by Jacqui Penn
Where the River Ends
Jacqui Penn
Contents
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Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Also by Jacqui Penn
About Jacqui
Copyright © Jacqui Penn
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Prologue
1985
Her father spoke as though she wasn’t there. Sophia felt the humility burning through her body like a red-hot poker. She stood a few feet away from them, next to a figurine of Mary holding her infant son on a white-clothed table. The small, bare room mirrored Sophia’s emptiness.
She watched as her father swept back his dark hair, wiped his hand across his mouth and down to his chin. ‘It’s been a difficult time, sister. Her mother died in childbirth. She’s always been an awkward child, but standing by and doing nothing while her sister died… Well, you can imagine…’ He lowered his head.
The nun nodded and looked briefly at Sophia then back to her father. ‘I can see you’ve all been through hard times. We’ll take good care of her until you’re ready. A bit of space and time will do you all the world of good. God be with you.’
‘Thank you, sister, I’m very grateful for your help.’ Anthony Wallace turned without a glance in Sophia’s direction and walked to the door which slammed shut behind him.
Sophia could feel the tears welling up and quickly tried to blink them away. A sob juddered in her chest and for the first time, she felt an intense hatred towards her father. Until now she had felt compassion for his loss and could empathise with his sorrow.
Sister Jude rubbed her hands together and smiled warmly. ‘Come along then, bring your bag and I’ll show you to your bed.’
Sophia walked a couple of paces behind the well-rounded bottom swaying from side to side beneath the wide black dress. The corridors echoed a silence with only the sound of their feet breaking into the tranquillity. The walls were pale green and the floor covered with a dark, brown linoleum. Was she the only child who would be living here amongst the nuns? How long would it be before her father returned for her? She hadn’t stood by and done nothing when Kara died; she tried to pull her out of the river, but Kara’s dress had been tangled on a branch.
They often went to the river on a Saturday afternoon. Their dad always returned from the pub around two o’clock and ushered the girls out to play. Sometimes they would go to the park, but that fateful day had been sunny so they decided to play by the river.
Kara climbed up a tree on the riverbank and swung her legs. ‘Look at me, bet you can’t climb up here.’
‘I don’t want to, you know I don’t like heights. You’d better get down before you fall.’
‘Scaredy cat, scaredy cat, what do you think you’re looking at?’ Kara sang out as loudly as she could before giving the little giggle she always did when she knew she could do something better than her elder sister. Her piercing scream echoed around the river as the branch broke and sent her crashing down into the river. Somehow the branch twisted and Kara became trapped underneath. Sophia jumped into the water and tried in vain to free her sister. She pulled frantically at the branch and grabbed a limp leg to no avail. Kara needed help. Hauling herself onto the bank Sophia began to scream. She ran up towards the tow-path where several people dashed towards her.
‘My sister is trapped; the branch broke.’ She fell to the ground and woke to a woman holding her tightly.
‘It’s alright. I’m keeping you warm. The ambulance is on its way.’
Sophia struggled to get up. ‘Kara. Where’s Kara?’
‘Shh. Stay here, they’re doing what they can.’ The woman looked at Sophia with a look of sympathy and Sophia could see by the woman’s expression that she’d lost her sister.
‘They must be able to save her. Tell them… Tell them it’s my sister…’ The woman rocked her back and forth as Sophia’s tears flooded uncontrollably and she screamed like a pained animal. ‘I should have been looking after her… I shouldn’t have let her climb the tree…’
‘It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have done anything.’ The woman’s kind tone bit through Sophia like a knife. She didn’t deserve kindness. She should have looked after Kara.
The sirens roared through the daze of Sophia’s mind as she was wrapped in blankets and lifted into an ambulance. She could see firemen and police arriving as she watched through the open ambulance doors.
A woman climbed the steps and crouched down beside her. ‘I’m Louise and I work for the police. I’m here to help you. What’s your name?’
‘Sophia Wallace. Where’s Kara?’
‘Is Kara your friend?’
‘My sister.’
‘Okay. Can you tell me your address?’
‘32, Hamilton Road, Sandwich.’
Louise turned and repeated the name and the address to a policeman standing at the ambulance door before taking Sophia’s hand. ‘Sophia, can you tell me what happened?’
‘Kara was up the tree laughing because she could climb trees and I can’t. Then the branch broke and she fell into the river. I tried to get her out, but the branch was too heavy; I couldn’t pull her out…’ Sophia sobbed into Louise’s arms.
Louise held her. ‘The ambulance is taking you to the hospital. I’m going to come with you.’
‘What about Kara? She’s dead, isn’t she? I couldn’t pull her out.’
‘You did everything you could. They’re getting in touch with your mum and dad.’
Sophia shuddered a tearful sob. ‘I haven’t got a mum. She died when she had me.’
‘So is it just your dad at home looking after you and your sister?’
‘Dad and step-mum. They hate me.’
