Her mind is gnawing away at it, and she can't let it go, even though at times she'd love to. And she finds herself watching her mother, being wary of her, and hating it. Does Helen really listen in on all their conversations? She sits in the corner of what used to be a café and sips her tea and reads a book while the girls talk and do each other's hair or pick clothes out of the hand-me-downs of the adults who had long outgrown them. Valerie remembers when Jackie had come to these little gatherings, to the painful embarrassment her adopted sister had always felt when they couldn't figure out what to do with her hair, when every type of makeup they tried on her looked terrible. It had almost been a relief when she had joined the militia and proclaimed herself 'too old' for this sort of thing.
Jackie had seemed so sure that Helen would be quick to call her out if she tried lying, and Valerie hates that. She knows that her mother hasn't always treated Jackie well—it's why she thinks of Helen as her mother, but of Nick as their father. Maybe Jackie is just suspicious of Helen because of that. Or maybe she's right.
To be honest, Valerie hasn't been enjoying her trips into town since Dominic had disappeared. It reminds her of him too much. But when she had said she wanted to stop going, Helen's response had been more sharp words. "Don't weep for him, Valerie. He doesn't deserve your tears."
Valerie isn't going to be forgetting that any time soon, even though the days of Dominic's absence are gradually stretching into weeks.
Either way, she's both pleased and intrigued when Solomon walks in. He gives Helen a warm smile and doesn't really look in Valerie's direction. That makes sense, given that they're not supposed to have met. "I was wondering if I could have a word, Mrs. Donovan?"
"Certainly," Helen says. Her voice is brisk and unfriendly.
Solomon pulls out a chair and sits down. Valerie pretends not to be listening while she braids her friend's hair. "I was wondering if there was any way that you could talk to your husband or brother-in-law about getting some baby formula included on the next supply run. There's a mother here who's having difficulty nursing her baby."
"I can mention it to them," Helen says, making zero promises.
"It would also be helpful if we could some antibiotics," Solomon says, still calm and smiling. "I know that you keep most of those at the base in case of infected wounds, but there's a little girl with chronic ear infections who's getting very difficult to treat."
"Mm hm," Helen says.
Solomon says a few more pleasant things, praises the militia, and thanks her for her time. Then he gets up without once looking at Valerie. She's not entirely sure of what just happened—for one thing, she knows that Jackie already brought him the antibiotics—but then she realizes that Solomon was giving her the opportunity to talk to her parents about it without giving Jackie away.
She thinks about saying something on the walk home but then decides against it. Her mother clearly isn't happy about having been approached, and she's just going to shut Valerie down if she asks about it. Valerie doesn't need Jackie's opinion of her mother to tell her that. Nick is a softer target. So she waits until they get home, and she's doing her chores, peeling potatoes to go with dinner. Nick gets home before Jackie, who's on patrol.
So she feigns complete innocence, waits until Nick is in the kitchen, filling a glass with water, and says, "Oh, Mom, don't forget to talk to dad about what that doctor asked for."
Nick gives his wife a questioning look. Helen purses her lips in a somewhat sour expression and shakes her head. "I can't believe he actually accosted me in public for that instead of going through the proper channels."
"Well, maybe he wanted to make sure it got to the right person," Valerie suggests. "It seemed important."
"What was it, Helen?" Nick asks.
More annoyed now, Helen says, "Something about getting antibiotics with the next supply run."
"And formula," Valerie says helpfully. She looks at her father and says, "I guess he knows a new mother who's having trouble breastfeeding. Does that happen?"
"Sometimes, yeah," Nick says. He has a faint frown on his face. "Well, I'll talk to Leo about it. I'm not sure formula is even made anymore, but we'll see what he can find. The antibiotics ought to be easy enough. He brings those back all the time."
"Shouldn't the townspeople have everything they need?" Valerie asks. "I mean, they just fill out the request forms, right?"
"It's not always quite as simple as that, sweetheart," Nick says. "Sometimes Leo can't get everything that people need or want."
