‘You think?’
‘Phil looks like he’s lost his favourite playmate.’
‘If you’re right, he has. They’ve been a team for a long time.’
Alex had to admit that, earlier at the debrief, Phil had had the look of someone who’d been abandoned and wasn’t sure why. Dee had been brisk and professional in his absence. With her usual efficiency she’d kept the civils contract employees working at full throttle while their boss had been at home with his family.
‘Ah, well, aren’t you the clever one,’ Alex said. ‘Another chapter ends. Another begins.’
‘Gee, you’re all philosophical today.’ Leah moved the hard hat off the visitors chair in front of Alex’s desk and sat down. ‘Dee didn’t like the direction her life was going so she did something about it. More power to her.’
‘You reckon it’s a simple as that?’
Her brow wrinkled and she stuck out her bottom lip, sending a bolt of electricity straight to his groin. He’d like to taste her lips again, anytime soon.
But after saying those four fateful words, I’ve had a vasectomy, Alex wondered if he’d ever get the chance again. Wondered if it would be some other bloke who’d have that pleasure; some bloke with readily available sperm.
The distasteful thought had the effect of a circuit breaker and he focused on what she was saying.
‘Yeah, I do think it can be as simple as that, sometimes. Most times the actual decision is quite simple. Will I? Won’t I? Do I? Don’t I? It’s the maze you have to navigate to get to the simple decision – and its repercussions – that are the killers.’
‘Now who’s being all philosophical?’
She angled her head sideways and smiled. Their eyes met and he experienced a pang of longing so strong he nearly gasped.
‘It takes courage to step out into the unknown, out of your comfort zone; to go against the status quo,’ she said, and he knew she was right.
They regarded each other unflinchingly until Leah slapped her palms against her thighs and stood up. ‘I’m off to dinner,’ she said. ‘Are you coming?’
He glanced at his computer screen, sizing up the emails in his inbox, and sighed. ‘No, I’ll get something later. Too much to do here.’
‘Fair enough,’ she said brightly, but he noticed disappointment flit across her face.
After the back door had slammed and silence had settled, Alex made himself a cup of tea and resigned himself to yet another evening spent on the endless reports required of his position. He told himself that keeping this distance between them was for the best. It pained him, but if there was going to be a next move it needed to come from her.
It came much sooner than even he had hoped. He could have kissed Syd when three hours later, as he was about to lock their office door, Leah burst through the back door of the admin block.
‘I won!’ she cried. ‘And about time too.’ She laughed and did a clumsy little jig, before tripping and nearly falling flat on her face.
‘These bloody boots,’ she cursed, before grabbing hold of his outstretched hands. Her face was flushed with excitement.
‘Well done, you,’ he said, and did what felt like the right thing to do in the circumstances – he leaned forward and pressed his lips against her cheek in a congratulatory kiss.
Her skin was warm and fragrant; her lips glistened. She moved her head and his mouth grazed an involuntary pathway across her cheek towards her own. She shuffled closer, lifting her hands to frame his face, and he gathered her into his arms.
‘I’ve missed you,’ she whispered, the words a sigh against his lips. Then she kissed him. What started as a gentle reacquainting quickly became an explosion of passion that took Alex’s breath and left his heart pounding, pushing blood southwards.
‘Do you think we should move this someplace more private?’ he asked. He reached back and grappled with the doorknob to their office, grateful he hadn’t locked the door already.
Leah didn’t need an invitation. He grinned wickedly when she propelled him through the open door and slammed it shut behind them, locking it from the inside.
They were both more than happy to pick up where they’d left off seconds before. But Leah’s bottom didn’t quite fit on his desk, not with everything else on it, and it wasn’t long before the in-tray went crashing to the floor. They both stilled.
‘Are you sure about doing this here?’ he whispered close to her ear.
She peered down at the front of her gaping shirt and groaned, ‘Oh, hell! What are we thinking?’
‘We’re not thinking,’ he said. With regret he moved her legs from around his hips and stepped back. He screwed up his face as he’d tucked in his shirt, easing the front of his jeans.
