The Marquise turned back from the opening. She gathered her things together. She tried to pull the flattened bracken to its original height, and so smooth out the signs of habitation, but the hiding place had been made so long that this was impossible. Perhaps it did not matter. Perhaps it would be taken for granted that people came out upon the cliff and took their ease.
Suddenly her knees began to tremble and she sat down. She waited a few moments, then glanced at her watch. She knew that it might be important to remember the time. A few minutes after half past three. If she was asked, she could say, "Yes, I was out on the headland at about half past three, but I heard nothing." That would be the truth. She would not be lying. It would be the truth.
She remembered with relief that today she had brought her mirror in her bag. She glanced at it, fearfully. Her face was chalk white, blotched and strange. She powdered, carefully, gently; it seemed to make no difference. Miss Clay would notice something was wrong. She dabbed dry rouge onto her cheeks, but this stood out, like the painted spots on a clown's face.
"There is only one thing to do," she thought, "and that is to go straight to the bathing cabin on the beach, and undress, and put on my swimming suit, and bathe. Then if I return to the hotel with my hair wet, and my face wet too, it will seem natural, and I shall have been swimming, and that also will be true."
She began to walk back along the cliff, but her legs were weak, as though she had been lying ill in bed for many days, and when she came to the beach at last she was trembling so much she thought she would fall. More than anything she longed to lie down on her bed, in the hotel bedroom, and close the shutters, even the windows, and hide there by herself in the darkness. Yet she must force herself to play the part she had decided.
She went to the bathing cabin and undressed. Already there were several people lying on the sands, reading or sleeping, the hour of siesta drawing to its close. She walked down to the water's edge, kicked off her rope-soled shoes, drew on her cap, and as she swam to and fro in the still, tepid water, and dipped her face, she wondered how many of the people on the beach noticed her, watched her, and afterwards might say, "But don't you remember, we saw a woman come down from the headland in the middle of the afternoon?"
She began to feel very cold, but she continued swimming, backwards and forwards, with stiff, mechanical strokes, until suddenly, seeing a little boy who was playing with a dog point out to sea, and the dog run in barking towards some dark object that might have been a piece of timber, nausea and terror combined to turn her faint, and she stumbled from the sea back to the bathing cabin and lay on the wooden floor, her face in her hands. It might be, she thought, that had she gone on swimming she would have touched him with her feet, as his body came floating in towards her on the water.
In five days' time the Marquis was due to arrive by car and pick up his wife, the governess, and the children, and drive them home. The Marquise put a call through to him at the chateau, and asked if it would be possible for him to come sooner. Yes, the weather was still good, she said, but somehow she had become tired of the place. It was now getting too full of people, it was noisy, and the food had gone off. In fact she had turned against it. She longed to be back at home, she told her husband, among her own things, and the gardens would be looking lovely.
The Marquis regretted very much that she was bored, but surely she could stick it out for just the three days, he said. He had made all his arrangements, and he could not come sooner. He had to pass through Paris anyway for an important business meeting. He would promise to reach her by the morning of the Thursday, and then they could leave immediately after lunch.
"I had hoped," he said, "that you would want to stay on for the weekend, so that I too could get some bathing. The rooms are held surely until the Monday?"
But no, she had told the manager, she said, that they would not require the rooms after Thursday, and he had already let them to someone else. The place was crowded. The charm of it had gone, she assured him. Edouard would not care for it at all, and at the weekend it became quite insupportable. So would he make every effort to arrive in good time on the Thursday, and then they could leave after an early lunch?
The Marquise put down the receiver and went out to the balcony to the chaise longue. She took up a book and pretended to read, but in reality she was listening, waiting for the sound of footsteps, voices, at the entrance to the hotel, and presently for her telephone to ring, and it would be the manager asking her, with many apologies, if she would mind descending to his office. The fact was, the matter was delicate... but the police were with him. They had some idea that she could help them. The telephone did not ring. There were no voices. No footsteps. Life continued as before. The long hours dragged through the interminable day. Lunch on the terrace, the waiters bustling, obsequious, the tables filled with the usual faces or with new visitors to take the place of old, the children chattering, Miss Clay reminding them of their manners. And all the while the Marquise listened, waited... She forced herself to eat, but the food she put in her mouth tasted of sawdust. Lunch over, she mounted to her room, and while the children rested she lay on the chaise longue on the balcony. They descended to the terrace again for tea, but when the children went to the beach for their second bathe of the day she did not go with them. She had a little chill, she told Miss Clay; she did not fancy the water. So she went on sitting there, on her balcony.
When she closed her eyes at night and tried to sleep, she felt his stooping shoulders against her hands once more, and the sensation that it had given her when she pushed them hard. The ease with which he fell and vanished, one moment there, and the next, nothing. No stumble, no cry.
In the daytime she used to strain her eyes towards the headland in search of figures walking there, among the bracken--would they be called "a cordon of police"? But the headland shimmered under the pitiless sun, and no one walked there in the bracken.
Twice Miss Clay suggested going down into the town in the mornings to make purchases, and each time the Marquise made an excuse.