"But if we have antibiotics, why can't the doctor get them?" Valerie asks. "He said there was a sick little girl."
"Valerie, that's enough," Helen says. "Running the militia is far more complicated than you can appreciate. Your Uncle Leo knows what he's doing."
Valerie falls silent and tries not to sulk. It doesn't help that when Jackie gets home half an hour later, she can clearly tell something's up and asks her what's wrong. Helen chimes in and says, "She's being a silly little girl," and Jackie immediately drops the subject.
It isn't until much later that night when Valerie is in her bedroom that there's a quiet knock and her father comes in. Nick sits down on the edge of the bed and says to her, "Honey, I'll talk to Leo about trying to get formula. But your mother is right that things are a little more complicated than they seem."
"Dad, I'm not a child anymore," Valerie says. She puts down her book and looks him in the eye. "Tell me that Grandpa doesn't hoard supplies to keep the townspeople in need so they'll help him. Tell me that and mean it."
Nick sighs. "God, you have such a big heart," he says, reaching out and pulling Valerie against his shoulder. "I love that about you. But you have to understand that catching the supernatural creatures has to be our priority."
"No, Dad, it doesn't." Valerie pulls away. "Protecting the townspeople should be our priority. And yes, that means protecting them from the monsters. But it also means making sure that they have enough. You were the one who said to me when I was young, the only reason you ever look in your neighbor's bowl is to make sure he has enough. Not to make sure that you have more than him."
"Things got…" Nick sighs again. "If I say 'complicated,' you're going to smack me, huh?"
"Damn right I will," Valerie says. "We're supposed to be the good guys here. Remember? I get that Grandpa is all about hunting down the monsters. But are they really hurting people anymore? When was the last time there was actually an incident?"
"Well, since you ask, a few days ago, a group of wendigos killed and ate an elderly woman," Nick says.
Valerie deflates. "Oh."
Nick squeezes her shoulder. "Look, sweetheart—there are things about this war that I don't like any better than you. And I agree that we should help the people in town as much as we can. But in reality, logistically, there are only so many supplies we can get. Leo has to focus on the basics. He has to make sure he brings in enough to feed everybody."
"Couldn't he go more often?" Valerie asks hopefully.
"It's dangerous out there," Nick says. "The outside world is a war zone. In all reality, we're lucky he can get as much as he does. But I'll talk to him about the baby formula. Okay?"
Valerie nods. "Okay," she says, and lets her father draw her into a hug. "Dad?"
"Mm?"
"I miss Dominic."
Nick rubs his hand up and down her back. "I'm sorry that you lost your friend, Valerie. I really am. And I know telling you that it had to be that way doesn't help. No matter what your mother might say, you have every right to be upset, or angry."
"I just…Dominic would never hurt anyone. He never did hurt anyone. He was my friend for years."
"I know. But it's about controlling the instincts. Sooner or later, every supernatural creature loses control."
"It's not like Dominic asked to have magic."
"No, of course not. It's not like wolves ask to be wolves. But that doesn't make them any less dangerous. And we have to protect ourselves and our people.
Right?"
Valerie sighs and nods. "Right."
Nick draws her into a hug. "I know it can be hard. But you can talk to me about anything. Just remember that, okay?"
"Okay, Dad."
*~*~*
Everyone loves the water treatment plant so much that Ryan sort of wants to move out of it early just on general principle. He can tell that it's irritating Maya too, although she manages not to say anything about it. It doesn't help that their arrival at the water treatment plant coincided with a remarkable streak of luck for them. First, Mrs. Ford's death and all the spoils that had come along with their discovery. Then a warm snap that had made their nights more comfortable and signaled that winter might be on the way out. Then Kyra had saved a little boy from being hit by one of the militia vehicles, and the grateful parents had given them a basket full of cheese, bread, and preserves. Marcus finally got his solar powered battery working—after a judicious amount of help from Dominic's developing talent—with enough sunlight in a day that they actually were able to have lanterns inside at night.