‘It’s not every night you beat Syd at chess,’ she said, buttoning up her shirt.
‘More’s the pity,’ he replied, and she laughed.
Alex unlocked the door. ‘You go first. I’ll wait five minutes before I leave. Are you going back to your room?’
She nodded. ‘I’d love to invite you back, but what if someone came knocking on my door because they were sick? Not a good look, the safety advisor in bed with the site supervisor.’
She was right. It’d be through the camp faster than a virus. ‘Looks like it’ll be a cold shower tonight,’ he said, before he kissed her, hot and hard. ‘Go,’ he said and practically pushed her out the door before he changed his mind.
The following morning when Leah let herself out, Alex’s room was in darkness. Disappointed, she went to breakfast on her own.
Syd was replenishing the hot food when she ambled into the mess.
‘Ah, it’s the winner herself,’ he said with a grin. ‘I’ll never live it down.’
‘Probably a one-off,’ she said, dropping a couple of slices of bread into the toaster. ‘You’re a far better chess player than I’ll ever be.’
‘You’d get better if you practised more,’ he said, and disappeared into the kitchen with the empty trays.
Leah took her breakfast and sat with Ben and Jason Roberts, surreptitiously scanning the dining room for any sign of Alex.
‘Well, the boss was right,’ Ben said, eyeing her up and down.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Alex said you’d eventually beat Syd. I told him he was dreaming.’
‘Beginner’s luck,’ she said, and tucked into toast and scrambled eggs.
Alex was standing at the sink making a coffee when she walked into the admin block. ‘Good morning,’ he said. ‘How’s the chess champion this morning?’
She quirked an eyebrow at him. ‘Didn’t you go to breakfast?’
‘I went earlier,’ he said. ‘I needed to catch Phil and he’s always there first thing.’
‘How is he?’
‘Looked okay, and Ben said he only had a couple of beers last night and went back to his room. My little talk the other morning must have worked, for the time being anyway.’
Alex followed her into their office, nearly bumping into her when she stopped abruptly to stare at his desk. Everything on it had been haphazardly pushed to one side, and to her the imprint of her bottom seemed obvious on the dusty desktop. The in-tray sat on the visitor’s chair. Leah looked over her shoulder and her eyes connected with his. A bare hint of a smile touched his lips.
She glanced at the empty wastepaper basket by her desk. ‘I wonder what the cleaner thought?’
‘Who knows,’ he said, moving everything back to where it belonged. ‘Probably didn’t think anything.’
Leah scanned his desk one more time and, with a mental shrug, moved on to prepare for the daily pre-start meeting. This morning she was giving a five-minute session on the importance of wearing eye protection. She had some gory photos of eye injuries to pass around as a reminder of what could happen if they didn’t wear safety glasses when they were supposed to.
A couple of hours later Leah was in the first-aid room when there was a tap on the door.
‘Come in,’ sh
e called and the door opened. Leah looked up from recording the fridge temperatures in the logbook. ‘Hi, Stacey. What’s up?’
‘I wanted to tell you that when I was on leave I told Gary about the baby, and he’s totally okay with it.’
‘That’s terrific news!’
‘Yeah, he said that we shouldn’t, like, get married or anything, but no matter what happens he’ll always look out for me and the baby.’
‘And you’re okay with that?’ Leah asked.
Stacey picked at a fingernail. ‘I suppose I have to be,’ she said in a small voice. ‘Mum says it’s better than nothing, that I shouldn’t expect too much. A lotta blokes would have taken off. But I was hoping, you know . . .’ She shrugged her thin shoulders.
‘Yeah. But you’ll manage, Stacey. I know you will. Your mum sounds like she’s there for you, and there’re lots of people out there willing to help, if you ask. You’ll be an awesome mum.’
Stacey took Leah by surprise when she threw her arms around her in an awkward, bony hug.
