Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? On the Side: Sword Oratoria, Vol. 5

by Fujino Omori, Kiyotaka Haimura

  Lefiya, however, just continued her red-faced tirade, taking umbrage at everything coming from Bell’s mouth.

  The two novice adventurers could only pant heavily, wiping the continuous sweat from their brows as they stood beneath the lofty branches.

  Lefiya had finally caught up to Bell only a few minutes prior. Just when she’d been about to strike down the frightened rabbit with her staff, she’d broken free of her trance long enough to realize nothing around her looked familiar.

  The silence was deafening. The road back was unclear. And the deep, dark, spine-tingling forest all around them quickly brought reality down on them hard as they stood there in their cold sweats, silently wondering what it was they should do.

  Running about recklessly would get them nowhere fast, which meant staying put was their best option for now.

  “R-really, it’s your fault, you know? You shouldn’t have run away! And especially not this deep within the forest!”

  “A-and end up dead…?! No, thank you!”

  “Just what do you take me for?! I would never kill you! I only wanted to…beat you within an inch of your life, that’s all!”

  “Oh, because that’s so much better!”

  Almost as soon as they were able to breathe normally again, the squabbling started.

  Bell’s portable magic-stone lantern wobbled back and forth in time with his words.

  “Well, you’re the one who had to go and force Miss Aiz to give you special training! The impudence! You do realize you’re of different familias, yes? And not even ones with amiable relations! You don’t find that the least bit strange?!”

  “Uhhh…”

  “Miss Aiz is a first-tier adventurer! The Sword Princess! The ever-so-powerful, ever-so-beautiful, ever-so-lovely Sword Princess! She is not someone from whom lower-class nobodies can receive training! Do you not have even the slightest shred of common sense within that head of yours?!”

  Before she knew it, Lefiya was rattling off everything she’d been keeping bottled up for so long. Face flushed, she closed in on the boy, leaving him cowering in fear and lost for a counterargument.

  “Not only did you have the gall to monopolize Miss Aiz for a whole day—a whole day!—you then proceeded to come down here and have her waiting on you hand and foot…! I’m…I’m so jealous! No, I’m appalled!!”

  “Guhhhh…?!”

  She couldn’t stop it now. Her insides were bubbling like a witch’s cauldron, hotter and higher and more and more furious as everything came tumbling out. It was one thing after the other after another as she laid bare his every sin, from his time spent training with Aiz atop the wall before the expedition all the way until today, with her own personal grudge rearing its head from time to time.

  Bell could do nothing but bend farther and farther backward beneath the onslaught.

  “And then…as if that weren’t enough! You…you saw her naked body…!!”

  “I-I-I-I-I-I-I’m sorryyyyyyy!!”

  “You did, didn’t you?!

  “Huh?!”

  “You saw it, didn’t you?!”

  “Saw what?!”

  “Do you really want to make me say it?!”

  “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorrrrryyyyyyyyyyy!!”

  Lefiya felt tears sting the corners of her eyes at the boy’s implied confession.

  “Don’t you feel shame as a human being? You’re the worst! The absolute worst! The most vile, degenerate human being in all of existence!!” she screamed, eyes clenched shut.

  It was a brilliant, scathing finishing blow, and Bell’s body curled in on itself with an audible “Gnnghh!”

  He took a few teetering steps backward…then let his head fall with a dramatic, soundless slump.

  The girl’s mighty tempest had finally passed.

  “Haah…haah…” Only her ragged breathing could be heard within the dim quietude of the forest, the exertion forcing her shoulders up and down with each breath.

  Still, the boy said nothing. He had no rebuttal. No excuse. His white hair hung down over his eyes like the ears of a dejected rabbit.

  As the magic-stone lantern in his hand continued to exude its light, Lefiya turned her eyes away.

  This was the first time since she’d met him that she’d been able to speak her mind.

  She’d let everything out, all of it, and as she stood there in awkward silence now, she couldn’t help but think that she’d gone too far.

