“Of course not.” His answer was swift and fervent. “I just didn’t want to push you into anything you might not be ready to do, given the circumstances.”
“You’re not pushing. I’m asking.” I slid my hands down his back to grip that fine ass that always filled me with want. “No, I’m demanding.” I rolled over so that I lay on top of him. “And I won’t take no for an answer.”
“Believe me, I’m not telling you no.” Nicky tugged on my arm until I landed flat on top of him, my breasts pushing against his bare chest. “But let me love you, sweetheart. Let me take care of you.”
He turned slightly, just enough that I was cradled in his arms as he propped himself above me. Sweeping my hair away from my face, he leaned down and covered my lips in a gentle, almost reverent kiss. I let my eyes drift shut and centered all of my focus on the way his mouth felt against mine.
His breath was hot against my skin as he trailed kisses over my cheek, along my jaw and then down the column of my neck. I shivered when the tip of his tongue touched my collar bone.
“Ky, do you have any idea how beautiful you are?” The vibration of his low murmur tickled, and I squirmed a bit. “Your skin here is so soft. And you smell like . . .” He breathed deeply. “Your spring flowers, of course. It’s nearly time for them to blossom again, isn’t it?”
“Almost.” My voice was breathy and almost dreamy. Nicky’s touch was hypnotizing me, slowly and surely.
“Hmmm.” He eased lower and cupped one breast in his palm. “And here you are softest of all.” His mouth hovered just over the tip that ached for his attention. “Except just in this one spot. He lowered his head and sucked the nipple deeply, not changing his rhythm even when I arched my back and gave a small cry of pleasure.
Nicky continued to worship my breasts, moving from one side to the other, over and over again, until I was nearly weeping with need.
“Nicky,” I gasped. “Please.”
Only then did he glance up into my face with a slight smile and slide lower down me, until he was lying between my legs.
“Open for me, darling.” His hands caressed the sensitive skin on my inner thighs. “Let me make you feel good.”
I combed through his hair with my fingers. “You always do.”
He smirked. “Then let me make you feel even better.”
With his tongue, his lips and his teeth, he proceeded to do just that, bringing me closer and closer to the precipitous edge of complete surrender. When I thought I might die of needing to reach the pinnacle, he pressed his thumb against the perfect, throbbing spot, and I splintered to pieces, shattering and rising and coming together again.
I hadn’t even begun to catch my breath before Nicky was over me again. Kissing my lips, he slid deep inside me, filling me again and again until amazingly, I found myself bowing up once again, making a desperate grab for a second climax. When he groaned, emptying himself into me, I fell apart again, seeing only a blast of bright colors against my closed eyes.
And then, in the wake of that pinnacle of pleasure, great gulping sobs tore from my chest and hot tears poured over my cheeks. I shook, gasping with the force of my grief and pain.
“Ky. My Ky.” Nicky held me, comforting me with his soft words and stroking hands. “It’s all right, sweetheart. I’m here. Cry. Let it out.”
“I d-don’t know why I-I’m crying now.” I shuddered as a fresh bout gripped me. “I’m s-sorry, Nicky.”
“Don’t you dare apologize.” Withdrawing from my body carefully, he sat up and scooped me onto his lap, cradling me close. “It’s a very natural thing to need an affirmation of life in the wake of death and grieving. And sometimes, we need one strong emotion to pull another out of us. You needed the outlet of a good cry, I think. So go ahead. I’ve got you, and I’m never going to let you go.”
I had unwavering faith that Nicky meant what he said, and trusting in that, I buried my head in his chest and wept.
Death is an odd thing. It steps into the midst of life and brings nearly everything to a halt. And it can also remind us all of what is truly important and bring people together in unexpected ways.
On the afternoon before Handsome’s funeral, I sat in the small sitting room downstairs, trying to write the eulogy I’d agreed to deliver. My father had assured me that it wasn’t necessary for me speak; he was going to give the longer message, talking about his father’s incredible life, family and business. But I’d wanted to do this last favor for the grandfather who had demonstrated his love for me and his belief in me every day of my life. It was the least I could do.
