Finding His Passion: A Shifter Mpreg Romance (Greycoast Pack Book 4)

by Jena Wade

  “But he hasn’t shifted?”

  I shook my head. “I don’t know if he can. He… He doesn’t seem to understand what I’m saying when I talk.” I held Byrom’s gaze. If it came down to it, I would fight for my mate. Even if he stayed in wombat form forever, I’d fight for him.

  “It might be like how Ozzy was, only in reverse,” Byrom said.

  I cocked my head to the side. “I’m sorry, Alpha, I didn’t pay very close attention last night once I got scent of Prickles.” All I knew was we got Ozzy home safe, but the details were fuzzy.

  Byrom chuckled. “Prickles?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know his name and he didn’t take too kindly to being bathed.”

  Byrom shook his head. “That’s no problem about last night. I understand you were distracted. Any one of us would have lost our minds seeing our mate the way you saw yours.”

  “Thank you for understanding, Alpha.” I bared my neck in submission. I thanked my lucky stars that I had a gracious Alpha and not some hardass who didn’t have feelings.

  “Ozzy’s fine now, but it took a minute for his wolf to return. He couldn’t feel him at all. Something the dark healer did blocked his wolf, so he couldn’t shift. He was afraid it was permanent.”

  I hitched in a breath. “You mean, the dark healer took his animal from him?” My wolf whimpered at the thought. To lose your animal would be devastating. Like dying a slow, painful death each and every moment of your life, knowing that an integral part of you was missing.

  Prickles tightened his hold on me as if sensing my distress. I lifted him higher, until his face burrowed into my neck.

  Byrom continued, “His wolf came back, but I don’t know what your wombat could have gone through. I mean, I could guess, but I think you can imagine for yourself given the state you found him in.”

  I clutched Prickles to me. “We’ll fix it. Whatever it is. We’ll find out what happened. Maybe Lissy—” I began to panic, my breath coming in heavy pants as my heart rate shot through the roof.

  “Of course,” Byrom said. “We’ll do whatever we can. I came over not just to see how you were doing, but also because we need to go back to that cabin today. Myself and a few others want to leave in the next hour. If you want to stay—”

  I shook my head. “No. You need me there.” I was a better fighter than the other Betas, and the best equipped to keep our Alpha safe if the dark healer were to return. “Darren can’t go, not after what he saw happened to Mitch. And Kade needs to be with Ozzy. I’ll go.”

  Byrom nodded. “We can have Lissy come over, maybe she can sit with Prickles.” His mouth twitched as he spoke the name.

  “I don’t know what else to call him. He gets a little prickly if you take away his food too soon, or try to wash him. It fits.”

  Byrom laughed and put a hand on my shoulder, but my wombat lifted his head and growled. Byrom jerked his hand away. I’d never seen my Alpha react like that. I almost laughed.

  “Okay, I get it. Prickles it is.”

  I held my wombat tighter. “Yeah, he’s pretty particular.”

  ***

  An hour later, Lissy arrived at my home to hang out with Prickles while I went with Byrom to check out the dark healer’s cabin.

  Once Byrom had left, I’d set Prickles down on the floor. He scrambled onto the couch near the fire and curled up into a ball. He hadn’t moved since. I put a blanket near him, and water in case he got thirsty.

  His eyes remained closed, his breathing even as he slept soundly.

  “I don’t intend on getting too close to him. I don’t want to overwhelm him,” Lissy said.

  I bit my lip, finding it hard to tear myself away from him. “Maybe it would be best if I—”

  Lissy shook her head. “You can’t take him back there. Not in this state. We don’t know for sure if he can understand you, and he may think you’re returning him to the dark healer.”

  I nodded. “You’re right. I just hate leaving him.” I hated being indecisive and unsure. It left me feeling uneasy and on edge. My wolf didn’t like it either. I didn’t have a lot of experience with the emotion, and didn’t enjoy it now.

  “I do have some medication I could give him to keep him sedated while you’re away,” Lissy suggested.

