by Edward Albee
NURSE
You’re damned right!
FATHER
Go on! Go!
(The NURSE regards him for a moment; turns, exits)
And don’t stay out there all night in his car, when you get back. You hear me? (Pause) You hear me?
(Lights fade on this scene; come up on)
SCENE THREE
A bare area. JACK enters, addresses his remarks off stage and to an invisible mirror on an invisible dresser. Music under this scene, as though coming from a distance.
JACK
Hey … Bessie! C’mon, now. Hey … honey? Get your butt out of bed … wake up. C’mon; the goddamn afternoon’s half gone; we gotta get movin’. Hey … I called that son-of-a-bitch in New York … I told him, all right. I told him what you said. Wake up, baby, we gotta get out of this dump; I gotta get you to Memphis ’fore seven o’clock … and then … POW! … we are headin’ straight north. Here we come; NEW YORK. I told that bastard … I said: Look, you don’t have no exclusive rights on Bessie … nobody’s got ’em … Bessie is doin’ you a favor … she’s doin’ you a goddamn favor. She don’t have to sing for you. I said: Bessie’s tired … she don’t wanna travel now. An’ he said: You don’t wanna back out of this … Bessie told me herself … and I said: Look … don’t worry yourself … Bessie said she’d cut more sides for you … she will … she’ll make all the goddamn new records you want. … What I mean to say is, just don’t you get any ideas about havin’ exclusive rights … because nobody’s got ’em. (Giggles) I told him you was free as a bird, honey. Free as a goddamn bird. (Looks in at her, shakes his head) Some bird! I been downstairs to check us out. I go downstairs to check us out, and I run into a friend of mine … and we sit in the bar and have a few, and he says: What’re you doin’ now; what’re you doin’ in this crummy hotel? And I say: I am cartin’ a bird around with me. I’m cartin’ her north; I got a fat lady upstairs; she is sleepin’ off last night. An’ he says: You always got some fat lady upstairs, somewhere; boy, I never seen it fail. An’ I say: This ain’t just no plain fat lady I got upstairs … this is a celebrity, boy … this is a rich old fat singin’ lady … an’ he laughed an’ he said: Boy, who you got up there? I say: You guess. An’ he says: C’mon … I can’t guess. An’ I told him … I am travelin’ with Miss Bessie Smith. An’ he looked at me, an’ he said, real quiet: Jesus, boy, are you travelin’ with Bessie? An’ I said … an’ real proud: You’re damn right I’m travelin’ with Bessie. An’ he wants to meet you; so you get your big self out of bed; we’re goin’ to go downstairs, ’cause I wanna show you off. C’mon, now; I mean I gotta show you off. ’Cause then he said: Whatever happened to Bessie? An’ I said: What do you mean, whatever happened to Bessie? She’s right upstairs. An’ he said: I mean, what’s she been doin’ the past four-five years? There was a time there, boy, Chicago an’ all, New York, she was the hottest goddamn thing goin’. Is she still singin’? YOU HEAR THAT? That’s what he said: Is she still singin’? An’ I said … I said, you been tired … you been restin’. You ain’t been forgotten, honey, but they are askin’ questions. SO YOU GET UP! We’re drivin’ north tonight, an’ when you get in New York … you show ’em where you been. Honey, you’re gonna go back on top again … I mean it … you are. I’m gonna get you up to New York. ’Cause you gotta make that date. I mean, sure, baby, you’re free as a goddamn bird, an’ I did tell that son-of-a-bitch he don’t have exclusive rights on you … but, honey … he is interested … an’ you gotta hustle for it now. You do; ‘cause if you don’t do somethin’, people are gonna stop askin’ where you been the past four-five years … they’re gonna stop askin’ anything at all! You hear? An’ if I say downstairs you’re rich … that don’t make it so, Bessie. No more, honey. You gotta make this goddamn trip … you gotta get goin’ again. (Pleading) Baby? Honey? You know I’m not lyin’ to you. C’mon now; get up. We go downstairs to the bar an’ have a few … see my friend … an’ then we’ll get in that car … and go. ‘Cause it’s gettin’ late, honey … it’s gettin’ awful late. (Brighter) Hey! You awake? (Moving to the wings) Well, c’mon, then, Bessie … let’s get up. We’re goin’ north again!
