“Are you going to just sit there or actually get out?” He taps the thick, leather watch on his wrist. “The clock’s ticking.”
I inch closer to the door and stick my arm out through the opening. A smile lights up my face as I wiggle my fingers. “Freedom feels so good.”
He rolls his eyes. “That might be true if you were actually out of the cage.” He reaches in, grabs my arm, and gently pulls me out.
My heart leaps giddily at the feel of his fingers on my skin, and then nearly does five hundred kickflips as my feet touch the floor outside the cage. I wiggle my toes and take a deep breath of air, which somehow tastes fresher.
“There, now you can say it.” He starts to release my arm, but I latch on to his hand with my free one.
“Just one more second please.” I suck in a breath, and then another, letting the warmth of his contact glow across my skin. “You feel so good.”
He scowls at me, but then his eyes widen as I place my hand against his chest.
“You feel so solid.” I lightly pat his chest. “Like a rock or something.”
He gives me a condescending grin. “How did you expect me to feel? All squishy and soft?”
“Actually, yes. At least, that’s how I remember humans feeling.” I tap my palm against his chest. “But you definitely aren’t smooshy.”
He bites down on his bottom lip, either out of frustration or to stop himself from grinning—it’s really hard to tell since I haven’t been around people very much. “No, I’m not. But I’m also not human, either.”
I blink up at him. “What are you, then? You never said. And you also forgot to tell me your name.”
“Who said I forgot?”
I pout. “So, you’re not going to tell me, then?”
He rolls his eyes. “Will you stop doing that?”
“Doing what?”
“That pouting thing. I know you’re doing it on purpose.”
I stick my lip out farther.
He shakes his head. Then, with his fingertip, he pushes my lower lip back into place. Little does he know that the feel of his finger against my lip makes me feel all gooey and warm inside, which only makes me want to stick out my lip again. Which is exactly what I start to do.
“Stop,” he warns, holding his finger to my lip. “And I’ll tell you my name and what I am, but that’s it. Got it?”
I bob my head up and down. He sighs again, something I’ve noticed he’s done a lot. I don’t know why.
He waits for a few ticks of the clock. I guess it’s to make absolutely certain I’m going to keep my lip in place. Then he says, “My name is Caspian, and like you, I’m a Maddening.”
Chapter 12
So not what I was expecting. Well, except for maybe the name part. Caspian sort of fits him, at least if you ask me. But him being like me …
“Wait a minute.” I cup my fingers around my arm where he touched me moments ago. “How is that possible if you touched me?” My gaze hurriedly drops to my arms then my legs, searching for anything, well, bad. But my skin is its usual pale color. “Why am I not …? Well, I’m still not a hundred percent sure what my touch is supposed to do after I change into a … What did you call it? A Maddening?”
He nods. “A Maddening is what I am and what you’ll become very soon.”
“What is a Maddening, exactly? I mean, what happens to someone when you touch them? And why didn’t it happen to me?”
He wavers. “I’m not sure I want to tell you.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m afraid you’ll get upset.”
“Aw, you don’t want to upset me,” I say, feeling oddly touched. “That’s kind of sweet.”
He rakes his fingers through his hair and shakes his head with a look of disbelief. “I’m not doing it to be sweet. I’m doing it because I’m afraid you’ll cry, and I don’t want to deal with that right now. No, scratch that. I don’t want to deal with that ever.” The disbelief in his eyes fades as his features harden. “I hate people who cry—they’re weak.”
I feel a sting of hurt, but then again … “Technically, I’m not a person, so I guess I don’t really count, right?”
He blinks then shakes his head and mutters, “Good God, you’re going to drive me nuts. I never should’ve agreed to train you.”
“Train me for what?”
He dismisses me with a wave. “You’ll learn about that later. Right now, we need to get going before he shows up.” He starts for the door, taking long, even strides.
I clumsily trip after him, my legs struggling against the foreign movement. It’s been so long since I’ve walked somewhere.
“Before who shows up?” I ask, bracing my hand on the doorframe as I reach it.
He glances over his shoulder at me. “When I told you I’d let you out, you promised you wouldn’t ask a lot of questions, yet that’s all you’ve been doing.”
“Sorry.” I chew on my bottom lip, trying to fight the urge to ask the question burning on the tip of my tongue. Ultimately, I lose. “Can you at least tell me what a Maddening is? Then I promise I’ll keep my lips shut.”
“You seriously are a pain in the ass.” He turns suddenly and closes the distance between us.
I nearly fall over from the suddenness, but he catches me by the waist and steers me backward until my back is pressed against the wall. Then he brings his hands down against the wall so my head is trapped between them. My heart thunders inside my chest, not out of fear, but from startling excitement.
“Are you sure you want to know?” he asks in a low tone, his face inching toward mine. “Once you find out, there’s no turning back.”
I wet my dry lips with my tongue, and his eyes flick in the direction of my mouth. It makes me wonder how gross my lips look, how gross I look.
“I-I want to know.” The uncertainty in my voice causes me to cringe. I hastily clear my throat and give it another go. “I want to—no, need to know. Otherwise, I’ll go crazy.”