They'd lived like kings for the last week—or their version of kings, which really meant like normal people. They hadn't needed to go out foraging, so they'd had time to stick around the water treatment plant and play games and tell stories. It was starting to feel like a safe place, and Ryan knows how dangerous that is. After three days, Maya had made everyone go out foraging anyway, saying that just because they had enough now was no excuse to slack off.
They've never stayed in one place more than three weeks. Ryan would never sleep in the same place twice if it was just him, but moving the pack is something of a process, so he's agreed with Maya's plan of moving every two weeks. It's been exactly two weeks since they moved into the water treatment plant. Maya has started laying out the plan of where they're going to go next, how they'll split up and what things they're going to take with them.
Predictably, the betas are dragging their feet. Watching from the rafters, Ryan can see that this is going to turn into one of those arguments. Normally they lead to Jared storming off with his chosen few. In this case it's going to be the opposite, since Jared wants to stay at the treatment plant. In fact, Jared is talking about inviting more people to stay with them—his mother, of course, but also Marcus's father and sister, Dominic's mother, and a handful of children that the witch Solomon looks out for.
"No," Maya says.
Ryan sighs.
"Maya, look around," Jared says. "We have plenty of room."
"It's not about room," Maya says. "It's about how many people we can feed, and how many people we can protect. Let's say Jackie runs through the door with a raid right behind her again. Who's going to take responsibility for half a dozen kids? You?"
"Sure," Jared says.
"And when you get your ass killed, that's going to be okay with you?"
"Well, it would solve some of our problems," Ryan remarks acerbically.
Jared flips him off. "Maya, we have an opportunity here. To make a safe haven, to band together for everyone's protection. Look at what we have here. It's warm. We have power—only a little, but we have it. We have a water source. Think about what we could do."
"What we would do is draw attention to ourselves," Maya says. "Do you seriously think the militia wouldn't notice? How fucking stupid do you think they are?"
"Even if they did, that wouldn't mean a disaster," Jared says.
Ryan watches the argument in interest. Jared has Dominic on his side this time, because Dominic thinks with a little more time, he can turn the little bit of moving water into a generator. Gabby is waffling because she wants to side with her sister, but like all of them, she's in love with the idea of a safe place, of a home. So is Spencer.
Siobhan is on Maya's side, firmly, because at heart Siobhan is a girl who looks out for herself, and she's persuaded Marcus to side with her. Marcus is hesitant, but he doesn't like the idea of promising safety to his father and his sister when there's too good a chance that everything will fall apart within a few weeks. Kyra is not taking part because she's on watch, which she was assigned when she made it clear that she doesn't care how it turns out. Kyra isn't exactly enamored of the concept of 'home' after losing her entire family.
"You only ever think of yourself!" Jared snaps at Maya.
"I think of the pack," Maya snarls at him.
Things are about to get really nasty, and Ryan is watching in somewhat amused interest, but then there's a low whistle from outside. Kyra, signaling that someone is approaching. It's not an alarm, just a warning, so it isn't the militia.
Ryan will give the betas one thing—they might argue, but when danger comes to the door, they move like a well-oiled machine. They've got the entrances and exits covered in a matter of moments. Kyra drops down through the hole in the ceiling and says in a sour tone, "Larson."
"Great." Maya heads for the door.
"You're just going to let them in?" Jared asks.
"Yes," Maya says. "Last time I didn't, they stood outside shouting taunts, and half the militia nearly found us. Start getting our things together like we talked about."
A moment later, two men walked through the door: Andrew Larson and his son Sean. Ryan sees Maya's jaw tighten, but he doesn't say anything as they stroll inside like they belong there. "Nice place you've got here, Callaghan," Andrew says, nodding sagely. "Got yourself a pretty good set up. You weren't going to keep it all to yourself, were you?"
"Actually, we were just leaving," Maya says.
Jared gives a low snarl. "You're just going to let them walk in and take it from us?"
"No," Maya says, keeping her voice even. "I'm telling the truth. We've been here two weeks and it's time for us to move. As I was saying this morning, we'll split up and meet again in three days. I'll find us some new digs in the meantime."