(The lights fade on this scene.
Music.
The sunset is predominant)
JACK’S VOICE
Ha, ha; thanks; thanks a lot. (Car door slams. Car motor starts) O.K.; here we go; we’re on our way. (Sound of car motor gunning, car moving off, fading)
(The sunset dims again.
Music, fading, as the lights come up on)
SCENE FOUR
The admissions room of the hospital. The NURSE is at her desk; the ORDERLY stands to one side.
ORDERLY
The mayor of Memphis! I went into his room and there he was; the mayor of Memphis. Lying right there, flat on his belly … a cigar in his mouth … an unlit cigar stuck in his mouth, chewing on it, chewing on a big, unlit cigar … shuffling a lot of papers in his hands, a pillow shoved up under his chest to give him some freedom for all those papers … and I came in, and I said: Good afternoon, Your Honor … and he swung his face ’round and he looked at me and he shouted: My ass hurts, you get the hell out of here!
NURSE (Laughs freely)
His Honor has got his ass in a sling, and that’s for sure.
ORDERLY
And I got out; I left very quickly; I closed the door fast.
NURSE
The mayor and his hemorrhoids … the mayor’s late hemorrhoids … are a matter of deep concern to this institution, for the mayor built this hospital; the mayor is here with his ass in a sling, and the seat of government is now in Room 206 … so you be nice and respectful. (Laughs) There is a man two rooms down who walked in here last night after you went off … that man walked in here with his hands over his gut to keep his insides from spilling right out on this desk …
ORDERLY
I heard. …
NURSE
… and that man may live, or he may not live, and the wagers are heavy that he will not live … but we are not one bit more concerned for that man than we are for His Honor … no sir.
ORDERLY (Chuckling)
I like your contempt.
NURSE
You what? You like my contempt, do you? Well now, don’t misunderstand me. Just what do you think I meant? What have you got it in your mind that I was saying?
ORDERLY
Why, it’s a matter of proportion. Surely you don’t condone the fact that the mayor and his piles, and that poor man lying up there …?
NURSE
Condone! Will you listen to that: condone! My! Aren’t you the educated one? What … what does that word mean, boy? That word condone? Hunh? You do talk some, don’t you? You have a great deal to learn. Now it’s true that the poor man lying up there with his guts coming out could be a Nigger for all the attention he’d get if His Honor should start shouting for something … he could be on the operating table … and they’d drop his insides right on the floor and come running if the mayor should want his cigar lit. … But that is the way things are. Those are facts. You had better acquaint yourself with some realities.
ORDERLY
I know … I know the mayor is an important man. He is impressive … even lying on his belly like he is. … I’d like to get to talk to him.
NURSE
Don’t you know it! TALK to him! Talk to the mayor? What for?
ORDERLY
I’ve told you. I’ve told you I don’t intend to stay here carrying crap pans and washing out the operating theatre until I have a … a long gray beard … I’m … I’m going beyond that.
NURSE (Patronizing)
Sure.
ORDERLY
I’ve told you … I’m going beyond that. This …
NURSE
(Shakes her head in amused disbelief) Oh, my. Listen … you should count yourself lucky, boy. Just what do you think is going to happen to you? Is His Honor, the mayor, going to rise up out of his sickbed and take a per
sonal interest in you? Write a letter to the President, maybe? And is Mr. Roosevelt going to send his wife, Lady Eleanor, down here after you? Or is it in your plans that you are going to be handed a big fat scholarship somewhere to the north of Johns Hopkins? Boy, you just don’t know! I’ll tell you something … you are lucky as you are. Whatever do you expect?
ORDERLY
What’s been promised. … Nothing more. Just that.
