by Blair Grey
“So, I’m never going to get any of my things and not my money either.” Her body sagged for only a second, then she sat up straight. “Okay. A strong person can move on with nothing. I’ve got my computer degree to fall back on.”
My lips pulled up to one side as I hated to be the one to burst her bubble, but burst it had to be. “Avia Forester has a degree. Whoever you become doesn’t.”
With wide eyes, she looked at me as the toast popped out of the toaster with a loud bang. She dropped to her knees on the floor, looking like a scared rabbit. “Shit!”
“Toast. Not a gunshot.” I scooped her up, holding her as she shook. “It’s okay. No one knows you’re here. You’re safe here, Avia.”
Burying her face in my shoulder, she cried, “How can I ever learn how to be strong when I drop to the ground at the sound of toast?”
“It’s early days yet. Give yourself a break.” I wanted to kiss the top of her head so badly that it hurt but held back. I had to shield my heart from her. I couldn’t trust a thing she said when we were all over each other. When the past sprang back into her head, we were over again. It was too much to take.
Clutching my arm, she spoke with a shaky voice, “I can’t live this way, Lyle. I can’t live knowing that I’ll have to keep looking over my shoulder for Jerome’s men. How can I possibly disappear?”
“People do it all the time. Haven’t you heard of the witness protection program?” I eased my hands off her so she could stand on her own. It wasn’t easy to hold her and not want to be more than a friend to her.
“I can’t ask the police to help me.” Her body sagged as her head hung down. “I’m a murderer.”
“You are not. You killed a man in self-defense. And you were right not to call the cops, Avia. That was smart of you.” I needed to help her see how smart she was to start building her self-esteem.
“And why was that so damn smart of me?” She turned and grabbed the toast out of the toaster then spread some butter on the pieces.
Getting back to my oatmeal, I let her know why that was smart, “You would’ve been released by the cops. But you wouldn’t have gotten away from the mafia. Accident or not, they would kill you for even the accidental death of their president.” Her smile had me going on, “And whatever new identity we give you, I’ll make sure she has an extensive resume with many years of computer tech work with the company who does our computer work. It’s not a degree but it is years of experience. I think that should be almost as good.”
“Can I work for it?” she asked as she put two more slices of bread into the toaster.
There was no way she could stay this close to New York. It would mean risking her life if she stayed in Baltimore. “Avia, you have to wrap your head around the fact that you can’t stay anywhere near here. I’ve been thinking about my distant cousin who has a ranch in Montana. I seriously doubt that anyone from Jerome’s mafia would go to the rugged country of Montana. You could live on the ranch and maybe you could work from home as a computer tech or something.”
“So, you always knew you’d be sending me away?” Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears.
“Don’t cry. It would be nice to see what you look like without the red-rimmed eyes.” I chuckled.
But she just frowned and then a tear slid down her red cheek. “I’m sorry, Lyle. I can’t seem to control it.”
“I know it must be hard. But try to see this as a do-over, a fresh start. You can be anyone you want to be. And you already said that you can’t be with me. So, why would you want to stick around here anyway?” Taking a couple of bowls out of the cabinet, I filled them with steaming oatmeal, then went to get the butter that was next to her.
As I reached beside her, she put her hand on my cheek. “I don’t know why I said that. I jumped the gun. I don’t want to be without you, Lyle.”
“I don’t know if I can do this back and forth thing with you.” I took her hand, holding it against my face before pulling it away and letting it go. “No, I know I can’t do this back and forth thing with you, Avia. I’ve liked you for a very long time. And now that I’ve had you, I want more. But I respect you and I’m not going to bug you about it, the way I used to.”
“What if I bug you about it?” she asked as her green eyes shimmered. “What if I ask you to come to Montana with me? Would you at least think about it? It is your cousin who I’d be going to live with. Why not come with me? Why not stay there with me? We could build a life there without anything to remind us of our pasts. Your past is just about as black as mine is.”