“I’d really be careful how easily you throw the word crazy around.” He bites on his bottom lip, mulling over something. “All right, I’ll tell you. But just for the record, I tried to warn you.” He drags out a pause, as if waiting for me to chicken out, and then blows out a breath. “When a Maddening touches someone, it drives that person to the brink of insanity within a matter of seconds.”
I gulp. “And how long do they stay like that?”
His intense gaze carries mine. “Forever.”
Chapter 13
“Forever?” Shock lashes through me, powerful and potent. “But then …” Tears sting my eyes as my future opens up in front of me. “No one will ever want to be with me, won’t be able to be with me. I’ll die alone.” My teary eyes drift to my cage, my home for nearly a decade and a half, and then my gaze returns to Caspian. “Wait. How can you touch me and I don’t go crazy? I mean, I haven’t transitioned yet, so shouldn’t I be insane by now?”
“No, you’re cursed, so my powers don’t work on you,” he says, warily eyeballing the tears streaming down my cheeks. “You’re crying again.”
“I’m sorry.” I sniffle, but tears just continue to pour out of my eyes. “What do you mean by cursed? Cursed how, exactly?”
“That will be revealed in time.” His tone is tight. “For the love of God, Heartley, will you please knock off the crying? It’s not the end of the world.”
“Yes, it is,” I gripe through a sob. “I’ll never be able to touch anyone.”
“That’s not entirely true,” he reminds me. “You’ll be able to touch anyone with Maddening blood inside their veins, like me.”
A few more tears leak from my eyes, but I manage to get my sobbing under control. “Just how many of you—us—are there?”
He shrugs. “Not that many.”
I frown, my eyes bubbling with tears. “So, I’ll just be stuck with whomever I can find?”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” His lips threaten to turn into a smirk. “How can i
t be when I’m in that category? After all, you already established that you think I’m rock solid.”
“Actually, I said solid like a rock, which technically isn’t the same thing.”
“So, you’re saying you don’t think I’m rock solid?” He sounds annoyingly doubtful.
I give a nonchalant shrug. “How do I know? I only touched you once.” My fingers twitch at my sides. “Maybe if I give it another try, I’ll have a better answer.”
His brow cocks. “You want to touch me again?”
I waver, questioning what the right answer is. When I come up blank, I decide to go with the truth. “Yeah.”
He stares at me for an unnerving amount of time, to the point where I become fairly sure he’s going to say no. Then he shrugs. “Fine, if you must.”
I attempt not to get too overly eager as I reach forward and line my palm to his chest. But the instant my hand touches him, my heart starts to beat wildly. My legs begin to tremble as I run my hands over him, moving from the top of his chest to his abs. Then I trail my fingers across his collarbone, his chest, his waist, all the way to the bottom of his shirt. When I reach the top of his waistband, my knuckles graze his skin. I shiver from the connection and repeat the movement again and again …
“Heartley,” Caspian growls out, sounding pained. “I think you need to …” His words fade as I let my fingers wander underneath the waistband of his jeans.
I have no clue what I’m doing or why I’m doing it. All I know is that it feels so good, like my body is starved and finally getting a tiny taste of food for the very first time. And I want more.
My hands travel farther downward.
“I don’t even know what I’m doing.” My dazed voice sounds so foreign. “Should I stop—”
His lips abruptly come down on mine so hard I swear I’m going to have a bruise. As quickly as the kiss begins, though, he pulls back.
His eyes are wild and filled with a hunger I can’t comprehend, yet the sight of them makes my stomach twist in the strangest, most wonderful way.
“Oh my God, you’re driving me crazy, which is saying a lot,” he growls then crashes his lips against mine again.
I groan as he bites my bottom lip then parts my lips with his tongue. Never ever have I felt anything like this. The blistering heat, the crazed frenzy, the hammering of my heart, the desire blazing through me. I want more.
Crave more.
I open my mouth and reach for him, preparing to devour him the same way he’s devouring me, when my body chills, as if someone doused me with ice water. From in the house somewhere, a clock chimes twelve.
“Happy birthday to me,” I mumble, then kiss Caspian.
“I’m so sorry, Heartley,” Caspian whispers, his voice sounding so far away.
I jerk back and catch a glimpse of unfamiliar dark red eyes staring at me before pain rips through my body.
“I’m not going to give this one up so easily,” a voice hisses. “If you try to take her, I’ll come for her over and over again.”
I hear Caspian shout something, but his words echo away as everything goes black.
Chapter 14
Pain tears through my body, like vines ripping apart my flesh, as I tumble into unconsciousness. I try to clasp on to reality, but every time my fingers reach the light, the pain becomes too overwhelming. So much pain. I can barely process anything else. The slamming of fists, a boot getting kicked into my side, hitting the floor …
Red eyes … Those goddamn eyes are burning a hole through me.
Then the pain changes, shifting into something different but almost equally as painful. Needles getting jabbed into my arms, hands slamming against my chest, my stomach being torn open …
Why is this happening to me?
The pain … it hurts so bad.
Be strong. For the briefest moment, I swear I can hear Caspian’s voice through my thoughts.