NURSE
Promised! Promised? Oh, boy, I’ll tell you about promises. Don’t you know yet that everything is promises … and that is all there is to it? Promises … nothing more! I am personally sick of promises. Would you like to hear a little poem? Would you like me to recite some verse for you? Here is a little poem: “You kiss the Niggers and I’ll kiss the Jews and we’ll stay in the White House as long as we choose.” And that … according to what I am told … that is what Mr. and Mrs. Roosevelt sit at the breakfast table and sing to each other over their orange juice, right in the White House. Promises, boy! Promises … and that is what they are going to stay.
ORDERLY
There are some people who believe in more than promises. …
NURSE
Hunh?
ORDERLY (Cautious now)
I say, there are some people who believe in more than promises; there are some people who believe in action.
NURSE
What’s that? What did you say?
ORDERLY
Action … ac— … Never mind.
NURSE (Her eyes narrow)
No … no, go on now … action? What kind of action do you mean?
ORDERLY
I don’t mean anything … all I said was …
NURSE
I heard you. You know … I know what you been doing. You been listening to the great white doctor again … that big, good-looking blond intern you admire so much because he is so liberal-thinking, eh? My suitor? (Laughs) My suitor … my very own white knight, who is wasting his time patching up decent folk right here when there is dying going on in Spain. (Exaggerated) Oh, there is dying in Spain. And he is held here! That’s who you have been listening to.
ORDERLY
I don’t mean that. … I don’t pay any attention … (Weakly) to that kind of talk. I do my job here … I try to keep …
NURSE (Contemptuous)
You try to keep yourself on the good side of everybody, don’t you, boy? You stand there and you nod your kinky little head and say yes’m, yes’m, at everything I say, and then when he’s here you go off in a corner and you get him and you sympathize with him … you get him to tell you about … promises! … and … and … action! … I’ll tell you right now, he’s going to get himself into trouble … and you’re helping him right along.
ORDERLY
No, now. I don’t …
NURSE (With some disgust)
All that talk of his! Action! I know all what he talks about … like about that bunch of radicals came through here last spring … causing the rioting … that arson! Stuff like that. Didn’t … didn’t you have someone get banged up in that?
ORDERLY (Contained)
My uncle got run down by a lorry full of state police …
NURSE
… which the Governor called out because of the rioting … and that arson! Action! That was a fine bunch of action. Is that what you mean? Is that what you get him off in a corner and get him to talk about … and pretend you’re interested? Listen, boy … if you’re going to get yourself in with those folks, you’d better …
ORDERLY (Quickly)
I’m not mixed up with any folks … honestly … I’m not. I just want to …
NURSE
I’ll tell you what you just want. … I’ll tell you what you just want if you have any mind to keep this good job you’ve got. … You just shut your ears … and you keep that mouth closed tight, too. All this talk about what you are going to go beyond! You keep walking a real tight line here, and … and at night … (She begins to giggle) … and at night, if you want to, on your own time … at night you keep right on putting that bleach on your hands and your neck and your face …
ORDERLY
I do no such thing!
NURSE (In full laughter)
… and you keep right on bleaching away … b-l-e-a-c-h-i-n-g a-w-a-y … but you do that on your own time … you can do all that on your own time.
ORDERLY (Pleading)
I do no such thing!
NURSE
The hell you don’t! You are such a …
ORDERLY
That kind of talk is very …
NURSE
… you are so mixed up! You are going to be one funny sight. You, over there in a corner playing up to him … well, boy, you are going to be one funny sight come the millennium. … The great black mob marching down the street, banners in the air … that great black mob … and you right there in the middle, your bleached-out, snowy-white face in the middle of the pack like that … (She breaks down in laughter) … oh … oh, my … oh. I tell you, that will be quite a sight.
ORDERLY (Plaintive)
I wish you’d stop that.
NURSE
Quite a sight.
ORDERLY
I wish you wouldn’t make fun of me … I don’t give you any cause.
NURSE
Oh, my … oh, I am sorry … I am so sorry.
ORDERLY
I don’t think I give you any cause. …
NURSE
You don’t, eh?
ORDERLY
No.