  “No.” I’d just rescued him from confinement; I wasn’t about to send him into another prison, even if it was temporary. “Even if he escapes, I’ll track him down and make sure he comes back. But we’re not tricking him into staying here or forcing him to.”

  “I understand,” she said. “Does he seem to understand you when you talk to him?”

  I shook my head, a deep sadness settled in my gut, and my shoulders slumped. What if he never shifted? Never came back to his human side?

  Lissy put a hand on my shoulder. “We’ll figure this out, Gio. First things first, get as much information from that cabin as you can. When you get back, you can stay with Prickles, okay?”

  I nodded. “Thanks, Lissy.”

  I walked over to where Prickles lay. I covered him with a blanket and rubbed a hand down his back. His fur already felt better now that he was getting regular water. I set lettuce down for him to munch on when he woke.

  “I’ll be back soon, Prickles. I promise.”

  ***

  It didn’t take long for us to get to the cabin. It remained deserted, like the dark healer hadn’t returned since we were there the night before. We worked quickly to bury the dead shifter that we’d found the previous night. The body was so mutilated we couldn’t accurately determine what it was. A wolf, most likely, but maybe a fox or a cat.

  We had a moment of silence for them and then we went inside.

  “Grab anything you can find that might be helpful to track the dark healer down,” Byrom instructed.

  “Do you think she’ll come back?” I asked. I wasn’t sure if I wanted her to or not. Was I ready to face the dark healer? I wanted to know more about her so I would be better equipped to win the fight. If I met her now, I risked losing, and I couldn’t do that to my mate.

  “I don’t know,” he said. He rummaged through the contents of the table near where the dark healer had Ozzy strapped down just thirty-six hours ago. He picked up papers and tucked them into a bag. There were vials and jars of other items on shelves along the room. We’d grab those as well. A few smelled like my mate, and I knew they contained his blood. My stomach twisted at the thought.

  We grabbed anything that might give us a clue about this dark healer and how to kill her. And maybe something to help us learn about my wombat as well.

  I stared a long time at the cage that had held my mate. It was tiny, too small for a wombat. Dried blood covered the bottom of the cage, and there were teeth and claw marks on the bars and the wall behind it. No food or water anywhere in sight.

  My blood boiled and I growled low in my chest. My ears rang as the fury built within me. How long had he lived in there? What had the dark healer wanted him for? The torment he must have felt at being trapped, caged like a beast, must have been astronomical. My Prickles didn’t deserve this, no shifter did. I’d make that dark healer pay for what she’d done. I’d rip her limb—

  Byrom gripped my bicep and shook me a little, bringing me back to myself. “We’ll find her. I promise.”

  I nodded and took a deep breath. The anger that clouded my mind reduced to embers, but still burned. Now was not the time to lose it. I’d get my chance to exact revenge on her. “Thanks, Alpha.”

  “She’ll pay for what she did to your mate, to Ozzy, and to Mitch.”

  Damn right she would. I’d make sure of it.

  Chapter Four

  Thorne

  I rolled over, my body warm and safe—safe. I was so far away and yet there, in an almost dreamlike state, one I’d been trapped in for so long. I used to be grateful for it.

  It used to be my escape as my beast took the beatings, the testing, the treatment of the dark healer and her helper. Being there but not had been a ble
ssing. Now? Now I wanted out—I wanted my mate. I wanted to be in my skin again.

  I rolled over, onto my back, and an arm reached around me. “Whoa, Prickles, you’re going to fall off the bed like that,” Gio said.

  Bed?

  I opened my eyes, and instead of being on the blanket I fell asleep on last night, I was in his bed.

  “Don’t worry Prickles, all’s good.” He rubbed my now exposed belly. “I thought it was sweet you climbed up here.” He rolled back, his face staring at the ceiling. “It’s hard for me to tell how much you understand, but then you do something like that and I know it’s going to be okay.”