“I’m an Iron Cobra. I will always be an Iron Cobra.” She had no idea about the bond I had with my brothers. “I’m not going to stay there with you. Of course, I will be the one to take you there and I’ll stay for a while. But this is my home, and these are my people.”
“And I’m just a woman from your past who can’t make up her mind if she’s going to be strong and take charge of her life and her mind or be weak and let it rule her. I get it.”
I could not stand seeing her look that way. So, I did exactly what I knew I shouldn’t do. I went to her, pulled her to me and hugged her then kissed the top of her head. “Damn it, Avia, I don’t know what we’ll do. But I can’t let you look so fucking sad a minute longer. Until you’re mentally healthy and strong the way you want to be, I’ll be with you in whatever capacity you need me to be.”
And I hope like hell this doesn’t break me.
Chapter Sixteen
Avia
Time ticked by so slowly as we waited for the call that would tell us if the Irish mob would be willing to make a call and demand ransom for Jerome Conti. And there would be no mention of me at all. It was already going to be declared that I hadn’t survived the abduction.
As soon as that was done, Avia Forester would be no more.
“You want to talk about names you might like while we wait?” Lyle asked me.
“Not really. This is pretty depressing stuff.” I’d made myself a glass of coke and rum, tired of pretending that I was strong enough to handle all this without the aid of alcohol. “Have you talked to your cousin in Montana yet?” Taking one hell of a long sip, I held onto the glass, not wanting to put it down just yet.
“No.” He shook his head. “I don’t want to ask until I know for sure that we’ll head their way.” He came to sit next to me, slipping his arm around my shoulder. “No matter what happens, you need to change your appearance. So, Brittany is coming over to do that. And she’d like to know what color you want your hair to be. And she also wants you to start looking at some hairstyles. Short ones.” He twirled a lock of my dark hair. “I’m gonna miss this.”
Chills swam through me as a sick feeling came over me. I laid my head on his shoulder. “Lyle, I can’t do this.”
“You know, you keep saying that, but you can do anything you set your mind to.” He kissed the top of my head. “You should go red. With your green eyes, you’ll be a knockout. Not that you’re not already one, but you know what I mean – you’ll stand out.”
Looking up at him, I sighed. “I think the point is for me not to stand out. How about a drab brown color and a pixie cut?”
“You’d still look great even with that.” He roughed up my hair. “How about I just get a bowl out and give you a bowl cut and I’ll pour bleach over your head and we’ll take whatever that give us?”
“Ha, ha.” I knew he was kidding. But it was odd that I’d never been able to tell that he was just joking around with me when we were younger. “I know.” I sat up, placing the glass on the coffee table in front of me. The idea that sprung up in my head excited me. “I’ve been seeing this cool silver color and the roots stay black. Since my eyebrows are already black, that would look good. And it wouldn’t stand out that much. It might even make me appear older. And the cut could be sort of a bob-cut but with long layers and,” I clapped my hands as another idea hit me, “bangs! I haven’t had bangs in years. Yes! Tell Brittany that’s what I want.”
“Silver and a bob with layers and bangs,” he said as he typed that into his cell phone. “So, what will your new name be? Gramma?”
Smacking him in the arm, I shook my head. “Something cool. Something way better than Avia.”
“I actually like your name. But we can’t have it on any of the legal paperwork that I’m getting done up for you.” He pulled me back to wrap me in his arms. “And I’m still going to call you Avia.” He waited for a beat. “You can use my last name if you’d like to.”
“Why would you want me to do that? People will think we’re related. If I end up kissing you in front of other people, they’ll think we’re into incest.” I didn’t want to take his last name anyway. I was trying my best to make strong decisions. Taking a man’s last name didn’t seem like a strong thing to do to me. “I’ve always liked those last names that could be first names too. Like Kelly or Riley or…”
Lyle was quick to out in his opinion, “Riley. I like that last name.”