‘No one hates you. This was an accident.’ Louise leaned to one side holding Sophia’s hand as a medic rubbed some ointment on Sophia’s arm before administering medication. She soon drifted to sleep.
They all said it had been an accident, but now her dad had told the nun she did nothing to try and save her sister. He lied, and now everyone at the convent would hate her as well.
Sister Jude opened a door and Sophia saw a dormitory with six beds spaced evenly along each side of the room. Identical wooden cabinets stood next to every bed, but they were all bare of ornaments or photos like Sophia had on her bedside table at home. On the other side of each bed was a single wardrobe. Effigies of Jesus and Mary hung on the walls, alon
g with pictures of country scenes.
Sister Jude walked ahead then spread the palm of her hand over the top cover of a bed at the far end of the dormitory. ‘This will be your bed. The others are at school; they’ll be back by four. I’ll leave you to unpack. Is there anything you need?’
‘No, thank you.’
The door swung closed on an automatic hinge and an emptiness came over Sophia as she looked around her home for the foreseeable future. Would her father ever come back to collect her? She hoisted her small bag up onto the bed and undid the zip. She stood the photo of Kara facing her bed so as always she would be the first person Sophia saw each morning. She ran her finger over the outline of her sister’s smiling face.
‘You know they sent Bounder away. I don’t know where he went. They said he was your dog and they couldn’t bear him to be there without you. I have to stay here now because they can’t stand me either. I wish we’d both been on the branch that day; at least we’d have each other. Kara, I’m frightened on my own.’ She bent back over the bag and pulled out her picture of Bounder leaping in the air after a ball. She kissed it and stood it on the cabinet alongside her sister.
The wardrobe had three drawers at the bottom. Sophia unpacked her meagre belongings and sat on the edge of her bed. The large clock on the far end wall above the door read ten minutes to four. She took a deep breath and hoped she would fit in with the other children here; it couldn’t be worse than it had been at home for the past four months.
She cast her mind back to events before the accident, things hadn’t been good then either. Kara had always been the favourite. As far back as she could remember, Jean, her step mum, had been horrible to Sophia. She would turn events around to make it sound like Sophia had been cheeky or rude, and if Sophia tried to argue she would receive an extra lash with the belt for arguing. Sophia had a feeling that her dad didn’t like hitting her, but Jean demanded his daughter be reprimanded. She could never recall Kara being chastised with the belt.
The door burst open and a multitude of girls from around eight years of age to maybe fourteen charged into the room chattering and laughing.
A tall, short-haired, blonde girl looked at her and walked over. ‘Hello Newbie, what’s your name?’
‘Sophia.’
The girl let out a loud, exaggerated snort. ‘Sophia! What sort of name is that?’
‘My grandmother’s name was Sophie. My mum’s dying wish was that I should be named after her.’
The girl looked taken aback and nodded. ‘Welcome to your new home, Sophia.’ She threw her school bag on the next bed along from Sophia’s. ‘Looks like we’re going to be neighbours. You’ll get along alright here, the foods not bad, and nor are some of the nuns.’
‘I’m only here for a little while.’
‘Ha!’ She threw her head back. ‘That’s what we were all told and then they don’t come back for you.’
Sophia thought for a moment. ‘My step-mother wouldn’t want me back and I don’t suppose that will leave my dad much option. I might be here forever.’
The girl smiled. ‘Join the club, I’m not going anywhere either. I’m Anna.’
Sophia smiled back. ‘Pleased to meet you.’
Some of the other girls had crowded around the end of Sophia’s bed and one by one they introduced themselves. They seemed like a nice group of girls and Sophia soon found herself relaxing a bit.
A clapping of hands sounded, and the girls hurried back to the end of their own beds and stood almost to attention as a nun waited by the open door. ‘Homework!’ The girls grabbed their bags and headed for the door. The nun looked over the rim of her glasses at Sophia. ‘Where are your books? Oh, you must be our new girl. You might as well join us. Come along, today would be nice.’ Sophia hurried after her. ‘You’ll be going to your new school tomorrow.’
Sophia gulped. ‘New school? Can’t I stay at my old one?’
‘No dear, it’s too far away. Someone should have told you.’
Sophia felt a lump rise in her throat. Now she didn’t even have her old school friends. She had no one in the whole world. She blinked back her tears; it wouldn’t do to be caught crying like a baby at eleven-years-old.
Chapter 1
Seven years later
Sophia stood outside her childhood home staring. She no longer recognised the cladded walls and crisp white paintwork which was her family home until she turned eleven. Her sensible head told her not to bother knocking on the door, while her strong will told her she had nothing to be ashamed of. There were some things she needed to get off her chest once and for all. She pulled the brass knocker back and banged it twice. She cleared her throat and looked up the once familiar street. A door shut somewhere inside the house. Sophia turned back and focused on the brass number thirty-two. She tapped her leg as the footsteps approached. Her heart gave a nervous shudder and her breathing quickened.
