by J. D. Light
"No way," I said, bringing his hand to my chest, and forcing him to look into my eyes. "He apologized like the next day as soon as he woke up and remembered what he'd done. He was super drunk. I could have been a lampshade and he probably would have tried to kiss me." He'd also been pretty down about his breakup with the guy he'd been dating, who'd also been an alpha and decided he wanted to go the traditional route and find an omega to settle down with and have children.
When my best friend in the entire world gripped my hand tight and pulled it up to his mouth to kiss the knuckles, still looking far too angry to be my sweet, perfect man who was always so gentle and kind, oddly, it made me feel incredibly cared for and protected.
"Barnabi," I said anyway, needing him to hear me. "You will not mess with Boomer."
He narrowed his eyes further on mine, glowering at me. "We'll see."
"I don't want my first kiss to be Boomer or anyone else who just wants me as a replacement for someone else. When someone finally kisses me, I want it to be because they just can't go another moment without knowing what my mouth tastes like." I reached up and touched my lips with my fingertips, smiling softly. Of course, that probably meant I'd never get my first kiss, because people simply didn't look at me like that. "Have you had your first kiss, B?" I queried, once again, not sure I wanted to hear the answer to my own question.
"Nah," he said, giving me a lip curl and then a small smile. "Not that I'm counting."
Not that he's…
My stomach plummeted to the ground as my mind started trying to supply the information I didn't think I'd wanted to hear. He'd kissed someone?
"What do you mean?" I demanded, my grip tightening on his hand.
Where the hell had I been? Like he'd pointed out earlier, we spent the majority of our time together. We even worked together and spent nearly every evening at home, cooking dinner together until it was time to go to bed, and then we even ended up sleeping in each other's bed, since it was simply what we'd always done from when we were younger. It had honestly never even been an option for us not to. That was just what we did. "Who'd you kiss?"
"I didn't kiss anyone. Sage kissed me that night we gave her a ride home when I tried to walk her to her door, but I didn't kiss her back."
While relief flooded my body, so did the indignance. "She kissed you with me right there in the car? Why didn't you tell me?"
Sage was a beautiful omega female we worked with… who'd also just gotten out of a relationship. Her breakup had been almost as bad as Boomer's, but not because he'd wanted someone more suited for him. He'd told her he'd simply lost feelings for her and ghosted her completely after three years. Like literally hadn't spoken one word to her in the three weeks since he broke it off after getting up in the middle of movie night and moving toward the door like it was any other night. There hadn't even been a fight or any kind of disagreement. He'd just decided mid Shrek that he didn't want to do it anymore… so he didn't.
Barnabi shrugged, raising both eyebrows. "I told you, it didn't count. It wasn't important. I didn't want a kiss, and I didn't participate, so I don't think that counts as my first kiss."
He was right, but I suddenly understood why he'd wanted to go murder Boomer. People stealing first kisses was a big deal. Hell, people stealing kisses that didn't belong to them was a big deal. "I can't believe that bitch kissed you."
He chuckled, and I glared at him. "You're so cute when you're mad," he said, tilting his head to the side as he watched me, a soft smile on his face.
Grumbling, I got out of the car, grabbing the sweater I'd brought to wear in the bar instead of my thick jacket just in case it was chilly inside.
When we got in the house, I immediately went into the kitchen, knowing I needed to drink a big glass of water and possibly have a snack. I was just barely buzzed, but I wanted to get back to normal as quickly as possible. I hated being the only one buzzed in a room full of sober people, and there was no doubt that Barnabi was completely sober.
Had I ruined his fun? He'd told that cute blond he needed to take care of me, and even acted like we were a couple, but what if he'd just done that because he knew I probably wouldn’t go home with anyone else, since the only other person I probably would have trusted was Thunder, and I couldn't necessarily trust him either, since the guy would gladly ditch me if some girl waved her boobs in his face.
Maybe, if I hadn't been there, needing a ride home, Barnabi would be off somewhere, having his first sexual experience with a cute blond and completely forgetting I existed.
"B. Do you think sex is as fun as people say it is?" I asked, when he walked into the kitchen. I pulled a bag of chips off the top of the refrigerator, taking the clip off of the top and tossing it on the counter. "How much better could it be than with my hand? I feel like I do just fine."
He coughed and I looked up at him, finding him looking back at me with wide, surprised… tear-filled eyes… from the coughing. When he finally seemed to have everything under control, he cleared his throat, licking his lips.
"I don't know, Fowl," he said, his voice still a bit strained, like he was still fighting the spit drowning his vocal cords. "Thunder says it's way better, but he's been girl crazy since we were children, and you saw what happened. He was always dropping us to run off and fuck some girl." He stepped closer, pulling me into his arms for a hug, smashing the chips at the same time as I gave a contented sigh. "I don't know about you, but I can't imagine anything feeling good enough to ditch you for."
And suddenly, the strange anxiousness I'd been feeling all night settled, leaving me at peace as I buried my face against his chest.
"You're right," I whispered. "I'm definitely curious about sex, but there just isn't anything in this world worth not getting to spend time with you whenever I want. Maybe I'll get some toys."
