean to overstep, but you said this was a meeting of importance. Shouldn’t our trusted guards be present?”
Pentanimir considered that a moment. He never questioned Nakaris’ loyalty before the war or since. Nakaris was like a brother to Danimore and proved that during the war. He’d tossed his sword aside, leaving Danimore armed before him. The same wasn’t true for his predecessor, Yannick and that memory pained him to this day. Nakaris had shown his trust and loyalty in the most profound way. However, loyalty wasn’t a consideration for his decision. Not today.
“Dani. Sir Middleton’s loyalty isn’t in question. If I doubted him, I wouldn’t have assigned him over the detail escorting my wife and son to Cazaal. For now, we are the only four needed at this meeting.”
Danimore relented, inclining his head. He needed to remind himself that Pentanimir wasn’t merely his older brother, he was his Zaxson. He needed to show the respect due his earned position.
“Have we received some verifiable information?” Temian asked.
“For now, there are only whispers,” Symeon replied. “Molag’s reach is far, and having an impact across Faélondul.”
“We feared as much,” Pentanimir said. “It could be no other way after Draizeyn and Daracus’ defeat. There’re many of their supporters who’d see us answer for it. What about Ladir?”
Symeon grinned. “He no longer limps.”
“If it’s a position on the Chosen Guard that he covets, it’ll surely be earned.” Temian smirked. “How about his wrist?”
“It will probably never have the strength it once did, but he’s a fighter of some skill. I studied his techniques, allowing him the offensive. He doesn’t stray from his training, and I won’t instruct him otherwise.”
“Good,” Pentanimir said. “I’d have him think his skill is well matched with the other Chosen. Keep him and the others in question in practice together. I don’t want them training with you, Nakaris, Temian, or Wosen. Have them learn nothing of your true skill or that which you’ve trained those in our trust.”
Seed of Scorn Page 28