  I rolled back around to face him, settling my chin on his chest. I did understand him—at least when I was present. I still didn’t have a lot of control over that; my mind wandered in and out. Or was it my humanity wandering in and out? It was so hard to tell, and in moments like this, it didn’t really matter. I was here with my mate… I was safe… I was home. And for a snippet of time, everything was going to be okay.

  “I hate to say this, but I need to get up.” He placed his hand on my head and I pushed into it, wanting him to stroke me. “Fine, but then I really do have to get up. I have a meeting with my Alpha I can’t miss. But I promise you, I’ll be back, Prickles. Although when you’re like this I wonder if I should call you Snuggles instead.”

  Prickles. I liked the sound of Prickles. It just felt right. Maybe my human name resembled it. I’d been vermin and key for so long, the tinctures so strong, my memory so weak. I wanted to be Prickles—for real. His Prickles.

  “I really need to get up now.” He scratched behind my ears and slid off the bed.

  I got up to follow him. That’s pretty much what my days consisted of—following my mate, sleeping, or if he was gone, wandering around. I hated when he was gone. I couldn’t sleep, my wombat pushing at me to get to him. I couldn’t stop him, my humanity still holding on by a thread, especially when Gio wasn’t in the room, and I couldn’t leave, even though he made sure I knew it was permitted and left a crack in the door, a door I immediately pushed shut as soon as he left.

  Climbing off the bed, I padded to the bathroom behind him, lying in a ball by the door, not wanting to invade his privacy, but also not wanting to be far from him.

  “You are allowed in,” he called as the shower started to send steam billowing my way. It was the first time he offered, and I was through the door and on the bathmat in record time. His laughter at my movement was everything to me. Laughter was a sound I only ever heard in my memories. Sometimes I thought it was a sound I’d completely made up, but it was real.

  I wasn’t going to stare at him. It wasn’t polite, but then he started singing about raindrops and I couldn’t help it. He was glorious. How could fate have sent this man to me? His patience and kindness were more than any omega could ask for, but then? Then to have him look like that, all muscle and yum?

  His head turned in my direction and I froze—caught in the act—and he broke into laughter again. “You are allowed to look, Prickles. You know that when you decide to take your skin again, I’m going to be looking aplenty.”

  I glanced down and he went back to showering, my mind focusing on what might be. I didn’t remember being in my skin. How long had it been? A year? A decade? All the days blurred together, the ones I remembered, the rest missing chunks of time I didn’t think I’d ever get back, making it more difficult.

  After making me food, he grabbed a banana and ran out the door, promising to be back as quickly as he could.

  8,102. That’s how high I counted as I paced, waiting for him to return, my wombat extra antsy today for some reason, which made me extra antsy as well.

  When he came back, I rushed to the door only to see he wasn’t alone. It was the woman, the one that was kind to me, and his friend was with them as well. I could never remember his name, the one that started with a bi, but not bicycle. Damn, I hated not really being here. Although being here and trapped all the time might be worse.

  I wandered back into the bedroom, the scene too overwhelming for my wombat, and curled up in the doorway. As much as my wombat needed to be away, I needed to be near my mate. The threshold was our compromise.

  “Lissy, he’s fine.” I wasn’t sure how much of the conversation I’d missed, but Gio’s adamance had me back to full focus. “He’s eating and sleeping well, and today he’s so much less timid. It’s like half way through the night something changed.”

  It had, and I wasn’t sure how or why, but I was determined to keep the change… keep this partial control I’d somehow managed to regain. It took all my strength to push through and take control of my wombat enough to stand up. Thank gods, he didn’t plop back down as I faded back into the headspace I occupied and walked over to Gio, sitting at his feet.

  “See. He just needs time,” my mate said.

  “If you’re sure.” She took a step closer and stopped when I scooted back. “I’m going to be away for a bit, so if you want me to look at him, now’s the time.”

  “Where are you going?” the guy whose name I couldn’t quite recall asked.

  “I’m a healer—sometimes I go do healer things.” If I couldn’t sense the truth in her words I’d have called bullshit. She was doing something healer related, but also something secret.