An unfamiliar woman with rollers in her hair scowled. ‘I don’t want whatever it is you’re selling, thanks very much.’ She began to close the door.
Sophia put her hand on the door. ‘I’m not selling anything. I’m looking for someone who used to live here. Anthony Wallace.’
‘Wallace. Yes, I’m sure that’s who we bought from. No idea where they moved to, but I’d like to give them a piece of my mind. Took all the light bulbs, and carpets we’d paid them for. The solicitors couldn’t do a thing as it had been a private arrangement.’
Sophia felt her chest tighten. ‘Sorry to have bothered you.’ She turned away.
‘Friends of yours were they? You’re better off without that sort of scum.’ The door banged shut.
Sophia didn’t look back. Scum! She liked that description. Why had she expected her father to be waiting for her? Although she had rash ideas of venting her anger at him for making her live in a home for the past seven years, deep down she had some romantic notion he might be pleased to see her and say how wrong he’d been. He’d take her in his arms and beg her forgiveness. Now she felt let down all over again. She should never have come back to Sandwich.
She walked into the town, not much had changed. Still, the little cobbled streets and quaint shops charging a bit too much. Sophia hesitated at the river. Bad memories flooded back.
She looked along the tow-path. In one direction she could walk along the tow-path while in the other she’d come across the tree. On impulse, she walked back through the high street and went into a florist shop, where she bought a small bunch of flowers. She returned to the river and took the path leading to the tree and stood to stare for a few minutes before venturing to the water’s edge.
The tree, although it must have grown, now looked smaller than she remembered with no visible signs of the tragedy. Sophia didn’t really know what she’d expected. Of course, in the years gone by, the tree had flourished hiding all traces of a branch breaking. As she walked closer to the bank, Sophia could see the branches overhanging the river had been cut. She gave a small sigh and picked a couple of flowers from the bunch which she threw into the water. The flow quickly took them downstream and they disappeared out of sight. How different life would have been if only they’d chosen the park that day.
Somehow the river looked different with many more boats moored up than there used to be; two deep in some places. The riverbank held a silence Sophia hadn’t expected. During the past years, she’d remembered it as a place of panic and fear, with sirens sounding out. A high pitched yapping caught her attention as a tiny dog ran towards her stopping about two feet from her legs.
‘Hello, aren’t you cute? Where have you come from?’ She looked in the direction the dog had come from but saw no one. The dog sat down and looked up at her expectantly. ‘What? I haven’t got anything for you. You’d better be getting off home; someone will be missing you.’ The statement brought a lump to Sophia’s throat as she realised that no one would ever miss her. ‘Go on. Shoo!’ She clapped her hands. The dog, a small version of a Yorkshire terrier, shuffled its front
paws and stayed put, still staring up hopefully. ‘I’m going now. Nice to have met you,’ Sophia said.
She turned and walked back along the river’s edge, deciding not to look around as the dog might be encouraged to follow. Reaching the road, and about to cross, Sophia’s eyes were drawn to the small bundle who had sat beside her as she waited for the traffic. ‘I can’t take you with me, I’m not allowed pets.’ Oh no! What was she going to do now? Police station. They’d know what to do. She picked up the dog, tucked it into her jacket and marched down the road.
‘The pound gives them two weeks for the owners to come forward,’ she was told bluntly by the policewoman behind the counter after an hour-long wait.
‘And what happens after two weeks?’
‘I think they’re sent to the dog’s home, but there are loads of them. They can’t take them all.’
Sophia looked down at the hopeful eyes staring back at her and knew she couldn’t leave him there. ‘Okay. I’ll leave my address with you. Someone’s bound to report him missing; I think he’s a pedigree.’
The policewoman pulled a pad forward and passed it under the glass. ‘Name, address and telephone number along with a description and where you found it. Next.’
Sophia searched in her bag. ‘Do you have a pen I could borrow?’ The woman slid one under the glass. ‘I’ll have it back when you’ve finished.’ Sophia nodded. She had become used to not being trusted at the home; the nuns always seemed to be on the lookout for some wrongdoing or stealing.
She left the police station and headed for the cemetery; another place which had changed over the years. Eventually, she found her sister’s headstone which looked as though it hadn’t been visited for ages. She hesitated, tears welling. ‘Sorry I haven’t been for years, they moved me to a kid’s home, St Mary’s in Rochester. I bought some flowers. I still have your photo; it’s next to my bed every night. Still miss you, sis.’ She blinked away the tears, then gave in and wiped her eyes on the back of her hand. ‘Oh, this is Mutley, he found me down by the river. I’ve got an interview on Monday, in Canterbury, I live there now. The kid’s home chuck you out as a closed case when you get to eighteen. I’ll come and visit again.’ She walked away with Mutley at her heels and headed for the railway station.