"It's always so crowded," she said, "and so hot. I don't think it's good for the children. The gardens are more pleasant, the lawn at the back of the hotel is shady and quiet."
She herself did not leave the hotel. The thought of the beach brought back the pain in her belly, and the nausea. Nor did she walk.
"I shall be quite all right," she told Miss Clay, "when I have thrown off this tiresome chill."
She lay there on the balcony, turning over the pages of the magazines she had read a dozen times.
On the morning of the third day, just before dejeuner, the children came running onto the balcony, waving little windmill flags.
"Look, maman," said Helene, "mine is red, and Celeste's is blue. We are going to put them on our sand castles after tea."
"Where did you get them?" asked the Marquise.
"In the marketplace," said the child. "Miss Clay took us to the town this morning instead of playing in the garden. She wanted to pick up her snapshots that were to be ready today."
A feeling of shock went through the Marquise. She sat very still.
"Run along," she said, "and get ready for dejeuner."
She could hear the children chattering to Miss Clay in the bathroom. In a moment or two Miss Clay came in. She closed the door behind her. The Marquise forced herself to look up at the governess. Miss Clay's long, rather stupid face was grave and concerned.
"Such a dreadful thing has happened," she said, her voice low. "I don't want to speak of it in front of the children. I am sure you will be very distressed. It's poor Monsieur Paul."
"Monsieur Paul?" said the Marquise. Her voice was perfectly calm. But her tone had the right quality of interest.
"I went down to the shop to fetch my snapshots," said Miss Clay, "and I found it shut. The door was locked and the shutters were up. I thought it rather odd, and I went into the pharmacie next door and asked if they knew whether the shop was likely to be open after tea.
They said no, Mademoiselle Paul was too upset, she was being looked after by relatives. I asked what had happened, and they told me there had been an accident, that poor Monsieur Paul's body had been found by some fishermen three miles up the coast, drowned."
Miss Clay had quite lost color as she told her tale. She was obviously deeply shocked. The Marquise, at sight of her, gained courage.
"How perfectly terrible," she said. "Does anybody know when it happened?"
"I couldn't go into details at the pharmacie because of the children," said Miss Clay, "but I think they found the body yesterday. Terribly injured, they said. He must have hit some rocks before falling into the sea. It's so dreadful I can't bear to think of it. And his poor sister, whatever will she do without him?"
The Marquise put up her hand for silence and made a warning face. The children were coming into the room.
They went down to the terrace for dejeuner and the Marquise ate better than she had done for three days. For some reason her appetite had returned. Why this should be so she could not tell. She wondered if it could possibly be that part of the burden of her secret was now lifted. He was dead. He had been found. These things were known. After dejeuner she told Miss Clay to ask the manager if he knew anything of the sad accident. Miss Clay was to say that the Marquise was most concerned and grieved. While Miss Clay went about this business the Marquise took the children upstairs.
Presently the telephone rang. The sound that she had dreaded. Her heart missed a beat. She took off the receiver and listened.
It was the manager. He said Miss Clay had just been to him. He said it was most gracious of Madame la Marquise to show concern at the unfortunate accident that had befallen Monsieur Paul. He would have spoken of it when the accident was discovered yesterday, but he did not wish to distress the clientele. A drowning disaster was never very pleasant at a seaside resort, it made people feel uncomfortable. Yes, of course, the police had been called in directly the body was found. It was assumed that he had fallen from the cliffs somewhere along the coast. It seemed he was very fond of photographing the sea views. And of course, with his disability, he could easily slip. His sister had often warned him to be careful. It was very sad. He was such a good fellow. Everyone liked him. He had no enemies. And such an artist, too, in his way. Madame la Marquise had been pleased with the studies Monsieur Paul had done of herself and the children? The manager was so glad. He would make a point of letting Mademoiselle Paul know this, and also of the concern shown by Madame la Marquise. Yes, indeed, she would be deeply grateful for flowers, and for a note of sympathy. The poor woman was quite brokenhearted. No, the day of the funeral had not yet been decided...
When he had finished speaking, the Marquise called to Miss Clay, and told her she must order a taxi and drive to the town seven miles inland, where the shops were larger, and where she seemed to remember there was an excellent florist. Miss Clay was to order flowers, lilies for choice, and to spare no expense, and the Marquise would write a note to go with them; and then if Miss Clay gave them to the manager when she returned he would see that they reached Mademoiselle Paul.
The Marquise wrote the note for Miss Clay to take with her to pin on the flowers. "In deepest sympathy at your great loss." She gave Miss Clay some money, and the governess went off to find a taxi.
Later the Marquise took the children to the beach.
"Is your chill better, maman?" asked Celeste.
"Yes, cherie, now maman can bathe again."
And she entered the warm yielding water with the children, and splashed with them.
Tomorrow Edouard would arrive, tomorrow Edouard would come in his car and drive them away, and the white dusty roads would lengthen the distance between her and the hotel. She would not see it anymore, nor the headland, nor the town, and the holiday would be blotted out like something that had never been.
