Then I’m too drained to even try to get loose, and I pass out again, to return to a brief period of consciousness, then the cycle repeats once again. I know the life is leaching out of me, it’s getting harder and harder to open my eyes. Even with only the sun’s movement to guide me, I can tell hours must have passed since I last was awake. I struggle to stay alert, not knowing if this is the last time I’ll see anything at all. But this time, as I lose that battle and sink into darkness, I accept this is the end, my body’s been too abused.
Now I must be hallucinating as I hear voices, my arms feel free, and God do they hurt. But there’s a sensation as though someone’s rubbing them gently, the returning blood causing a different type of pain. It must be a hallucination, miracles don’t happen. Has Ron returned? No, I’d be waking to a nightmare in that case, not to the touch of caring hands.
If someone’s here, I want to move, to show I’m awake, but the pain threatens to pull me under again.
But no one could have come. My mind must be trying to calm me, conjure up sounds to reassure me I’m not dying alone.
“Alex, oh, Alex, darlin’. Just hang on, doll. Help’s on its way.”
That’s Dart’s voice. Now I’m certain I’m dreaming. He’s in Tucson, not here. He’ll be working at the club, wondering why I haven’t turned up to dance. One more tear squeezes from my eye as I think of lost chances. He’ll never know how inappropriate my feelings were toward him. I wanted him as more than just my boss, and more than a friend.
The voices keep talking, and the gentle touch on my arm continues. The thought I’m not alone is soothing. Maybe it’s not my imagination. Maybe there are people here for real. I’m torn between forcing open my eyes to see nothing has changed and remaining under and accepting my fate. It might be better not to know, to simply fade away, enjoying the fantasy that people have come to help. Perhaps this is how death will take me away.
Someone’s touching my face, wiping the tear from my eye. Surely that must be real? Facing disappointment head on, I make one last effort. The light is dim, but there’s a face close to mine.
A face which I recognise. He must be a vision. But if that’s what my mind’s letting me see, I don’t mind. If I’m dying, there could be a worse last sight than of his beautiful features.
I see his eyes widen, watch as he starts, and then his mouth works. “Alex?” he offers cautiously.
I swallow, but can’t manage to speak.
“Save your energy, darlin’. Help’s getting close. We’ll get you fixed up, sweetheart. Stay with us now.”
Ignoring his instruction, I try again. “H-h-h-h… how?”
“How am I here?” He interprets my blink as confirmation. “Long story, darlin’. We came to San Diego to get Thompson to give you what your entitled to. Bad fuckin’ mistake, should have stayed close to you.” I swear his eyes are glistening. “I’m so sorry, darlin’, that we didn’t get here in time. So fuckin’ sorry.”
I try to convey that it’s not his fault. Nothing’s his fault. But my mouth is so dry it’s too hard to talk.
“Rest, darlin’. Doc’s nearly here. He’ll get you sorted.”
I swallow again, trying to force out one word. Eventually, I manage it. “Tyler.”
Dart’s hand covers mine. “Don’t worry about him, Alex. He’s safe. He’s with Slick, my brother. He won’t be letting Thompson anywhere near him. We’ll look after him. I promise you that.”
Such immense relief. I trust Dart with my son—more than I ever trusted Ron. “Look… Look after him for me.” I don’t know why, but I know that he won’t abandon him.
“You’ll be with him soon, doll.”
But I feel so weak, I’m not sure I will. I want to keep listening to the voice that confirms I’m alive, but despite my desire and my effort, I drift off again.
The next time I wake there are even more voices and activity. I feel a pressure on the open wounds of my chest. Now a moan comes out as I open my mouth.
“Doc’s trying to help you, darlin’. I know it hurts.”
“Alex. I’m a doctor. I’m just covering your wounds with a sterile dressing, and then we’ll move you down to the club where I can work on them better.”
I groan again. While everything in me wants to get out of this place, I’m scared of being picked up and moved. But the doctor’s got that covered.
“I’m giving you a painkiller and a sedative. Now just relax.”
I feel a sharp stab in my arm and it all goes dark again.
I know nothing more until I wake to find I’m lying in a properly made bed, not on a bare mattress, and while I’m still in pain, it’s at least bearable.