  Just as she began to feel truly guilty at her one-sided verbal bludgeoning of the boy…Gurgle.

  Bell’s stomach rumbled.

  “…”

  “…”

  Though his face was still pointed downward, the tips of his ears turned visibly red.

  Timidly and ever so slowly, he began to raise his head. The moment his gaze met Lefiya’s, however, it snapped back down.

  “That was, uh…well…Don’t, uh…”

  “…Are you…hungry?”

  “I, erm…no? I-I mean, well…y-yes…” he squeaked, his voice growing smaller and smaller.

  They’d begun their wild chase right before dinnertime. It was likely he hadn’t eaten any lunch, either, running around all day as he had within the forest.

  Lefiya sighed.

  Their war would have to wait.

  A quick survey of their surroundings yielded nothing in terms of readily available fruit. Her thoughts went, instead, to her person, and she scrounged around in her battle clothes…only to discover something located neatly in her breast pocket.

  The crystal drops Aiz had given her two days prior.

  Hnngh…

  Her eyebrows furrowed as she eyed the two tiny teardrop shapes in the palm of her hand.

  They’d been her badge of honor, so to speak, for saving her beloved, and as they sat there, glittering and sparkling in their bluish-white auras…she let out a sigh.

  Taking one of the droplets between her fingers, she handed it to Bell.

  “Here.”

  “Huh…?”

  “You are hungry, are you not? While it may not be incredibly filling…it should help ease the cravings,” she explained, looking everywhere but at him.

  Bell seemed stunned.

  Finally, though looking somewhat lost and altogether apologetic…he took the offered crystal drop.

  “But…but this…”

  “Just take it! It’s fine!”

  “O-okay!”

  Even Bell could feel the shame in Lefiya’s words.

  Lefiya, at the same time, did her best to mask the flush rising to her cheeks by raising her voice.

  “Though before you eat it, know that the value of this crystal drop is unprecedented, and you must fully savor its exquisite flavor! It could easily go for thirty thousand valis on the surface!”

  “Th-thirty thousand valis for this tiny thing…?!” Bell gave a shocked shudder. It was even more expensive than the equipment on his back.

  “Well, that’s for an entire bottle of them…but still!” Lefiya added, a droplet of sweat working its way down her temple. She watched in awkward apprehension as he brought the tiny drop nervously to his lips, and then she followed suit.

  Once the deed had been done, they took a seat somewhat unconsciously at the base of a nearby tree to get some rest.

  The forest was as dark as ever around them.

  The Dungeon’s ceiling was all but invisible beyond the mesh-like canopy of branches and leaves above their heads. It was cold, too, no doubt a result of the faux night that had settled over the entire floor. There in the faint blue glow of the crystals adorning the tree trunk’s base, the two sat side by side, Bell’s magic-stone lantern placed between them and illuminating their profiles.

  They said nothing, their backs to the tree as they stared into the darkness around them.

  It was oppressing—this aura of awkward discomfort hanging over the two as they rolled the hard candy around in their mouths.

  The strange feeling of distance between them s
aid much about the relationship they’d formed.

  “—Ooooaaaaaahhhhh.”

  “—!”

  A roar cut its way through the quiet.

  The pair’s shoulders twitched.

  As if on cue, they looked to each other in horror.

  Just the two of us, this deep in the forest…! This is no time for us to let our guards down! Lefiya thought to herself, admittedly too late.

  It was dangerous in this forest at night. It was most assuredly not a place they could pleasantly pass the time until morning, at least not with just the two of them.

  The last of the crystal drop dissolving in her mouth, Lefiya rose to her feet.

  “We…we need to return to camp…somehow. It’s too dangerous for us to remain here.”

  “R-right…” Bell nodded as he hurriedly followed her lead.

  Lefiya quickly glanced in his direction before once again surveying their surroundings.

  To the left, to the right, behind, in front, and even overhead, the trees grew thick. She couldn’t make out even the slightest glimmer of light from the magic-stone lanterns undoubtedly shining brightly in Rivira or Loki Familia’s camp.

