My fault.
All my fault.
I release a fractured breath, trying not to blink—worried that if I do, my emotions will spill down my cheeks and everyone will bear witness to my fragile state.
My weakness.
Captain studies me through pale eyes, many years etched in the wrinkled skin around them. He makes a gruff sound, then mutters something below his breath before relaying a bunch of orders to his crew.
Kavan shoves my basket at me and stalks toward the stairs that disappear below deck. Vanth stays a moment longer, watching me with a guarded expression that makes me want to fidget.
“You’re on a Bahari vessel now, Mistress.”
The last word is tossed at me like a threat.
“Thank you, Vanth. I’m well aware.”
“Good.”
He scores me with scrutiny for a moment longer, gaze flicking to my cupla before he follows the same path Kavan just took.
The moment he disappears from sight, I loosen a tight breath ...
Perhaps he didn’t take too well to being knocked on his arse.
Everyone begins to buzz around, preparing to break away from port. Desperate to tuck into a quiet corner, I make for the bow of the boat where I can look down on the wake it will soon be carving through the merciless, gray ocean.
I remove my hairpin, letting my heavy locks fall around me like a shield, as if it could protect me from the stares drilling holes in my back.
Gripping my baby conch, I search for another sign of those silver frills stirring up the water, but Kai is nowhere to be seen.
A painful pang of regret twists my insides ...
I should have been honest with him, but Kai would want nothing more than to rescue me, and he can’t save me from myself.
I close my eyes and lift the shell to my lips. “I’m so sorry ...”
The words are whispered, and I swear the shell speaks back to me, though when I lift it to my ear, all I get is the breathing sound of the ocean.
Glancing out across the bay, I’m unable to stop the tear that slips free, using my shoulder to wipe it away.
Strong, composed, resilient.
I shouldn’t look to Castle Noir—know that if I do, it could plant yet another seed of regret.
Not that it stops me.
My eyes flick up, stare landing on the dense, black smudge protruding from the cliff like a grisly diadem. Salty air whips at my hair, seasons my lips, and chills my cheeks as I explore everything I hold so dear ...
It’s hard to breathe looking up at my whole life from afar, so I dip my nose into the basket, letting him fill my lungs and soothe my chaotic mind.
“Outward bound!” one of the sailors shouts, and the boat peels away from the dock. The main sail is lowered and wind fills its belly, lurching us forward with such force I’m compelled to drop my basket in exchange for gripping the rail.
A deep rumble rattles the air, as though a mountain just shifted from its ancient perch. The hairs on the back of my neck lift, and my gaze lashes to the tip of Stony Stem perched high in the sky like the pinched bud of an immature bloom ...
To the robust shadow of a man standing on my balcony, watching us leave.
Rhordyn.
He looks so out of place, his severity contradicting the pretty, delicate blooms of my wisteria vine twisting around the balustrade.
An icy trail of perusal carves across my face, to my wrist, before whipping down my leg as if tasting my blood from afar.
My breath becomes prisoner to lungs that have forgotten how to function ...
He won’t let you go, Orlaith. He will hunt you.
The echo of Baze’s parting words rattle me to the core, though a stronger, more dominant part of me rears up, almost welcoming the challenge.
He can try.
I square my shoulders and pretend Rhordyn’s arctic scrutiny isn’t flaying me from afar as the wind pushes me toward the arms of another man.
Thank You
Thank you for reading To Bleed a Crystal Bloom! I hope you’ve enjoyed Orlaith’s journey so far.
This story first came to me in a dream, and it hasn’t let me go since. I’d planned the entire series before I wrote a single word—it just spoke to me.
The characters.
The world.
The relationships.
There is so much story left to tell. In many ways, I’ve barely chipped the surface with the first installment, but I really wanted to give Orlaith’s origin the justice it deserved. These characters have a long way to go before we reach that final full stop. I can’t wait to take you all on this journey with me.
The next book in the series is To Snap a Silver Stem, and the preorder is already available here.
For anyone who wants to hear the songs that inspired me while I was writing this book, here is my To Bleed a Crystal Bloom playlist.
To keep in the loop with teasers, signed paperback forms, and giveaways, join my reader group or follow my Instagram.
Again, thank you for reading!
—Sarah
Acknowledgments
This story took an entire year to create, and I couldn’t have done it without the help of my friends and family.
My babies—thank you for being so patient while Mummy wrote her book. Thank you for the endless supply of jokes and loves and hugs.
Josh—my love. Thank you for supporting me, for loving me, and for always believing in me. Thank you for being two whole parents in the last few months leading up to my release. You’re amazing, and I’m so lucky to be doing life with you.
Raven—honestly … words evade me. What would I do without you?
Thank you for being my rock, for bringing a brightness to every day, and for the endless deep belly laughs.
Thank you for talking me out of a ditch a thousand times over, for standing up for this story when I was at my weakest, and for giving me the courage to make it across that finish line. Your friendship means the absolute world to me, and I can’t wait to be back in the sprint room together, quoting Pride and Prejudice, and drinking all the coffee we were meant to give up six months ago.
Mum—thank you for your unending support. For knowing when to empathise, and when to tell me to pick myself up and keep going. Thank you for all the heartbeats you poured into helping me polish this story. I love you.
The Editor & The Quill—Chinah, thank you for everything you poured into this story. Thank you for your friendship, your mastery, your attention to detail. Thank you for digging so deep and for the late nights and early mornings. You go above and beyond, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life.
Brittani—thank you for your friendship, your laughs, your listening ear, your attention to detail. Thank you for listening to hours and hours of voice messages when I first came up with the idea for this story and had to blurt it all out. You’re amazing, you really are!
A.T. Cover Designs—Aubrey, thank you for the stunning cover. For pouring so much heart and soul into every single one of my graphics, and for bringing my story to life visually. You are incredibly talented, and I’m constantly blown away by everything you do!
Affinity Author Services—thank you for going out of your way to make things as easy as possible for me when I had to push my release date back! And for the words of wisdom that were priceless and so very needed.
Philippa—thank you for your eternal support, and for giving our babies a change of scenery when you knew I needed to knuckle down and reach that finish line!
Sarah. Xo
About the Author
Born in New Zealand, Sarah now lives on the Gold Coast with her husband and three young children. When she’s not reading or tapping away at her keyboard, she’s spending time with her friends and family, her plants, and enjoying trips away in the snow.
Sarah has been writing since she was small, but has only recently begun sharing her stories with the world. You can follow her on the social media links below.
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Sarah A. Parker, To Bleed a Crystal Bloom
To Bleed a Crystal Bloom Page 38