by Monica James
“Baby—”
I can’t stop myself and slap his cheek—hard. The moment I do, I instantly regret it because this won’t be solved with violence. That’s why we’re in the position we’re in.
“You’re nothing but a liar.”
“Aye, that I am,” he replies, rubbing his cheek. “I didn’t want to tell ya ’cause yer better off without me. Trouble only follows me. I don’t want that for ya. I want ya to be happy. I want ya to be safe.”
“Oh, grow up!” I snap, not accepting his excuses. “I’m a grown-ass woman and can make my own choices. I don’t need protecting. This isn’t nineteen twenty. Chivalry is fucking sexist.”
Punky exhales loudly. “I fucked up, so I did. But yer happy with Rory, and I knew if I told ya the truth, ye’d—”
I chuckle, incredulous. “I’d what? Swoon at your feet? Follow you around like a lost little puppy? Please. Give me a little credit.”
“Ye can’t deny the attraction is still there. It never went away,” he states, which has a bubble of happiness floating to the surface. I soon pop it, infuriated.
“I was afraid if I told ya, I’d fuck up everything. Rory is my mate, and I didn’t want to hurt either of ya.”
“Are you even listening to yourself?” I question, arching a brow.
“Tell me y’ll go back to Rory, now that ya know the truth,” he challenges, but the joke’s on him.
“I left Rory before I found out the truth. Get over yourself, Puck Kelly!”
He takes a step back, speechless.
I stab my finger into my chest. “That choice was mine to make, not yours.”
I omit the fact that I left Rory because of my feelings for Punky as that isn’t the only reason. Rory is a wonderful man, and he’ll make some lucky girl happy one day, but that girl isn’t me.
“Ye broke off the engagement?” he asks softly.
In response, I hold up my ringless finger.
“Why? I thought Rory made ya happy. I don’t understand it.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t either,” I reply, but Punky doesn’t buy it. “It seems I’m happier on my own. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to fetch my things from the hotel.”
“Babydoll,” Punky says, reaching for me.
For the first time in my life, I recoil from his touch. “Don’t. Thank you for saving my life, but I am done. You should have told me the truth, and now, I don’t trust you.”
He lowers his eyes, my words wounding him.
I know I’m a hypocrite for being angry, as I lied to him once, but this is totally different. I lied because I didn’t have a choice, but he did. The ball is, and has always been, in Punky’s court.
Pushing past him, I grab a pair of his sweats and cuff them at the ankle since they’re about three sizes too long. I slip on my ruined T-shirt and Chucks and grab my leather backpack, which I’m thankful I still have.
“Baby, please don’t leave. Yer still hurt. I’ll go get yer things,” Punky says, walking into the bedroom.
“No,” I firmly state. “I need time to think. Away from you. I didn’t want to believe them, but to finally hear the truth come from you…I wish you really were my brother, so I could fucking stop loving you.”
A heavy sigh leaves him.
Not bothering with goodbyes—as we’ve had enough of those—I walk out the door and don’t look back. Sadly, the person in front of me isn’t any better.
“Hi,” Darcy says, getting out of her car.
“He’s all yours,” I reply, storming past her.
She doesn’t know what to say.
“Babydoll!” Punky screams, chasing after me.
But I don’t stop.
“Cami!”
He knows better than to touch me, so he runs in front of me, forcing me to stop as he blocks my path.
“Please don’t go. Let me explain.”
“The time to explain has come and gone. You made your choice, and this is me, making mine.”
I attempt to walk around him, but he stands his ground. “Y’ve always been my choice!” he cries, arms out wide. “I thought I was doin’ the right thing. I’m sorry.”
A part of me softens as I can read his sincerity. But the stubbornness within scolds me for being so weak. “Well, you thought wrong. I’m not some damsel in distress who needs rescuing.”
“I know that,” he counters angrily. “I just wanted ye to be happy. You and Rory. I can’t offer ya that.”