Nicky had assured me that there would be no press at the service or even anywhere near the church or cemetery. I’d spoken to Sophie the day before, and she’d assured me of the same thing.
“They’re all very sorry, Kyra. I’ve had more messages from reporters and photographers, asking me to pass on their condolences and best wishes to you. I know they too often harass you, but they really do like you, too.”
I’d refrained from expressing my opinion on that topic, but still, it would be a bit more freeing to talk about Handsome when I wasn’t worried about sharing a story that might cast me in a poor light or about accidentally pressing my lips together, which I’d been told by Aline made me appear to be in immense pain. It wasn’t going to be easy to put into the spoken word what my grandfather meant to me—who he was and what meaning his life had held. Anxiety about reporters would’ve made it even worse.
“Ky?” A familiar voice in the hall just outside the open door drew my attention, and when I saw who was standing there, I jumped to my feet.
“Shelby.” I clung to my friend, hugging her tightly. “You came. Oh, you came. Thank you.”
“Of course, I came.” She drew in a long breath that shook at the end. “As soon as Sophie called me, I started making arrangements.” Shelby drew back a little. “I had trouble getting a flight, so I ended up driving to Texas and flying from there. Vivian picked me up at the airport, but she made me sleep for a little bit before I drove here. She was afraid I’d fall asleep at the wheel.”
“I’m glad she did. She’s a good big sister.” I stepped back and motioned to the love seat and chairs. “Come on. Sit down.”
We settled onto the small sofa, and Shelby kicked off her shoes, tucking her feet beneath her in the corner. “Kyra. I can’t believe that Handsome . . .” Her voice caught. “Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry. You know how much I loved him, too.”
“I do know.” I leaned forward to pat her knee. “And so did he. You know Handsome and Honey considered you their fourth granddaughter. They adored you.”
Shelby sniffled. “I can’t believe he’s gone.” We were both quiet for a moment before she spoke again, hesitatingly. “How are you doing with all of this, Ky? Considering everything that’s been going on—it’s got to brutal just now.”
I laughed without too much humor. “It’s been a whirlwind, that’s for sure. The whole interview debacle was overshadowed when Daisy eloped, and then with Handsome–” I shook my head. “Sophie tells me that all the press in Britain now is very sympathetic. They’ve been writing stories about my incredibly close relationship with my grandparents and reporting that I’m devastated that he won’t be at my wedding. One article even claimed that I’d planned to have him walk me down the aisle, which is ridiculous, of course. But I guess it’s better than all of the press circling us here like vultures. Believe it or not, they’ve been very respectful of our privacy.”
“Amazing.” Shelby rolled her eyes. She gnawed on her lip. “Kyra, I want to say I’m sorry for the way I ended our last conversation. And for not calling back or making a date to talk again. I just—it’s all so damned complicated and messy, and I can’t find my way out of it.”
I studied her drawn, pale face. “Can’t you just break it off, Shel? End things with—what’s his name? Cabe?”
Her forehead wrinkled as she drew together her brows. “I don’t think I want to end things. That’s the pro
blem. I know what I should do. I know what the smart thing to do would be. But I also know it would hurt, and I’m not ready to give up on the idea that maybe it—maybe we—can work out.”
“Has he spoken to you about the future?” I didn’t know anything about Shelby’s supervisor, but I knew that most people in his position were substantially older than either Shelby or I were at the moment.
“Not in so many words, but sometimes he talks about what we might do after this project is over. He’s suggested that there might be a way for me to stay on in New Mexico once my internship has ended. So that must mean he sees our relationship as long-term, right?” She looked so hopeful that I didn’t have the heart to snort derisively, which was actually what I felt like doing.
“I don’t know, Shelby.” I chose my words carefully, as though I were picking my way through a dangerous minefield. “It seems to me that a decent guy, a good man, wouldn’t put the women who work under him in your position. If he really cared for you, he could’ve waited until after the internship was over, or he could’ve resigned and then had a relationship with you. I feel like maybe he’s a little selfish.”