NURSE
Well … you are a true little gentleman, that’s for sure … you are polite … and deferential … and you are a genuine little ass-licker, if I ever saw one. Tell me, boy …
ORDERLY
(Stiffening a little) There is no need …
NURSE
(Maliciously solicitous) Tell me, boy … is it true that you have Uncle Tom’d yourself right out of the bosom of your family … right out of your circle of acquaintances? Is it true, young man, that you are now an inhabitant of no-man’s-land, on the one side shunned and disowned by your brethren, and on the other an object of contempt and derision to your betters? Is that your problem, son?
ORDERLY
You … you shouldn’t do that. I … work hard … I try to advance myself … I give nobody trouble.
NURSE
I’ll tell you what you do. … You go north, boy … you go up to New York City, where nobody’s any better than anybody else … get up north, boy. (Abrupt change of tone) But before you do anything like that, you run on downstairs and get me a pack of cigarettes.
ORDERLY
(Pauses. Is about to speak; thinks better of it; moves off to door, rear) Yes’m.
(Exits)
NURSE
(Watches him leave. After he is gone, shakes her head, laughs, parodies him)
Yes’m … yes’m … ha, ha, ha! You white Niggers kill me.
(She picks up her desk phone, dials a number, as the lights come up on)
SCENE FIVE
Which is both the hospital set of the preceding scene and, as well, on the raised platform, another admissions desk of another hospital. The desk is empty. The phone rings, twice. The SECOND NURSE comes in, slowly, filing her nails, maybe.
SECOND NURSE
(Lazily answering the phone) Mercy Hospital.
NURSE
Mercy Hospital! Mercy, indeed, you away from your desk all the time. Some hospitals are run better than others; some nurses stay at their posts.
SECOND NURSE (Bored)
Oh, hi. What do you want?
NURSE
I don’t want anything. …
SECOND NURSE
(Pause) Oh. Well, what did you call for?
NURSE
I didn’t call for anything. I (Shrugs) just called.
SECOND NURSE
Oh.
(The lights dim a little on the two nurses. Music. Car sounds up)
JACK’S VO
ICE
(Laughs) I tell you, honey, he didn’t like that. No, sir, he didn’t. You comfortable, honey. Hunh? You just lean back and enjoy the ride, baby; we’re makin’ good time. Yes, we are makin’ … WATCH OUT! WATCH …
(Sound of crash. … Silence)
Honey … baby … we have crashed … you all right? … BESSIE! BESSIE!
(Music up again, fading as the lights come up full again on the two nurses)
NURSE
… and, what else? Oh, yeah; we have got the mayor here.
SECOND NURSE
That’s nice. What’s he doin’?
NURSE
He isn’t doin’ anything; he is a patient here.
SECOND NURSE
Oh. Well, we had the mayor’s wife here … last April.
NURSE
Unh-hunh. Well, we got the mayor here, now.
SECOND NURSE (Very bored)
Unh-hunh. Well, that’s nice.
NURSE
(Turns, sees the INTERN entering) Oh, lover-boy just walked in; I’ll call you later, hunh?
SECOND NURSE
Unh-hunh.
(They both hang up. The lights fade on the SECOND NURSE)
SCENE SIX
NURSE
Well, how is the Great White Doctor this evening?
INTERN (Irritable)
Oh … drop it.
NURSE
Oh, my … where is your cheerful demeanor this evening, Doctor?
INTERN
(Smiling in spite of himself) How do you do it? How do you manage to just dismiss things from your mind? How can you say a … cheerful hello to someone … dismissing from your mind … excusing yourself for the vile things you have said the evening before?
NURSE (Lightly)
I said nothing vile. I put you in your place … that’s all. I … I merely put you in your place … as I have done before … and as I shall do again.
INTERN
(Is about to say something; thinks better of it; sighs) Never mind … forget about it … Did you see the sunset?
NURSE (Mimicking)
No, I didn’t see the sunset. What is it doing?
INTERN
(Amused. Puts it on heavily) The west is burning … fire has enveloped fully half of the continent … the … the fingers of the flame stretch upward to the stars … and … and there is a monstrous burning circumference hanging on the edge of the world.