“Oh, enough! I’ve had it with your self-sacrifice bullshit,” I exclaim. “A man without friends is a man without power, and where I’m standing, you’re fucking powerless!”
“Ya don’t think I know that?” he barks, running a hand through his snarled hair. “Why do ya think I’m prepared to work with the man who killed my ma! The man who ruined my life.”
“There are other people who can and want to help,” I inform him. “But you’re so fucking stubborn and self-absorbed in your own shit, you won’t let anyone else in. I want to see Sean and Brody pay too. They fucked me over as well.
“They destroyed all our lives!”
My chest is heaving as I’m fuming.
Punky interlaces his hands behind his neck, clearly frustrated that I’m not submitting. “I know that, but it’s hard for me to ask this of ye. To put yer lives in danger for me.”
“You’re not asking, Punky. We want to help. You’re the one who doesn’t want it.”
“If anythin’ were to happen to any of youse, I’d never forgive myself,” he reveals, swallowing deeply. “I already failed Hannah and Ethan when I swore to protect them. They’re wains, Cami, and they’re messed up in shite that no one their age should be.”
“Hannah can handle herself,” I say, my anger simmering. “She was the one who got you out of jail. She and Darcy.”
Darcy is standing by her car, giving us privacy, which surprises me. I thought she’d be eager to be the shoulder for Punky to cry on.
“I know that. I’m just…fucking scared,” he confesses, surprising me. “Not for me, but for youse. What if I can’t stop Sean? What if all of this is for nothin’?”
To see Punky exposed is a rare thing. He wants to save and protect us all, but he can’t do that alone.
“This will never be for nothing,” I reply, meaning that in every way possible.
Punky nods, understanding the innuendo.
I’m about to tell him about my visit with Ron when my cell rings. Reaching into my backpack, I don’t recognize the number. I answer with dread.
“Hello?”
“Hi, sis.”
“Eva? Whose number are you calling from?”
“It’s my new number,” she replies. “Surprise! I’m here in Belfast.”
“What?” One word has never held more weight than it does right now. “Where’s Mom?”
“Back home. Can you come pick me up from the airport? Or I can catch a cab to where you are?”
“Why are you here?”
“I thought you’d be happy,” she says, saddened.
“I am, I just…What happened with Mom?” There is a reason she up and left without telling me because I would have never said yes to her coming here alone.
Punky listens closely, ready to spring to command if need be.
“Nothing, I just needed to get away. So can you come and get me?”
“Sure,” I reply, as I can hardly say no. “I’ll be there in twenty minutes. And, Eva, don’t get into a car with any strangers, okay?”
“Okay, Mom,” she teases, but little does she know the danger she’s put herself in by coming here.
I hang up, shaking my head in defeat. “I’ve got to pick my little sister up from the airport.”
“What? She’s here? Now?”
“Yes,” I reply, before quickly adding, “you don’t need to tell me what a bad idea this is. I know. I think she had a fight with my mom. She’s eighteen going on twenty-nine.”
“Is yer ma all right?”
“I thi
nk so, but I’ll find out the full story when I see Eva. I’ve got to go.”
“Of course,” Punky says. “Do ya want to take my truck?”
“No, it’s okay. I’ll catch a cab. If I turn up in your truck, Eva will ask questions, and I don’t have the energy to explain it to her right now.”
Punky nods, understanding that I mean she’ll ask where Rory is.
This conversation will have to be put on hold for now as I have yet another drama to deal with.
“Be careful,” he says with a sigh.
“I always am. You too. Are you seeing Brody today?” I know Punky, and he will want to strike as soon as possible.
He nods. “Aye. It’s time to set the rules.”
“Rules Brody will break.”
“Not if I break him first,” he counters quickly, and I know that he will.
I don’t know what to say, so I smile briefly before turning my back on him and walking away, hoping it’s for the last time. But I know better. Things with Punky and I have only just begun.
I watch Babydoll walk away with a lump in my throat as I can’t help but think she won’t be back.