"Well, I hope you don't mind if we use the place, since you're not staying," Andrew says.
"Come on, Maya, they already took our warehouse!" Even Gabby sounds exasperated.
"We don't need this place," Maya says. "It's not worth the fight."
"You never think anything is worth the fight," Jared says.
Maya's jaw tightens, but she says, "If you want to stay here and fight a bunch of wendigos for a water treatment plant that we weren't going to keep anyway, be my guest. The rest of you, get the things I assigned you this morning, find your partner, and go. I'll see you in three days."
"I can't believe this," Jared says. "You know we won't find a better place than this."
"Jared, it's done," Spencer says quietly. "I wanted to stay here too, but we can't. Even if we could defend the place from the Larsons…it won't be safe, now that they know we're here." What he doesn't say but Ryan absolutely agrees with is that the Larsons will drop a tip to the militia—or at least to a human who will pass it along—to get the Callaghans evicted and hopefully killed. And even if Jared thinks Jackie could warn them in time, at least he's smart enough not to bring that up in front of the Larsons. Instead, he storms off and starts collecting his belongings.
"What's that?" Sean asks, as Marcus picks up the little generator. "Leave that, it looks cool."
"Nah, man," Marcus says, without missing a beat. "We were trying to make a bomb we could throw over the fence but we can't get the fertilizer."
"Sucks," Sean says, and lets it go. Marcus hefts the device and heads out the back door.
"So can we have our warehouse back now?" Maya asks Andrew Larson.
Andrew shrugs. "You do whatever you want, Callaghan."
Ryan jumps down from the rafters and shoulders a bag of supplies. "That warehouse had terrible lighting anyway," he drawls. "It was so passé. Shall we, Maya?"
Maya nods. She says nothing as she collects her belongings. They leave all the pillows and the blankets and about half the perishables. They couldn't eat them before they went bad anyway. Whenever they move, they only take enough to last them a couple days.
Ryan doesn't say anything until
they've left the water treatment plant and they're about to split up. Maya and Gabby will head one way and look out for each other. Ryan thinks he'll head for the library, but then remembers that Nick might go there looking for him. Forget that. "That was rather well-timed," he says.
"Yeah," Maya says. She doesn't say anything else, but Ryan knows what she's thinking, knows that if Jared had decided to stay there with some of the others, he probably would have gotten killed when the Larsons showed up. Maya shakes her head a little and says, "Take care of yourself, Ryan."
"See you in a couple days," Ryan says, and heads out into the dwindling light.
*~*~*
Snow is falling thick and fast as Jackie heads home from her patrol, erasing all evidence that spring was on its way. There were already several inches piling up, and she knows she's looking at a long night of shoveling. They only have one plow in Cold Creek, so keeping the roads clear can get difficult. She's not looking forward to it. Manual labor is nothing new, but her throat has been sore for a couple days now and she can feel whatever virus she's picked up lurking in the wings, waiting for a weakness.
On the other hand, a snowstorm is good because it's a change from routine, and any change from routine leaves Mitchell vulnerable. In his day-to-day schedule, Mitchell is a machine. Jackie has watched and waited and assessed for years now, and there are no openings. He sleeps above his office and then he's there most of the day. He makes his own food. Twice a day, he leaves the confines of his office to observe the exercises and give new assignments.
There are only a few ways that Jackie thinks she'll be able to get to Mitchell. A physical fight isn't an option. Some people might assume that an old man would be vulnerable to a well-trained, young soldier. Jackie isn't one of those people. She's seen Mitchell fight, even sparred with him a few times. Mitchell is made of iron, and his appearance gives the lie to how tough he is. In a physical fight, he would kick Jackie's ass.
There's no way to get anywhere near him with a weapon, if she could get a weapon at all. They only get their rifles at the beginning of their patrol, and they have to hand them in directly afterwards. Weapons are held in storage that has a lot more security than the supply warehouse has. She could go AWOL, presuming she could get away from her partner, but it would leave her an incredibly narrow window in which to make her move.
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