by Kyle West
“Come eat with Samuel and me tomorrow morning. I’m sure Sam has a lot to tell you about his plans for the senate.”
Anna gave a weak nod. “I’ll do that.” Anna sighed. “You don’t have to stay, Ruth. I know I’m a mess, but I’ll manage. I’ll go to sleep, and tomorrow will be a new day.”
“It will be for all of us.”
They both stood and hugged, and when they parted, Ruth spoke. “We’re always here for you, Anna. Never forget that.”
“I won’t,” Anna said. “I could never.”
Anna walked Ruth to the door, shutting it behind her as she left.
Anna walked to the crib, looking down at her son, sleeping on his back with each of his tiny hands curled. Another tear came, which she wiped away. Maybe Alex was gone, but in a way, he wasn’t. He was laying down right in front of her. Alex would always be with her.
Anna reached out with her mind, felt it connect with her baby’s. He was dreaming, now; strange dreams and memories that came from beyond himself, memories of an alien past no human had ever been privy to. Anna wondered what he would be like as he grew up. How would he be different?
All that Anna knew now was that she loved him, deeply and more powerfully than she’d loved anyone besides her husband.
I love you, Baby. I love you.
Anna felt, within Alex’s mind, a response — a sure feeling that he had heard and understood, and that he loved his mother, too.
CHAPTER TWO
I WOKE WITH A START, clutching the covers of my bed. It took a moment to remember where I was. My room was still dark, and Isa still snored softly on the other side of the room. I took a few deep breaths, my eyes still closed, willing my heart to slow down.
It was my first dream in two months, ever since the reversion — at least, my first dream that meant anything. It had been a snippet of Anna’s life; of that I had no doubt. And even if it had happened four hundred years ago, I couldn’t see any particular message behind it.
Ruth had to be none other than the goddess Retha, or at least, who people assumed to be the goddess Retha. And Samuel would be Samal, Michael would be Makai, and Lauren would be Larana. I remembered the Wanderer using these names when I had entered the Xenofold, but in the waking world, it was hard not to think of these people as gods, as I had my whole life. Besides Ruth and Anna, I had yet to see any of their faces, but perhaps there would be more dreams — and perhaps next time, they would make more sense. Regardless, it was something Isaru, Fiona, and Elder Isandru needed to know as soon as possible.
It was well that I had woken up, anyway. I had been rising early for weeks to practice my dueling with Aela. Practicing was my way of blowing off steam. I usually made time for it in the afternoon as well, after my lessons, but I also wanted to practice my forms in the morning. Aela was the only person I knew who was willing to train me, and she had only agreed to do so after I offered to take some of her chores. We met an hour before the first bell in front of the Sanctum. I had signed up for the Spring Tournament, which took place in Nava Village every year during the Spring Festival. This one time a year, the Seekers and those in their charge went down the hill to celebrate with the villagers. I had never been, obviously, but apparently there was food, dancing, music, games, and competitions of all sorts. People were drawn from as far as a hundred miles around, and the Seekers held their own tournaments for the entertainment of the people.
I rose from bed quietly, taking care not to disturb Isa. I put on my initiate’s robe, straightening my hair as much as I could in the darkness. Where I was going, looks wouldn’t matter. Last of all, I threw on my green cloak, the same as I’d received in Haven, before slipping out the door and shutting it quietly behind me.
A few minutes later found me in the front Grove. The sky was still full of stars, but the gray of dawn could be discerned over the Sanctum behind. Within half an hour, orange rays would be slanting around the mountainside, but it wouldn’t be until midmorning that the sun itself would creep above the line of the mountain.
I found Aela already warming up, as was her custom, in the center of the square in front of the Sanctum. She held her blunted practice sword aloft — light, thin, and slightly curved. Seekers were well-practiced in a variety of armaments, but the katana was the one most commonly used in dueling. Every movement was designed to go for a single cut that, in a real battle, would slice through flesh and bone. The sword’s point also made it effective for stabbing, and the object of winning a duel was to avoid your opponent’s mechanizations while working to set up your own. A bout could be over in seconds, or it could take much longer.
