by Amy DeMeritt
Janae wipes a tear out of her right eye and sits up straighter to kiss my lips. She clinks glasses with me, and we shoot back the whiskey.
“Five more months and it will be three years since she passed away. Sometimes, it feels like it was just yesterday that I was sitting in her kitchen eating her famous lemon Bundt cake with her and listening to her tell me stories of her childhood.”
“I miss her too, babe. What would you like to do on the anniversary of her taking her next journey?”
“I definitely want to visit her grave again. When we go visit my parents, I think I’ll make her lemon Bundt cake. Will you spend the whole day with me?”
“You know I will.” I caress her soft smooth cocoa cheek and trace her round ear with my thumb. “I love you, Janae. You know that, right?”
“Yes. I love you too, Jack. Come here.”
She pulls my face down to hers and she kisses my lips. She holds it for several moments, but she doesn’t part her lips to give me a full kiss, like I wish she would.
“Grab the beers. Let’s go find another movie before the food gets here.”
“Janae?”
“Yes, honey?”
“Never mind.”
I turn to grab the beers, but she pulls me back and wraps her arms around my waist.
“Jack, what’s up?”
“I was talking to Carrie yesterday about her issues, and she made a comment about me tossing women away when I’m done with them.” Janae’s face pinches in anger, and she pulls me in tighter. “But I don’t do that. I mean, I’ve had to cut some off because they started to get too attached, or they contracted something from another partner. But I always let them decide when it ends. I never thought about it before, but a lot of women have walked away from me. I mean, a lot. I guess, I just… I don’t know how to say what I’m feeling.”
“Jack, I’m never leaving.” My eyes tear up, and Janae gives me a loving smile as she pulls me down to rest my head on her shoulder. “I love you, Jack. I promise, I will always be by your side.”
“I love you too. I’ve never loved anyone like I love you.”
“I know, honey. I feel the same way.”
“I want you to stay with me tonight.”
“Ok, honey. Come hold me on the couch.”
Chapter Thirteen
I kick my shorts and underwear off as I rip my sports bra off, then I dive into the deep end of my huge in-ground pool. I swim along the bottom of the pool like a frog till I reach the wall of the shallow end, then shoot up to catch my breath. I shake my hair out of eyes and slick it back.
It’s such a beautiful day. The sun is high, straight above me at the twelve o’clock position. The bright blue sky is streaked with fine white lines like a blue and white zebra. And the temperature is a perfect eighty-five degrees.
I float onto my back and just drift in the water like a person lost at sea without a boat or a raft. I close my eyes and just enjoy the hot sun kissing my naked body and the cool water gently licking up my sides. It feels really nice.
This has been a pretty long week so I really need this. I have an outside company do quarterly audits on each department in my company to ensure everything is being done properly. They found some discrepancies with my upper management and some of the client relations team’s processes. I had to go in and address the issues, which resulted in needing to fire three individuals. I hate having to fire people, but it was necessary. They were manipulating numbers and clients to increase their bonuses.
I’m pretty hands off with my company for the most part because I worked hard in building a staff I can trust and who are experts in their fields. When someone breaks my trust, I take it very personally. I pay my staff twenty percent above the national average for their position, in addition to offering bonuses to each employee – not just my sales team. Plus, they receive a bunch of different perks that other companies don’t offer at all. Having someone take advantage of me like that just really ticks me off.
“Oh, my god, Jack!”
Before I can open my eyes and react, I’m shoved under water. Two arms wrap around me and scoop me up, lifting me above water. I gasp for air, and wipe water out of my eyes.
“Carrie, what the hell?”
“Jack, you’re alive! I thought you were dead.”
She wraps her arms around me and starts crying against my neck. I return her embrace and run a hand over her hair, trying to comfort her.
“Carrie, calm down. I’m fine. I was just trying to relax.”
“I thought you were dead. You didn’t look like you were breathing. I’ve never been so scared before.”
“I’m sorry.”
She lifts her head off of my shoulder, and as soon as her eyes lock with mine, she starts crying hard again. She tightens her arms and sobs against the side of my neck.
“Jack, don’t ever scare me like that again. I can’t lose you.”
My eyes sting with emotion from the unexpected depth of attachment she has towards me. I really just thought she sort of tolerated me because she needs someplace to stay and she doesn’t know many people out here.
“Come on, let’s get out and get a drink.”
She looks up at me with tears still fresh in her eyes and nods once as she sniffles and pulls her arms back to wipe her eyes. She looks down at my naked body, but then quickly looks away.
“Jack, you’re naked. Why are you naked?”
“It’s the best way to swim. It feels great and I don’t have to worry about weird tan lines.”
“Well, can you get out and put something on to cover up?”
I laugh a little and pet her head before swimming to the side of the pool. I grab a towel off the lounge chair by the pool, and after I’m wrapped up, I say, “All clear.”
Carrie climbs out of the pool dressed in shorts and a tank top. She looks really good. Her sea foam green tank top is clinging to her trim curvy body, and her nipples are hard and poking through the thin padding of her bra.