  If I were to use my magic, Miss Aiz and the others would surely notice…wouldn’t they?

  Yes, a brilliant flash of light, like a firework straight overhead—the ever reliable first-tiers would definitely see it, and so long as they stayed where they were, help would be there shortly.

  And yet…what kind of impression would that make?

  Running off completely of her own volition, then summoning her companions to come rescue her? The shame! Lefiya had at least some self-respect.

  As reluctant as she was to admit it, the fault here was entirely her own.

  She had to get them out of this and safely back to camp herself.

  I simply need to pull myself together…she thought to herself, sneaking a glance at the boy next to her, who was currently using his magic-stone lantern to scan the perimeter.

  He was a Level 2, a third-tier adventurer.

  She was one level higher at Level 3, a highly ranked mage and a second-tier adventurer.

  When it came to both Status and experience, she had the upper hand.

  “Can I perhaps…ask you something? Just how old are you?”

  “Huh? I’m, uh…fourteen.”

  As expected, he was younger than her, as well. That would make her his senior.

  Which made it all the more essential that she come up with something to get them out of this mess—a thought that made her focus sharpen.

  “Don’t go to pieces now, all right?! Just follow my lead and don’t do anything stupid!” Lefiya was remarkably leader-like as she raised her index finger in strict instruction, her other hand still tightly gripping her staff.

  “R-roger!!” Bell replied between fervent nods of his head.

  Lefiya was, after all, a member of Loki Familia.

  She couldn’t allow herself to appear feckless or cowardly in front of someone from a different familia.

  Pushing down the insecure little girl who so often reared her head in front of Aiz and the others, she assumed a bearing worthy of the reputation and prestige of the largest familia in all of Orario.

  She wouldn’t reveal the fear and anxiety fluttering in her heart. As determined fortitude flowed through her veins, she led Bell away from the tree and into the night.

  Just stay calm, keep your wits about you, never let your guard down…

  She took the magic-stone lantern from Bell, using it to illuminate the forest in front of her as she walked. Bell himself, she ordered to keep watch behind them.

  For so long she’d been protected by, saved by Aiz and the others.

  Now it was her turn. She could handle this. She had a duty.

  Even if it was nothing more than a charade, Lefiya’s countenance was one of a true second-tier adventurer. There was no doubt that she’d grown beyond the small, scared child always hiding behind Aiz and the others.

  This was a role she’d never had a chance to fulfill, what with the entire legion of distinguished elites among Loki Familia’s ranks. The scared, anxious lower-level adventurer glancing to and fro behind her was her responsibility as she led him single-handedly through the forest.

  She used blue crystals to denote their path, breaking off tiny pieces and scattering the glittering shards behind them as they walked. She marked their passage on the trees with a large X, being sure to carve it deep enough that the self-restorative wood wouldn’t immediately fill the gouge back up.

  And there were other times, too, that she caught wind of monsters nearby, and she and Bell would quickly snuff out the light before hiding themselves in the brush. They let monster after monster pass by them, not wanting to throw themselves into battle unless absolutely necessary.

  “Erm…Miss Viridis?” the timid voice called from behind her.

  “…It’s Lefiya.”

  “Huh?”

  “You may simply call me Lefiya. I’m not partial to non-elves using my tribe’s name. But back to the matter at hand, do you need something?” she responded curtly, eyes trained straight forward.

  “The members of Loki Familia…they can really do anything, can’t they?” Bell asked, undaunted, as he followed behind her unfaltering forward march.

  “…? What do you mean?”

  “Erm, it’s just…you’re a mage, right, Miss Lefiya? And yet you’re still so…so…I don’t know, driven. Like, even right now, just charging through the forest like some kind of explorer…It’s impressive. Makes me think that Loki Familia can do just about anything.”