Being the weapon Annara herself used, and given its time-tested effectiveness, it was seen as fitting that every Seeker be trained in its use, although Champions were also skilled in the use of long swords, maces, quarter staves, and short bows, among other armaments.
I went to pick up my practice blade, which Aela had brought with her. It lay on the stones a few feet away.
“We still need to work on your Treeform,” Aela said.
I sighed. “Again?”
“It’s the most important to master. As I’ve told you, it can transition into most other forms while providing a stalwart defense.”
“It’s also predictable,” I said.
Aela shrugged. “Not if used correctly. Besides, at the level you’re competing at, you’d be best served mastering one form. If you’re great at one thing, you can beat someone who’s good at ten things.”
“It’s still boring.”
“People who can endure a bit of boringness become victors. This boringness, as you call it, is Resistance building up inside you.”
I resisted the urge to sigh again. I still wasn’t used to thinking in terms of the Four Disciplines, though Aela always seemed to connect my emotions to one of the four.
“See?” Aela said, with a smile. “I can see it in your face. If you can’t learn to love pain, you won’t get anywhere.”
I planted my feet on the ground, imagining that I was a great tree whose roots were sure and unbreakable, as both Champion Garin and Aela had taught me. I allowed calm to settle over, focusing on my breaths. Seeking Silence had become more natural, and within moments, I could calm my mind and not dwell on any particular thought. It was essential to enter combat from a state of calm. On the surface, fighting was chaotic, but in reality, it was anything but. When things move quickly, nothing is more important than silence and order. That is why seeking Silence is the first lesson every initiate learns. If an initiate can’t learn to calm themselves, they’ll be a slave to their emotions, doing whatever feels best in the moment.
The best fighters, Aela had taught me, weren’t merely calm, but so calm that they could envision a fight ten moves ahead, and not just in one direction. They could see a number of scenarios, and knew which forms to transition into. Though they still fought in real time, their concentration, aided by the power of the Xenofold, made it such that they saw things more slowly. This was called Battletrance, and a Seeker entering it could fight and defeat multiple enemies. The Champions trained for hours every day, but the other Sects also made time for training. Most Seekers took great pains to ensure they were in tip top shape, though there were exceptions. Because of the Champions and their Gift of Battletrance, the Covenant feared attacking into the Wild.
I was nowhere near that point, though. Even with six weeks of training, I had yet to score a hit on Aela. She never let me come close. Aela had been apprenticed to the Champions for almost two years now, and unless she allowed me two years to catch up, I’d never be her match. But practicing against someone much better was the best way to improve. I hadn’t entered the Spring Tournament just out of a desire for victory. In the back of my mind, I was already making plans for returning to Colonia. And in order to do that, I had to be skilled at defending myself.
Suddenly, Aela moved. My eyes widened only a moment before I brought my blade up to bear, barely knocking away the blow. I was pushed off
balance, taking several steps back. I managed to keep my feet, but before I could resume my form, I felt the blunted edge of Aela’s blade on my side.
“You must be vigilant,” Aela said. “Your form broke as soon as I made a move.”
“I wasn’t expecting it,” I said.
“The key to Treeform’s defense is that you have to move less to defend than I do to attack. Over time, this will wear me down, no matter how good I am. My body only has so much energy, and as long as you maintain perfect form, you will win…even with inferior strength. This applies not just to me. Champion Tellor himself would fall if he couldn’t break your defenses.”
I laughed at that. Elder Tellor was one of the most powerful Champions in the Order, famous for his size and strength. He easily weighed twice as much as me in muscle.
“Again,” Aela said.
So, we practiced. Now more alert, I made a better showing of myself, but only managed to last a little longer. It took a few of Aela’s precise movements for her score a hit on me again. She held nothing back, and no matter what I tried, her blade found a way to pierce my defenses — or rather, my lack of them.
