by Kaylee, Katy
“You all can take orders from that little girl, but I’m not interested.”
“Little girl? She’s older than Beth. She’s definitely more mature than you.”
“What do you want, Raven?”
“Ideally, for you to get your shit together. But if you’re not going to do that, at least don’t make everyone else’s life around you miserable.”
“Get out,” he sneered at me.
Knowing I wouldn’t fare any better than Alex, I walked out. I had my own shit to sort out.
I went to my own office and locked the door. I laid on the couch and tried to figure out what the fuck to do. Morgan was pregnant with another man’s child. Was that man in her life? Was he going to step up? One part of me wanted to use my fists to make him do what was right, but another part of me hoped he was long gone. Because, goddamnit, I wanted to step up.
But I couldn’t figure Morgan out. One minute, I thought she was into me and we could see where this thing would go. The next, she was running away and ignoring me.
A knock on my door had me sitting up. “Come in.”
Alex walked in. “You didn’t need to intervene with Ben.”
What the fuck? This was the last thing I wanted to discuss. “Next time I won’t.” I got up and went to my desk. When she was still standing there, I asked, “What?”
She shrugged. “Nothing.”
“You asked me to help, I tried. Now you’re telling me to stay out of it, Alex. It would be nice if for once people knew what the hell they wanted.”
“People?”
“Never mind. Is there anything else?”
“No.” She turned and left, leaving me wondering what was wrong with the world.
Deciding I needed coffee to help me finish the day, I headed to the breakroom. Hunter was there cursing at the coffee machine.
I stood next to him, waiting for him to make coffee or give up.
“What?” he growled. “No snarky comment.”
“I’m out of snark for today. Check back tomorrow.”
He frowned at me. “This machine was your idea, right? Maybe you can make me a cup of coffee.”
I nodded, and stepped up to the machine while he went to sit at one of the tables to wait. I brewed us both a cup and sat with him.
“Ben is fucking up,” I said.
“So, what’s new?”
“Do you think he could get violent? He and Alex get pretty heated,” I said, watching as Hunter poured a shitload of cream in his coffee.
“I guess it depends on how toasted he gets. I’ll get someone to watch him. In the meantime, Grace has been trying to encourage him to get help, but as far as I can tell, he doesn’t give a fuck about anything. Not even himself.”
I nodded. “He said as much to Alex.” We sat for a moment. The world must have been completely off its axis, because next I heard myself say, “I just found out a woman I’m into is pregnant.”
His brows rose. “It finally happened? You knocked — ”
“Fuck, no. Jesus, do any of you have any respect for me?”
He sat back and studied me. “Sure. I have plenty of respect for you, little brother.”
I rolled my eyes at the little brother comment. “Never mind.”
“Sorry.” He leaned forward again. “So, you like a woman who is pregnant with some guy’s kid. I’m guessing he’s out of the picture?”
“Yes,” I said, even though I didn’t know for sure. Everything about Morgan was an enigma. She’d been a virgin, so it was odd to think she’d start sleeping around. But initially we’d agreed to one night and I’d handled it badly, so of course she’d have moved on. But why didn’t she use a condom? I remembered I hadn’t that night in the restaurant. She hadn’t said anything. Had she been pregnant then, too?
“I think you need to decide how much you really like her. If you just want to fuck her —”
I started to argue that it wasn’t like that, but he continued. “I’m not saying that’s what it is, or that you’re incapable of love. All I’m saying is that a woman with a child needs stability. You can’t play games. We can’t know the future, of course, but if you can’t see yourself in it for the long haul, then you should let her go.”
“Is that how it was for you and Grace?”
He nodded. “It snuck up on me, but yeah. I couldn’t imagine her not being in my life.”
“Thanks.” I rose and headed back to my office. I sat at my desk, drinking my coffee and running Hunter’s words back through my brain. Could I see something long-term with Morgan? Could I be okay raising another man’s child? The answer had to be yes, because one thing I knew for sure, as certain as the sun would rise tomorrow, was that I couldn’t walk away from her.