  “D-d-driven…?!” Lefiya’s cheeks flushed without warning at the boy’s unadulterated praise. “F-flattery won’t do you any good, you know?! We should keep all conversation to a minimum!” Lefiya whirled around in anger.

  “I-I’m sorry!!” Bell immediately shrank backward.

  “Really now!” she huffed, eyebrows bristling. She did not appreciate this surprise attack on her mental state.

  Turning away from the boy and his look of apology, she took off at a brisk walk.

  “…Miss Lefiya?”

  “What is it now?” Her voice had an edge to it.

  But the boy’s reply was soft. “I guess…if you weren’t able to do anything, you wouldn’t be any help to Mister Finn and…Miss Aiz and the others…right?”

  The second the words left his mouth…

  Lefiya’s feet came to an abrupt stop.

  But only momentarily. She forced her legs to restart, attempting a slow, careful response as she pushed forward.

  “This is true. If you weren’t, then…then you would never be able to catch up to them.”

  Silence settled over the pair.

  The gentle rustling of the grasses beneath their feet provided the only accompaniment to their footsteps.

  For the first time, they’d reached a sort of mutual understanding. Without even realizing it, both of them existed on the same plane, their hearts beating for the same cause.

  And so they continued like that for a short while.

  Until what appeared in front of them was a tree so tall they had to strain their necks just to see it in its entirety.

  Lefiya took a moment to survey their surroundings before beginning her investigation of the tree.

  Even among the many large trees of the forest, this tree in particular was monstrously wide and skyscrapingly tall.

  Perhaps this tree…Yes…

  Lefiya hadn’t just been arbitrarily wandering through the forest.

  She’d been searching for a tree just like this one, tall and towering over the rest, from which she’d be able to ascertain their location.

  Using the giant tree at the forest’s center, a tree visible even from the passageway leading to the next floor, one could quickly position themselves within the vast forest, making it easier to locate a way out.

  “I’m going to climb this tree and scout the perimeter. You stay here.”<
br />
  “Ah…okay. Roger that.”

  Lefiya prepped herself with a mental hurrah, then positioned herself next to the tree, fully prepared to climb the mighty giant…until she took another glance at Bell.

  She instantly scowled, holding down the hem of her skirt as a flush rose to her face.

  “You are not to look upward, do you understand me?!”

  “Huh? I, uh…”

  “Should you even think about it, you’ll wish you’d never been born! Am I clear?!” Her voice rose to a threatening hiss.

  “C-c-crystal!!” Bell asserted without hesitation.

  Still battling the red tinge on her cheeks, Lefiya leaped from the ground with an almost audible bound, flying up into the tree and making her way toward its crown, leaving the boy behind to stand watch.

  Again and again she jumped, positioning her feet on the tree’s many branches.

  Bell, still down on the ground with his magic-stone lantern, gave the elf a good, long period of time before he hesitantly raised his eyes skyward. Thankfully, Lefiya had already disappeared from view.

  “She really can do anything…” he murmured in awe at the second-tier adventurer’s hands-free ability to scale the tree using nothing but jumps.

  Meanwhile, Lefiya, oblivious to the goings-on down below, leaped her way onto a particularly large branch not far from the top of the tree.

  From here, it was just as she’d predicted—above the dome of green leaves, she could look out across the entirety of the floor.

  She turned her gaze to the left, locating the mighty tree at the forest’s center. Between her and the tree towered a giant crystal, emitting its faint blue light. It would seem they were in the eastern part of the floor—close to the easternmost tip, even.

  She studied the view carefully, memorizing the lay of the land—

  —when suddenly…

  “Huh—?”

  …her eyes dropped to the forest below.

  Hastily, she hid herself within the branches’ shadows.

  Using the enhanced vision made possible by her Status, she trained her azure eyes on the forest floor, where she caught sight of a group of dubious figures enshrouded in long, concealing robes.

  Their inky black garments melted into the surrounding shadow, completely masking their faces and identities. And, as if their robes weren’t enough, each one also donned a dark hood and forehead protector, ensconcing them all the more.