Caspian, are you there?
Silence is my only answer. And pain. So much pain.
I want to pass out. I want to scream. But I don’t have much control over my body.
Tears burn my eyes as I continue to tumble into an abyss. And I wonder if I’ll ever quit falling.
Chapter 15
When I open my eyes again, I’m lying in a comfy bed with a mountain of pillows under my head and a velvet blanket pulled over me. For the wildest moment—and probably because of the pillows—I wonder if I’m in my cage and that I dreamt the whole Caspian/pain thing. But when I sit up and look around, I quickly realize the four dark red walls, black tiled floor, and dresser in the corner don’t belong to my bedroom. Plus, there are no bars surrounding me.
“Where the heck am I?” I mutter, scratching my head. “And how did I get here?”
And what about that pain I felt?
I shudder as I remember the agony, then glance down at my body, expecting my skin to be covered in wounds and nasty bruises. But I can’t find a scratch anywhere.
I glance at a mirror on the wall and take in my reflection. The last time I looked in the mirror was … well, I really can’t remember. I know it’s been several years.
The person staring back at me with wildly untamed black curls, big eyes, and full lips feels like a stranger, yet it has to be me since, when I touch my lips, the girl does, too. I’m not wearing the same clothes. Black shorts and a matching T-shirt now cover my body. I wonder who changed me. Then I wonder if I should be weirded out about it since it was probably a stranger. I don’t feel very much of anything, though, except for confusion. Lots and lots of confusion.
I try to recollect what happened, but only darkness comes to me. Well, that and red eyes. But who—or what—did they belong to?
Just as the question crosses my mind, vines with thorns map across my arms and weave up to my shoulders.
“What’s happening to me?” I mumble, my wide eyes fixed on the moving vines.
“You’re in transition.”
My head snaps up, and my eyes zone in on a gorgeous and very familiar guy leaning against a doorframe with his arms crossed and a cautious expression on his face.
“Caspian?” My hands tremble with the need to touch him, and my lips beg to be sealed to his again.
The reaction is bizarre and, considering I have no clue what’s going on, completely unwelcomed at the moment. Well, almost.
“What is going on with me?” I ask, my gaze bouncing back and forth between him and my arms.
“You’re transitioning.” He speaks slowly, as if he thinks I’m an idiot. “I already explained this to you, Heartley, back at your place.” He straightens and takes a measured step toward me. “Your curse has been put into play, and now you’re turning into a Maddening.”
Insert deflation on my part. “But I didn’t even get some normal time. Talk about a bummer.”
His brow cocks. “That’s what you’re worried about right now?”
“Sort of.” I guess that does seem a bit strange. “Okay then, here’s a better question. Why am I cursed?” My gaze flicks back and forth between him and the vines crawling across my skin. “You never did explain that part to me. And what was that thing with the red eyes? And what is this place?” I gesture at the room, my hand falling to my side as a darkness stirs inside me, mapping the same path as the vines on my flesh.
Feed.
Devour.
Break.
Feed.
Devour.
Break.
I don’t know why, but I get up and step toward him. He matches the move, reducing the space between us until he’s standing close enough for me to touch him. Then he tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear.
“Look, I’m not very good with these sorts of things,” he says. “I don’t do well with others, which is why I’ve spent so much time alone, but I promised Leader I’d train and take care of you. And after that kiss …” His gaze flits to my lips, then he blinks and looks back at me. “Anyway, I’m going to make sure you’re trained properly.”
“Trained for what?” I ask, my fingers itching to touch him.
“To become a superhero,” he replies with a shrug.
At first, I think perhaps I heard him wrong, but when he remains silent, I gape at him. “You think I can become a superhero? Wow, did I take some of your sanity away?”
He struggles not to chuckle. “No. And trust me; becoming a superhero is better than the alternative.”
“Which is?”
“Stealing minds to feed your inner hunger.” He places his hand on the center of my chest, shuts his eyes, and breathes in deeply. “I can smell the hunger all over you right now.”
My heart flutters in my chest, mainly from his touch. “And you’re not afraid of me? Afraid I’ll try to steal your mind?”
A smirk forms on his face as he opens his eyes. “You can try, but you won’t succeed.” He slips his hand up the front of me, curves it around my neck, before finally residing on my cheek. “I’m way too strong.”
“Oh.” Puzzlement weaves through me. “So, what exactly do I have to do to become a superhero? And what was the thing with the red eyes? And who cursed me? How did I get cursed?”
“Leader will explain all that to you later,” he says. I have the feeling he’s purposefully avoiding answering my questions. “He refuses to come in until I take care of you.”
“Take care of me how?”
“By feeding your craving for insanity.”
I’m about to ask him how he’ll do that when he yanks me against him. At first, I think he’s going to kiss me, but instead, he holds my body tightly against him until our chests, hips, legs—everything—is fused together.
A warmth flickers inside me, a slow burning that works into a scorching fire. The fire keeps spreading, kissing my skin until I can barely breathe. I can almost feel Caspian inside me, or his power, anyway. Hot and scorching and powerful. And strangely, sedating.
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