Tyler.
I try to sit up, but there are tubes running into my arm, and the pull on the wounds on my chest send pain shooting through me.
“Hey, just lie back. You’re gonna be fine, Alex.” Dart, who I hadn’t noticed sitting on a chair by the bed, leans over me.
“I heard voices. Is she awake?” Dart mumbles a confirmation, and the new voice continues, “Doubt you remember, but I’m the doctor who’s been treating you. Doc, they call me, okay? Unimaginative for sure.”
“Tyler?” It might be rude, but it’s all I can say.
“You’ll be able to see him soon, but we thought it best to get you tidied up first. Didn’t want to worry him.”
“Dart’s right, sweetheart. Now let me check your stitches. Dart, you want to give us a moment here?”
“I’d like to stay,” Dart replies tersely.
My fingers tighten around Dart’s hand. I’m frightened to see my own wounds, but I’m even more worried about him seeing them. Who wants the man you’ve previously had erotic thoughts about seeing that you’ve been disfigured for life? “Could you wait outside, please, Dart?”
There’s a flicker of something I interpret as pity in his eyes, before he gives a slow nod of understanding and leaves. It’s then I remember he’ll have seen them before, back at the cabin. Ron had left me naked.
“Okay. You ready?”
I don’t think I’ll ever be. After a moment’s hesitation, I lie, “Yes.” At least I’m alive.
Having obtained my permission, Doc gingerly draws down the sheet and removes the bandages. I risk glancing down, and tears come to my eyes. God, I’m such a mess. Although the doctor’s obviously an expert with a needle and neat stitches have now closed the wounds and cleaned away the blood, the flesh around them is puckered, red, and angry, and clearly spelling out that hated word. Ron had certainly succeeded in what he set out to do. With letters carved into my chest and burns around my breasts, I’m about as undesirable as any woman could possibly be.
“There will be scarring, I can’t avoid that.” Doc’s only telling me what I already know. “The burns, less so. We got them treated quickly. There are creams we can use which will certainly help. It’s infection that I’m checking for. The wounds on your chest were quite deep. You lost a fair amount of blood.”
As detached as any professional, he pulls the sheet down lower. I cringe, my muscles involuntarily tightening at the memory of exactly what Ron had done. “Alex, you know what else he did?”
“Yes,” I admit, as tears leak from my eyes.
“He was sadistic, messing with your mind. He didn’t rape you, that’s one thing to be thankful for, but I’m not belittling what he did. The mental anguish of being so violated is possibly worse than any physical damage. I know it’s hard for you, but focus that there’s no real harm done, though you’ll be sore for a while. I’m assuming he didn’t use a sterilised needle, so I’m giving you a topical cream to apply. You’ll heal in time with no scarring down there.”
Except in my head. Still reeling from the awful memories, I shudder as he pulls the sheet up, but thankful at least my pussy won’t show signs of the abuse, though I doubt I’ll ever be able to forget Ron’s evil touch there.
“You’re dehydrated and, as I said, you’ve lost blood. I’m giving you a transfusion, fluids,
and antibiotics. You’ve got a catheter, so you don’t need to get out of bed for a while. I’ll be back regularly to check you out, and one of the club girls, Eva, is also a nurse. If you get hot and feverish, if you think something’s wrong, then give someone a shout. Oh, and I’ve left painkillers for you.”
“Thank you, Doc.” Though I’ve tried to hold them back, tears start streaming down my face in earnest.
I hear the door opening and closing, and then Dart’s voice. “Hey, we’ve got this. You’re going to be fine.” His hand brushes away my tears.
“You can’t say that, Dart. I’m going to be scarred for life. I won’t be dancing again.”
“Don’t talk about that!” he snaps. “It’s too soon, and all you need to do for now is concentrate on healing.”
I shake my head. “You know why he did it? He wanted to make sure everyone thinks I’m a whore. And he… he wanted to punish me for him having to be married to me. He… He wanted to make it so no man could ever want or…”
“I know what he did to you, Alex. I saw. He’s a twisted motherfucker. When I find him—”
“Dart, don’t do anything. He’s a cop.”