“You don’t know him, Kyra.” Shelby’s voice was a mixture of defiance and sadness. “You don’t know him. He’s not that way at all. He’s brilliant and incredibly charismatic and sexy as hell—he could have any woman, but he said once he saw me, once we met, everyone else disappeared for him.”
I nodded slowly. “Well, I’m sure that it’ll work out, then. If he really does feel that way about you, and you’re in love with him, too. You’re a smart woman, Shelby. You know what you’re doing. Right?”
“I hope so,” she murmured. “I haven’t said anything about Cabe to my parents or to Vivian and Charlie. But Aunt Gail came out to visit me, and she met him.”
“Oh, did she?” Shelby’s Aunt Gail was actually her mother’s best friend, a woman who had always been very close to both Vivian and Shelby. I’d met her a few times while we lived together in Maine, and she’d always struck me as a particularly sensible woman. “And what did Gail think about Cabe?”
Shelby’s eyes shuttered. “She said I should be careful. She didn’t seem to think too highly of him.” She wilted against the arm of the love seat. “But she can’t see how much I love him, and how perfect we are together. She’ll understand, eventually. I just need to put my head and get through this last part of the internship, and then things will ease.”
“If there’s anything I can do, you know I’m always here for you, Shel.” I paused. “Even when I’m in England, I’m only a call away. Oh, and if you want to bring Cabe as your guest to the wedding, you just have to let me know, so he can be added the guest list. I think there’s still time to squeeze him in there, if you want me to do that.”
“Could I really?” Her face lit up. “That would be incredible, for the two of us to get away from New Mexico for a little while. And then you and Nicky could meet him, too.”
I regretted my offer now, because unless I was very mistaken, I didn’t think I was going to like Dr. Cabe Mallar very much. But I’d said it, and now I couldn’t take it back. “Sure. Just make sure I get all of his information, because everyone who’s coming has to be vetted by the security team.”
“Oh, right. I understand.” She grinned. “I totally get it. Don’t most brides do background checks on their guests?”
She was teasing, and I decided this was a good sign. “If they don’t, they should. Think of the problems that might prevent. Wedding crashers, last minute objections . . . and those pesky people you don’t like but who your mother tells you must invite.”
“True. Though I guess for you, it’s more likely the people the groom’s grandmother insists on inviting.”
I shrugged. “The Queen doesn’t really interfere with the wedding plans. There are a few things that go through her office for approval, but by and large, it’s up to us—and the staff constantly monitoring our every move.” I wrinkled my nose. “And they are worse than ten mothers of the bride, I think. Every time I make any kind of choice, it feels as though they’re looking over my shoulder, judging.”
“Poor Ky,” teased Shelby. “It’s a tough life when you’re marrying a prince.”
“It really is,” I agreed, tongue in cheek. “Oh, but here’s something very cool. Guess who’s invited to our wedding?”
She cocked her head. “Lots of people. Uh, I don’t know. The president?”
“Oh, well, probably, but this is much more important.” I paused for dramatic effect. “Ed Sheeran. Ed freakin’ Sheeran is invited to my wedding.”
“Oh, my God!” Shelby clapped her hand over her mouth. “Is he coming? Will he sing? Can I be seated next to him?”
I giggled. “He hasn’t responded yet, but even if he does, I doubt he’ll sing. And I don’t know about the seating. That’s handled by the Palace staff. But I’ll tell you what—if he does come, I’ll make sure you’re introduced, all right?”
“Oh, it’s so cool to have celebrity friends.” Shelby stretched out her bare foot to nudge my thigh. “Are we being disrespectful, talking about all this when we’re mourning Handsome?”
“Are you kidding? Handsome would be sitting down here, being irreverent right alongside us if he were here.” I thought about the ever-present infectious twinkle in my grandfather’s eyes. “He was a man who knew how to have a good time. He loved to enjoy himself, and he loved to laugh.”