‘Thanks, Leah. You’ve been so kind to me. Even though I didn’t deserve it,’ Stacey said, a flush of embarrassment staining her sallow cheeks. ‘And I promise I won’t say anything.’
Leah’s heart gave a heavy thud. ‘Say anything about what?’
‘You and Mr McKinley. I, um, came in to do the vacuuming last night . . .’
Leah swallowed; could do nothing to stop the heat rushing up her neck and into her face.
‘I think it’s great, and he’s kinda hot, for an old bloke.’
‘I don’t think Alex’d be thrilled at being called old.’
‘Well, you know . . .’ Stacey said and looked even more embarrassed.
‘Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. And I’m —’ Leah paused, pressing a hand to her forehead. I’m scared I’m falling in love with him and there’s no future in it.
‘It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me anything. I’ve watched the way he looks at you,’ Stacey said, and Leah’s heart contracted at the wistful yearning in the girl’s voice. ‘He’s nice.’
What the hell. It’d be good to talk to someone. ‘It’s difficult, being here, with everyone watching what you do. And Alex being the boss,’ Leah said. She leaned against the cupboard. ‘I didn’t expect it to happen.’
‘Stuff always happens when we don’t expect it. Mum says that.’ Stacey unconsciously rubbed her belly where there was barely a bump.
‘Yeah,’ Leah said. Last night anything and everything had been possible. Today, not so much.
‘Maybe now you’ll be able to, like, start a family or something. You never know.’
Leah did know. There wouldn’t be any kids for her and Alex.
‘You’re younger than him, aren’t you?’
‘Not that many years behind him, and he already has kids, two boys. Twins. They’re teenagers and they live with their mother.’
‘Oh,’ Stacey said, her eyes wide with awe.
‘Alex and their mother are divorced,’ Leah added to stop any speculation before it started.
‘Right . . .’ Stacey said. ‘I’d better go. If Ben catches me here, I’m toast.’
‘Don’t worry. I’ll tell him you came to discuss women’s problems. He’d back off so fast!’
Stacey grinned. ‘You’re funny. I can understand why Mr McKinley likes you.’
‘Thanks, Stacey, I’ll catch you later. You take care.’
‘You too,’ Stacey said and backed out, closing the door behind her.
Bemused, Leah shook her head and returned the logbook to its drawer, surprised when there was another knock on the door moments later.
‘Only me again,’ Stacey said, hovering on the doorstep. ‘I meant to say before, Frank Ballard watches you as well, but in a different kind of way. He might look like George Clooney, but he is not a nice man, Leah. Be careful.’
‘Thanks. I will,’ Leah said, a cold shiver snaking down her spine. The seriousness in her tone and the look in Stacey’s eyes told Leah that the teenager had experience of men who weren’t nice.
Leah thought about this while she dipped the fuel and water tanks and replaced some signs around the camp, vandalised by drunken revellers. If Stacey had noticed the attraction and connection between her and Alex, maybe others had as well, including Frank.
If the word did get around, if Cameron Crawley got wind of it . . . Alarm jangled every nerve ending. Not only would there be no kids if this affair with Alex went on; Leah wouldn’t have a job either.
The remaining days before her leave went without incident. The project was at its peak, the accommodation full to bursting. Alex was talking about opening Camp Two a week ahead of schedule, and he’d been down to the site every other day, giving the contractors a hurry along.
Much to her regret – and, strangely, her relief – there’d been no repeat of their tryst in the office. Getting any time together alone was next to impossible. In one of those rare moments, after the daily debrief and before she went to dinner, Leah told him what Stacey had confided to her. He’d waggled his eyebrows and said, ‘Hmmm. She thinks I’m hot? What do you think?’
‘Her exact words were, “He’s kinda hot, for an old guy”. Of course I think you’re hot. Why else would I risk my job here?’
The words had extinguished the amusement dancing in Alex’s eyes. ‘You’re right,’ he’d said. ‘We’d better keep everything professional.’
