by Terri Dixon
Part XXIV
And I definitely gravitate toward people who use laughter to pull themselves out of the abyss.
-Lea Thompson
It seemed like an eternity in that kitchen. I felt my pancakes coming back up again. I hated feeling so nervous, but I was out of my element, and I was a wreck. I wondered by now if my mother had died of a heart attack, or if she might still be hanging in there hoping for my safe return. I didn’t know what to think as I watched Steve head off over hill and dale in a monster Hummer through some of the deepest snow I'd ever seen.
Tania wasn’t saying much. I think that the idea that the secret police were going through her underwear at the same time that her teacher was driving through the Russian countryside in a monster truck in search of the man who was trying to forge passports for us, had finally pushed her over the edge. I hadn’t seen her that quiet since I’d met her a few months ago and certainly not since we'd arrived in this bizarre version of Russia.
Tish had made every point possible, so she ate her eggs and left the room. She didn’t want us mucking up her life anymore. That was perfectly clear. I didn’t mind that she’d left us. She scared me. Russian police might arrest me, but Tish might kill me if I pissed her off again. My existence seemed to piss her off, so I intended to walk on egg shells until I could get the hell out of there.
Suddenly, as I was staring at the remains of my pancakes, I heard the familiar sound of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” coming from my cell phone. I realized that I’d forgotten to change my ring tones after the holidays. I’d been too busy getting ready for my trip. I knew I should call my mom, but she was still convinced that cell phones caused brain cancer and that I would die. It was the only way that I could talk to her, but I didn't want her to worry about anything else. Santa Claus is Coming to Town was the caller unknown tone. I looked at the number. It didn’t make any sense at all to me. Then I realized that it was a Russian number. The structure was completely different from the U.S.
Tania was watching me as I answered the phone. “Hello.” I said, not knowing what it could be about.
“Stacie, is that you?” I heard Peter’s voice coming from the other end.
“Yes, Peter?” I asked. I couldn’t believe it. How did he know my number? From the look on Tania’s face, she was wondering the same thing. “How did you know this number?”
“It’s not important.” He replied. I heard a lot of background noise. I wondered where he was. “I have to be quick here. They can trace these pretty well. I need you to do something for me.”
“Like what?” I asked. “Steve left here to look for you. He took the Hummer. Tish told him to. The police are searching for me.”
“That shouldn’t surprise you.” He answered. “They are extremely worried about your existence. But we’ve already covered that.” He paused and said thank you to someone. “Anyway, good. So, Steve’s coming where, to the lab?”
“Yes.” I replied. “That’s where you are, right? That's what your grandma said.”
“She guessed well and, no, but I’m close. I’ll go over there and meet him.” He paused to tell someone that something looked good. I wondered what the hell was going on. “Look, I have an idea. Therefore, I think that if we get you to St. Petersburg, I can get you home.”
Well, I was getting my money’s worth out of this trip. “Won't these people be watching St. Petersburg if they're actually looking for me? And, isn't it hundreds of miles away?” I asked. I looked over and saw the expression on Tania’s face. She was going to snap at some point along the wild way. She had a crazy look in her eyes.
“Yes, but they aren’t going to be looking for you as diligently up there.” He said. “They wouldn’t think that you would go that far away from your passport. If we run up to Tver, we can catch the train up to St. Petersburg. It will only take a few hours on the train to get there. Then, with your new passports, you can go home. What do you say?”
I guessed that I didn’t have a choice. I also didn’t have a better idea. It wasn't like I knew anything about travel and survival in Russia. “Sure. Are you sure that the passports will work?” I asked. “I’m sure that they’re encrypted and extremely sophisticated these days. Will they pass?”
“Hey, I don’t know if you’ve heard or not, but I’m one of the best hackers in the business. I think that I can handle a couple of passports. I have another surprise for you too.”
I waited for him to tell me, but he paused and was obviously going to make me ask. “Well, what?”
“I’ll show you when I see you.” He said. I could hear the playfulness in his voice. “I need you and Tania to get ready to go. I’ll go find Steve and we’ll come back there and pick you up. We’ll go to Tver for the night and catch tomorrow’s train. Your picture is all over the television, so I need you to try and change your appearance. Tish dyes her hair. Why don’t you girls break into her stash and change that blonde hair of yours. Then I want you to borrow some of her clothes. Both of you should do that. You’re all about the same size. Take some of her stuff along for tomorrow too. We should be there to pick you up soon.”
He ended the call. I didn’t get a chance to reply. I didn’t know where Tver was. I didn’t know how I was supposed to pay for my plane ticket or my train ticket. I was confused. I didn’t want to get into anything of Tish’s. That woman would probably kill me for touching her stuff.
I looked up at Tania and realized that I had to further upset her fragile composition by telling her that she had to help me steal Tish’s stuff, dye my hair, and then join me in dressing like a Russian grandma. Tania had reached a permanent look of despair. Her expression hadn’t changed since Steve had left. I was hoping that they were having an affair and her sallow expression was because she missed him. I was hoping that it was something shallow and understandable. I didn’t want it to be the full mental meltdown that I feared was eventually coming down the pike.
Tania interrupted my unsettling thoughts. “What did he tell you?” She asked. “Did he say where he was, or when we were going home, or if Steve was okay?”
“Yeah.” I told her. Then I told her what he’d said we should do. I told her that we were going to catch the train from Tver to St. Petersburg. I told her everything he'd told me.
Tania got up and walked to the dishwasher. She gently put her dishes in it. I was worried about her. She turned and looked at me. “He’s serious,” she commented.
“I guess so,” I said. I didn’t know how to answer her.
Tania slowly stretched her face into a huge smile. Then she let out a loud laugh and slapped herself on the leg. “That old bat is going to freak out if we steal her clothes,” she laughed.
I suddenly realized that Tania was all right. She apparently was being cautious about her actions in the house. Suddenly she sounded like the girl I met on Facebook. I started to laugh a little too.
“Forget that. Imagine what she’ll do when we steal her hair dye,” I laughed.
Tania slipped into the chair next to me at the table. She leaned over to me and whispered. “Do you think she’s listening to us?” She asked.
“I don’t know,” I scoffed. She probably was. “I do know that we need to figure out where her stuff is, and how to get to it without her blowing our heads off with a shotgun or something.”
“Well, you could always go and tell her that Peter called, and I’ll go and steal the stuff while you’re telling her. It all has to be in her room and her bathroom, right? I know I’m an American, but we all keep our clothes and stuff in the bedroom, right?”
“Of course,” I said. “Where did she go?”
“I don’t know,” Tania replied. “I guess we’ll have to go and look for her. There are a lot of rooms. Where would you go after breakfast if you were Tish?”
That was an interesting question. I figured that she would be more
interested in finding her grandson than anything else. Surely she was worried about all of the political problems that could potentially land on her doorstep. I thought about it for a moment, and then I remembered seeing a media room next to the library on the second floor.
“I’ve got her.” I told Tania, as I walked out of the room.
The Ring of the Queen