“Do you remember when we’d first moved into the cottage up in Maine, and he decided he was going to help us replace the pipes under the sink?” Shelby’s smile was tinged with sadness. “And when he couldn’t get it fixed, he said—”
“I’m not a damned plumber, girls, I’m a businessman! A juice maker!” I mimicked my grandfather’s deep voice. “And then he called a real plumber and had it all fixed, and while the guy worked, the three of us sat outside and drank beer and watched the moose.”
“And he told us stories of when he and Honey were young hippies.” Shelby sighed. “They had some wild adventures.”
“They sure did.” We lapsed into a comfortable silence, each of us lost in our own thoughts, until I scooted over to sit closer to Shelby and lay my head on her shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re here, Shel. Thank you for coming.”
She slid her arm around me and rested her cheek on top of my hair. “As if I would’ve stayed away at a time like this.”
We sat that way for a long time, and in being together, we both found some solace.
16
“Kyra, would you like to walk on the beach with me?” Honey stepped into the kitchen, where I was drying the last dish after lunch. “It’s such a lovely afternoon. I can’t go too far or take it too fast, but I’d really like to get outside and enjoy this air and sunshine.”
“Sure.” I draped the dish towel over the handle of the oven door. We’d been jealous of our family time over this last week since Handsome had left us; with a few occasional exceptions, my parents had given the housekeeper and her helpers time off. They usually looked after Honey and Handsome, but between my mother and my sisters, Nicky and me—and Shelby, as long as she’d been here—we were more than capable of fixing meals and washing dishes. It was a relief not to have non-family folks with us in the house.
Aside from the reason we were in Florida, of course, this past week had been a balm to my soul. I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed time with my family, days away from the spotlight and the pressure from the Palace. We were flying back to London tomorrow, and I was already beginning to feel the creeping sense of real life descending upon us.
But for now, I was in the warm sunshine, my bare feet sliding through the hot sand and the frigid ocean water by turns. And my grandmother was walking alongside me. I’d never thought I’d taken my grandparents for granted, but now, each second I had with Honey was precious.
“Are you anxious to get back home?” She side-eyed me speculatively. “You and Nicky seemed to be quite happy here.”
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“Oh, well.” I floundered for a moment. “I mean, yes, it’s been a welcome break from all the wedding pressure. And no, I’m not looking forward to leaving you and the rest of the family. But Nicky has commitments—and I do, too. We all have to go back to real life, I guess.”
“There’s no escaping, it seems.” Honey smiled faintly. “I’m not particularly excited about it myself. I keep coming up with reasons to keep you all here with me. One more meal. One more day.” She gave her head a small shake. “I keep putting off the inevitable moment when everyone is gone, and your grandfather’s loss hits me all over again.”
“I’m sorry, Honey.” I gently bumped my shoulder against hers. “I bet Lisel could stay with you a bit, if you wanted. Or Mama. You don’t have to be alone.”
“Sweet girl, at some point, everyone must resume their lives, and I have to figure out what the rest of mine is going to look like.” She slowed her steps and turned to stare out into the undulating sea. “I lived with that man for fifty-seven years. We were married for fifty-four. I can hardly remember a time when we weren’t part of each other—part of our waking up and going to sleep and everything in between. I wonder if I’ll remember how to be me, without him.”
“Please do, Honey.” I slipped one arm around her waist and hugged her. “Because I’m selfish enough not to want to lose you yet.”
“Oh, darling, I’m not going anywhere. Certainly not before I get to watch you marry the man you love.” She hesitated a beat. “Kyra, you really do love Nicky, don’t you? You’re not marrying him because Handsome and I pushed, are you?”
“Good Lord, Honey. No.” I shook my head. “Of course, I love Nicky. He’s the one man I want in my life for always. Like you said—he’s part of me, and I can’t live without that part.” I snickered. “Besides which, you should know better than to think that you could push me into anything I didn’t want to do. I’m a stubborn woman. I get it from my grandmother.”
The Anti-Cinderella Takes London Page 14