Monday came and she packed her suitcase and tidied the room so it would be ready for Steve before she went to breakfast. Stacey had left a pile of clean linen and Leah changed the sheets and towels to help her out. The poor girl looked pale and seedy most mornings, though a smudge of colour had usually returned to her cheeks by lunchtime.
Alex had driven off immediately after pre start, out to address some problems with the steel supplied for several of the towers. Since their talk he’d been brusque and businesslike. They’d taken their meals separately, and there’d been no fraternising in the bar. It was for the best, but that didn’t mean Leah had to like it.
‘I’ll call you,’ he said before he left. Their office door was open, so all he did was smile and brush his knuckles across her cheek. Longing and despair dragged at her insides as she watched his vehicle disappear into the desert as the sun crested the horizon.
The plane that flew her home was much larger than the usual Piper Chieftain, and seated over twenty passengers as well as a co-pilot. The flight hadn’t taken as long, but embarking and disembarking took more time, and baggage collection was slower.
Leah was taken aback to find Paul waiting for her in the airport terminal.
‘This is an unexpected surprise,’ she said. ‘I could’ve taken a taxi.’
‘I was in the neighbourhood. And I needed to talk to you.’
Unease unfurled inside her as she took in his bloodshot eyes and crumpled appearance, the grey stubble on his usually clean-shaven chin. ‘What’s happened?’
‘Eve is in hospital.’
‘What? Is she all right? She sounded great last week. Why didn’t you say something on Friday?’
‘We can talk in the car,’ he said and pointed to a red suitcase. ‘That’s yours, isn’t it?’
They didn’t speak as she wheeled it out to the car park to his Lexus.
It was late in the afternoon; the air was crisply cold, the sky a translucent winter blue. Paul unlocked the vehicle and heaved her suitcase into the back.
Settled in the front, Leah turned to him and said, ‘Okay, tell me what’s going on. I know she had an appointment to see a GP?’
Paul peered in the rear-view mirror. ‘Christ, I need a shave. And a shower and a change of clothes. I’ve been at the hospital since late yesterday afternoon.’ He leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes.
‘I went into work Sunday lunchtime. Eve didn’t want me to. But the work was piling up because I’d taken a couple of days off during the week to go to the doctor with her, and to
be around. She’d been knocked back for another job.’ He sighed. Leah felt a prickle of fear at what was coming next.
‘When I got home I couldn’t rouse her. She’d been drinking, and she’d taken some pills. She was breathing but I guess I panicked and dialled triple zero.’
‘I’m sure you did the right thing.’ Leah pressed the heels of both hands against her closed eyes. ‘I take it that you’re here now because she’s recovering okay?’
He nodded. ‘She’s wide awake, the doctors are satisfied with her progress, and if her liver function tests are all right tomorrow, she’ll be able to go home. But she hasn’t said a word to me.’
‘Nothing?’
‘Nope. Not hello, not goodbye . . . nothing.’
‘Booze and pills. That is so not like Eve. Has she been drinking a lot?’
‘A few times I’ve come home and thought I could smell it on her. And then there was that one evening . . .’
Leah reached for his hand and held it between both of hers. The skin on the back of his hand was dry and covered with sunspots. Leah smoothed it with her fingers. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, because she didn’t know what else to say.
‘I tell her we’ll work through this, that I’ll take care of her, but she turns her head away and ignores me.’
‘How many pills had she taken? Do you think she was trying to kill herself?’
‘I honestly don’t know, Leah. I didn’t even know she had the sleeping tablets. I feel so stupid and useless.’
‘You’re neither. Do you want me to go to the hospital now, see if she’ll talk to me?’
‘Would you?’ he said and gripped her hand hard enough that it hurt.
‘Of course. What hospital is she in?’
He named one of the private hospitals close to the CBD.
‘You drop me off there and go home. I’ll see her and catch a taxi to your place.’
Paul drew the seatbelt over his shoulder and started the engine. ‘I’m sorry to do this to you, Leah. I know you’ve been up since five and must be exhausted.’
‘Don’t mention it. I’m glad I’m here now.’
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