“What did they do?”
“Well, it was an easy thing to get me away from Wighton Hall. My mother and I lived in the Lodge, and we had very little to do with my father’s nephew and his family. They lived in the main hall, you see, and we so very rarely went over there. So, when my mother declared that we were taking an extended trip to the North country, there was nobody, in particular, to think anything of it, let alone be suspicious.”
“And did you go to the North country?”
“No, we did not,” she said and shook her head bitterly. “We went to Hertfordshire.”
“Good heavens, where?”
“We stayed on the very edge of Horley, no less. We were in a little house, just my mother and I, a place that your grandmother had rented for us. We stayed there throughout my confinement, and I was never once allowed to leave it until after I had given birth.” Esme paused for a moment to compose herself. “Elizabeth Jeffries was a regular visitor, and I always dreaded it. When she and my mother were together, they seemed to encourage each other in their cruelty. The things they said and the names they called me I cannot repeat; it was so foul and unfair. Neither one of them understood what it was to truly love another human being. Even if the circumstances were not perfect, it was still love.”
“I know.” Georgina tenderly laid a hand on Esme’s shoulder as she stood behind her.
“And then my child was born. Oh, Georgina, he was the most perfect little boy. He was chubby, and he had the sweetest face, like a little angel. Oh, and he was noisy. He wriggled and made noises all day long.”
“Oh, how lovely. How long did you have with him?”
“But three days, Georgina. When it came to the third day, my mother said that she supposed that the child would live, and she seemed most disappointed by it. But since he had lived, she had determined it was time to put their plan into action.”
“And so, he was sent to my grandmother, to be used by her as a servant at Ashdown Manor?”
“You know the rest?”
“Only that Sammy was brought to us as a baby. I do not remember it, for I was not yet born at that stage, but I have lately discovered it.”
“And you remember Sammy? When you were growing up, you remember him?”
“Oh yes, oh yes I do,” Georgina said as the first of her own tears began to fall.
“I was taken back to Wighton Hall, and I am bound to tell you that I was a broken woman. My mother declared that I would never see Samuel again, and I would simply have to forget him. She talked of marrying me away to various gentlemen, none of whom I had a single interest in. I did not even have an interest in living anymore, not without my child. I beseeched her to let me see him, to let me go to Hertfordshire and at least look at him from time to time. But she denied me, almost keeping me a prisoner in the Lodge for several years. But the pain did not ease, not for a moment. It simply grew and grew as every day passed.”
“But you did come to Hertfordshire in the end, did you not?”
“I had spent a good deal of time acquiescing to my mother’s wants and wishes, and in the end, she saw no harm in leaving me to go into town now and again to purchase fabric and other such things. I planned it meticulously, travelling post-chaise from Cornwall to Hertfordshire. It was a terribly long and hard journey, but I did not mind. I was so sure that I would see my boy at the end of it. He would have been eight years old by then, but I knew that I would know his face the minute I set eyes on him.”
“And did you see him? When you came to Ashdown that day, did you see his face?”
“No, your own parents seemed to have no idea who I was. Your father asked me to leave, but I paced the lawn, waiting for any sign of my boy. And then, before I knew it, Elizabeth appeared. She gripped my arm so tightly, and I was so exhausted from my journey that I had no strength with which to fight her. She walked me right off your estate and back into town, putting me on the next mail carriage out of Hertfordshire. She told me never to return or she would tell my mother everything, and I would be all the sorrier for it.”
“I can quite believe that.”
“I had no doubt that she would tell my mother anyway, for Elizabeth Jeffries felt nothing for me. And so, I decided to find the Duke, to tell him everything and to beg that he rescue our boy from a lifetime of servitude even if I, his own mother, could not save him.”
“So you went straight to him? You went to Devonshire?”
“I did, I went to Calder Hall and found him walking on the grounds. The moment he saw me, his eyes lit up, and I fell into his arms. I still loved him you see; I love him even now. None of it was his fault, nor mine. We had simply fallen in love, two wounded people who needed comfort in this world.”
“And so, you told him everything?”
“I did, I told him every bit of it, and I told him where our son could be found.”
“And he determined to rescue him.”
“My goodness, but he was furious. I truly believe that had my mother been in his presence he would have struck her he was so angry.”
“But what happened next? How was it you came to be here?”
“When I told my mother that the Duke was going to find our son and release him from servitude, she was furious. She made her way directly to Devon to see him and threatened him that she would tell the whole county that he had an illegitimate son, and she would see to it that his ailing wife would be the first to know of it.”
“Oh, what a dreadful thing.”