“Okay, so Riley it is. Now for a first name.” I tapped my chin as I concentrated on names.
“And a middle name too. Most people have those,” he added. “Make it flow.”
“I don’t want anything too spicy – too out there – too noticeable.” It wasn’t easy choosing another name that I would have to remember when I introduced myself to people. “Amanda Joy Riley?” I asked. Then shook my head. “No, not Joy. I am anything but a joy.”
His laugh told me he thought along the same lines. “How about Amanda Renee Riley? Then your initials will be ARR. That sounds like a growl when you say it, arr.” He scratched the air as is growled.
“That is more like me, sort of growly and grumbly. I like it. So, Amanda Renee Riley with silver hair with black roots likes to dress in what style?” I tried to picture myself in different clothing styles.
“Well, I think she’d dress in tight leather pants and halter tops that accented her nice rack. But that’s just my idea of the perfect woman.” He kissed the side of my head. “You’d look hot wearing stuff like that. I’d be more than happy to foot the bill on some clothes for you. Six-inch, heeled leather boots, and regular heels too, yeah, I can see you like that now.”
I noticed the rise in his pants and laughed. “And I can see that you do indeed like that look on me.”
“Yes, I do. I do like that look on you very much. So, will you do it?” He licked his lips. “Not for me. But for you. So you can become a real badass broad – worthy of a biker like me. You’d make all the chicks down at our bar jealous. Isn’t that what every female wants? Other females to be jealous of them?”
“Not really.” I rolled my eyes. “But I think I’d like that look too. I want to be a stronger person and I’ve got to say that those women do look like the kind no one messes with.”
“Hell, yeah they’re those kinds of women. I cannot tell you what would happen to any man who hit one of the women who hang out with the Iron Cobras.” He huffed. “There wouldn’t even be a need for any of us men to handle the poor bastard who had the bad judgment and hit one of those girls. If the girl he hit didn’t pulverize him, the other girls would.”
“Brittany seems too nice to do anything like that.” I thought she had a certain frailty to her.
“Her old man was the devil himself. She’ll never truly get all the way over what he did to her, her entire life – until he met his untimely demise. But she’s still tough. Carl’s made sure of that. She can hold her own now.”
“Who taught them all how to defend themselves?” I wanted to be taught how to do that too.
“Lucas, the chaplain has the hookup with a woman who trains other women in self-defense. If you want to really become one of us, you’ll have to train with her too.” He sighed. “What am I saying? You can’t stay here.”
“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll be found out if I stay here.” I hated the fact that I had to go.
“Unless you really do look completely different when Brittany is done with the makeover.” He jumped up and walked away. “And if you eat a lot more and gain some weight, that’ll help too.”
“My stomach hasn’t really let me eat much.” It had been a long time since I’d eaten a whole meal. In the last couple of years, I’d had a hard time with my nervous stomach.
“If you had a chill lifestyle, you might be able to eat right,” he commented. “And you could work right here, from home too. We could limit your outside exposure.” He came out of the kitchen with a ham sandwich, chips, and a dill pickle along with a glass of milk. “Eat this.”
I looked at my drink. “I’m not really hungry right now.”
“Yeah, you never are. Eat it anyway. It’ll help to stretch your stomach a little and then you might actually want to eat more.” He looked at me with narrowed eyes. “Or would you really not rather stay here in Baltimore? Would it be better for you to go to Montana and you just don’t want to hurt my feelings by telling me that? Because my feelings have been hurt before and I can get over it fairly quickly.”
My chest rose as I thought about it. “I want to stay. And staying with you might be too much for both of us.”
His jaw got tight as he shoved his hands into his pockets. “Roommates then. I’ve got a second bedroom. We could be roommates first and foremost and lovers on a secondary level. I want you to stay if we can make you unrecognizable.”
His cell rang and he pulled it back out of his pocket. “It’s Carl.” He swiped the screen. “Yeah, boss?”