“Stop gawking at me and go get me a towel.”
“Here, you can have this one.”
I pull my towel off and throw it at her, which makes her blush beet red, and she releases a funny choked sound. I laugh a little as I pick up my discarded clothes before walking back to the house.
I take a quick shower to wash the chlorine off, then slip into a pair of light pajama pants and a tee shirt. I use a small dab of pomade to fix my hair, gloss my lips with coconut oil, then put some deodorant on.
“Hey, you want a beer or a mixed drink?”
Carrie has also changed into pajama pants and a tee shirt, and she’s sitting on a stool leaning on the buffet counter, but she doesn’t look up at me to answer. She just shrugs a shoulder and starts picking at the cuticle of her thumbnail. It’s a habit I hate so I reach out and separate her hands.
“Don’t start doing that. I hate when people do that. It’s annoying and makes your fingers look disgusting.”
“Sorry. Can you make me a strong drink, but something kind of sweet?”
“Sure. How was work?”
“It was ok. What do all of your tattoos mean?”
“Each of them has a different significance.”
“Can you tell me about them?”
“That could take a while, but sure. Here.”
I hand her a glass, and she follows me out to the living room. We sit on the couch, and she scans my neck and left arm before pointing to my neck first.
“Why do you have this one?”
The tattoo is a noose hanging from the back of my ear, to about halfway down my neck, and it’s cut through its loop.
“This was the first tattoo I got when I turned eighteen. It symbolizes cutting the restraints that were holding me back and were essentially killing my true self. It’s mostly about my coming out as gay, but it’s also about starting my career as a software creator, without having to go to college like people said I had to. It basically symbolizes ignoring to the opinions of others that woul
d destroy me if I gave in a listened to them.”
“Wow, that’s pretty significant. I thought it was weird before, but I really like that. Can I touch it?”
“Sure, but it doesn’t feel like anything. It’s not a textured tattoo.”
She leans in and traces the side of my neck with her first two fingers before lifting my shirt sleeve to look at my shoulder.
“What about this raven with a key in its beak?”
“Ravens are known for being scavengers. They tend to just feed off of dead carcasses instead of hunting. They survive off of what others turn their noses up at and what people forget about. It’s to symbolize that not being judgmental is the key to survival and will help me to thrive in this messed up world.”
“That is really deep. Did you come up with these on your own?”
“I came up with the concepts, but I didn’t draw them. A friend drew this one for me about twelve years ago.”
“I’m not going to make you tell me all of them because you have nearly a full sleeve, but there was one on your back I want to ask about.”
She sits on my other side and pushes me forward to pull my shirt up. She traces her fingers over the tattoos then rests her hand on my ribs.
“Is this a rose eating a fish in the desert?”
“It sure is.”
“What the hell does this mean?”
“That nature will always find a way to survive.”
“I don’t get it.”
“A few years ago, I was watching this monster fish show, and they were talking about this specific type of pacu fish. There are many within the species, but this particular one was an herbivore. It was never known to eat other fish, ever. Well, they introduced this pacu to a small fishing community in South America because they had overfished the native species and were desperate for food and income. For a while, the plan worked out well, but over time, the pacu ate all of the native vegetation. Since they were running out of food, they started eating each other, and even taking bites out of humans and mammals, like dogs and cattle. They evolved from herbivores to omnivores out of a need to survive.”
“That’s interesting. You’re interesting.”
I laugh hard and lean back against the couch. “You’re just figuring that out?”
“I’m sorry.”
She leans back, sitting pressed against my side, and lifts my arm to wrap around her shoulders. I rub her arm up and down for a moment before just holding her shoulder. We just sit like this in silence while we finish our drinks, but it’s not uncomfortable. It’s nice that she’s not at my throat about something like she typically is. I like that she feels comfortable to sit with me like this.
After I finish my last gulp, Carrie takes my glass and sits forward to stand up.
“I’m going to get us a refill. Do you want anything else?”
“No, I’m good.”
While she’s in the kitchen, I turn the TV on and start flipping through the movie menu, trying to find something to watch. I find a new scary movie I’ve never seen before that I’d like to watch with Janae, so I send her a text asking if she wants to come over tonight when she’s done at the bakery.
Janae: I’ll be there. How are you doing on beer?
“Hey, Carrie! How much beer do I have left in the fridge?”
“Four bottles. Do you want one?”
“No, thanks.”
Janae: Ok, I’m going to pick up a few cases. Anything specific you want?
Me: You know what I like.
Janae: Yes, I do. Don’t you forget that.
Me: Never. I’m trying to find a movie to watch with Carrie. I don’t know what she likes though.
Janae: You haven’t watched TV together yet? She’s been there like a whole month.
Me: Yeah, I know. I guess I’m a terrible roommate.
Janae: No, you’re not. She’s probably a Disney High School Musical fan.
Me: I just laughed so hard. I am not fucking watching that shit. I’ll have to find a comedy or an action movie or something.
Janae: You better not watch a horror movie with her.