"When I die," thought the Marquise, as she stared out across the sea, "I shall be punished. I don't fool myself. I am guilty of taking life. When I die, God will accuse me. Until then, I will be a good wife to Edouard, and a good mother to Celeste and Helene. I will try to be a good woman from now. I will try and atone for what I have done by being kinder to everyone, to relations, friends, servants."
She slept well for the first time for four days.
Her husband arrived the next morning while she was still having her breakfast. She was so glad to see him that she sprang from her bed and flung her arms round his neck. The Marquis was touched at this reception.
"I believe my girl has missed me after all," he said.
"Missed you? But of course I've missed you. That's why I rang up. I wanted you to come so much."
"And you are quite determined to leave today after lunch?"
"Oh, yes, yes... I couldn't bear to stay. Our packing is done, there are only the last things to put in the suitcases."
He sat on the balcony drinking coffee, laughing with the children, while she dressed and stripped the room of her personal possessions. The room that had been hers for a whole month became bare once more, and quite impersonal. In a fever of hurry she cleared the dressing table, mantelpiece, the table by her bed. It was finished with. The femme de chambre would come in presently with clean sheets and make all fresh for the next visitor. And she, the Marquise, would have gone.
"Listen, Edouard," she said, "why must we stay for dejeuner? Wouldn't it be more fun to lunch somewhere on the way? There is always something a little dreary in lunching at a hotel when one has already paid the bill. Tipping, everything, has been done. I cannot bear a sense of anticlimax."
"Just as you like," he said. She had given him such a welcome that he was prepared to gratify every whim. Poor little girl. She had been really lonely without him. He must make up to her for it.
The Marquise was making up her mouth in front of the mirror in the bathroom when the telephone rang.
"Answer it, will you?" she called to her husband. "It is probably the concierge about the luggage."
The Marquis did so, and in a few moments he shouted through to his wife.
"It's for you, dear. It's a Mademoiselle Paul who has called to see you, and asks if she may thank you for her flowers before you go."
The Marquise did not answer at once, and when his wife came into the bedroom it seemed to him that the lipstick had not enhanced her appearance. It made her look almost haggard, older. How very strange. She must have changed the color. It was not becoming.
"Well," he asked, "what shall I say? You probably don't want to be bothered with her now, whoever she is. Would you like me to go down and get rid of her?"
The Marquise seemed uncertain, troubled. "No," she said, "no, I think I had better see her. The fact is, it's a very tragic thing. She and her brother kept a little shop in the town--I had some photographs done of myself and the children--and then a dreadful thing happened, the brother was drowned. I thought it only right to send flowers."
"How thoughtful of you," said her husband, "a very kind gesture. But do you need to bother now? Why, we are ready to go."
"Tell her that," said his wife, "tell her that we are leaving almost immediately."
The Marquis turned to the telephone again, and after a word or two put his hand over the receiver and whispered to his wife.
"She is very insistent," he said. "She says she has some prints belonging to you that she wants to give to you personally."
A feeling of panic came over the Marquise. Prints? What prints?
"But everything is paid for," she whispered back. "I don't know what she can mean."
The Marquis shrugged his shoulders.
"Well, what am I to say? She sounds as if she is crying."
The Marquise went back into the bathroom, dabbed more powder on her nose.
"Tell her to come up," she said, "but repeat that we are leaving in five minutes. Meanwhile, you go down, take the children to the car. Take Miss Clay with you. I will see the woman alone."
When he had gone she looked about the
room. Nothing remained but her gloves, her handbag. One last effort, and then the closing door, the ascenseur, the farewell bow to the manager, and freedom.
There was a knock at the door. The Marquise waited by the entrance to the balcony, her hands clasped in front of her.
"Entrez," she said.
Mademoiselle Paul opened the door. Her face was blotched and ravaged from weeping, her old-fashioned mourning dress was long, nearly touching the ground. She hesitated, then lurched forward, her limp grotesque, as though each movement must be agony.
"Madame la Marquise..." she began, then her mouth worked, she began to cry.
"Please don't," said the Marquise gently. "I am so dreadfully sorry for what has happened."
Mademoiselle Paul took her handkerchief and blew her nose.
"He was all I had in the world," she said. "He was so good to me. What am I to do now? How am I to live?"
"You have relatives?"
"They are poor folk, Madame la Marquise. I cannot expect them to support me. Nor can I keep the shop alone, without my brother. I haven't the strength. My health has always been my trouble."
The Marquise was fumbling in her bag. She took out a twenty-thousand-franc note.
"I know this is not much," she said, "but perhaps it will help just a little. I am afraid my husband has not many contacts in this part of the country, but I will ask him, perhaps he will be able to make some suggestions."
Mademoiselle Paul took the note. It was strange. She did not thank the Marquise. "This will keep me until the end of the month," she said. "It will help to pay the funeral expenses."
She opened her bag. She took out three prints.
"I have more, similar to these, back in the shop," she said. "It seemed to me that perhaps, going away suddenly as you are doing, you had forgotten all about them. I found them among my poor brother's other prints and negatives in the cellar, where he used to develop them."
The Birds and Other Stories Page 22