“Don’t worry about me, darlin’.” Whatever he was going to say, he doesn’t complete it as a knock comes at the door. He opens it, then turns to me with a grin. “You’ve got a visitor, you up for that?”
He doesn’t wait for an answer, just goes to let the person in, and the best sight I could see comes through. My son approaches me carefully, a look up to Dart to check, before cautiously extending his small hand and taking hold of mine. I curl my fingers around him, holding him tight, wanting to cuddle him but knowing it’s too soon.
“Dart’s told me you’re hurt, Momma.” Tyler sounds like he’s going to cry.
“What did I tell you?” Dart hunkers down beside him.
Tyler draws he’s shoulders back. “That Momma’s hurting and I’ve got to look after her.”
Dart’s hand squeezes his shoulder. “You gonna stay here and keep her company for a while?”
Tyler gives a nod and looks at me, his face scrunched in thought. “You want anything, Momma? I can get you some juice.”
I smile. When he doesn’t feel well, that’s what I offer him. “Water would be nice.”
“Here.” Dart passes him a bottle that’s been left on the side. “Give this to your mom. She needs anything else, you come down and get me or Eva.”
Another serious nod from my son. Watching Dart leave, it hits me how quickly a bond has formed between the two of them, which blows out of the water any connection he’d had with his father.
I use the straw that’s been thoughtfully left for me and then start to count my blessings. Ron didn’t succeed in killing me. I might be scarred, but I’m alive, and reunited with my son who I’d given up hope of ever seeing again.
I trust Dart to keep us both safe.
Chapter Sixteen
Dart…
Reluctantly I’d left the room to allow her to preserve some dignity while Doc examined her. I already know exactly what scars she carries on her body, and now I’m worrying about those she’ll hold in her head. I think I deserve a medal for holding my temper when she told me why Thompson had mutilated her. One thing’s for certain, he hasn’t succeeded in putting me off, and I make a vow to her here and now, if that’s what she wants, when she’s healed, she’ll be up on that stage one way or another. I’m certainly not accepting her resignation today.
I’ve no worries leaving her with her son, she’s in good hands. Tyler’s a great kid, perhaps his own health problems making him better able to understand hers. I’d had a long conversation with him when I explained why he had to wait before seeing her. His level of understanding and compassion surprising me for one so young. Not for the first time, I’m impressed with the boy and proud of him too.
Alex had been out of it for twenty-four hours since we brought her back to the clubhouse. Once he’d fixed her up as best he could, I’d got the rundown on her condition from Doc. My brothers who’d been at the cabin lurking close by so they could hear too. I don’t think any of us who’d seen what that bastard had done to her will ever forget the sight. As Doc said, what he’d done to her pussy wouldn’t leave visible scars, but for her to have gone through a violation like that? It will have fucked badly with her mind. I shift uncomfortably and my hand goes to my groin. No one, of whatever sex, can easily cope with any type of mutilation in that area.
Even if Tyler hadn’t appeared, I’d have to have left her. Snake’s called a meeting, and one I wish to attend, its sole purpose to discuss how to fulfil our desire to find and take the man who’d caused her such terrible suffering, and wreak out our own vengeance on the sadistic motherfucker. He left her to die. He would have succeeded if I hadn’t had the help of my brothers to find her.
I’m the last to arrive, and Snake doesn’t waste time on formalities.
“Right, let’s get this meeting started. I know we’ve got a few updates since you’ve been up with Alex. She doing okay, Dart?”
“Physically? As well as can be expected, Prez. Mentally? She’s got a fuck of a long way to go.”
“When we get our hands on Thompson, Dart, he can say goodbye to his dick.” Mouse and I can’t help but give a sideways grin toward Slick. Yup, when he was saving his old lady Ella and her sister, he’d gotten himself a reputation for removing a man’s cock. But remembering just what Alex’s husband had done to her, I couldn’t argue the punishment wouldn’t be apt.
Snake gives us an impatient look, not understanding what we found amusing, but it’s not the time to enlighten him now.
“We’ve had prospects watching both houses. We need Thompson alone to take him.”