Me: You know that’s our thing. Ok, she’s back with some drinks and snacks. I better go. I’ll see you after work. Love you, babe.
Janae: I love you too.
“Why did you want to know how much beer you have left?”
Carrie hands me a tumbler that looks like it’s mostly just liquor, and sits down next to me, practically landing on my lap.
“Janae’s going to come watch a movie with me when she gets done at work. What is this?”
“Whiskey with some peach schnapps.”
“Tastes good. So, comedy or action?”
“You pick.”
Carrie sets a bowl of fresh cut mixed fruit on my lap while she gets settled with her drink in one hand and a bag of pretzel sticks on her other side. Without lifting the bowl, she grabs a cube of cantaloupe and pops it in her mouth with a quiet moan.
“Oh, man, that is the best cantaloupe I’ve ever had. Taste this.”
She offers me a square of melon, so I part my lips and she puts it in my mouth. As soon as I bite into the soft flesh, my mouth is flooded with sweet juice.
“Yeah, that’s really good.”
I settle on a movie, and as I toss the remote aside, she lifts my arm to snuggle on me again. I raise my eyebrow at her, and she gives me a cute content smile.
“What’s happening here?”
“We’re drinking, snacking, and watching a movie. I thought you were smarter than this.”
I laugh and lightly smack her ass, which makes her face spread into a huge smile. “Why are you…?”
She presses a finger to my lips with a giggle, and says, “Shh, the movie started.”
I roll my eyes and turn my attention to the TV. She keeps the fruit on my lap and alternates between feeding both of us fruit and pretzels till the fruit is gone. After the bowl is empty, she sets it on the coffee table, then wraps an arm around my waist and lays her head on my chest.
“Carrie, what are…”
“Shh, I can’t hear the movie.”
Carrie is only clingy like this when she’s emotional. Finding me floating in the pool like a corpse must have really freaked her out.
“Hey, can you pause it? I need to pee and I want another drink.” I pause the movie and she points to my glass, which still has about a shot’s worth of liquor. “Finish that so I can get you another one.”
“I’m good after this.”
“You’re going to make me drink alone?”
“Are you trying to get me drunk?”
“Please, I want another drink, but I don’t like drinking alone.” I groan, dramatically, but I drink the rest of the dark liquor, and she gives me an appreciative smile as she takes my empty glass. “Good girl.”
“Whoa, hold up. What was that?”
I grab her around the waist, pulling her back down on the couch, and she laughs hard as I pinch her sides and knees, tickling her. She has glasses in her hands so she can’t fight me off. She tries to roll away and slide forward off of the couch, but I rip her back up onto the couch.
Between gasping breaths and laughs, she says, “Oh, my god, stop, please. You’re going to make me pee myself.”
“That’s gross. Go to the bathroom, you heathen.”
She laughs and shoves her shoulder into mine, getting me off balance. “Jerk.”
When she comes back, she has changed out of her pajama pants and tee shirt and she’s wearing a tight tank top and short cotton shorts.
“Why did you change? Did you seriously wet yourself?”
“No!” She laughs as she smacks my arm. “I’m getting hot.”
“That’s because you’re drinking like a fucking sailor.”
“Shut up. Push play.”
As the movie starts, she snuggles against my chest, but then sits up and pushes on my shoulder.
“Move into the corner.”
“Why? Do I smell or something?�
�
“No, you smell great. I want to recline some and stretch my legs out.” I move to the corner, but she exhales in annoyance and rolls her eyes. “Jack, you’re not doing it right.”
“Woman, what the hell do you want? I got out of your way so you can have the whole damn couch to yourself!”
“I want to lay on you.”
“Why?”
“Just shut up and get into position. You’re making us miss the movie.”
“You are way too bossy today.”
She just smiles as I move into position, then she slides between me and the back of the couch to lay her head on my chest. She rests her glass on my hip and drapes a thigh over my legs.
“Better?”
“Yes.”
I take a gulp of the drink she brought me and I smile around the mouthful as I savor the flavor.
“What did you put in this?”
“The same as before, but I added some vanilla extract too. I was going for peach cobbler with vanilla ice cream.”
“I like it.”
“So, you like my peaches and cream?”
I laugh hard, and Carrie lifts her head off of my chest with an adorable proud smile. She takes a few sips of her drink, then lays back down.
Damn, this drink is really good. My head is already starting to swim, so I should drink this slower, but I can’t help myself. I finish the drink in next to no time and stare at the empty glass with a defiant scowl, challenging it to be full again. Carrie lifts her head off of my chest, looking between my glass and face, and then laughs at my expression.
“Here, you can have mine.”
“No, I’m already tipsy.”
“Just drink it.”
“Well, if you insist.” I set my empty glass on the floor and accept hers, which only has a little more than two big gulps. “It’s gone. Damn glasses with holes in them.”
Carrie laughs hard and rubs a hand over my stomach. “How else would it get from the glass to your tummy if there weren’t holes in them?”
“Magic.”
“Can you do magic?”
“I’ve been called a magician, wizard, and a god by many women, so I guess you can say that.”
“You’re so modest.”