22
Morgan — Thursday
I locked the doors to the restaurant, feeling exhausted but exhilarated. This was what I was meant to do. Was it my exact vision? No. I was willing to let the food truck idea go because Kade was right, there was more financial security in a restaurant. And more risk. But if we could keep the restaurant filled every night, we’d do great. The food still wasn’t quite what I wanted, but I was resistant to change it just yet, as what we were doing now was working.
Life was good. I was doing the work I was passionate about for once, and it was amazing to feel so strong and confident. I felt like the leader of the team. I didn’t have any trouble letting my staff know when I felt like they were falling short, and I was right there to let them know when I was happy with their work as well. For a few days, I felt tension from a few of the waitstaff and a few of the kitchen staff, but once I settled a bit into the comfort of being the boss, that had lessened. John was still a little too attentive, but I was able to fend him off as well.
It was my personal life that fell short of perfection, and I had to accept that it was partly my fault. I’d run out on Kade without an explanation. At the time, it seemed justified. When his first text came in after I’d left his place, I thought he had some nerve contacting me asking what was going on. After the next few texts, I thought he probably didn’t see any problem with his behavior. He was Kade Raven, a well-known ladies man. I was the idiot to think maybe I meant enough to him that he could be monogamous.
And then there was the baby. I needed to tell him, but I didn’t know how. The worst-case scenario was that he’d withdraw his support of the restaurant, and maybe convince Ash and his family to terminate my loan. The best scenario would be that he’d set me and the baby up in a posh apartment and visit the baby on weekends, assuming he didn’t try to take full custody. The dream, of course would be for him to tell me he loved me and wanted us both. I rolled my eyes. Get a grip, Morgan.
I pushed thoughts of Kade away, and instead focused on what was right. My work was finally right. With a smile on my face, I opened the door to my apartment and immediately my smile faltered.
“Mom?” She was on the couch, writhing in pain. I dropped my purse and went to her. “What can I get you? Where’s your medicine?”
“I’ve already taken it.”
I sat with her on the couch and pulled her into my arms. “What’s going on? Is this new?”
“I think it’s just the natural course,” she said, and rested her head on my lap.
“I’m so sorry, Mom.” I gently brushed her hair with my fingers. “I’ll get you that treatment soon, I promise.”
My mom started to cry. “I’m such a burden. You should be out having fun. Shopping with your friends. Not worried about my treatments.”
“Stop! You worked so hard to support me. Now it’s my turn. I love you, Mom.”
She lay still in my lap. “I don’t want this for you.”
“You don’t want me to have my mom?” I wondered if telling her about the baby would cheer her up or make her feel more stressed out.
“You’re twisting my words.”
“Your words are twisted. Come on, let’s get you to bed.” I helped her up, and we slowly made our way to her bedroom
. I assisted her into her nightgown and tucked her in bed. “Do you need your last pill for the night?”
She nodded. “Yes. It’s there on my nightstand.”
I gave her the pill and brought her some water. Once she drank it, I took the glass from her. “Get some rest, Mom.”
“Thank you, honey.”
I turned off her light and shut the door. I was tired, but still felt a little wound up, so I decided to take a bath. I filled the little tub with water and found some lavender body wash to use as bubble bath. Lavender was supposed to soothe and relax. I could sure use some of that in my life.
I tested the water, remembering that pregnant women were supposed to avoid hot tub level hot water. Deciding this was safe, I undressed and climbed in, scooting down until my upper body was in the water. I closed my eyes and tried to slow my breathing.