After I was grounded for the third time, I stayed there and closed my eyes, my chest heaving from exertion.
“Come on,” Aela said. “Again.”
I stayed on the ground. “How do you move so fast?”
She reached out a hand, and I paused a moment before taking it.
“It’s not that I’m moving faster,” Aela said. “I just know what I’m doing. I can read your form like a book. I know where you’ll be weak in two seconds, just because I’ve done this so many times before. You can’t be afraid of looking foolish. Just take that as a given, and the rest will come easier. You’ll soon learn that failure is nothing to be afraid of, but something to be welcomed. Failure is the greatest teacher.”
I nodded, letting her know I understood the lesson. Though Aela was only a couple of years older than me, at nineteen, it seemed as if she was ten years wiser.
“Listen,” she said. “You are doing better. You remember our first day?”
“I’m surprised I do,” I said. “You’d think somewhere in all that clobbering I might have lost a bit of my memory.”
“That’s why we’re sticking to Treeform. It’s boring, yes, but I remember when I was like you, wanting to master everything. But the person who tries to master everything masters nothing.”
“Treeform it is, then.”
The first bell tolled once, signaling that breakfast would soon start. I looked at the Sanctum, its gray stone brighter than before. The sunlight was catching the highest branches of the Great Silverwoods, and the sky was brightening from gray to blue.
“Let’s clean up,” Aela said. “And same time tomorrow. We don’t have to do this anymore if you don’t want. You’re probably good enough to make it to the initiates’ finals, even if we stopped now. Give me two more weeks, though, and I can guarantee you the initiate’s crown. You have talent; that much is clear.”
I thought of my parents back in Colonia — how they could be in danger. I was useless here, and I’d be useless if I didn’t learn how to fight the best I could in the limited time I had. It was crazy to think I could become a blade master in just a few short weeks. I didn’t expect that. Then again, there was the secret that only I and a few other people knew.
I was Anna. Everything I had learned about my identity two months ago was still incredible to me, but if it was all true, maybe I had some sort of advantage. After all, it was Anna who founded the Seekers. She had developed the very sword forms the Seekers used to this day. I didn’t have that knowledge, but perhaps if I kept practicing, it would trigger Anna’s memories. I was having dreams, after all, so who was to say my memories of how to fight wouldn’t come back?
I didn’t know whether it would work, or whether it would be dangerous. It was worth a try, though, and Aela had told me herself that I was progressing quickly.
At the same time, I still didn’t want to admit any of it was true. My dream last night had been the first real evidence that what I had learned at the reversion was true. I wished life could go on as normal — at least for what counted as normal — but I knew it was too late for that.
“Shanti?”
I shook my head. “Sorry. I still want to learn.”
“Good,” Aela said. “Because I really appreciate you mucking the gutters for me.”
My nose wrinkled at that. Aela had been given a particularly unsavory task for her work assignment this week, and I had agreed to take three hours a week off her time. In exchange, Aela had given me an hour of her time every morning. It was generous of her, but I still think she got more out of the deal.
We both went inside to head to breakfast.
CHAPTER THREE
I ATE BREAKFAST WITH ISA, Aela, and Deanna. They were who I usually sat with these days, mostly because Isaru kept himself distant and Ret and Samal usually did a good job of annoying me. Isaru often stayed up so late in the library that he arrived at breakfast red-eyed and not in the mood for conversation. Any time I brought up how he was pushing himself too hard, he brushed me off. He spent almost every spare hour he could in the library, researching who knew what. After a few weeks of this behavior, I gave up even trying to bring him back to reality.
“How goes the training?” Deanna asked.
“Good, I suppose,” I said.
“Maybe we can practice sometime,” Isa said. “You’re probably at my level now.”
It was hard to imagine Isa, who was smaller than me, being at my level. But she had been here six months longer than me, so I supposed she probably was.
“That’s a good idea,” Aela said. “You can join us tomorrow, if you want.”