  “You’re just going to leave it like that, Lissy?” the man whose name I couldn’t quite place sassed.

  “I was, yes, Mr. Nosy Pants, but if you must know I’m trying to help a new pack member.” She glanced my way.

  Pack member. Not just Gio’s mate, but pack member. I got up and took a few steps closer, sitting right back down.

  “Do you think you can understand us?” Byrom glanced my way.

  Byrom! That was his name! I remembered!

  “Byrom, of course he does—I think.” Gio leaned back in his chair. “I need him to be.”

  I walked up to the man I now knew was Byrom and nodded my head. He reached down to pet me and I ran over to Gio.

  “Don’t worry mate, I’ve got you.” He held open his arms and I climbed on up, staring him in the eyes.

  Don’t you see me? I’m in here. I just can’t get out.

  “No, don’t worry, I won’t let the big bad Byrom get you.” He was sing-songing. He thought I was just my animal. And sometimes I was. If he knew—he’d help me. He’d already done more than anyone in his shoes would’ve. Who takes in a broken shifter and treats them like gold? No one. Except he did like it was a gift given to him.

  He just didn’t know what I needed, and I didn’t know how to tell him.

  “Don’t be sad, Prickles. You’re home and we’ll figure it out. The rest is all noise. Sit with me so you can be more comfortable,” He patted the couch beside him and I climbed onto it, curling up against him, my head on his lap, his arm lying gently on me.

  “He may always be like that.” Byrom’s voice cracked. He wasn’t being mean—he was heartbroken for his friend. The emotion was palpable in the room. “But if there is a way to help you, know that I’m here, my mate is here, our pack is here.”

  “We are.” Lissy stood up. “And I’m willing to do what it takes.”

  I was sure the subtle nuance of her words was lost on them. They’d have been lost on me had I not been a victim of the dark healer first hand. She was willing to use light healing, which was only an intention’s throw from dark healing.

  She was risking everything she was.

  I picked up my head, shaking it, neither of the guests noticing as they said their good-byes and went on their way.

  Gio. Gio noticed, thinking it my fear and trepidation, not my response to her words.

  “Mate, they’re gone. It’s only you and me. You’re safe. You’re home. You’re loved.”

  And just as everything started to feel perfect—like there was a chance this would all work out, I was pushed back, further away from myself than I’d been since I’d arrived.

  Chapter Five

  Gio


  As the weeks went by, I began leaving my home more and more often. It had been two months since I’d brought Prickles home, and he hadn’t shifted. And with the exception of a few times, he hadn’t indicated that he understood me or anyone who spoke to him. He seemed happy, and he put on some weight. He no longer shook with fear all of the time, and he even allowed me to bathe him without permanently scarring me. We’d made progress, just not as much as I would have liked.

  Byrom had communicated with a few other packs and we put out the feelers for any information on a missing wombat shifter. We kept it low-key because we had no way of knowing the circumstances that brought Prickles to the dark healer. What if his family had given him away? We couldn’t risk the dark healer trying to get him back.

  Our resident expert on all shifters, Sanford, a porpoise shifter who had mated into the pack a year ago, told us that he knew of only two wombat families, and they’d disappeared years ago, like they’d gone underground. Were they related to my mate?

  Prickles had to have a family out there somewhere. Was that them? Did they go into hiding when their son was kidnapped?

  The questions swirled around in my head until I was dizzy with them.

  On the darkest of days, I cursed the fates for having given me my mate, only to have him be stuck in his wombat form. On some days I wondered if it was just a cruel joke and he wasn’t a shifter at all; instead I was mated to an actual animal, and not a man. But I had never heard of such a thing actually happening.

  On the good days, which outnumbered the bad three to one, my mate and I spent a lot of time together. Cuddling, playing games, just being together. My backyard resembled a minefield of sorts, with random holes dug throughout. There was more dirt than lawn out there. And I couldn’t complain. I was happy to see my mate happy, and if digging holes all over the yard made him happy, then so be it.