Of course, the first thing that popped into my head was Kade. There was no meditating or relaxing with images of him rattling around up there. He seemed to have given up trying to reach me, which made me sad, because until I saw that text from Jolie, everything had been perfect. The way he’d been so gentle and caring the night before, when he touched me and made my body burn for him. How in the morning, it had been the same, so slow and sweet. I hadn’t known there were different speeds and moods to sex. I wondered if there were more. What other ways could we have been together that I hadn’t experienced? He once said he’d wanted to fuck my breasts. I looked down at them bobbing in the water. I imagined his dick sliding between them. My nipples puckered and hardened. I pinched them, and felt it straight to my pussy.
Kade had to have a whole list of ways to have sex. More than the few I knew of from reading romances. Doggie style. Standing up the shower. On a table — wait, we’d done that.
I rubbed my hand over my belly. “That’s when we made you.”
As hurt as I was, I couldn’t help but miss him and want him. I closed my eyes, imagining him here. Those sexy green eyes watching me as his hands did all sorts of wicked things to my body. I imagined his tongue sliding between my pussy lips.
I let out a gasp as my body responded. I reached down between my thighs, running my finger over my clit. I imagined he was sucking it while I gently pinched it.
“Kade,” I said in a low harsh breath.
I rubbed my hard nub with my fingers, pinching my wet nipple with my other hand, bringing my blood to a boil as I imagined Kade there. Touching me. Fingering me. Licking me. Finally, he would plunge his cock inside me, filling me until he was a part of me.
“Come on my cock,” he’d growl. God, I loved it when he said that. Even if only in my fantasy, it was the fire that lit the fuse sending me writhing into pleasure.
The orgasm was nice. The aftermath highlighted that I was alone diddling myself in the tub. I felt alone and pathetic. I got out of the tub, dried off, put on my shorts and t-shirt for bed, and then climbed under the covers. I wanted to cry, but I wouldn’t allow myself. What would crying do? Would it bring Kade here? No. Would it make my mother healthy? No. Would it bring me the security I needed to care for my baby? No. So what good was crying?
I rolled over, and tried to empty my mind. I knew things would look better in the morning. Alone at night in the dark, things always looked the bleakest. What was the saying? It was always darkest before the dawn. Boy, whoever coined that was right. Right now, it was pretty dark. Worse yet, it didn’t feel like I’d ever see a dawn.
23
Kade — Thursday
I stood in the shower with one hand on the tiles, and my other one furiously stroking my cock as I imagined Morgan’s mouth sucking me off. It wasn’t one of my best moments, but it had to be done. Thoughts of her were driving me mad. Not just with lust, although at this moment it was lust. But also, I missed being around her. It was ridiculous how much I liked her being with me, cooking in my kitchen. It was only ten minutes, but it was ten minutes of perfection.
I missed seeing the excitement and wonder in her eyes as her restaurant came to life. I wasn’t sure I was ever that into my own business. Well, maybe the first restaurant that was my own. But that was a long time ago.
“Suck it harder baby,” I gasped as I felt the pressure build in my balls. My hand flew up and down my wet cock. Fuck, that had been the other thing. Sliding inside her body bare, no barrier, was like heaven. She’d been slick and hot and tight, and it was so fucking awesome. I growled as my orgasm burst out, my cum spraying the tile wall.
I released my cock, placing my hand on the tile wall next to the other one. This crazy yearning had to end.
I rinsed off and climbed into bed, and I remembered what sent me to the shower in the first place. Her scent was still in my bed. How pathetic was I that I’d stopped my housekeeper from taking the sheets to be cleaned?
I pulled the pillow Morgan had used next to me, inhaling the sweet lavender vanilla scent. I was going to make a scone with lavender vanilla and call it the Morgan scone. Yep, I’d dived head first into sappyville. My brothers would have a field day if they knew.
But it wasn’t just Morgan I had to think about. She was going to have a baby. She was a strong capable woman, but Ash was right, she’d need help. Running a restaurant required long hours, usually at night. I could hire her a nanny, but I couldn’t imagine Morgan deferring her baby’s care to a third person. Nope, she was the type to strap her baby on her back while expediting the orders. Or maybe she’d work the front for once, letting her customers see her precious child. That might be a little casual and folksy for the type of diner the place attracted. I remembered how she’d originally wanted a place more oriented to families. Maybe I should have helped her with that.