He started coughing again, and I blinked, pulling back to see if he was alright, and he shook his head, giving me a smile even as he hacked it out.
"Yeah," he said finally, pulling me back against his chest and burying my face in his shoulder. "That's probably a great idea."
Chapter Two
I grunted, frowning in my still mostly asleep state at the emptiness where Fowler should be snuggled against my chest, and I tried to open my eyes, only for them to close immediately. They'd been open long enough to see that the object of my happiness was standing by the window looking out.
"What are you doing up already?" I grumbled, trying again to open my eyes, but it was a slow process and actually kinda hurt. "And why is it so damn bright outside?"
"It snowed," he whispered in awe. "It actually did what they said it was going to. It's still coming down too."
I scrambled out of bed, getting the blankets tangled around my legs a bit, but still managing to make it over to the window quickly, like somehow the snow was going to disappear if I didn't get there fast enough.
"Perfect," I whispered, a small laugh gurgling up out of my chest as I pressed up behind Fowler, resting my head on his shoulder, feeling ridiculously giddy.
"I think we might actually be snowed in."
I squeezed him a little tighter, looking around the yard and out in the street where there was absolutely no movement, not even the cardinals were moving. "Best Christmas ever."
We lived a bit out of town in a small, but cozy house with three bedrooms––one of which only actually ever got used for beds and sleeping since we'd been sharing a bed for the last seven years—and enough acreage that we couldn't see the nearest neighbor unless we went down to the end of our driveway and looked down the road a ways.
I'd always thought it would be a great place to raise children and could easily see ornery little kits and fawns running around the yard. I already had plans drawn up for a pretty elaborate treehouse for the big ugly oak tree behind the house.
I still hadn't worked out how I was going to talk Fowler into having kids with me, but the idea of having kids with anyone else honestly never occurred to me, and I was s
tarting to think about the prospect more and more.
"It's a good thing we stocked up on groceries and did our Christmas shopping already," he said, leaning his head back on my shoulder and sighing. "I honestly didn't think it would actually snow, let-alone this much. All I want to do right now is get the fire going, put on some Christmas songs and snuggle on the couch while we stare at the tree, and occasionally look out the window to watch the snow fall."
I nodded against his shoulder and then bent and scooped him off the floor, making him laugh as I marched us down the stairs and into the living room. Plopping him on the couch, I grabbed the Christmas throw off the back and bundled him up in the corner, happily going about starting the fire, cueing up the Christmas station on the TV and then making coffee.
We were probably the only people in the world excited about the prospect of being snowed in. It wasn't even like it was a necessary part of us hanging out, since we'd already planned on not leaving until Christmas was over anyway, but every time I glanced toward that window and watched the snow continue to come down, I felt a bit happier.
We still had two days until Christmas and enough groceries to last us through the New Year. Bring on the snow.
∞∞∞
The snow had stopped falling by mid-afternoon on Christmas Eve, and we both decided to venture out in our animal forms.
Fowler shifted in the house where it was warm, and I carried him outside where he kept his back turned as I stripped down on the porch and shifted in the cold.
It was fun watching him pounce in the snow, and I honked with laughter when he completely disappeared in a snow drift, but it didn't take long for my legs to start getting cold, and I knew the only way he was tolerating the cold so damn close to the ground was out of sheer will and the fact that he was determined to enjoy the white blanket.
When I couldn't take knowing that he was probably achingly cold anymore, I shifted, pulled on my boxers and jeans quickly, not even bothering with shoes or even to do up my pants and marched out into the middle of the yard to scoop his shivering form up and march him inside.
He growled and squealed a bit, but when I wrapped him in a blanket and sat in front of the fire, he settled down, eventually shifting in my lap and curling against me with a small hum of contentment, using a finger to draw on the skin of my still-bare chest.
I tried not to think about how the man I loved and wanted above all else was barely wrapped in a blanket and nothing else, snuggled up in my lap, but when he moved slightly, burrowing further against my skin, the cover fell off of his shoulder and his bare hip brushed my barely covered erection, making me close my eyes and bite down hard on my lower lip.
It wasn't even like he was showing any more skin than I was used to seeing. It was a fucking shoulder for goodness' sakes. We slept in the same bed in our boxers all the time. I knew almost every line of his body, because I had studied this beautiful man for years, but there was just something about knowing I could slide my hands inside that blanket and part the flaps to see every inch of him that made me struggle with needs I was usually pretty good at keeping in check.
"I should probably get dressed and make lunch, since you made breakfast," he whispered, burrowing closer and pressing his nose up under my chin.
I grunted in response, but that was about all I could handle in that moment. He must not have realized the hardness pressing into his hip was my dick, though I honestly didn't know how he wouldn't.
Then again, it wouldn't be the first time one of my very untimely erections had been digging into him, and I'd felt his a time or two as well, so maybe he'd put it off as just another thing that happened when you were snuggling with another guy regularly.