“Any movement?”
“Give me a fuckin’ chance, Dart.” Grumbler’s tone lives up to his name. “Yeah. The cops went to the marital home yesterday. Spent a bit of time inside. Thompson wasn’t with them.”
I cock my head to the side. “Why would they go there?”
“She got anyone else who’d report her gone?” Snake raises his eyebrow as he answers my question with one of his own.
Of course! “Yeah, her sister. She’d be quick off the bat to make a report to say she’s disappeared. She’d have directed the cops straight toward Thompson.”
“Wouldn’t he have tried to come up with something to delay them?” Kink asks. “Kind of defeats his objective if she’s found too soon.”
“He took leave for a week, remember? Maybe they don’t know where he is and can’t contact him.”
“So we can assume her sister’s reported her and Tyler missing. Cops start at the logical place and search the home where she’d lived before she left for Tucson.” Token’s thinking aloud.
I frown as I think. “Celine would kick up quite a fuss, the two sisters are tight. They’d have to try something to appease her. She’d try to tell them about Thompson, and whether they want to believe her over another cop or not, he’s the obvious person. They’d have to investigate, particularly when there’s a child involved. They’ll be suspicious now that house is in a mess. All her clothes and possessions destroyed. That would raise a red flag if nothing else.”
Smoker takes a deep drag on the cigarette he’s just lit. “We can presume they’ll be pulling out all the stops to find her. You think Thompson’s staying out of sight so he can’t be questioned?”
I’m less worried about what all the cops are doing. I’m just focused on finding one. “Any sign of him at all? Has he gone back to the house he shares with his girlfriend?”
“Nah, no sign, the prospect said. And that woman, Belinda, said he’d taken the week off work, so as far as he knows, she wouldn’t be expecting him back. For some reason he’s being clever, keeping his head down.”
“What’s happened to Belinda?” I’d been too tied up with Alex to ask.
“Sent her back home after putting the fear of God into her. She opens her mouth about coming here, she’s de
ad.” Snake gives his evil grin. “I reckon I’ve convinced her.”
“But she’ll talk to Thompson. Might have already spoken to him on the phone. He’ll know of our involvement.”
“Yeah, it’s a risk. But I took her phone, so she can’t speak to him unless she knows his number by heart, and not many people nowadays remember things like that. And he’d not planned to go home for a few days.”
Lost is tugging on his beard. “What I can’t work out is why he used the cabin. He must have known it could be traced back to him.”
“It’s a fuckin’ mystery, Brother.” Slick comes in now. “On one hand, we’re saying he’s clever keeping out of sight, while on the other we’re saying he’s stupid to be using such an obvious place.”
“There’s a plan in his head we don’t know,” Snake pronounces. “The girl say anything to ya, Dart? Any reason for taking her there?”
I shake my head. It seems all he wanted to do was to hurt her.
“Got a man on the cabin in case he goes back, but there’s been no sign up to now.”
“Don’t think he ever had any intention of returning. Wouldn’t have left her so long, Prez, if he had. If he hasn’t gone back by now, all he’d be going for is to dispose of the body.”
My teeth gnash together, but my gut feel is that Lost is right. If we hadn’t found her…
Token raises his hand. “He left her to die. And he had a reason.” All eyes are now on the San Diego computer guy. “I’ve been doing some digging, found something of interest. A month or so ago, he took out life insurance for both him and his wife. A nice five-hundred-thou policy.”
“But why kill her at the cabin? That makes no fuckin’ sense.” Snips is shaking his head. “The parents would link him to it fuckin’ fast, and—”
“Hold up a minute,” I say, stopping him mid-track. “What exactly did her parents say when you spoke to them, Mouse?”
Mouse frowns and tries to remember. “That Thompson had collected the keys so that Alex could go there.” Tapping his finger to his chin, he looks deep in thought, then adds, “Thinking back, while I assumed they meant them both, maybe I’d picked it up wrong.” He pauses as though running back over the conversation in his head. “Actually, they only mentioned her. That she was going there on her own. No mention of a family vacation, just her and the boy.” He frowns. “I must have filled in the gaps wrong about them saying the boy would be with her.”
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