I fucked up, so I did.
I thought I was doing the right thing, but I was so very wrong. I should have told Babydoll the truth as hearing it from her father and Sean was the worst possible way she could have found out. I hurt her, and she has every right to hate me.
I suppose whatever fate is headed my way, I’ll accept, as I’ve brought this onto myself.
“Bout ye, Darcy?” I ask as I walk up the drive.
“I’m sorry I didn’t call first,” she says, brushing a strand of hair behind her ears. “But I heard about The Craic’s 90. I wanted to make sure yer okay, but I can see that yer not.”
When she reaches out, attempting to examine the stitches across my eyebrow, I recoil. It’s a force of habit with anyone, bar Babydoll.
I don’t want to be rude to Darcy as she’s the reason I’m a free man. But I can only offer her friendship. “I’m fine. I’ve got to go, though. I’m sorry.”
Darcy pretends my brush-off doesn’t affect her and smiles. “That’s all right. Is there anything I can do to help?”
I’m about to tell her no when I get an idea.
“Do ya think ye’d be able to get information on the real estate Brody owns?”
Darcy smirks. “Absolutely. I’ll get it to you today.”
Another thought occurs. “What about abandoned properties? Or buildings which should be abandoned but yer da turns a blind eye to?”
Darcy nods. “Aye, I can get that organized for ya. Why would ya be wantin’ that?”
She is helping me, so I do owe her an explanation. “’Cause there’s someone besides Brody I’m huntin’,” I explain, not wanting to reveal too much. “I need to know if he’s using any of yer da’s buildings as his own personal headquarters.”
Sean is somewhere close. I know it. The best way to find out where he is, is by having a list of possible locations. I can’t wait for him to call Ronan with the next meeting details. I need to strike now.
“I’ll get everything over to ya as soon as I can,” Darcy says, knowing better than to press.
“Thanks. I really appreciate it. I don’t want to scare ya, but…be careful, will ya?”
“I don’t scare easy, but I will,” she replies, getting into her car. “I’ll be in touch once I have everythin’ ya asked for.”
Nodding, I watch as she starts the engine and descends the drive. Once she’s gone, I sigh as I’m already knackered, and it’s not even ten o’clock yet. My phone sounds, and I see it’s a text from Brody.
Noon. Come alone.
Ironically, I trust Brody because we want the same thing, but working with him kills me. To get what I want, I have to trust the man I hate just as much as Sean. But Brody is less dangerous. Sean has the ability to cause irreparable damage.
He already has.
Walking into my empty house, I send Hannah a text and bend to her wishes of decorating my home however she wishes. I don’t expect Babydoll to be back, but just in case.
Hannah texts back an array of happy emojis.
I know she’ll work her magic, and when I return, I won’t recognize the place.
I shower and get ready for my meeting with Brody, not that I can prepare for the unexpected. Even though I doubt I’ll need it, I reach into the chimney of the brick fireplace where I’ve hidden the bag of weapons and grab the flick knife.
Placing it into my boot, I leave my credit card for Hannah in the bedroom and lock up. She has her own key, so she can come over when she’s ready. Jumping into my truck, I commence the journey I never thought I’d travel again.
I’m on edge, checking my surroundings to ensure I’m not being followed. Sean’s ballsy attack proves he’s not afraid to make his motivations very public. But I think he’s laying low, waiting and watching to see how I respond to his attack.
I too am waiting as today’s meeting will determine the future.
The moment I turn down the deserted road, a flood of emotion overwhelms me. It was here, a new chapter commenced. It’s not changed much in the past ten years. I begin to think about the day that changed my life forever.
I would have done so many things differently, like not trust Sean. But he is a master manipulator, making me believe he actually gave a fuck about me. I wonder when my ma found this out for herself. I clench the steering wheel at the thought.
Her memory has faded over time, and I don’t know if the things I do recall are genuine memories or if it’s my mind making up accounts of her. But something that hasn’t faded is the need to avenge her, and at this moment, I realize it’s to avenge Connor as well.