“I don’t know,” Isa said. “That is quite early. Seeker Marlene has me writing these horrible papers. I’ve been studying in the library almost every night for the past two weeks.” I could see the exhaustion written on her face. “It’s probably too late for me to make a decent showing at the tournament, but I am going to enroll for the archery.”
“I wonder if Isaru is entering,” I said.
“I haven’t seen him practicing,” Deanna said. “Nor have I seen his name on the registers. So far, only six initiates have signed up and there’s only space for eight.”
“You’ll have your work cut out for you,” Aela said. “There’s Nabea, who’s had the benefit of training before even coming here. Isaru would have the same advantage if he enters. Samal looks good as well — there’s a good chance that he’ll make the finals. Then…there’s Alaric.”
I looked at the table near to me, where the red-haired Alaric, both well-muscled and long-limbed, laughed boisterously at something Samal had just said. Both Ret and Samal had become fast friends with him, and they spent almost all their free time practicing in the Grove.
“Alaric will take it,” Deanna said. “He might even be good enough to compete with the apprentices.”
“Where’s he from, anyway?” I asked.
“He’s from the Kingdom of Mongar, in the Eastern Range. Only a few hundred miles from here, actually. It’s still part of the Wild, but many of its people are non-Elekai.”
“Mongar,” I said, remembering what Augur Grenwold had taught me. “It’s the crossroads between the Red Wild and the Eastern Kingdoms.”
Deanna nodded. “It’s a small kingdom. A city-state, really. A lot of the Eastern Kingdoms are that way. There are about a dozen that are larger, but there are hundreds that are small and vassaled to a more powerful kingdom. Mongar is different, though, because a great deal of wealth passes through it. They are a martial people, and field a large army that allows them to control a lot of the kingdoms surrounding it.”
“The Mongari built the Sanctum, too,” Isa said. “They have skilled stonemasons.”
I watched Alaric quietly, wondering how on earth Aela believed I could best him. I remembered what she had told me about Treeform. So long as my defe
nses weren’t broken, I could wear down a larger and stronger opponent. Looking at Alaric, though, I didn’t see how it was possible.
It was then that the bell tolled twice, its reverberations sounding through the open front doors. Everyone rose from their seats to bus their dishes. I made my way to the Seekers’ Dome, dreading Judge Kais’s extended monologues. He had moved from the formation of law in Old Colonia, and was now talking about the formation of law among the Annajen and the Makai during the Third Century. I dreaded studying for his tests most of all, but thankfully, Isaru was usually there to assist me. As an Annajen and the king’s son — in fact, his very surname was Annajen — he already knew quite a bit about Haven law, even in regards to the city’s history.
Isaru joined me quietly as we made our way down the corridor. We entered the Seekers’ Dome. Its grandeur no longer held me in awe and had become a part of the landscape. Sunlight spilled in through the upper windows, lighting the mural of the Final Battle of the Ragnarok War, illuminating the paintings ringing the wall on the second floor balcony. A group of initiates had already gathered at the bottom, where the portly Judge Kais was waiting.
Shortly after our arrival, he looked up from his dais and began giving his lesson. I took care to remember everything he said. Initiates more advanced in their studies took copious notes on paper with charcoal pencils. Even if I had come a long way in two months, I still struggled to write as quickly as them. I could trust Isaru to record anything I missed.
It would be months yet before I was proficient, though. Most Elekai children learn to read and write in Espan, but I had gotten nothing more than the basics — lessons from my mother when I was young, and even so, I hadn’t gotten a lot of practice. I’d probably learned more about writing and language in the past two months than in all the previous years of my life.
In time, the lesson came to an end, and Isaru and I began our journey to the Grove outside. Rather than teaching us inside, Sage Alan had tasked us with collecting samples of xen and categorizing its different varieties. On the surface, it appeared all xen was the same, but careful examination and dissection of its surface revealed different patterns. Depending on the type of xen, it could be turned into different kinds of medicine, or even into foods that could only be made from xen. Sage Alan wanted his pupils to learn hands-on when possible, and usually, Isaru and I worked together.