“She would not even allow him to rescue Samuel and place him somewhere secret, somewhere better. She wanted to punish me, and she wanted to do so by making my child suffer his whole life.”
“Did she force you into this place?”
“She realized that I had become a liability to her. She wanted me out of the way, for she knew that the whole county would turn against her if they found out what she had done to her own grandchild.” Esme dabbed her face with a handkerchief. “When Elizabeth Jeffries came to visit us so soon afterward, I should have realized that something was wrong. She did not go to the main hall at all, and I began to realize that none of my other relatives knew that she was there. And then they took me out for the day, telling me that they had decided we would talk to the Duke together and work out what could be done for Samuel. I cannot tell you what a relief it was to me, how my heart had sung on that morning.”
“But they did not take you to Calder Hall, did they?”
“No, they brought me here to Ainsley. I remember the carriage ride so clearly, how I had no idea that those were my very last moments of freedom on this earth. We had come to Devonshire, you see, and so I believed that we were going to Calder Hall. Had I realized I was to be incarcerated for the rest of my life, I would have thrown myself out of that carriage to my death.”
“But you need not stay here forever. Not if there is someone in this world to care for you.”
“But there is no one, my dear. I could never go back to Cornwall. I know my mother is ailing, but I never want to set eyes on her evil face again. And as for my relations, I do not know them, and I do not trust them. My boy is lost to me, a servant whom I do not have the means to help and who would never forgive me for what has happened. I have nobody, and it has been many years since I came to that conclusion. I am not entirely discontent here, Georgina. I am resigned to live out my life here and die here, and I shall be glad of it when it comes. I can only hope that I shall one day find my boy in heaven, and that he will forgive me.”
“I do not think you need wait that long.”
“What do you mean? Is he still with you? Does he still work at Ashdown Manor? But surely he would never forgive me.”
“No, Sammy is not in Hertfordshire anymore. The Duke really did rescue him.”
“What do you mean?”
“Shortly after my grandmother died, he had Sammy taken from Ashdown Manor in the middle of the night. He kept him safe with his attorney for a little while until the Duchess finally died, and he coul
d bring him home. The county believed him to be the invalid child of the Duke and Duchess whose health had happily been restored shortly after his mother had departed this world. He educated him and cared for him, and now he is the Duke of Calder.”
“My boy? My boy is saved?”
“He is, although I am very sorry to tell you that your old love passed away some months ago.”
“My boy. My darling baby boy,” Esme said and dissolved into tears once more.
Chapter 32
“You seem very nervous, Sammy,” Georgina said when they drew up outside the county asylum. “But it really is not so very bad on the inside.”
“It is not that, Georgie. I still cannot believe that I am about to meet my mother. I still can hardly believe the tale of my own origins.”
“Neither can I, but it is all true, Sammy.” Georgina reached out and took his hand, and they sat in the carriage in silence for some minutes before Emerson Lockhart was finally ready to make his way inside and meet his mother for the first time since he had been a tiny baby.
Dr Ellis greeted him warmly and without any of the sycophantic reverence that he ordinarily had to put up with.
In no time at all, they were speeding along the same corridor that Georgina had walked just days before. And what a time it had been, so full of surprise and unbelievable events that she could hardly tell in a straight line when she and Jeremy had made their way back to Calder Hall.
“Well, are you ready?” Georgina said when he finally reached the door to Esme Montgomery’s chamber.
“Yes, I am ready.”
Dr Ellis walked in first and hurriedly told Esme that she had visitors again. This time, Esme turned around immediately, pleased to have visitors and clearly expecting Georgina. She smiled warmly when she recognized her and then looked to the young man at her side.
Her recognition of her son was immediate and just about the most heartwarming and heartbreaking thing that Georgina had ever witnessed.
“My boy,” Esme said and took a step towards him before her legs gave way a little, and she stumbled.
In a heartbeat, Emerson had darted forward and caught her in his arms, holding her tightly to him and looking for all the world as if he would never let her go.
“Mama,” he said simply, his deep voice breaking and giving away his emotions.
Dr Jeffries had left them, and Georgina could not help thinking that she ought to do the same. But she could not turn away; she was rooted to the spot with tears rolling down her cheeks.
“My dear boy, can you ever forgive me?” Esme said, her voice full of pain and happiness all at once.
“There is nothing to forgive, Mama. We were torn apart by others, by two of the most scheming, rotten women in the world. Neither one of us could have fought against them, but we have won in the end, have we not? We have found one another again, and I can assure you that we shall never be parted.”
“My dear Samuel, that you would be so kind as to visit me here in this place.”