I couldn’t hear a thing except deep mumbling but the look on Lyle’s face told me plenty. Something was wrong. And the way he looked at me, it had to do with me. “What?” I mouthed.
“I’ll get some men and get down there. See if you can get Lucius to speed this shit up though. He’s agreed to do it, now we need him to get it done before those motherfuckers rough someone up or worse.”
I got up, pacing back and forth, not listening much to what else Lyle said as I thought about what I could do to help whatever was happening.
I have to do something. I can’t just sit here and do nothing.
Stalking away, Lyle shouted, “Your boyfriend’s pals are at the picnic asking about you, Avia. One of our prospects is there and reported it. So, I’m getting some of our guys and we’re going to shut their shit down before anyone gets hurt. You’re to stay put right here. Don’t go anywhere. Don’t even look out the fucking window.”
“McGinty said he’ll take the rap for Jerome missing?” I asked to be sure.
“Yeah, he’ll do it. But he needs to make some calls already.” He slammed out to the garage to get on his bike.
I hurried after him. “Lyle, be really careful. Those guys always have guns on them.”
“So do we, baby. So do we. But I can’t let any gunfire happen. I won’t provoke a shootout.” As he put on his helmet, he looked at me. “Let Brittany do your makeover and don’t worry about a thing. We’ve got this. You let us do what you asked for. Just don’t leave this house. Don’t make any phone calls. Don’t do a thing but get yourself looking as different as you possibly can. I’d like nothing more than to be able to keep you here.”
“I wanna help.” I wrung my hands as butterflies filled my stomach to capacity. “What can I do?”
“What I told you to. Stay here. Do your hair and shit like that. I’ve gotta jet, baby. I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He opened the garage door them walked the bike backward. The last thing I saw was the door closing, taking him out of my view.
Running to the front door, I threw it open, waving at him. Kissing my hand, I blew across it, sending the kiss to him. To my surprise, he acted like he caught it and held his fist to his heart. “He can be a real softy when he wants to be.”
Closing the door, I locked it then leaned back on it. Closing my eyes, I felt such a mix of emotions. McGinty was going to take the blame. That meant I would be off the hook. But Lyle was on his way to try to intimidate men I knew couldn’t be intimidated.
The mafia Jero
me ran was made up of cut-throat men who didn’t give two-shits about human lives. And they had contacts in many cities where the law was concerned.
If they did get arrested, they’d be out in no time at all. And then they’d be out for revenge on whoever had them arrested in the first place.
The last thing I needed was for Lyle to be on the shit-end of their revenge. But he was on his way to get all up in their faces. And I was helpless to stop it.
A knock came to the front door and I nearly jumped out of my skin. Clutching my chest, I looked out the peephole and found Brittany standing there with a bag in her hand.
Opening the door, I gestured for her to come in as I stepped back. “Brittany, come in. I’m glad you’re here. My mind is going a thousand miles a second. Do you know about the trouble at the high school football field?”
“I do know about it. My husband told me to hurry up and get over here to make sure you didn’t try to interfere.” She pointed at the barstool. “So, over there and let me begin this transformation. I love the silver hair idea that you had. With your dark roots, it’s going to look fabulous. I think you’ll look so hot.”
“Don’t mind me if I’m not that talkative. I’m just really, really worried about Lyle right now. He has no idea what sort of men Jerome worked with. They’re monsters.” I took a seat on one of the tall barstools, my body shaking, and my lips trembling.
Looking around in the kitchen, Brittany found the cabinet with the alcohol in it and poured a couple of drinks. “Let’s chill you out, shall we? See, the thing you might not be aware of is that our men as also monsters when they need to be. They can be bigger and badder than anyone they come up against. My father was the biggest monster I had ever known. Carl and his MC brothers ended him and a couple of others. I really didn’t think they’d come back from that little mission. But they did. And remarkably unscathed as well.”