Fuck, I wanted to help her with it all — her dream. Her happiness. Her baby. The question was, would she want me?
The next night, I couldn’t stay away another moment. It was Friday night, so the place should be packed, but I went anyway. She was expediting again, and John was right, she was commanding, but that didn’t mean she and the kitchen crew weren’t feeling the effects of a crowded restaurant.
“A bunch of them walked in together,” John told me as I watched Morgan from the corner of the kitchen. “We do have a couple of complaints about the wait. She does great when the flow is steady, but not when we’re swamped. When we’re slammed, she struggles. Another chef might help. I know one that I’ve worked with in the past.”
I considered his words, trying to focus on the professional part of the conversation and not on the one where I ask him if he fucked Morgan and knocked her up. In considering his words, I had to wonder if Morgan was doing more than she was ready to do. Plus, she was pregnant. I remembered Sara at the beginning of her pregnancy. She was exhausted. Fuck. I should have Morgan lay down and rest, not multitask like a maniac to call out orders, pretty up the plates, and send them out.
“Mr. Raven?”
I turned, and saw a local food critic. I hoped he wasn’t one of the complainers John mentioned.
“I’ll handle this,” John said.
I was about to let him, but then shook my head. “No. Let me.”
“Lyle, how are you?” I said, walking toward him. “Do you have a table?”
“Yes, over in the corner.”
“Can I bring you a drink?” I said. Nothing like comped booze to help improve a review.
“I’m good. I did want a chance to talk to you though.”
“I’m happy to.” I walked with him back to the table and sat.
“Is this a Raven establishment?” Lyle asked pulling out his notebook. He’d already eaten, and I frowned that his dishes were still on the table.
I raised a hand to get John’s attention and pointed to the dishes. To his credit, he came over instead of sending a waiter.
“Let me get those for you,” he said taking the dishes.
“To answer your question, not exactly. Raven Industries has just started a new program to fund small businesses run by women. This is our first project. What do yo
u think?”
“The food is quite unique. It seems to want to be a fusion, but doesn’t quite hit the mark.”
Fuck. That wasn’t good. “Actually, it was my suggestion that she keep things more traditional.”
“Hmmm,” he made another notation in his notebook. “The service was a little slow.”
I nodded and considered making an excuse, but I decided if I had to make excuses that would make Morgan look unprepared. “I’ll let the owner know. Any other feedback I can help her on?”
His eyes narrowed like he was surprised by my response. I was usually more aggressive in defending my restaurants, but this wasn’t mine, no matter how much I wanted to make it a success with Morgan.
We continued to chat for another fifteen minutes. When he left, I went back to the kitchen to check on Morgan.
The chef and his team were still working, but Morgan was standing with her head down wiping her brow. John was standing in front of her. He put his hand on her cheek.
“It’s okay. We all get a little flustered. We were slammed.”
At least that’s what I thought he said. I couldn’t be sure, because white hot rage was clanging in my ears at seeing him touch her.
“Morgan.” My voice was sharper than I’d have wanted, but seriously, it was probably lucky I wasn’t pummeling him to a pulp.
He jumped back from her. “She just needed some support.”
“You expedite,” I said to him.
“I can — ”
“You and I need to talk,” I interrupted her.
“Who’ll manage the front?” John asked.
“You!” I called over to one of the waiters. “Is this your first restaurant job?”
“No, sir,” the young man said.
“Good. You’re managing the front until close. Can you do that?”
“Yes, absolutely Mr. Raven.”
“What about his tables?” John asked.
“I can do it,” the waiter said.
“Let’s go to your office,” I said to Morgan.
She looked a little worried and annoyed, but followed me. When she was in her office, she took a seat at her desk. I closed and locked the door.