“I have no need to visit you here, Mama, for you are not to spend another night under this roof. You are coming home with me this very day. You are coming home to Calder Hall to live in the home of the man you once loved so much.”
“My goodness, I could never have foreseen this day. My dear boy, you must let me sit down for a moment, for I am overcome.”
As Emerson walked his mother over to her little chair and crouched down at her side, Georgina openly cried.
After Emerson and Georgina had spoken with an overjoyed Dr Ellis and told him of their intentions, they made their way back unescorted through the corridor which led to Esme’s room. Emerson reached out and held her hand as they walked, gripping it firmly.
“And how do you feel now, Sammy?” she said gently as they walked.
“I feel as if I exist, Georgie. I feel it so much, so strongly, that I curiously realize I existed all along.”
“In a curious way, Sammy, that makes sense,” Georgina said and laughed.
“I had thought that it was the most important thing in the world to know that I truly have a place, that I am secure in my title and my lands. And I had wanted that so that I could know deep in my heart that I was good enough for you.”
“You have always been good enough for me, Sammy,” Georgina said and felt her eyes welling with tears as he stopped her and turned her to face him.
“I think I knew that all along, and it was only my own insecurity that needed assuaging. But now that I know that I truly was the son of the Duke and that my mother was the beautiful Lady Esme Montgomery, I realize that their standing and mine never truly mattered. I know who I am now, and everything is different. Even if I had discovered that I was an orphan boy who the Duke had fashioned as a false heir, still I would have been content. Just knowing who my parents are is enough. It really is the very thing that I was searching for, and now I have it.”
“I am so very happy to hear you say that, Sammy. And I am so happy that you know in your heart that you have always been good enough for me.”
“Can you forgive me for behaving in such a contrary fashion, kissing you one moment and then holding you at arm’s length in the next?”
“Of course I can. You have been through so much in this life, and I wish that things had been different. If only our grandmothers had not been so wicked, surely something good could have been done. They were so very fine at concocting stories, untruths, so why could they not have used that dubious talent for good and not evil? They could have found some way, I am sure, to keep you and your mother together at least.”
“But then I would never have known you, would I? If I had never been a servant boy at Ashdown Manor, I would not know you now, Georgie. As curious as it sounds, perhaps some things happen for a reason, even if they are so painful.”
“I cannot imagine my life without you,” Georgina said, and her voice cracked.
“Oh Georgie, I love you so much. I fell in love with you the moment I saw you again in the grounds of Calder on the day of the garden party. Goodness, it seems like so long ago now, and yet it is only a few short months.”
“Yes, but our history spans many years, and I think we have both always felt that immediate closeness.”
“And do you love me too, Georgie? Do you love me as I love you?”
“I love you so much I cannot put it into words, and I can tell you with certainty that I would never be able to love another as I love you.”
Epilogue
“My dear Georgie, that daughter of yours is a most determined little thing, is she not?” Esme Montgomery said as she walked into the drawing room.
“She quite wears me out, Esme,” Georgina said with a laugh and laid her hand on her round belly.
“Perhaps you will have a boy next time.” Esme laughed. “I wonder if boys are perhaps not a little more placid than girls in the beginning.”
“I thank heavens for the nurse, in all honesty,” Georgina said. “For baby Esme has a very strong will indeed.”
“Just like her mother.” Esme, as pale and beautiful as ever, sat on the couch next to her daughter-in-law and took her hand in her own.
“And just like her grandmother,” Georgina said, squeezing Esme’s hand tightly. “And I can only hope that she will have the beauty and fortitude to match.”
“You are too kind, my dear, but I shall accept your compliment for it was so prettily given.”
“And there shall be many more to follow in this happy life of ours.”
Esme had come on in leaps and bounds since she had come to live at Calder Hall. She was still quiet and delicate, but the deep and abiding melancholy had evaporated entirely.
“You do not regret bringing me here from Ainsley? You do not wish that you and Samuel could have started your married life unencumbered?”
“Not for a moment, Esme,” Georgina said genuinely. “These last two years have been the happiest of my life. Finding Sammy after so long, after so many years of wondering what had becom
e of him, and then helping him to find you; goodness, I could never have imagined my life to be so crowded with incident.”
“No indeed, and I truly believe that had it not been for you, my dear, I would never have set eyes on my baby son again.”
“Well, you are here now, the two of you reunited and happy, and I could not be more content, I assure you.”
“I thought I would find the two of you in here,” Emerson Lockhart said as he strode into the drawing room.
He had become very used to being Emerson Lockhart to everybody else in the world and simply Sammy to his wife and mother. He had a place now, a true identity, and if it came with two names, then so be it.
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