Though I was usually at least able to keep from pumping pheromones into the air, since it was rare that he was pressed so damn hard to my dick, and normally, I was able to get myself under control before I got to the point of having pre-cum wet my boxers.
He took a long drag from my neck, breathing in my scent, and I froze for a moment, wondering how he'd react, more than a little worried I was going to scare him off, but all he did was hum happily.
My body was heating quickly, and I was just barely keeping from rolling my hips and pressing even harder into him, especially with the way he was wiggling around every once in a while on my lap, but somehow, I managed to sit very still, keeping my eyes closed and my breathing slow and even.
He gasped a few moments later, and I locked up hard, worried I'd given myself away and possibly scared him, but all he said was lunch before scurrying toward the hall while wrestling with the blanket.
The glimpse I caught of his bare hip and the swell of the side of his ass cheek was enough to distract me at first, but as he ran past, and the breeze from the blanket swooshing hit my nose, I groaned at the scent it brought with it, and nearly came in my pants right there.
It was intoxicating, and I knew without an ounce of doubt, even though I'd genuinely never scented it before from any omega ever, that amazing aroma had been his slick.
I whimpered, falling to my back against floor, uncaring that my head banged against the hardwood. Part of me was desperate to chase after him and see about taking advantage of this mutual moment of neediness, but I knew his body had probably just been reacting to the pheromones I'd been pumping into the air around us, and if he'd wanted what I wanted, wouldn't he have stuck around instead of running off like that?
I never wanted Fowler to feel like I was pushing something on him. He was far too important in my life to push my wants on him, and he was too damn sweet to tell me no if I asked, even if it wasn't what he wanted. So, I was going to sit there and breathe through this need, until I could move without just the tug of my boxers making me shoot in my pants, and then I was going to go in that kitchen and start getting lunch ready until he joined me.
Later, when I was alone in the shower, I'd allow myself to remember everything about how we were snuggled in front of that fire and the scent of his slick and I'd handle the situation then.
Chapter Three
It was Christmas, and I was just barely hanging on to my excitement. Every year, we got each other the same thing. An ornament to add to our tree. Something that represented us as a whole or each other individually, and this year I'd gotten Barnabi one that had caught my attention the moment I saw it. I couldn't look away from the thing. I knew he had to have it.
It was a baby fawn and three little kits sleeping all snuggled together under a pine tree covered in snow, and I knew without a doubt that he'd love it.
I knew B wanted kids. I'd seen him get all soft and gooey over babies more than once, but I also knew he wasn't willing to break up what we had to run out and find an omega right then either, and though I felt terrible about it, I was relieved he wasn't quite ready to make room in his life for someone else just yet, and an ornament was the closest I would get to giving him the little ones he wanted.
Unless…
There was a faint buzzing coming from the pile of pillows in the corner, interrupting the fantasy I'd already started to spin where B and I had a half-dozen kids running around, tripping us up and making us laugh.
The buzzing stopped after a moment, and I sighed because I hadn't really wanted to get up anyway, but as soon as I relaxed back against my favorite alpha, the buzzing started all over again. Damn. Some of my favorite moments happened during the times when I was awake and Barnabi was still asleep, and I could feel his warm breath on the back of my neck and his body tucked so perfectly to mine.
Barnabi grumbled when I pulled away from him. I was sure someone was just texting to wish us a Merry Christmas, but I patted the back of his hand on my chest to soothe him before sliding it away so I could make my way across the room.
I blinked at the screen, a moment of panic hitting me hard as I saw all of the missed calls from Bonny, all within the last thirty minutes.
Fuck. Had something bad happened? What if she had gotten caught during the snowstorm and was stranded on
the side of the road, buried under a drift or something?
Though, it had stopped snowing the day before about midday, and I knew the snowplows had been out, so I was pretty sure she wouldn’t be calling about that.
Maybe it was Thunder. Had he done something truly stupid to try to impress her and ended up in the hospital? That sounded far more likely.
Quickly walking out to the hall, I called her back, and she answered immediately, sounding far too perky for someone who'd blown their friend's phone up for the last half hour.
"Bonny? Why have you called like a million times? Is everything alright?"
She huffed. "A girl can't call one of her best friends in the whole world just to wish him Merry Christmas?"
"Not that many times in a row. What did Thunder do?"
He’d either tried to kill himself or pissed her off, both of those were very likely, and since she didn't seem to be in panic mode, I was willing to bet he'd pissed her off, and she was calling me like a maniac as pay back.
"Thunder?" she snapped, scoffing. "Who the fuck said anything about Thunder?"
"Okay, if it doesn't have anything to do with Thunder, why did you call so much?"
"Because I knew you and Barnabi were having your uber-romantic Christmas stay-home thing."
I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help the chuckle that escaped. "It's not romantic. It's warm and cozy."
She scoffed rather loudly in my ear, and I pulled the phone away for a moment, wondering how she could possibly get her mouth to make that particular noise with that amount of force. I was pretty sure I'd end up spitting all over the place if I tried.
"You guys set aside time every year to just spend the days surrounding Christmas together and aren't the least bit shy about letting people know. It's romantic as shit."