He took his last breath here trying to protect me.
“Don’t trust…Sean.”
He went to the grave not privy to the fact that Sean is my real father. He believed it was Brody, or whoever else Sean brainwashed him into believing it could be. But something twigged at the last minute for him to use his last dying breath to utter those words.
It has me wondering if that’s why he left nothing to Sean in his will.
There is only one man who can answer that, and he’s the reason I pull up behind the black BMW parked on the side of the road. I don’t want to be here, making a deal with the devil, but he’s merely a means to an end—a bloody end where those who wronged me, and those I love, pay with their lives.
The door opens, and out limps a wounded Brody Doyle. The sight pleases me immensely.
He reaches into the car, and when he retrieves a cane, I smile. This fucker suffering is not even a sliver of what he deserves. But his karma is coming…
I exit the truck and meet Brody halfway as he continues hobbling along the gravel road. Folding my arms across my chest, I remain poker-faced because I can’t guarantee that both of us will be standing by the end of this conversation.
Brody’s dark sunglasses hide his eyes, but they don’t conceal the small red wounds all over his face. They’re too small to be stitched up, but they’re obvious enough for me to see he too suffered as I did. However, I thankfully don’t need a cane for assistance.
This has made Brody weak, something he no doubt hates.
“Is Camilla all right? She will not answer my calls,” he says, which surprises me because it sounds like he actually cares for her well-being.
“Do ya blame her?” I counter, shrugging. “All y’ve done is hurt her.”
“Ach, I know that,” he spits, angered. “But with two of my children now dead, she and Liam are all that I have left.”
“Ya should have thought about that before ye used her for yer own sick games.” I’m not touched by his newfound revelation. It shouldn’t take the deaths of his kids to realize this. Does he really think she’ll forgive him after everything he’s done?
He clenches his jaw but doesn’t retaliate.
“Yer dad is going to pay for what he’s done,” Brody promises, gripping t
he gold topper of his cane.
“Finally, somethin’ we agree on. Let’s hope it’s not too late.”
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means, for Sean to be able to blow up yer pub, he’s in deeper than I thought. It won’t be long until he takes ya down.”
Brody curls his lip, livid, but he knows I speak the truth. “So what do ya suggest I do?”
“First, yer goin’ to answer some questions, and yer goin’ to be honest.”
Brody reluctantly nods.
“Before Connor was killed, he said there was a deal made between ye? I want to know what it was.”
“We had a deal. Why would ya break it? Why now?”
That’s what Connor said to Brody before shit hit the fan. I want to know why Connor would make a deal with Brody. It’ll help me understand him better. It’ll also make me feel a little less guilty for doing the same thing.
“Connor came to me after yer ma…died.” He decides to use the less gruesome term, knowing I will rip out his tongue for the fact that she was murdered because of him. “He didn’t want any more bloodshed, so we made a deal—he would not seek retribution for Cara only if I promised to stay out of Belfast forever.
“Our families have been at war for generations, but Connor had power like no other Kelly we’d seen before. I knew if he found out the entire truth, he’d put an end to the Doyles for good. That’s why I agreed to help Sean deal with yer aul’ man.”
On instinct, I punch him straight in the jaw.
Brody’s head snaps back with a crack, and I rein in the urge to punch him again. “Don’t you dare speak so casually ’bout what ye did,” I warn, ensuring he knows my threat isn’t empty.
“Ya wanted the truth, so here it is,” he says, spitting out a mouthful of blood. “Connor would be fine with me fucking his wife, but if he knew I was workin’ with Sean, that would be unforgivable. Sean had that over me.
“But I agreed because I knew it would hurt Connor, and after he hurt my family for generations, I was more than happy to give him what he deserved.”
Clenching my fists, I take three calming breaths. I wanted the truth, and no matter how painful it is, I need to know it. “Why would ya trust Sean? He is a Kelly, after all.”